‘I’m impressed,’ Jake said, looking actually concerned. Also looking at her, Emily noticed.
‘Meanwhile,’ Regan continued, ‘we were just about to ask your husband if anyone else has access to the surgery, apart from staff and patients and the usual people who come and go obviously – delivery people, sales reps and so on. Family, possibly?’ she asked. ‘Do any of the staff bring their children in?’
Emily felt her nerves tighten all over again.
‘Just us,’ Jake provided, now looking as wary as Emily felt. ‘My daughter, Millie, sometimes comes in with me on a Saturday. She’s aiming to do a veterinary course. She finds the environment more conducive to study,’ he explained. ‘My son, Ben, has been in on the odd occasion, but only to meet up with one of us.’
‘And do they have boyfriends or girlfriends who might have come in with them?’ the woman asked.
Emily glanced at Jake. She could see his apprehension as his eyes as swivelled to hers. No doubt his mind was on Millie and the concerns Emily had raised about her boyfriend before their conversation degenerated into another argument.
‘No,’ he said adamantly. ‘Never. Ben’s not seeing anyone. And Millie is only recently in a relationship.’
‘That’s fine,’ Regan said. ‘If you could let us have the boyfriend’s address, though …’
‘Yes, right.’ Jake’s eyes flicked uncertainly again towards Emily. ‘I’ll, er, have a word with Millie.’
Regan studied him thoughtfully for a second. ‘You understand that due to the serious consequences resulting from the circulation of these letters we do have to talk to anyone who might have had access to the building?’ she asked.
‘Of course.’ Jake ran a hand over his neck. ‘Not a problem.’
Emily could see from his tense body language that his thinking was on a par with hers, about this at least. They knew nothing about Millie’s boyfriend, other than that he was older than her and that Millie was reluctant to divulge more about him. From the very nature of that fact, their daughter was bound to be questioned in detail about him.
‘Right, well, I think that’s it for now.’ DS Regan checked her watch. ‘We’re off to have another word with Dean Miller. We’ll—’
‘How is he?’ Emily asked. His life had been ripped apart. Whatever happened to him now, he would never recover from any of that.
‘As well as can be expected,’ DS Regan answered. ‘We’re still making enquiries.’
‘He claimed he wasn’t involved – when he spoke to me on the phone,’ Jake said. ‘I know you can’t give out information, but …’ Pausing, he drew in a breath. He was obviously as concerned as Emily was. Probably more so. Knowing how much he cared about his patients, she didn’t doubt that. ‘I don’t suppose it counts for much, but I believed him.’
Nodding, DS Regan looked between them, then seemed to make a judgement call. ‘There’s a neighbour who claims to have seen Zoe on the balcony after Dean left. She also thinks someone else might have called on her. As I say, we’re still investigating. It would help him if Zoe were able to tell us, of course.’ She glanced questioningly back to Jake.
‘They’re hopeful,’ he said, his expression one of obvious relief, on Dean’s behalf, Emily guessed. ‘They’ve managed to minimise the swelling.’
‘Excellent. Fingers crossed.’ DS Regan smiled. ‘We’ll be back in an hour or so to set up in the office you mentioned, if that’s okay?’
‘I’ll let the team know.’ Jake offered her a small smile as he walked them out.
Emily turned to go too. She desperately wanted to talk to Jake. The problem was, she wasn’t sure they knew how to talk any more.
‘Emily, can I have a word?’ He stopped her as she approached the door. Glancing into the corridor, he closed it behind him, and turned back to her. ‘Have you spoken to Millie? Is she back?’
Emily could see the worry in his eyes. He had so many things coming at him, he wouldn’t know which way to turn. He would have turned to her, not so long ago. And she to him. She was tempted to say, You remember you have a daughter then?, but refrained. The pain he was causing her was excruciating – she felt as if her heart was tearing apart inside her – but she didn’t want to hurt him back. ‘She texted me,’ she said. ‘She said she’d be back later.’
Closing his eyes, Jake nodded. His relief this time was palpable. He loved his daughter. Ben, too. She could never do anything to damage his relationship with them. She couldn’t lie for him, though, either. He must know that.
‘But she still hasn’t given you any information about the boyfriend?’ he asked hopefully.
Emily shook her head. ‘She’ll have to if the police need to know, though, won’t she?’ She desperately didn’t want Millie dragged into any of this, but she was beginning to think it might be a blessing in disguise if she was forced to disclose more information about the man, such as who he was and where he lived. Emily needed to know. She needed to protect her daughter. The cold foreboding in the pit of her stomach told her she did.
Jake nodded. ‘She won’t have much choice,’ he said, searching her eyes, a kaleidoscope of emotion in his own: confusion, despair, frustration.
‘I’d better get on and make sure Tom’s office is available for Sally to use.’ Emily moved towards the door. She couldn’t stand here, so close to the man she loved, with this vast space between them. The man who once would have soothed away her worries with soft kisses, whose comforting embrace around her would have made her feel safe. She’d thought he was her rock, that he would catch her if ever she fell. And now … Did he realise she was clinging on by her fingernails? Would he be there if she let go?
‘Emily, wait.’ He stepped towards her. ‘There’s something else,’ he said, a flicker of hesitation in his eyes.
She looked at him cautiously.
‘I tried to talk to you about it last night. Clumsily, stupidly. I wasn’t thinking straight. I was tired, overwrought after what happened with Jennifer Wheeler. And then when we argued, I …’ He faltered, kneaded his forehead and looked back at her. ‘I need you to take another blood test,’ he announced.
She stared at him, stunned. ‘You’re not serious?’ She struggled to get the words past the constriction in her throat.
Jake locked his gaze on hers. ‘Deadly.’
‘A drugs test?’ She felt every sinew in her body tighten. ‘You actually think that I’m self-medicating? Writing out my own prescriptions? Or am I stealing drugs from the safe, Jake, is that it?’
‘Emily …’ He glanced over his shoulder. ‘Please just hear me out.’
Clearly he was worried the police might overhear. Let them. He was insane. Or else he really was trying to drive her insane. Emily had heard enough.
‘Let me past, Jake,’ she said, sure that the contempt in her eyes must be obvious. She didn’t care. What was it he wanted? For her to attempt suicide? Tears welling up so fast they almost choked her, she tried to step round him.
‘Emily, don’t.’ He caught hold of her arms. ‘Just listen to me, will you?’
He was keeping his voice low. So she would be seen as the volatile, drugged-up, aggressive one? ‘Let me go.’ She tried to pull away. Whatever she’d done, she wouldn’t stay here to be tortured by him.
‘Jesus! Listen to me.’ Jake only held her tighter. ‘If you’re not self-medicating, someone is feeding you these drugs, do you understand?’
Emily stopped struggling, blinked uncomprehendingly at him.
‘Amphetamines.’ His face was pale, his eyes fearful. ‘You’re being poisoned, Emily. You have to take another blood test.’
Twenty-Nine
‘There’s no way I’m letting Sally take my blood,’ Emily said, looking shakily at Jake over the glass of water he’d fetched her. She half expected him to say Why? or It’s not Sally, such was his propensity to jump to the woman’s defence.
But he didn’t. Nodding instead, he reached to relieve her of the glass, placed it on the table and went to
collect the appropriate equipment to take the specimen himself.
‘Who would do such a thing?’ she asked him as he helped bare her arm and attached the tourniquet, all of which he did calmly and efficiently.
You? she wondered, icy fingers tugging at her heart as she noticed the taut set of his jaw, the small tic playing agitatedly at his cheek. Might he be capable of it? The notion was absurd – she must truly be going mad. He would hardly have told her about it if it was him. Then who? She couldn’t believe anyone would do something so terrifyingly wicked.
Jake met her gaze as she studied him, her mind ticking frantically in tandem with her heartbeat. He would be desperate to hold onto all that he’d worked so hard for here. Was it possible that there really was a whole other side to him she’d been too blind to see before? Some part of him that had been so badly damaged by the trauma of his mother’s death and the role his father had played in it that he couldn’t bear the thought that in the end he had turned out to be a chip off the old block?
‘You’re wrong about me, Emily,’ he said quietly after a second, his look intense, his ocean-coloured eyes growing a shade darker.
It was as if he was reading her mind. Emily looked away while he searched for a suitable vein. She was going mad. Her thoughts were firing scattergun through her mind – because of the drugs? Someone was trying to poison her. He was trying to help her, not kill her. He’d never been anything but caring and gentle and kind. This was the man who’d cried openly, tears of wonderment, when he’d first cradled his newborn baby daughter in his arms. What was the matter with her?
She squeezed her eyes closed as he inserted the needle. He wasn’t going to hurt her. She knew he wasn’t. But still she couldn’t look.
‘All done,’ he said, pressing a gauze gently to her arm.
Emily looked up at him, a tight lump rising in her throat that she couldn’t seem to swallow.
Jake gave her a small, reassuring smile and turned to fill an empty vial with the sample he’d taken. ‘In answer to your question, I have no idea who would do such a thing,’ he said. ‘Excluding anyone at home,’ he glanced pointedly back at her, as if he really had heard the ridiculous ramblings of her mind, ‘my thinking is that it has to be someone here.’
Sally?
‘It would have to be someone you see on a regular basis,’ he continued.
Sally. Emily’s blood ran cold. She didn’t see anyone else on a regular basis. Certainly not anyone she regularly drank or ate with.
‘In answer to your other question …’ He turned back to her.
Emily looked at him, confused. Had she asked another question?
‘The one that’s eating away at you,’ Jake clarified. ‘I’m not cheating on you, Emily. I love you. Sadly, I can’t seem to make you believe it, but I do.’
He held her gaze, such palpable sadness now in his eyes, it tore another hole in her heart. She had no idea what to say. She wanted to believe him, to bring a stop to all of this and just hold him, be held by him; she longed for that, but … the email. The intimacy between him and Sally. She hadn’t imagined it. Wasn’t imagining it, however addled her mind was. It was a fact that he hadn’t told her about his relationship with Sally. As much as she wanted to, she couldn’t believe it had just slipped his mind. She hadn’t imagined his involvement with someone else years ago either. No matter how innocent he’d claimed it was, the fact was, he had been seeing another woman.
‘Can we talk?’ he asked her, his expression hopeful. ‘Calmly, rather than arguing?’
They had to. They couldn’t go on like this. For the sake of Millie and Ben – for their own sakes – they needed to try to communicate amicably, whatever the future might hold. That thought causing her heart to wrench afresh, Emily closed her eyes and answered him with a small nod. She was about to ask him if he could come home early when there was a knock on the door and Nicky peered in.
‘Sorry to bother you,’ she said, her eyes gliding curiously between them. ‘It’s just that I need the keys to Tom’s filing cabinet. I have some notes to type up for him and I need to cross-check an address.’
‘Yes, of course. Sorry.’ Realising the keys were still in her bag, which actually they shouldn’t be, Emily got to her feet.
Jake smiled ruefully as she passed him. ‘I have to pop out to take a sample to the hospital,’ he said, nodding towards the vial of blood he’d just taken from Emily. ‘We still have that patient treatment plan we need to discuss, though. We’ll talk later, yes?’
‘Okay.’ Reading between the lines, Emily nodded. He was taking the sample personally. He’d clearly guessed that she might be concerned if he didn’t. Managing a small smile back, she followed Nicky out.
Once in reception, she found her bag and the keys therein, handed them to Nicky and, reminding her to sign the file out, braced herself to face Sally. There were two patients due in for blood tests immediately after lunch, she recalled, thankful that her brain seemed to be functioning on some level. With the police due back and a full evening surgery ahead, they needed to get organised. People were scared. They would need reassuring. Emily was determined to offer that reassurance, whatever rumours might be flying around. Also to be the epitome of efficiency. The person responsible for all this wanted her to fall apart, for her life to fall apart, just as the lives of the recipients of the letters had. They wanted things at the practice to fall apart, for which Jake would then blame her. Emily had decided she would die before she allowed that to happen – although, she pondered, given how seriously the other victims were suffering, perhaps that was the intended outcome.
Was it her? Seeing Sally appear from the treatment room, looking as attractive and immaculate as ever, she gave her a guarded look. Was she the one who was drugging her? Sending out those disgusting letters? It had to be the same person.
‘Ah, at last.’ Sally beamed and hurried towards her. ‘I was wondering where you’d got to. Do you fancy a quick cuppa?’
‘No,’ Emily said, panic hitting her as the reality of being slowly poisoned sank in. ‘I’ve not long had one, thanks,’ she added quickly, not wanting to alert Sally to the fact that she knew she was being fed drugs. She wasn’t likely to catch her in the act if she did that.
‘Oh, right.’ Sally eyed her curiously. ‘Not to worry, I didn’t really want one anyway. I’ve been peeing all morning as it is.’
Emily eyed her curiously in turn as Sally came around to hook an arm through hers. ‘I wanted to let you know I’ve confirmed the sixties band for Ed’s birthday bash. I hope that’s okay?’
‘Yes, fine,’ Emily said, feeling slightly derailed by her friendliness. Also relieved, she conceded, that Sally appeared to be acting perfectly normally, chatty and bubbly as always.
‘Brilliant.’ Sally nodded, pleased. ‘I thought with it only being a week away it might be better to grab them rather than relying on Dave to DJ. Don’t get me wrong, he’s good – until he’s on his third pint, at least – but I thought it would be nice to make things a bit special for Ed and Joyce. He does so much for the village, after all.’
Listening to her friend, who, for all her tittle-tattling, was still the caring person she’d thought she was, Emily swallowed back the lump of guilt lodged in her throat. She’d been wrong about Sally. Wrong about Jake. She’d played right into the hands of the psychopath who’d sent the email and those vile letters. It seemed almost as if they’d known she would. As if they really knew her and the insecurity she felt; her deep-rooted belief that no matter how many times Jake told her he loved her, he couldn’t possibly. She’d lived in fear that one day he would find out her secret and realise that whatever feelings he had for her were misplaced. She still felt that fear.
Her mind went to Kara and the plaintive look in her eyes when she’d reached out to her in her dream; she was sure her sister had been trying to convey a warning. She thought of the man she’d loved in her youth, who had reciprocated with the worst kind of twisted love that became control. Even now
, she could remember clearly and with a cold dread his parting words to her. ‘I know you, Emily! I fucking love you!’ he’d shouted, right there in the courtroom, his face contorted with rage as they’d tried to lead him away. ‘I’ll find you, I’m warning you. You belong to me!’
‘So, how are you?’ Sally asked, snapping her back to the present. ‘I called you last night, but your phone went to voicemail.’
‘Yes, sorry.’ Emily drew in a breath, attempting to banish her demons from her head. ‘I felt a bit off colour, so I grabbed an early night.’
‘Oh no.’ Turning to face her, Sally blinked at her sympathetically. ‘But you’re all right now?’
‘Fine.’ She mustered a smile. ‘It’s just a virus I can’t seem to shake off, I think. How’s things with you?’
‘Well …’ Blushing, Sally glanced down and back. ‘I wasn’t going to say anything yet, but … we’re expecting a happy event.’
Emily stared at her, cold foreboding clutching her stomach.
‘I’m pregnant,’ Sally announced, and waited.
Emily reeled with a mixture of fear and confusion. Jake had categorically denied that the text had anything to do with him or Sally. He’d been seething with anger that she would think it did. Yet here Sally was announcing that she was pregnant. ‘Congratulations,’ she managed. ‘I bet you’re thrilled to bits.’
‘I am.’ Sally smiled excitedly. ‘It wasn’t planned, but now that I’m getting used to the idea, I’m over the moon. Dave is, too. Mind you, he’s a big kid himself. He’s probably out shopping now for Lego or footballs or something.’
‘Really?’ Emily’s heart thrashed wildly against her chest. ‘That’s very decent of him … under the circumstances,’ she said, and watched her friend’s face slowly blanch.
‘What circumstances?’ Sally murmured, eyeing her warily.
Emily said nothing. Nausea swilling inside her again as she wondered whether she was horribly wrong, whether she was truly going insane or whether the lies she was being told were designed to make her think that she was, she turned and walked away.
Trust Me: An absolutely gripping and unputdownable psychological thriller Page 19
