Yes, I Can Do This

by Laran Mithras

  She selected a black wool, knee-length skirt. White blouse unbuttoned all the way down her non-existent cleavage. Not having enough to wave around, she went without a bra. She topped it all off with a short-waist wool jacket that matched her skirt.

  She was looking in the mirror and saw her husband.

  Gerald raised an eyebrow. "It's not a special dinner or anything."

  She frowned at him. "It's a steak dinner at the Cask and Candle. Come on, should I be wearing jeans?"

  He gave it some thoughtful consideration. "No, I guess not. Anyway, you look nice."

  Why do husbands always say we look nice and it takes other men to say we look great? What's with that?

  He had a satisfied grin on his face.

  She sniffed, drawing in the aroma if his special cologne. "Not a special occasion, huh?"

  He gave her a questioning look.

  She raised an eyebrow in imitation of her husband. "Are you wearing that to impress Christine?"

  He smiled delightfully. "Um, no, but when else am I going to wear it? I wouldn't wear this to work."

  I guess you have a point. But this is about me being a hotwife, not you being a hothusband. She wagged a finger to him in time with her thoughts.

  In the car, she relaxed into the leather seat and tried to think of ways to act hotwife-ish. Do I press my chest against him? Sounds like fun. Or do I grab his crotch and rub or something? Do I lick my lips and bite my teeth? Gosh, all I had to do was have my eyes open a few years ago and the guys would do all the work.

  The smooth ride of her husband's Cadillac allowed her mind to drift.

  I wonder what Don's cock looks like? I hope it's not small.

  Close friends since her marriage to Gerald, the DeLeons fit her idea of a perfect play-couple for this whole hotwife thing. After the disastrous event with her handsome boss, she couldn't think of a better person to be involved. Don was handsome, charming, always smiling at her, and loved to go boating. He sold boats and yachts in town and made a great living out of it. Christine always seemed willing to talk to Gerald and allow her to talk to Don. She was never jealous and always playfully suggestive.

  They're perfect. I just need to hotwife all over Don and hope Christine doesn't expect the same with Gerald.

  She was in a fine and sublime state of mind when they pulled into the parking lot at the Cask and Candle. Driftwood-colored with heavy black definition in the grain and crevices, the restaurant sported in the entry a large barrel laid sideways with a huge candle set atop it. The candle was carved wood and painted crème to look real.

  The red-haired hostess dressed in a quasi pirate-maiden outfit, lacking only a blade, greeted them.

  Gerald said, "Rina, party of four."

  The hostess looked down at the reservation book and tapped her pen. Her nametag named her Tori. Extra piercings ran up her ears from her earlobes and her eye-liner and mascara was black and extra heavy. She said, "The DeLeons haven't arrived yet. Would you care to sit in the lounge?"

  "Please."

  Tina followed the hostess. She noticed right away the hair was dyed. It was the deep purple-red that never looked natural, but for some reason, it fit the girl. I wonder if she's as wild in bed as she looks in person? Scream? Yell? Kick and bite? Tina tried to hide a smile, but it was dim enough that no one noticed or cared.

  Tori turned. "I'll let you know when the rest of your party arrives."

  Gerald said, "Thank you."

  They sat at a tiny table with stools.

  The lounge hostess was on them immediately. "Would you care for a drink while you wait?"

  Her husband was fast. "Two glasses of Merlot, please. Italian or French is fine."

  The older brunette, nametag of Marilyn, nodded once and twirled away.

  Tina leaned closer to him, though no one was in danger of hearing. "What did you think of the hostess?" She felt a desire to know. Would he think she was fiery? That her image suggested a hot time? Should I portray such an image?

  Her husband looked confused. "Her? Or the first one?"

  "The first one: Tori."

  He raised both eyebrows. "I don't know… A little faked up." That sounded definitive as the end of the conversation.

  She sighed quietly. Is that all you thought? "Was that all? Just fake?"

  He looked more confused. "That was my first impression—"

  "Did you think she was pretty?"

  "I…wasn't really looking at her that way."

  Oh gosh, why is this so hard? It's just a simple question. "You didn't think she was pretty?" She wasn't sure how to ask about the girl's overall effect.

  "I didn't say that. All I noticed was she looked fake."

  That's not what I wanted to hear. Why don't you pay more attention to those around you? She sighed.

  Her husband frowned at her. "You thought she was pretty?"

  Yes! I felt a sexual magnetism that surprised me, that's why I asked. "Maybe, I guess…"

  The brunette returned and placed down two glasses of deep red wine. She slipped the ticket under a napkin.

  "Thank you," Gerald said. His smile and his eyes looked over the woman's face.

  Tina frowned. Why are you looking at her? She's old. She has wrinkles at her eyes. She's like forty. She shook her head as the woman walked away. "Did you get a good enough look?"

  Her husband twisted his mouth. "At her? She was nice-looking."

  She coughed. I wanted you to check out Tori, not Marilyn. "I don't like her."

  He gave her an outraged look of confusion. "I thought she was a lot better-looking than the first one."

  Then I definitely don't want you checking her out. I was hoping for better feedback from you for Tori. "Just keep your eyes to yourself."

  He blew out a breath and sipped his wine. He shook his head as he swallowed.

  Tina twisted her mouth. Men just don't get it.

  Tori came back into the lounge, leading Don and Christine.

  She forgot all about the red-head and focused on her mark: Don DeLeon. He was tall and dashing, a very short covering of black hair combed flat forward – probably to hide a receding hairline. His tanned face gave his smile a brighter look, almost stunning in effect. His hazel-colored eyes were glassy and friendly, as if those who looked into them could sink in forever.

  Don immediately came to her and held out his arms. "Tina, dear, you look stunning."

  She got off her stool. Oh yes, definitely the one: Don's the right man. "Hi, Don." She let herself be scooped into a full hug.

  Christine and Gerald were greeting and hugging as well.

  Tina smiled slyly. You can gawk at her and flirt all you want, hubby. Just don't go further.

  Marilyn came and stood poised gracefully near Don.

  She scowled at the lounge hostess, but the woman didn't notice. She saw her husband glancing at Marilyn. Darn you, stop it. Pay attention to Christine.

  "Would you two like something to take to your table?"

  Don's smile turned to the hostess. "Whatever they're having."

  Marilyn nodded and smiled lightly.

  Go away, woman.

  Her husband nudged her and whispered, "Be nice; she's doing her job."

  Fine, fine, but you don't understand. She rolled her eyes.

  Tori led them through the lounge and into the main part of the restaurant. It wasn't crowded, which was why they didn't need to wait for a table. She turned and held out her hand, fingers curling upward. "Will this be good?"

  Gerald and Don both nodded.

  Tori flashed a smile that made Tina want to see her naked. "Jenny will be your server." She laid down the menus and departed.

  Tina sat, overcome with amusement. Why in the world would I want to see her naked? I'm not a lesbian. But fuck, she makes me hot. What is it about her?

  With alternating men and women, Tina sat with Don on her left and her husband on her right. Christine sat across from her.

  Jenny was a straight-haired blonde who had eno
rmous teeth. "Welcome, I hope you enjoy your stay. Would you like to start off with an appetizer? Our special tonight is stuffed mushroom—"

  Don said, "Those are great. Yes, please."

  Jenny's smile got bigger. "Very good, I'll be right back with them."

  Marilyn was leaning over, placing glasses of Merlot in front of Don and Christine. She did it quietly and unobtrusively.

  Gerald said, "Can I pay this with dinner?" He held up his ticket with two fingers.

  "Of course." She took it gently and left.

  Go away, dammit. Where did Tori go? She turned to Don and smiled at him. How do I start all this? Now or after dinner? When is the right time for the flirting to begin? I don't think I can grab his crotch without my husband and Christine noticing. Too obvious.

  She began during appetizers. She lightly kicked Don's foot.

  He gave her an amused eyebrow and grin.

  She did it again, hoping to get things started.

  His tone was playful. "Why are you kicking me? Am I eating too many mushrooms? You want mine?"

  She giggled and kicked him again. They weren't hard kicks, just taps, really.

  His smile turned more playful and he kicked her back. They began a light game of footsie-war under the table and he began laughing.

  Gerald said, "Are you two having foot troubles?"

  Christine said, "What?" Her smile was curious.

  Tina blushed with a shy grin.

  Her husband leaned over to Christine. "They're battling it out under the table for foot space."

  Gerald's wife peeked under the table and began laughing. "Don't bruise her, dear."

  Tina laughed in response, but mainly relief. Perfect, she approves and supports me vamping her husband. Excellent, my plans are coming to fruition. She had an image in her head of some green cartoon bad guy rubbing his hands together maniacally.

  Tori came near, leading two women: a stout one with buzzed hair and a willowy one with long hair drawn back at her neck.

  Tina adjusted her glasses. She ignored the lesbians and drank in the girl's looks. Yes, I'd definitely enjoy your tongue licking my clit, you dirty bitch. She gasped as her pussy clenched. She grabbed her blouse in fright and picked up her napkin for something to do. A blush crept up her neck. Oh my gosh, like, where the fuck did that come from? She had to stop from fanning herself. "Excuse me a moment."

  Her three table-mates let her go and she almost scurried to the restroom.

  Glancing in the mirror, she grabbed a paper hand towel and wet it. She removed her glasses and gently applied the wet towel all over her face and neck until she was cooled off. Was that a hot flash? Or something else? Maybe I have a brain tumor. Hmm, no, I don't use cell phones. Or maybe it was a heart attack. She placed her hand over her upper chest. Oh my god, maybe it's the Swine Flu or something. I'm too young for menopausal hot flashes.

  She wet her face again until her heart stopped beating so hard. She took a deep breath that wasn't accompanied by shaking. Okay, I'm good to go. I need to focus on this hotwife thing. I know I can do this. Just go straight for it, girl. Telling herself made her feel better.

  Tina walked out, assured and feeling adventurous. Where are you, Tori? Ugh, no. Don. Think Don.

  The man in the reticle of her target gave her a welcoming smile. "Welcome back. Everything's okay?"

  Gerald said, "You feeling all right?" He placed a hand on her forearm.

  Tina wanted to burst with embarrassment. Oh gosh, how do I laugh this off? "I'm fine…I had to get an eyelash out of my eye."

  All three at the table raised their heads in a single understanding nod.

  Christine said, "Ugh, I hate that. Drives me crazy."

  Tina withheld a happy smile. Thank you. "I know, right? Feels like you can't stop blinking like a madman and it just makes it worse. Anyway, sorry for rushing off like that."

  Don waved his hands low over his plate. "No worries. Fully understandable."

  Now, where were we? She grinned at him and kicked him.

  He chuckled and they began the footsie war again.

  ~ ~ ~

  Tina avoided looking at Tori on the way out. She had a hold of Don's right arm, clutching it to her tightly. She made sure her left breast was in full contact.

  Tori's velvet voice fought her focus. "Have a nice night; hope to see you soon."

  Don't look at her. Don't do it, dammit. She clutched tighter on Don's arm.

  He seemed amused.

  Gerald said, "Thanks, good night."

  Christine was on his arm, but not as tight.

  Tina was happy. Play it cool, you two. Don't get too cozy together. Just enough for me to get my way with Don, okay?

  In the parking lot, Don turned to her to give her the goodbye hug – like he always did. The amusement was still there on his face.

  She turned with him, wrapping her arms around him and pressing everything she had against him – just like she did with her husband. She looked up and licked her lips for a kiss. She had never done that during their hugs before and Don's amusement began to color with concern.

  He did not kiss her.

  Tina parted her lips. Is that invitation enough? Come on, do it. Kiss me. This is the perfect hotwife time.

  Christine cleared her throat.

  She felt Don's arms loosen to let go.

  Darn. She let go, too. Maybe next time. She said, "So…we should get together more often."

  There was something of a silence that surrounded them.

  Gerald cleared his throat and said, "Sure. Gimme a call, Don."

  "Yeah, of course." They shook hands.

  Tina's hotwife night with the perfect man ended in failure.

  CHAPTER 7

  Tina said, "What?"

  Her husband was frowning. "Had you too much to drink or something? Don and Christine were sort of shocked by how you acted – hanging all over him…"

  It was the next day, Saturday afternoon.

  Tina's eyes went wide. Uh…shit? "I…"

  Gerald was shaking his head. "Don was embarrassed."

  Oh god, this can't be happening.

  "And Christine was fuming."

  She slapped a hand over her eyes. What did I do? What happened? Don was perfect. "Uh…"

  "I told them you had too much to drink, but I don't know if they bought it. What got into you last night?"

  Maybe I should have grabbed Tori, pulled her into a back room, and forced the nasty girl to lick my clit. She sighed raggedly. "I don't know…"

  Her husband looked at a loss. "You've never acted like that around him before."

  I wanted him to be the man who made me a hotwife! "Well…he's always kind of flirty with me…"

  "So you vamped all over him in front of his wife? What were you thinking?"

  She wanted to cry. He was perfect! And Christine looked happy I was flirting with him. And this is what you want. I know I can do this. Why did it fail? "I…don't know…." The failures resounded in her thoughts: Michael, her boss; Luke from the bar; the interest from two men who turned her off, Derek and Hugh; Cute Fed-Ex guy's non-interest; Don's rejection. She raised her hands in defeat. This is impossible.

  Gerald was shaking his head. "I'm not sure we're going to be having any get-togethers with them again anytime soon."

  She felt totally humiliated. Hotwives aren't supposed to be humiliated; they're supposed to be hot.

  ~ ~ ~

  Sunday was swim day and Tina was a bundle of aggravation and anger. She donned her new two-piece black bikini with small white polka dots. She gave the pieces a wrench to insure they fit right and threw her towel over her shoulder. She almost growled at Gerald. "Quit primping for Valerie. Let's go."

  He wasn’t primping, but it felt good to say it.

  Dammit, how can things have gone so bad? How hard is it to be a hotwife? Fuck!

  Gerald coughed. "I'm not primping for Valerie; don't be gross."

  Yeah, whatever, fine. Let's go.

  "Why are
you scowling?" He was grabbing up his towel and bag.

  Because of Don. "I have a headache."

  "Do you want to stay here?"

  And let Valerie rub her beachballs all over your crotch? Uh, no. "No, the sun should get rid of it. And a dip."

  "Want an aspirin?"

  She snapped back at him. "And kill my stomach lining and kidneys? No thanks."

  "All right, all right."

  They were at the back sliding glass door. She said, "Can we just go?"

  He waved his hand back and forth between her and the door to show her that was exactly what they were doing. "You want me to open it or do you want to just charge through the glass?"

  Ugh, men. How difficult. "Just open it."

  "Yes, ma'am."

  She wanted to scream. She stomped all the way to the pool. She sneered at the signs, wanting to bring in a dog and a glass of iced tea at midnight. Just to show she could.

  Valerie and Connor were not at the pool.

  Gloria was there, though, in her white bikini and gray hair. She was being talked up by three men.

  How does she have it so easy and I can't even get a man to look at me? Her boobs are flatter than mine!

  Gloria didn't act all that interested in having three men pay attention to her, though the men looked happy. Her expression was pleasant without being excited – as if talking was just talking.

  Tina kept glancing over. Does she have fantasies? And about what? She doesn't appear all that interested in the men but she's never looked at the women with any interest. What's your secret, old woman?

  Gerald was already all situated and relaxing in the sun. "Ugh…"

  Tina looked at him. He was looking off to the entrance. She followed his gaze.

  Valerie was blazing a buxom entrance into the pool area. Connor paced like a panther behind her.

  Men turned from whatever they were doing – even the three men chatting up Gloria.

  Tina spent a second watching the old woman's reaction. She saw a blown-out sigh and the roll of eyes. Ha! Yeah, me too, Gloria, me too. Let's gang up on her, abduct her tits, and drown them in the pool.