We pull into a massive parking lot.
Universal Studios Hollywood.
I rub my eyes. I pinch myself. I suck in a deep breath and let out a shallow exhale.
The sign still says Universal Studios Hollywood.
Suddenly, I'm flush with energy. I tap my feet together. I tug at my seatbelt. "You're taking me to the Harry Potter thing?"
"They have other attractions."
"Who cares about the other attractions?" I'm so excited I'm bouncing. It's right there on the sign: Now open: The Wizarding World of Harry Potter. "We're going to see Hogsmead. And Hogwarts. And we can have wands choose us. And get robes. And drink Butterbeer."
Joel's smile lights up his green eyes. "Damn, I thought you'd be more excited," he teases.
"Joel!" I squeeze his hand. Then I'm rambling about every single attraction I want to see.
I keep rambling about Harry Potter as we park in the VIP section. As Joel dons a baseball cap and sunglasses. As he takes my hand and leads me to the entrance—we already have VIP tickets that let us skip most of the lines in the park.
I'm still rambling about how much I wish I was more like fan favorite bossy, know-it-all Hermoine when Joel slides my sunglasses onto my face.
His smile is so wide it's about to bust off his face.
His fingers skim my cheeks.
My skin buzzes from his touch. It's not just the heat of desire. There's a warmth of affection too.
He's taking me to the Harry Potter exhibit. And he's listening to my fan ramblings. He's really listening, not tuning it out the way Anne and Dad do.
He really cares what I think.
"You look so happy," I say.
"I'm happy you're happy."
He is.
The thought makes me warm all over.
He slides his arm around me as I unwrap my map. There are all sorts of other attractions, but none of them matter to me. I head straight towards The Wizarding World of Harry Potter.
Joel leans in to whisper, "You can be just as bossy as Hermoine."
"That's quite a high bar."
"Even so."
"You mean when we're… during sex?"
"Yes. But right now," he pulls me tighter, "you're taking charge, angel. If I don't follow you, I'm going to lose you."
That is true. I turn to Joel with a smile. I'm teasing him back. "Don't tell me you suddenly have a problem with me being bossy?"
He smiles back at me. "As long as you know I'm going to be the one in charge when we get home."
Desire pools in my core. Dammit, I want him already. I want him pressing me against the wall and issuing illicit orders.
But there's more than that. The way he's smiling, with all that affection—I want that just as much.
I want his heart as much as I want his body.
"Whatever do you mean?" I tease him back as we take the path on the left. The concrete is lined with bushes and trees. It's still very much a theme park.
This time, Joel doesn't whisper. He says this loud enough that anyone can hear. "I'm going to finally fuck that gorgeous ass of yours."
My cheeks flush.
My chest.
My entire body is red.
No one is gawking. No one is grabbing security to get us kicked out of the park.
"You okay, angel?" Joel runs his fingers through my hair. "You look a little flushed."
"I…" Um. I'm incredibly flushed. I bite my tongue. I squeeze my hands against my sides. Still, I'm hot all over. "Okay."
"Okay?"
"Don't talk about this kind of thing in front of Hogwarts."
Oh my God.
That's Hogwarts.
Okay, it's not really Hogwarts. Even from here, it's clearly too small. But it looks just like the wizard school, this grand grey castle on top of a rocky mountain.
We're standing at the start of the attraction. The street in front of us is modeled after Hogsmead, the small town by the wizard school. With the sun shining, and the sales kiosks, and the tourists in Hollywood t-shirts, I can tell I'm in a theme park.
But when I look up, at the castle, at the shop signs and the sloped roofs, and the fake snow atop the sloped roofs…
I throw my arms around Joel. "This is amazing."
He hugs me back. "It's just the beginning."
He's right. It's just the beginning.
For us, this really could be the beginning.
Thoughts of our relationship fade as I pull Joel into the attraction. No, I refuse to call it the attraction. It's as close to Hogsmead as I'm ever going to get.
I squeeze Joel's hand as I lead him around town. My conscious thoughts fade. My inner fan girl takes over. I squeal over sips of Butterbeer. It takes just like cream soda.
All day, Joel holds me close.
All day, Joel smiles and laughs and gasps with me.
My happiness really is his happiness.
This is perfect.
He's perfect.
We don't leave the park until ten minutes before closing. My muscles are sore and achy. My stomach is stuffed with Harry Potter themed food (not the greatest, really. Theme park British food leaves something to be desired). My mind is full of sights and sounds.
And my heart—
My heart is so full it's ready to burst.
I squeeze Joel's hand as we pull out of the parking lot. He's still smiling wide. He's still looking at me like my happiness is the only thing he needs.
His voice is bright. "You look sharp in that Ravenclaw jersey."
"You think?"
"Blue and nerdy suits you."
"It's not too much?" I'm also sporting a matching scarf. And a track jacket. And a robe. Okay, and a keychain. A wand.
We did the whole, go to Olivander's, let a wand choose you thing.
And it was amazing.
He's been teasing me mercilessly all day, but he's done it in such a loving way. Like he's endeared by my love of Harry Potter. He wants to share it with me.
"I always thought I was a Hufflepuff," I say.
"The nice ones."
"They're also loyal and diligent. And humble." I tug at his scarf. "Not a good fit for you."
"Fuck no." He flips his scarf over his shoulder. "I'm trusting you, that these gold and crimson guys brag the most."
I nod. "You must know Gryffindor. All the characters are in that house."
He smiles. "After today, I'm pretty sure I can ace any Harry Potter trivia quiz. They're the brave ones."
"Yeah. And they're loyal, and blunt, and maybe a little… impulsive."
He laughs. "If the scarf fits…" He turns back to the road.
I sink into my seat. "I don't want to be the nice, hard-working, humble girl anymore."
"You're not. You're nerdy, creative, and bookish. You're not allowed to have traits other than the ones described by your house," he teases. "So don't let me catch you being cunning or impulsive."
I play with my wedding ring. "It's a little late for that."
Joel laughs. "True."
"I know it's a little silly to put so much stock in which Hogwarts house I belong to."
He shakes his head. "It's not, and don't do that. Don't put yourself down like that."
"I'm twenty-two."
"So fucking what? These books mean something to you. They took you out of your life. They gave you a place to belong. A way to look at the world. That fucking matters. I don't make music for the money or the fame."
"Or the groupies."
He sticks his tongue out. "I never picked up women at shows. That's not the relationship I want to have with my fans."
"You don't want them to believe they only love you because they want to fuck you?"
He cocks his head to one side. "Maybe."
"Aww. You don't want to get by on your looks."
"Is that a crime?"
"No. It's cute."
"I don't mind playing that card."
"I saw your show. And that poster."
He laughs
. "That poster is grade A spank bank material. And I get that the hot rock star fantasy is part of why I get to do this. I don't mind—"
"You love the attention."
"Maybe."
"And you're okay playing a role."
He nods. "It lets me spend my life making music. I get to brighten people's lives, three minutes at a time."
"You do."
"Yeah?"
"My sister… when she listens to Dangerous Noise, she has that look. Like she's where she belongs. Like someone understands her."
"Like you with these books."
Like me with Joel.
He's still smiling.
He's still looking at me like I light the stars.
I open my mouth, but words won't find the way to my tongue. I can't explain my feelings for him. Or his feelings for me.
I've never felt like I belonged anywhere.
But right now, I'm sure I'm where I belong.
"Thank you." It's all I can manage.
"Hey. You're the one who bought me this incredibly phallic source of power." He motions to his wand. "If I want to make magic, I have to grab my stick and recite the proper words."
"Joel…" I can't exactly protest. He's dead on about the wands being phallic. "You're ridiculous."
"You love it."
"I do." And I might even love him. But I'm not ready to face that possibility yet. Not with everything else hanging over my head. "Tomorrow is our appointment."
He nods. "It is."
"Are you thinking… what are you thinking?"
He says nothing.
Shit.
My need to fill the silence catches up with me. "I have to talk to my dad soon. Whatever happens tomorrow, I have to tell him about law school." And I have to hold strong. The telling him is the easy part compared to the not crumbling under the weight of his disapproval part.
"You're making leaving school official?"
"I think so. After I tell Dad." I swallow hard.
"You can do it." He rubs the space between my thumb and forefinger with his thumb.
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. Already, the joy of the day is fading. Clouds are forming over my head. It's getting cold in here.
The scenery is getting ugly.
Joel's voice is calm, even. "Say it again."
"Which part?"
"That you don't want to be a lawyer."
My shoulders tense up. I have to force the words off my lips. "I don't want to be a lawyer."
"Again."
This time, it's a little easier. "I don't want to be a lawyer." My exhale breaks up the tension forming in my upper back. "I don't want to go back to law school."
"What do you want?" Joel squeezes my hand. "Besides my wand?"
"Ew."
"Baby, you want my wand so bad you're panting."
Maybe. I shake my head. "Wand is not a sexy euphemism."
"But this is the most powerful wand of all time."
I have to laugh. There's something about Joel. He's derailing me with sex, sure, but it's what I need right now.
I better tell him this now. Before he pushes my mind straight into the gutter.
"I'm not sure what I want to do. If I want to take that job offer from Alessandra… She's only offering it because you're my husband."
"That's how the world works."
"Even so." My voice is soft. What if Joel isn't my husband anymore tomorrow? She won't still want me as her assistant.
"You'd be good at it."
"Maybe."
"Absolutely." He looks to me. "You think you'd like it?"
"Yeah. Maybe I wouldn't love it, but it would be a good first job as a law school dropout."
"You get used to being a university drop out. Trust me."
I do.
That's the problem.
I trust Joel more than I've ever trusted anyone.
If we get to that appointment tomorrow and neither one of us calls it off…
I can't think about this right now. The anxiety is threatening to swallow me whole.
I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. "I, um, I'd like to get home as quickly as possible."
His voice drops to that low demanding tone. "Yeah?"
"Did you mean what you said before?"
He cocks a brow.
"About… wanting to…" I clear my throat. I've gained a lot of sexual confidence, but I'm not even near Joel's level.
"You want my cock in your ass?"
"Yes."
"Not sure I can drive in this state, but yeah. Of course I meant that."
"Oh. Well—"
"Angel, I want to hear this. But if I want to get home alive—"
"It's that distracting?"
He clears his throat.
Feminine power fills me. I'm distracting Joel enough he's worried he's going to crash the car.
Ahem.
That is a concern.
I go back to babbling about Harry Potter.
33
Bella
Joel is patient as we park the car, as we walk through the lobby, as we take the tiny elevator to the third floor.
He keeps a calm grip on my hand as he leads me down the hallway.
His posture changes as he unlocks the door.
It's like he's finally out of his cage.
In one swift motion, he pulls me inside.
He pins me to the door as he turns the lock.
His green eyes fix on me.
Then they're fluttering closed.
His lips crash into mine.
His hand slides between my legs. His fingers stroke my inner thigh. Even with my jeans in the way, the friction is divine.
I part my lips to make way for his tongue.
He tastes so good.
I need this so badly.
Need him so baldy.
Bit by bit, all of my senses turn on. I'm not tired anymore. I'm wide awake.
Every inch of my body needs Joel. It doesn't matter that I had him yesterday.
I might not have him tomorrow.
I think I will.
I hope I will…
I should bring it up. We should talk about it. Like adults.
But I can't bring myself to do anything but kiss him back.
I need him right now.
I need to know he's mine.
That I'm his.
He pulls my scarf undone and tosses it aside. Then his hands are sliding under my t-shirt and he's grinding his hips against mine.
He's hard.
I want that.
I want everything with him.
But the thought of Joel filling my ass makes me clench up everywhere.
Can I do this?
What if it hurts?
His hips rock against mine.
With his size, it's going to hurt.
I try to push my thoughts aside as I kiss him back, but they won't go.
It's going to hurt. I'm not going to be exciting or dirty or bold enough for him.
I'm not going to be enough for him.
He's going to realize I'm a mess and run away.
What then?
His eyes flutter open as he pulls back. "You're nervous."
I nod. "I'm sorry."
He cocks a brow. "For what?"
"I'm not sure I can do this."
"Don't be sorry about that." His eyes bore into mine. His expression gets serious, caring. "Do you want to?"
"Well, you—"
"No, Bella. Do you want this?"
"Yes." I bite my lip. "I feel so dirty, wanting this."
"Say it."
"I…"
He cups my cheek with his palm, then he's rubbing my temple with his thumb. "Tell me where you want my cock."
My cheeks flush. "I…"
"You're not getting it unless you tell me."
I swallow hard and stare back into Joel's eyes. I do want this. And I can say it. "I want you to fuck… I want you to fuck my ass."
God, I'm red everywhere.
/>
If Mom could hear me, she'd be turning over in her grave.
Chases are nice girls.
And nice girls don't demand anal sex.
Nice girls don't say I want you to fuck my ass.
Joel pins me to the door with his hips. "Say it again, angel."
This time, I don't hesitate. "I want you to fuck my ass." Still, my cheeks flush. I stare back into his eyes. "Will it hurt?"
"A little." He rubs my temple with his thumb. "If it's too much, tell me."
"You won't be mad?"
His brows screw in confusing. "Why would I be mad?"
"I don't know…"
"Don't bend yourself into some shape for me, Bella. Tell me what you want." His eyes bore into mine. "Promise you'll tell me if it hurts."
"Okay."
"Or if you're too nervous."
"I'm pretty nervous."
"That's all right. We don't have to do it today."
But we might have to do it today.
There might not be anything after tomorrow.
Neither one of us has suggested canceling the appointment.
Feelings are swirling around my stomach. I care about him. More. More than like. But I can't say it yet.
I have to be sure.
I can't… "Kiss me. Please."
"Promise."
"I promise I'll tell you if it's too much."
He nods. His eyes flutter closed. His lips brush against mine. Softly. Then harder. His tongue slides into my mouth.
He slides his first two fingers into the belt loop of my jeans and motions come with me.
I follow him to the bedroom.
Moonlight flows in through the curtains and bounces off the white sheets. Joel pulls me onto the bed.
He plants his body next to mine. "Close your eyes."
I do.
"I want you to feel good, Bella."
"Okay."
"I'm not going to hurt you."
I nod.
"You trust me?"
Again, I nod. There's no doubt in my mind. I do trust Joel. I trust him with my body.
And with my heart.
Maybe even forever.
He presses his palm into my lower back as he pulls me closer.
His lips brush against mine.
His hands slide under my shirt.
My body buzzes from the feeling of his fingertips on my stomach. My sides. My ribs.
He cups my breasts over my bra.
The soft fabric presses against my nipples as he rubs me.
I break free of his kiss to groan. "More."
Dangerous Rock: A Rock Star Romance (Dangerous Noise Book 3) Page 23
