by Jack Parker
Camdon and I fell asleep against each other, and I briefly was aware that Dylan and Marcus came back, watching T.V. and doing something. But I was comfortable, sleeping lightly against Camdon, until my phone went off. I grumbled and ignored it.
"That thing is so frickin loud." Camdon complained. "Where is it?"
"I don't know." I said, still half asleep. "Answer it. Or hang up. Something."
Camdon reached into the side of the chair and pulled it out. "Hello?"
I heard a murmur on the other line but Camdon was completely silent. I turned my head and looked up at him, his face was completely white. "It's Tom." He whispered.
I pulled the phone from his grasp, as he sat there in silent shock. "Hey." I said into the phone, kind of irritated that he was upsetting Camdon, even if it was unintentional.
"Did you ask those boys about Camdon?" Tom asked, loud enough that Camdon heard. I felt his body tense against mine.
"Can I talk to you about this later?" I told him.
"Just say yes or no, is he doing okay?"
"Yes, he's doing fine. I'll call you with any news." I hung up the phone, turning it off. I watched Camdon, "Are you okay?"
"I just talked to my dad." He said. "This is so weird. I can't deal with this." He shook his head.
I held his face in my hands, "Of course you can." Whenever Camdon gets really bothered about something, he checks out of reality for a little bit. He grows quiet, and you can tell he's over thinking everything. For the rest of the day, Dylan and I were too aware of how quiet he was. He seemed to be totally lost in thought. We spent the whole day in the water, boogy boarding and laying in the sand, but it was hard to relax when Camdon was tearing himself to pieces, trying to decide what to do.
We all headed back to the condo late that night, after roasting marshmallows and having a little campfire. We were tired and all retreated to the different corners of our rooms.
I looked at my phone as Tom called again. I sighed, and pressed ignore. Camdon came and walked through my door, laying down beside me. He rested his head on my stomach, and I absentmindedly played with his hair.
"If you were in my position, what would you do?" He asked me.
I contemplated what to say to him, knowing he was in such a tormented state, "I know what I would want to do, but I honestly have no idea if that would have changed or not. I didn't grow up with a single mom raising me, and I never had to see her sacrifice so much for me. I never felt the way you feel about your father, and I don't think I'm the best person to…reference for this." I shrugged, even though he couldn't see it. "We've had totally different situations. It's easy for me to say one thing, but I have no idea what it's really like to be in your position."
"So?" He said, relaxing into me as I continued to play with his hair. "Just tell me what you would do, or how it would have played out, if this were you."
I sighed. "Well, from my standpoint, I'd be dead curious. I would have probably googled his name a hundred times to try and find him. I would want to see him, if anything, to curse him for being such a douche bag. But I don't know… I think a part of me would really want to know what he's like, if I was anything like him, if he liked the same foods, or music. If I had any half-brothers or sisters, I would have a lot of questions I would want answered."
"Do I have any other siblings?" Camdon asked.
"Not that I know of. He once said that he had a serious girlfriend, but she left him because he didn't want to be married." I frowned, trying to remember, "Or something like that."
"Go figure." Camdon scoffed. "I do want to know about him. For awhile now, I didn't, but I had come to terms with the idea that I would never know who he was, or what he looked like. I used to imagine walking into a room, and him being there, and having no idea that the person sitting next to me was my dad."
"Trust me, this guy is your dad. You're eye color is the same. You look more like Jill though, I think. But the resemblance is more than apparent."
"Thanks. I love being told I look like a girl." Camdon chuckled. "Are our eyes really the same? Do they hypnotize you like mine do?" He grinned deviously, getting up to turn around and look at me, fixing me with his stare.
I hate it when he does this. He does it on purpose, because he knows how much I find his eyes interesting. "No." I smiled at him, unable to look away. "I always thought it was the color of your eyes, but may be its something else."
Camdon looked a little bit confused, but kind of relieved. I don't think he liked the idea of me staring at his flighty dad the way I always looked at him. "Like what?"
"Like… maybe its you. Maybe it's because you're you."
The smile on his face was genuine, "Thank you," He murmured, as he kissed me.
"Do you think I should talk to him?" Camdon asked.
"I think you should do whatever you want to do." Camdon sighed at my response and stared at the ceiling, still trying to figure out his life.
Chapter 21
I slid out from under Camdon's sleeping form to walk into the kitchen. I was hungry, and couldn't wait any longer. I stopped by Marcus and Dylan's rooms, but they were both asleep, it had gotten pretty late. I pulled open the fridge, and took out everything I needed to make a sandwich.
"You don't get up as quiet as you think you do." A voice said from behind me. I jumped, startled, but Camdon wrapped his arms around me. "Sorry," He laughed, "I didn't mean to scare you." He kissed my cheek and pulled me into him.
I took deep breaths and tried to slow down the pounding in my heart. My hands were shaking so bad I had to put down the turkey and lettuce I was holding. I turned around to face Camdon, smiling, "No worries, I'm just a little jumpy." But the look he gave me was intense, as if he was trying to see something through me. "What?" I asked him, as he took my hands in his to steady them.
"Do they always do this?" He asked quietly, frowning.
"Um… my hands? I told you I'm jumpy. You remember that." They were finally starting to settle in his warm grip.
"Is that because of what happened to you?" I froze up, and this did not go unnoticed by Camdon who tugged on my hands lightly, pulling me back to him, I hadn't realized I had stepped away.
"I guess so." I said, steadying my voice. "Just a normal reaction now, it's actually gotten a lot better."
"I am sorry for how I acted, I didn't realize how serious your situation was." He turned his head, as if he couldn't even bear to look at me. "I was too caught up in how I was feeling, I wasn't thinking straight."
"It's okay." I looked at the ground, hating to talk about our stupid fight.
"No it's not. When I saw you on the news, I felt like such a dick. I left you when you needed me most." He scoffed, "I guess that runs in the family." I frowned at him, to let him know I didn't think that, "What ever happened to those people that did that to you?"
"They're still on trial. I'm not sure when it will be over. I hope soon, I used to go everyday, but it got to be too much. I want to put it behind me. I hated having the pressure of testifying, they needed it to link them to a bunch of other crimes-" I shook my head, "I'm glad my part's over."
"Was testifying that bad?" He frowned.
"It was hard, but it wasn't that bad. It was having to do practice questions and to tell so many people what happened over and over again. I was tired of reliving it, that's why I didn't do any interviews. It sucks, to have to describe in detail everything about one of the most painful moments I've had. And to have to do it for an audience… it's like a game to them. The whole court system. I hated it." I shrugged, "I just felt played."
Camdon reached out to tuck my hair behind my ears, "Heidi…"
There was a knock at the door that interrupted us. I looked at the clock, "Who would stop by the condo at eleven at night?" I asked out-loud. I immediately went pale.
"What?" Camdon asked.
"It's probably your dad. He and his friends are usually down at the beach for awhile, and he stops by afterwards." I stepped away from Camdon an
d walked for the door. "That little shit. I told him he wasn't allowed to come around here, I'm going to kick him in the-"
"Wait." Camdon held onto my arm. He looked extremely panicked, his eyes wide.
"I'll make him go away, don't worry," I kissed him.
"No. I want to see him." He shook slightly.
"Are you sure?" I asked, as Tom knocked on the door again.
Camdon nodded, "Yeah, I want to see him, I want to see if he recognizes me. I can't not… with him only a couple feet away…"
"Okay." I squeezed his hand and Camdon went back to the kitchen, hopping up on the counter. I yanked open my door, and glared at Tom's tall form. Camdon wasn't nearly as tall as the former footballer, but their lean muscular bodies were among the same type.
"Heidi!" He said in relief, stepping in and enveloping me in a tight hug.
"Let go of me." I grumbled.
"You haven't answered your phone." He returned my glare after his warm welcome.
"That's because you called like a psycho." I folded my arms across my chest.
"Of course I did, you're staying here with two boys and no supervision. I'm going to call and check in on you. I can't believe your parents are letting you do this."
"They think Dylan is a girl and Marcus is gay." I explained.
"You shouldn't lie to them." He frowned.
"What are you doing? Practicing for future parenthood or something?" I grumbled.
He grinned, "Hopefully. Where are they anyways?"
"Sleeping." I told him.
"Ah. I see." Tom stood there, in his swim trunks and wife beater. He looked extremely young. He could definitely pass for under thirty. His sun-bleached blonde hair and blue eyes shone merrily against his tan skin.
"Oh. Um. Hey Tom?" I turned back to the kitchen where Camdon shrugged, watching us, as if to say, 'why not?'
"Hmm?" He asked, looking down at me.
"I have something to show you. But you have to behave. Or I'll kick your ass out faster than you can say parental abandonment."
He frowned at my joke, but ignored it, and smirked, "You'll kick my ass? You, the little girl who's probably drunk, since that's all you seem to do here?"
"Actually," I defended myself, "I didn't drink today, and I'm 5'5. So suck it." I rolled my eyes, "Anyways. It's in the kitchen. Oh, and you can't be mad, or too gushy either."
"What?" He laughed, following me as we walked through the kitchen door. Camdon sat on the counter tops, leaning against a cabinet. I hopped up next to him, and he took one of my hands, caressing my thumb.
Camdon looked up at his father, his face as if it was made of stone. No emotions shone through it. It was odd, because Camdon was always so happy and smiled all the time. I hadn't liked how somber he had been looking lately.
But Tom wasn't so bad, I had realized over the past couple days. Annoying, yes, but I understood where he was coming from. He finally felt connected to his past that he wanted to get back. He really did love Camdon, I could tell. He was friendly, and handsome, and charming. Not unlike Camdon in that respect. But as he entered into the kitchen, and saw Camdon, I think it threw him for a loop, he no longer held that flashy smile, that was slightly manipulative and conniving, with a hint of humor and intrigue.
Interesting.
Camdon didn't say anything, but Tom stared at him, his eyes widening, and looked at our connected hands then at me.
"Is this-Is this Camdon?" His wide eyes asked me, pointing to Camdon.
"Ask him yourself." I smiled encouragingly.
Camdon watched us curiously. I leaned into him, whispering into his ear, "He's harmless," I kissed his cheek, "You guys should talk alone." At this he clutched my hand tighter, shaking his head. I sighed, but stayed.
"Hi." Tom said nervously, adding in a wave. I laughed unintentionally.
"Way to be, Tom." I told him. "Act like you haven't been calling me everyday to ask about him. Well, here he is."
Camdon glared at me at this. "Sorry," I mouthed to him.
"So… you guys got back together." Tom said.
"How much did you tell him?" Camdon continued to fix me with his stern stare. I felt like I was going to be scolded later.
"I had to explain to him how I knew you." I ignored his question, giving him instead a general answer.
"Yeah…. That was interesting." Tom chuckled nervously, "You sure know how to pick 'em. I think she was on the verge of attacking me when I ran into her and she-" Tom shifted uncomfortably. "She put… things together."
"I was not 'on the verge of attacking you' " I rolled my eyes.
"If I remember correctly, you made me cry." Tom stared at me pointedly, hanging me out to dry. "More than cry, I was a blubbering mess, I didn't eat or sleep. I was pretty much inconsolable, all because a seventeen year old redhead bitched me out."
I didn't have red hair. I was no fire crotch. It's strawberry blonde. Get it right. But I didn't get to say anything because Camdon started laughing. "You made him cry?" He started clapping. "Oh classic." He laughed some more. "I love you." He kissed my cheek.
Tom was not as happy with Camdon's response, you could tell he was hurt. "You guys should go sit on the couch." I nudged him, trying to make him take this seriously.
"No, no." Camdon shook his head, finally calming down. "I'm fine here." He looked at Tom, "So I hear you're interested in me?"
I tried to pull away from Camdon, but he looked at me with pleading eyes. "Interested doesn't really cover it." Tom said darkly.
"I don't understand, why, if I'm so damn interesting, you never bothered to find me. To, I don't know, send me a birthday card." Tom flushed a deep red. Camdon shook his head, "You don't even know my birthday do you?"
"No." Tom said quietly.
"It's September 17th." Camdon said. "And I'll be expecting more than a card."
Tom looked up at him, hopeful, and I slide away from him, Camdon finally feeling comfortable enough to let me go. I walked out of the kitchen, and moved passed Marcus' door, where he was snoring lightly, and onto Dylan's.
I entered in and shut the door, coming to lay down next to him. "Dylan." I whispered.
Dylan moved, and grumbled something in coherent. "Dylan," I tried again, and shook him.
"What?" He said grumpily, his face completely smushed into the bed.
"Camdon is talking to his dad right now." I said, not being able to contain the giant smile that spread across my face.
Dylan's eyes snapped open, "Are you serious? Where?"
I giggled happily. "In the kitchen."
"Here?" Dylan looked shocked.
"Yeah." I smiled proudly, nodding in conformation.
"Cool." Dylan said in approval. "Now leave me alone-I'm trying to sleep."
I glared at him. "Who else am I supposed to celebrate with?"
"Go wake up Marcus." Dylan had already laid his head back down, and was drifting off to sleep.
"Are you kidding me? He would do something crazy." I sighed at Dylan's form. "Fine." I grumbled, and left his room to be antsy and wait on my bed.
At first, I was anxious, pacing around the room, but eventually, the night seemed to seep into me, and tiredness overcame my body. I tried waiting for Camdon, but I felt like the talk was going to be a long one, and ended up drifting off to sleep.
I was gently awoken by Camdon shaking me. "Hey, Tom wants to go say goodbye."
I felt like I was still asleep as Camdon led me towards the front room, where Tom was standing in front of the door.
"Hey." He smiled at me. I looked at the clock to notice that it was approaching 4 am. I was still coming to terms that I was awake, so I didn't speak, just gave him a slightly delirious smile.
"He's…" Tom struggled to find the words, searching his head. "Not what I expected."
"What do you mean?" I felt a defensive edge creep up from inside of me.
"He's nice." Tom shrugged, "He actually gave me the time of day. I don't know, he's just different. Doesn't trust me worth a
lick though."
I raised my eyebrows, "What did you expect?"
Tom just shrugged again. "I thought… that maybe we would fight a little bit, and bond or something. I realize its not going to be that simple, but I thought that if I got a chance to explain myself, maybe it wouldn't be the same."
"Is it the same?" I asked him.
"I'm not sure. That kid's hard to read. He's courteous and everything, but I feel like I wasn't getting the real thing."
"Why do you say that?" I frowned, trying to figure out what was going on in his head.
"Something about the way he was acting around you. It was different than the way he was around me, and I mean obviously, you're his girlfriend." I smiled at his words, "But he kind of put up a wall."
"It's not just you he does that too. You have to understand, he's the center of a lot of town gossip. I think he feels a lot of pressure, because everyone talks about him and Jill and everything that happened between you guys. And you can't expect him to be okay with everything. Especially not right away."
