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Paper Dolls [Book Two]

Page 9

by Emma Chamberlain


  I’d spent a week thinking about Olivia and our relationship. I’d made no space to keep my mom in my thoughts other than to errantly wonder if she was doing okay. Today, I’d have to go home and find out how much damage was done but I had a secondary reason. I needed to talk to her, to tell her about Olivia and let them meet. If anyone could make my dad see it was her.

  The thought gave me hope. Enough that I was too antsy to keep lying still. I finally moved my leg out from under Olivia and watched as my own personal goddess stirred. She looked like a classical work of art anyway. Her jawline was perfection, running sharp and defined on a perfect angle. Her face was perfectly symmetrical. Perfect eyebrows and her skin was alive and smooth.

  I scooted until I could lean in and hover over her jaw, kissing along the surface and up onto her cheek. Her eyes fluttered open and her lips curved into a smile. There was a vivid awareness about her, even upon waking. Like she had known I was ruminating on her beauty.

  “It’s not fair that you look this good in the morning,” I said.

  I watched her stretch and look at me. I took in a long breath and let it out, stretching my legs and curling my feet around her calves. I rustled my crazy bed hair and imagined the dark circles under my eyes from stress. “I know I look like shit.”

  “Why would you even say that?” She laughed. “You’re effortlessly beautiful Avery, like, all the time. It takes all my willpower not to constantly be touching you.”

  “That first part is not true but I will accept it because you mentioned touching me and I never argue when that possibility is on the table.”

  “You say possibility, I say uncontrollable constant.”

  I took her hand from underneath the covers and brought it up to my chest, placing it right on my breast. “There that’s better.” I grinned at her and giggled.

  “You know I mean more than that,” she teased.

  “Ohhhhhh, right!” I took her hand again and started to lower it back under the covers but she stopped me. “What?” I drew back, feigning surprise. “You know when we’re married I’ll immediately become less attractive and you’ll wish you had touched me more when we were engaged,” I teased back.

  “On the contrary, I think when we finally get married you’ll be officially mine by law and that will turn me on way more than you’d think.” She smiled, raising an eyebrow and challenging me again.

  “So, owning me by law makes you horny for me.” I nodded and scrunched my eyebrows, considering. “I’m okay with this. As long as you feed me regularly.”

  “Of course I’ll feed you. I want to use you,” she pushed.

  “Better and better.” I stopped, pretending to think. “Use me for sex or for menial labor? Because one of those I’m not on board with.”

  “Oh…” She pretended to have a dilemma on her hands. “But… I thought if you married me you’d have to do what I want?” When she looked up she pretended to be concerned and confused.

  “This is a two way street, Princess.” I got right in her face and looked at her with narrowed eyes. “You’re just as much mine as I am yours. That means you have to do what I want too.” I backed away and looked away. “We may have a problem on our hands. A battle of wills if you.. will.”

  “Jokes on you,” she said defiantly, rolling out of bed and standing up with her back to me now. “I already want you to use me. I didn’t need a ring to want that.” She walked to the window and looked out.

  It was strange having her so naked with the daylight streaming in through the windows of her room. “Getting serious now,” I said, amused by her turn of direction. “I’d rather love and appreciate you. Like right now I’m appreciating how perfect your butt is.”

  It was perfect but my musings were more on the artistic qualities of her body.

  “Oh really?” She asked, turning slowly to face me and taking the two steps back to her bed. She put her hands down and crawled across it width-wise before laying back down, this time ontop of the covers. She’d placed her butt as close to me as she could without actually having it touch me.

  She knew I’d want to touch. I swallowed, my tongue peeking out to wet my lips. With one hand I traced the curve of her hip and dipped down to the curve of her butt, coming back up to her waist where I splayed my fingers, gripping her and pulling her closer. “You’re dangerous and I love it.”

  “Go ahead,” she sighed sexily, pushing her butt back just a bit to overwhelmingly tease me. “Worship me,” she challenged.

  “Yes, my goddess,” I intoned. I moved to spoon her, taking my hand to the front of her body. I pushed my fingers between her breasts and then back around to tease her everywhere but her nipple. “You know, I have thought of you as a goddess. Like a classic Greek goddess but my own personal one.”

  Her breath hitched and I let go of her breast to drag my fingers in feather-light touches along her stomach and around her waist. “I do worship you.”

  “Mmmm,” she hummed. I’d taken her breath away for a second there. She took my hand in hers and forced me to slowly keep touching her.

  “I’ll be Medusa just so long as you’re my Guinevere,” she had to clear her throat just to speak, she was having a hard time finding air. “The things you do to me mess me up. I feel like King Arthur just praying you’ll dain to love me enough.”

  “You’re no Medusa. More like Athena but if you want you can be my queen. I’d like that. I’d be a very good consort.”

  I liked this, talking about ourselves in the perspective of ancient love stories. I parted her legs with one of mine and reached down, stopping just short of touching. “May I enter, Queen Olivia?”

  “You’re more a devil than a lover,” she said, pushing me to touch her and then moaning as I did. “A queen like me can be easily manipulated. I’d have to banish you if I knew what was good.”

  “I wouldn’t blame you. I am awfully troublesome,” I whispered into her ear, while exploring her folds with aching slowness.

  “But I’m awfully cute and useful for moments like this.” I pressed down into her opening, only pressing the tips of two fingers in. “I’d say it’s in your interest to keep me in your court.” After swirling my fingers in her wetness I pressed into her, closing my eyes as her warmth took me in.

  “You’re amazing,” I purred. She threw her head back at the instant pressure and accidentally moaned right into my ear. I shivered and withdrew, no longer able to take not tasting her.

  I flipped her body and crawled down until I could settle between her legs, taking care to spread them a little further to accommodate my body between. I didn’t tease. We were past that. My hands wrapped around her legs from underneath, drawing her near, opening her to me.

  With a decisive tongue I went to work, finding out what made her squirm and what made her still. I wanted to map her so I could revisit in different orders. Play her like a new song over and over until I got the chords in the right places.

  I swirled my tongue up and then down to her opening, entering her, loving the confines of her body. I wanted more, to do this forever but she started to make the little noises that meant that she was close. I’d already become accustomed to them. I wanted to stretch it out so I slowed myself down, taking time to lick her in every direction I could.

  But she was too ready for me and I couldn’t stretch her anymore. As she came I sucked at her, making her get a little louder as she went. At last, she breathed my name and collapsed onto the bed, but I didn’t want it to be over so I kept touching her with my tongue, testing to make sure she was okay.

  She didn’t stop me so I circled her clit and then released her leg so I could bring my right hand down. I entered her with two fingers and she jumped, sensitive from before. I smiled into her body, knowing that I could get her to orgasam again if I hit the spot I’d found before.

  I fucked her slowly, letting her get used to feeling me there, taking her back up the roller coaster one link at a time. This time the stakes were hirer, she was already soaring
. Then when she wasn’t anticipating, I quickened my pace and changed the angle, curving my fingers around. She bucked under me but I kept it up. Her body shuddered with impending release. I took her right over the edge, twisting inside of her and speeding up the action of my tongue.

  Her hands were in my hair, trying not to pull. She’d been gasping little-by-little, her stomach sucking in and in as she tensed and changed with my touches. I felt a need in her, a desperation. She was whining like a small exhausted animal. As soon as I hit the right spot her whole body tensed and froze, her fast airy gasps turned into one loud pain-filled moan that I couldn’t stop if I fucking tried.

  I’d pushed enough to push her over and now she was trying her damndest to let herself come down.

  “Avery, fuck,” she rasped out, still gasping quickly and trying to let go of the feeling or let herself fully process it.

  I licked my lips and withdrew from her, crawling up the bed and laying next to her. “Yes, my queen?”

  She reached for me and pulled me in, kissing me all sloppy and desperate. All the while whining and pulling me into her just the same until I laughed and she pushed me off.

  “Evil,” she groaned, laying on her back completely undone. She seemed upset but in a good way. Her eyes were closed and she was still trying to find enough air.

  “I can’t help it. I was born this way.” I licked my fingers until there were no traces of her, sad when the taste was all gone.

  After a few seconds she rolled over onto her front, burried her face in her comforter and moaned.

  “Oh wow, it wasn’t that good, was it?” I teased her.

  She moaned again into the covers and kicked her feet.

  “Now, now… There’s no need to kick me out of bed.” I grabbed the comforter and slipped under. I was chilly from the fan and now that we were still all the warmth had gone.

  We were both quiet. Every time it was different with her but she was the same in some ways. There was always such abandon in her sounds and actions. I wondered if there was ever a time she wanted more. She had expressed that doubt to me about herself but I’d never thought of it the other way around.

  “Hey, you’d tell me if you wanted me to do anything… Else, when we have sex, right?”

  “You’re too good at what you do,” she panted, finally settling enough to allow speech. “But yes, I’m sure I would,” she said.

  She kept letting out little moans even though I’d long since finished getting her to where she wanted to be. It was like she felt aftershocks, small residual quakes.

  I rolled over and put my hands to her face, watching her recover. When I kissed her she moved her tongue along my lips, tasting herself on me.

  “I don’t deserve you,” she said again. She was always saying that, always. “You’re too good.”

  “I’m no better than you.” I sighed and tried to figure out what I felt when she said these things so I wouldn’t over react. “We’re just the right amount of broken for each other. So, we can fix each other up and make life a little easier and a lot better if we’re together.” I pinned her in my gaze, half smiling. “Does that make sense?”

  “It does. But you’re wrong,” she smiled, a light open adoring smile I wasn’t used to seeing, not from her or anyone. “You’re better than me and I don’t care if you don’t think that’s true.” She turned her gaze up to her ceiling and rolled her eyes back into her head, holding her head with her hands. She still hadn’t recovered.

  A knock came at the door.

  “Olivia? Your father and I are going out. Sorry we can’t have that talk today.We’ll probably be out til late.”

  I assumed it was her mother.

  “That’s okay,” she said, sounding all stern for a second. There was a bit of an angry tilt to her tone and I had felt her body jerk at the initial knock and then the voice right after.

  Silence hung in the air.

  My hand was over my heart. I’d nearly jumped out of my skin when the knock sounded. I could tell her mom was waiting just outside the door. What I couldn’t tell was what I was missing.

  “Have fun,” Olivia said.

  “We’ll try,” her mom laughed skeptically.

  That was all it took. We both heard footsteps and I could physically feel Olivia relaxing by my side.

  She rolled onto her side away from me and tucked her knees up into herself, holding her face in her hands.

  “Hey, c’mere.” I reached over with both hands to pull her to me. Sometimes it helped to be strong. She went limp and let me drag her into my body. “What talk?” I was wondering if that was the source of her discomfort or if it was just that her parents were idiots.

  “I sort of freaked out on her last night…” Olivia said. “I was so close to just telling her but she shut me down. She always does when I show any sign that I’m a real human with real feelings and real wants. She actually told me that I was tired, that I had a long day, and that we should sleep on it.”

  “Oh.” We had both been abandoned in different ways. Her parents were here but they didn't know her, didn’t want to even. They only cared about the image and how she fit into their mold.

  “I don’t usually fight with them,” she said. “I’m usually quiet. I usually obey without question. I’ve gotten used to hiding my opinions. My anger.”

  “Are they even going to believe you when you tell them?” I could tell that they were forever putting words into her mouth. “We can wait. You know I’d wait forever.” Dramatic, yes, but true.

  “They won’t. No,” she said. “They’ll think I’m kidding first. But if I persist they might have to actually address me. Oh Avery, it’s just a disaster. I can’t talk to them about anything. They’re too wrapped up in their own imaginary world. They don’t see me as a person. They really don’t. The first thing she talked to me about last night was Brian. My mom actually told me that she thought I had everything figured out, that I was grown. I’d told her how upset I was that she didn’t even ask me about my trip or call me while we were gone. She basically said she knew I didn’t need her. What the hell is that?! How is that just something you say to your daughter? I mean, it’s fucking true but still.”

  I tightened my arms around her. “Sounds like she doesn’t have an idea what a parent is or what they’re supposed to do for their children. She’s probably always treated you like a tiny adult when you were younger and now you’re all grown and she doesn’t see what she did.”

  “I just hate it,” she said. “And my dad’s worse because he only sees me as a girl. Irrational, small, nearly pointless, all the things I already feel, and then worse, a woman who should be kept by some level-headed man. Like maybe all of this was just for marriage, just to make sure some man would want to have me.”

  “And when you marry me their heads will explode.”

  “When I marry you I won’t be fucking thinking about them anymore. What they want of me. What they would want me to do. I want you. You’re the only thing I’ve ever wanted for myself.”

  I kissed the back of her neck and left my lips there, feeling her warm skin. “If they find out will it affect your college plans?” I just wanted to know what we were in store for. We hadn’t even talked about when we wanted to get married.

  “I have a full-ride to Stanford so it shouldn’t… But they have connections, they could probably nix the whole deal if they were really mad. They’ve known I’ve had my heart set on Stanford for some time. Either way though, I have back-ups and I already know I’m overqualified for most jobs, let alone colleges. I just can’t see them doing that. My mom already railed at getting me to change my major. I made a deal with her. I told her if she let me do Literature as my major I’d go on to Graduate Studies and at least try my hand at going into Criminal Law… It was a compromise. We had a very long talk and I hadn’t expected it. I’m still kind of wondering if she was just being emotional while drunk. It’s impossible to know. The odd thing is I would’ve loved to have gone into the Biomedical f
ield. My father fiercely discouraged it and made me feel diseased for even wanting to touch the idea in the first place. In the end I chose Literature because Stanford liked this one paper I had published and they actually came to me with the offer without my even trying to apply for that particular field. For once I was sure that this particular offer had nothing to do with my parents. It excited me really. I’ve always loved to read and write. With my parents though...” Olivia sighed, going back into that. “There really is no pleasing them. They both want different things from me. They make it impossible. No matter what I do I’m put down and shamed. I can never win. Last night in the kitchen I could hear my mom talking about all my little mistakes in Chopin’s Nocturnes, talking about why I had to quit music and how I knew that I would never be good enough to really excel, it was such bullshit. This is the woman who basically told me I had to play after giving me crap for playing when I wanted to.” She let out an even deeper sigh. “I’m sorry. It’s just not easy to explain.”

  “No, you’re doing fine explaining. I’m sorry they pull you all over the place for their own desires instead of just loving you for who you are. I’m sorry you didn’t have real parents growing up.” At least I’d had that until three years ago. I wanted to protect her from the world. I’d shield her from everything if I could but she was a fighter too in some respects. She could take them on herself. Maybe I’d just stand beside her and fight with her instead of for her.

  “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to but I want to hear it. Knowing what you went through, are going through, makes me love you more. You turned out pretty damn well for having two Machiavelli-s for parents. And I want to hear you play again. Just for me.”

  She smiled and rolled her eyes to look over at me.

  Slowly she pulled herself away and off of the bed.

  “Come on,” she said, taking my hand and pulling me up.

  She walked us into her closet and let go of me. I watched her pull a dress from a hanger and throw it on with nothing beneath. Her hair was all voluminous and extra wavy since she’d slept on wet hair, it was kind of adorable, and definitely hard to ignore.

 

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