‘I know. Ignore me,’ he said apologetically. ‘I’m not in the best of moods lately.’
‘I gathered,’ Sally replied understandingly. ‘You do realise that’s exactly what you said all those years ago?’
‘Sorry?’ He sounded mystified.
‘Before we went our separate ways,’ Sally went on, causing the hairs to rise over Emily’s skin. ‘I knew you were struggling then too, but you just shrugged and said to ignore you and that you weren’t in the best of moods. I got that. I mean who would be after all you’d been through, but I never did understand why you closed up on me the way you did.’
Jake hesitated before answering. ‘I didn’t find what happened easy to talk about,’ he said awkwardly, after a second. ‘It was too painful back then, I guess. Still is.’
‘I know it was. What happened with your mum was unimaginably terrible.’ Sally oozed sympathy. ‘But … it hurt, you know, that you turned away from me. I thought we had something, and the next thing I knew you’d left the village without saying a word. I still don’t know what I did wrong.’
‘Nothing,’ Jake said quickly. ‘It wasn’t you, Sally. It was me. I cared for you, a lot, but …’
Emily felt the blood freeze in her veins. They’d had a relationship? A serious relationship? When? Why hadn’t he told her? Why hadn’t Sally? Why wouldn’t they have?
‘You didn’t love me?’ Sally finished sadly.
‘I was young, confused. My emotions were all over the place. I honestly wasn’t sure what I felt.’ Jake paused. ‘I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just …’
‘Needed some space to sort yourself out, I know. Don’t worry, I forgive you, but only because I know how badly you were affected. I’m glad you found someone you could eventually share your problems with.’
‘Yeah.’ He laughed ironically. ‘Not any more.’
‘That bad, hey?’
‘That bad,’ he confirmed, causing Emily’s heart to fracture. ‘It’s the kids I’m really worried about. Millie’s at that age, you know, where she’s pushing boundaries. Ben’s … I don’t know. I’d hoped we might have a better relationship than Tom and I had, but the older he gets, the less it seems we have in common.’
‘He’s probably just a bit shy,’ Sally suggested. ‘Like his dad.’
‘Probably,’ Jake reflected thoughtfully.
‘Not so shy lately, though,’ she added, a playful edge to her voice. ‘I’m liking the authoritative doctor-in-charge thing you have going on. Very hot.’
He sighed ruefully. ‘Yeah, I’m not sure my wife’s that impressed.’
‘She’ll come around. You’re a catch, Dr Merriden. I doubt she’ll want to throw you back.’
‘I wouldn’t be too sure about that.’
‘I would. She won’t let you go easily, Jake, trust me.’ Sally paused. ‘I’d better get on. I have someone due in shortly. Talk later.’
‘Will do. Oh, and Sally …’ Jake stopped her. ‘You haven’t mentioned anything to Emily, have you? About us?’
‘No. Don’t worry, your secret’s safe,’ she assured him. ‘It’s not the sort of thing that’s easy to drop casually into conversation.’
Moving swiftly away from his office as she heard Sally nearing the door, Emily felt a surge of pure rage. Shy? He’d sounded anything but from where she was standing, pouring his heart out to a woman he’d had a relationship with – and hadn’t told her about. Someone he’d ‘cared for’. Now that her eyes had been opened, it was obvious, blindingly obvious to Emily, that Sally cared for him too, which explained her draping herself over him at every opportunity. Her dressing to impress him. Her anger quadrupled as she recalled the tight jeans, leather boots and abundant make-up Sally had been wearing in order to come to her house for nothing more than a girls’ chat. She had thought the woman was simply flirty by nature. She’d even joked about it to Jake, to her utter humiliation. She couldn’t believe that he’d been sharing details about their relationship with her. That he’d just told her that Emily wasn’t there for him any more.
He was twisting everything, blaming her. And now she had absolutely no one to confide in. Not her best friend. Not her GP. Not her husband.
Safely ensconced in a cubicle in the toilets, Emily wondered if it was truly possible to die from a broken heart.
Seventeen
Jake
Watching Sally leave, Jake had never felt so guilty. He’d meant to mention to Emily that he and Sally had once gone out together. It seemed like aeons ago now, but they had been fairly serious, until his mother died and his life had fallen apart. He’d fallen apart, wondered what the point was: of taking his exams, doing all the normal stuff that people did; having relationships. He’d begun to see people in a different light, speculating about what they were really like under the exterior they presented to the world, what secrets they kept. Or didn’t. His father had certainly made no secret of his numerous affairs. Jake would never understand that, not until the day he died. It was some kind of ego trip, he supposed, a way of proving his masculinity.
Why hadn’t he told her? He thought back to the first time he and Emily had run into Sally when they’d moved into the village. Edward and Joyce Simpson had organised a welcome-back party. Sally had been all over him. Drinking more than was healthy, she’d been openly flirting with him. Emily had been put out, understandably, and Jake had decided not to say anything then, rightly or wrongly. When Emily and Sally had struck up a friendship despite that shaky first meeting, he could see Sally working to gain Emily’s trust after her ‘deplorable behaviour’, as she called it, and he’d again declined to say anything, so as not to destroy a potential friendship. He’d supposed Sally would mention it to Emily somewhere along the line. Apparently, she hadn’t.
Given how their marriage was at the moment, he was bloody glad now that Emily didn’t know. He was growing more worried about her state of mind. It hadn’t helped when he’d practically accused her of sending the letter to Michael out of some sense of vengeance. Now he didn’t know what to think. Who would have alerted Dean Miller to the fact that his wife had decided to terminate her pregnancy? Why would they? There was no blackmail involved, nothing to be gained as far as Jake could see, other than some twisted satisfaction from watching people’s relationships fall apart. He needed to talk to the whole team, including his father, and make sure that everyone knew that patient confidentiality was crucial. He also wanted to see their reactions when he told them he suspected one of them was accessing private medical data and using it unethically – as well as illegally. If it was someone on the team, then perhaps they would betray themselves.
Deciding to ring through to reception and ask Nicky or Emily to organise a meeting before close of play, he reached for his phone and then grabbed it up when it rang.
‘I have Dean Miller on the line,’ Nicky said, sounding wary. ‘He’s insisting on speaking to you.’
Jake drew in a breath. He guessed this wasn’t going to be an easy conversation. ‘Thanks, Nicky. Could you put him through?
‘Dean?’ He braced himself as the call connected. ‘What can I—’
‘It’s Zoe,’ Dean cut in, his voice terrified. ‘I didn’t do it, Jake. You have to believe me.’
Eighteen
Emily
Sitting in the waiting area along with the rest of the team, Emily glanced towards Jake as he emerged from his office. He’d asked her to let everyone know he needed to call an urgent meeting once all the patients had left. Emily hadn’t been surprised he would want to talk to them all, after receiving the terrible news about Dean Miller and poor Zoe. Picturing her, a petite, pretty girl who’d looked pale and drawn the last time she’d been to the surgery to see Jake, Emily’s heart broke for her. For her parents, too. What must they be going through, not knowing the extent of her injuries? If it were Millie … A cold shudder running through her, she tried to clamp her mind down on that thought, but couldn’t. Where was Millie going when she disappeared in the evenings?
Emily hadn’t yet told her daughter that she’d rung Anna’s mother; that she knew it wasn’t Anna’s house she was staying at. She’d hoped that Millie might confide in her, before she was forced to confront her. Why would she be so secretive unless she had something to hide? Emily could only think it was because she was afraid that she and Jake would disapprove of the person she was seeing.
Might he be controlling or aggressive in some way? Going through all the stomach-wrenching scenarios, her mind returned to Zoe. What had happened? Since he was being questioned by the police, gossip had it that Dean had been responsible for her fall from the balcony. Emily tried to imagine what could have possessed him to push her, or else terrified her so much she’d climbed up there and fallen. He’d been on the point of losing his temper at the practice today, but he was normally such a gentle, caring young man. Emily didn’t consider herself the best judge of character at the moment, but she couldn’t imagine him ever wanting to hurt Zoe. He’d obviously worshipped her. That much had been obvious from watching them together at their wedding. The expression on Dean’s face when he’d turned to see Zoe walking down the aisle had almost reduced Emily to tears. He’d been bursting with pride, his love for his new bride shining bright in his eyes. Their first dance together had been magical. He hadn’t been able to take his eyes off her as he’d led her around the dance floor to ‘The Way You Look Tonight’. It truly had been the stuff of romance.
The trigger for Dean’s violence had originated here. He’d become privy to information that had rocked his world to the very core, Emily had no doubt about that. She was scared. That email Jake had received had been the catalyst for all of this, and she’d said nothing about it at the time. She still hadn’t told him what the email had implied. She should have. Jake was bound to think, as she now was, that they might have nipped all this in the bud. From the letters other people were receiving, it was becoming obvious that she and Jake were being targeted as part of a malicious plot of some sort. Didn’t that suggest that she shouldn’t be reading too much into the email? On the other hand, the information about Zoe’s abortion was real. Natasha was on the pill, Microgynon 30, Emily had checked. Didn’t that make the implication about Jake’s infidelity true too? And what about the weird texts she herself had received? Might they in some way be connected?
‘This all looks very official.’ Tom, who’d initially been annoyed at being called away from one of his meetings, interrupted her thoughts. Looking wary, he nodded towards Jake, who looked across to them, hesitated, and then detoured towards the water cooler. He looked more in need of a strong brandy. His hands were shaking as he tipped the cup to his mouth, his complexion ashen. Emily felt a turmoil of conflicting emotion. She should hate him, yet still she loved him. Her heart felt as if it was tearing apart inside her at the thought of him cheating on her with Sally.
‘Any idea what this is all about?’ Sally asked. She was sitting opposite Emily, who had ignored her since hearing her intimate exchange with Jake in his office and busied herself trying desperately to catch up with the arrangements for Edward Simpson’s party, firming up the booking of the village hall and returning the call regarding the bar.
‘Zoe Miller.’ Fran, who was standing, rather than sitting – probably so she could be first out of the door with the gossip – filled Sally in. ‘Pushed over her balcony by her husband,’ she said with a dramatic sigh.
‘Shit.’ Sally’s shocked gaze twanged in Emily’s direction. ‘You’re joking.’
‘I wish I was.’ Folding her arms, Fran shook her head dourly. ‘He denies it, of course. Poor girl fell three flights, cracked her head open on the paving slabs below. Blood everywhere, awful sight it was. She looked like a little broken rag doll according to Mrs Wilkinson who works at the chemist. She was coming back from walking her dog. Said she’d never had such a shock in her life. Heard her landing, apparently. There was a dull thud and then—’
‘Fran!’ Noticing Nicky wiping quietly at the tears streaming down her cheeks, Emily pulled Fran up sharply. Could the woman not just exercise a little restraint, for goodness’ sake?
‘But couldn’t she have just fallen?’ Sally whispered.
‘Not according to the neighbours,’ Fran whispered back, her eyes flicking to Emily as she did. ‘They had a violent argument, so I heard. He was in a terrible state when he was here, I gather. Bordering on violence, then, according to …’
God. Emily gritted her teeth as they whispered on. The village drums had obviously gone into overdrive. Refraining from saying anything further, for fear she might tell Fran exactly what she thought of her, and also possibly Sally, she smiled tentatively at Jake as he approached. ‘Would you like a coffee or tea?’ she asked him, having noticed that he’d swilled back two cups of water and had another in his hand.
‘No.’ Jake smiled shortly. ‘Thanks.’ Loosening his tie, he turned to address everyone gathered. The shadows under his eyes were darker, Emily noticed. He looked bone-weary with exhaustion.
‘I gather you all know about Zoe Miller?’ he asked, surveying them each individually.
‘We do. Fran’s furnished us with details, should any of us have been wondering,’ Tom answered, a despairing edge to his voice. Fran glanced down, looking flustered and upset, which was surprising. Emily had always considered she must have a very thick skin, since she generally didn’t appear to care what people thought of her gossip-mongering.
‘You can hardly blame people for talking,’ she muttered tetchily at length. ‘Everyone’s wondering what on earth’s going on, where the information is coming from. Fern Jessop is worried to death about her old mum learning about her muscular sclerosis diagnosis. Says it will be enough to give her a heart attack.’
‘People are cancelling appointments,’ Nicky chipped in, her voice a frightened whisper as she glanced worriedly at Jake.
Jake tugged in a breath. ‘Right.’ He nodded tersely. ‘In case any of you weren’t aware, Dean Miller was here earlier. Distraught I think understates the mood he was in.’
‘Fit to murder someone, he was,’ Fran interjected, addressing no one in particular. ‘From what I heard, his language was—’
‘I’m not sure that’s helpful, Fran.’ Shooting her a warning glance this time, Tom cut her short. Emily noted Fran’s cheeks flushing and the peeved look she gave him, at which Tom looked away uncomfortably.
‘From his conversation with me,’ Jake went on, clearly working to control his emotions, ‘it was obvious that he’d learned certain upsetting information.’
Uneasy glances were exchanged as he paused again, allowing people to digest this.
‘Personal medical information regarding his wife that was given to me in strictest confidence, as is all patient information,’ he went on, with another agitated intake of breath. ‘I spoke with Zoe Miller shortly before the tragedy and established that she hadn’t divulged that information to anyone else. It seems clear, therefore, that it could only have come from here.’ Stopping, he glanced again at everyone in turn, causing people to shift awkwardly.
‘I won’t say who it concerns, but it’s also pretty damn clear that other patients’ details have been accessed too.’
He was talking about Natasha. Emily felt her cheeks flush.
‘Whether these details have been leaked inadvertently or deliberately, in what I can only assume is some kind of spiteful act of revenge, obviously has to be ascertained,’ he continued. ‘The police have informed me they will need to talk to me. I imagine they will want to talk to each of you individually too. It goes without saying that if anyone here is responsible for what is basically a flagrant disregard for data protection, for whatever reason, then it might be a good idea to come and see me … or Tom,’ he added, almost as an afterthought, ‘before that happens.’
Nicky gasped openly at that, her eyes pivoting towards Emily, her expression a combination of bewildered and horribly guilty.
‘You’re placing yourself above blame, then?’ Fran asked in the
ensuing silence. She was possibly the only person who would dare to challenge Jake on this, since she didn’t have access to files or systems. Which didn’t actually mean she hadn’t had access to patient information. Emily had caught her peering at the computer screens on many an occasion as she fussed about, cleaning, which was one of the reasons she was so despairing of Nicky’s lackadaisical attitude. God only knew what information Fran had become privy to, poking around in the various offices – especially Tom’s, which she spent a disproportionate amount of time in.
‘Fran …’ Tom sighed, his tone now one of utter despair.
‘I’m just saying,’ Fran retorted. ‘Just because you’re both doctors doesn’t mean you’re beyond reproach, does it?’
Eyeing the ceiling, Tom sighed again and shook his head.
‘No, Fran, it doesn’t,’ Jake answered for him. ‘To be frank, though, as a doctors’ surgery, where patient confidentiality should be our absolute priority, I think we all have a certain amount of responsibility to bear. Certainly in making sure this sort of thing never happens again.’
‘I agree,’ Sally piped up. ‘It’s absolutely dreadful. I can hardly believe it. And you actually spoke to her before … Poor you,’ she said, locking tearful eyes on him. ‘If you need me to do anything, Jake, you only need to ask, you know that.’
Like offer him a shoulder. Despite the awfulness of the situation, Emily couldn’t help feeling immensely annoyed, particularly when Jake glanced awkwardly down and back. Of course, if she read anything into that, she would be being paranoid.
‘Right, that’s it for now,’ he said. ‘We’ll clearly have to look at overhauling our systems and tightening protocol. Meanwhile, if anyone needs to speak to me, I’ll be here for a few hours this evening.’ He looked meaningfully at Emily. ‘And I’ll be in early tomorrow morning.’
‘Can I have a quick word now, Jake?’ Tom asked, as people made moves to leave.
Trust Me: An absolutely gripping and unputdownable psychological thriller Page 12
