by Fiona Faris
Helena waved her hand at him and gently chided him, “Brodie, you cannot go blaming yourself for this. You could not have anticipated Frances being there, waiting to attack. She’s likely just overwhelmed with all that has happened. I am sure she is fine. Her body likely is just reaching out and claiming the rest it needs.” Brodie nodded but was not sure if he believed her. Helena walked over to Beatrice and ran a finger over her forehead. She let out a small sigh.
“I think she will be well. You wait and see, Brodie.” Helena put a hand onto her growing belly and sat on Beatrice’s bed.
“Thank ye, Helena, I appreciate it.” Helena was a good woman. He had long grown to value all that she added to the castle just by being there. His brother had married a fine woman, and he knew they were a match made in heaven. Brodie thought how Beatrice made him feel, and he knew he felt towards her much the way Marcus felt towards Helena. He needed to let his feelings out, to hear from another woman.
“Helena, dae ye mind if I speak tae ye about Beatrice?”
“Oh, Brodie, you never have to ask. I’m always here for you.” She smiled and reached over to give his knee a soft pat.
“Helena, I’m vary much in love with Beatrice. I cannae fathom a day withou’ her in me life. Today, when she fainted, as I carried her here, I worried greatly about what might happen if I’m nae around—or worse, what life might be like if she dinnae want me around. I’m worried about losing her, Helena, truly worried.”
Helena could feel her eyes sting with tears as Brodie confessed how strongly he felt about her dear friend. She knew from early on that the two were a great match. Beatrice needed someone to care for her, someone who would consistently put her first in life, and she knew Brodie was that kind of a man.
“Brodie, you romantic. I can see how deeply you care for her. There is not much I can say to comfort you. It is easy to be worried about all that may happen when you care deeply for someone. All I can say is that I know Beatrice. She’s my best friend. I see the way she looks at you, the way she is with you. I know she loves you. But I think it’s time you both admit to each other exactly how much you care for each other. You need to show her in a new way how much you love her.” Helena spoke gently, encouraging Brodie’s openness.
After the lad was silent for a short while, she stood to leave.
“I’m going to head to the kitchen. I’ll have the staff bring up some tea for you, and some refreshments. I’ll tell them to keep an eye on Beatrice and to bring her food the minute she is awake. As for you, Brodie, you need to take care of yourself, too. I know I cannot pull you from her bedside, but be sure to eat some food and drink some tea. Your nerves are not going to do you any favors. You remember that, all right?”
“Thank ye, Helena. I shall eat some food and have some tea. Ye are right, as well, about the other things. I dinnae ken if I have been as open and honest as I can be with Beatrice. I need tae tell her just how afraid I am of losing her. And maybe I do need tae journey tae England for a short while, just tae see she is okay. But it will be her decision.”
Helena smiled at Brodie and nodded. She turned away from the two of them and left for the kitchen.
Just as Helena left Beatrice’s bedroom, the doctor arrived. Brodie looked relieved to see him, and moved aside to allow the doctor to check on Beatrice. He placed his bag on the rocking chair and started by checking her pulse. He nodded to himself as Brodie impatiently waited to hear his diagnosis.
“Her pulse seems tae be doin’ just fine. Tis a bit strong actually, fer someone unconscious. Tis a good sign, though.”
Brodie smiled and felt hopeful for the first time in what seemed like days.
Next, the doctor leaned in to listen to Beatrice’s breathing.
“She does naught seem tae have any issue breathing. She sounds peaceful.”
Brodie nodded, “Aye, I was just thinkin’ she looks mightae rested and at peace considerin’ all she’s been through lately.”
The doctor agreed. “She feels a bit warm, but nothing far from the ordinary.” The doctor stepped away from the bed and placed everything back in his bag. He looked at Brodie's worried face and patted him on the shoulder.
“Aye, lad, I dinnae think ye have anythin’ tae worry about. The lassie seems tae be doin’ just fine.”
“But, if she’s doin’ just fine, why did she faint?”
“I dinnae ken. All I can say is she sounds and looks mightae healthy, actually. My only guess is that her body has suffered a great deal of stress over the last few weeks. This lassie has been through a storm and back withou’ anything to guard against the waters. Ye ken? Her body is likely demandin’ the rest it shouldhae gotten long ago.”
The doctor started to walk out of the room. “I think the lassie will be just fine, as fer right now, she just needs some rest. I’ll have a betta’ idea when she wakes. She may just need tae sleep it of fer now. But send fer me when she rises, no matta the time. Alrigh’ lad?” The doctor nodded before he turned and left the room.
Brodie sat back down in the rocking chair he had grown so familiar with over the last couple of weeks. His shoulders pressed into the curve of the wood, and he winced. It wasn’t until that moment that he realized how tired his body actually was. Beatrice was very light, but still, carrying her from the clearing in the forest had caused his muscles to ache, especially given how quickly he had moved. The doctor’s words should have eased his mind, but they did little. Still, Brodie knew he had one of the best doctors in the country on his side, and if the doctor said Beatrice sounded well, then he could relax a touch.
Brodie began to rock back and forth on the chair, and leaned back and closed his eyes. As he did, images of Beatrice flooded his mind. Beatrice and her long falling dark curls, the way those curls laid across the pillow at the inn, across the pillow in his room. How, after she had fallen asleep, he reached across and twirled a single curl in his finger. He took a deep breath and breathed her in, the blueberry, honey, and lavender scent of her skin. That scent haunted him the whole time he had been away from her.
But more than her beautiful curls and scent, Beatrice’s soul made him ache. She was a being of pure light and love, someone so full of care and strength, a woman he would be proud to be associated with for the rest of his life.
Brodie moved his chair closer to Beatrice and brushed her hair back from her face. She slept peacefully on, her lips only slightly parted. As he stroked her hair, he began to sing a lullaby he had often sung to Padraig. It was a Celtic lullaby passed down through his family: I stand below the moon, and its soft white glow, lay on my bed and let my heartbeat slow, and in the span of the night, I only see the moon’s light, reaching, reaching, reaching like the wind whistling goodnight.
Even as he sang the lyrics, he felt his own heart beating slowly, and his mind begin to ease. The song always reminded him of his mother, a strong woman much like Beatrice, who did not let any secrets get past her. She, too could have slain a man with her own hands. Though his father was a strong man, Brodie had been raised to be the man he was because of his strong mother. His own father admitted many times that his mother was the reason he was such a great leader. Seeing the love between his father and mother so long ago taught him all he needed to know about true love. The best kind of love was forged through honesty, bravery, vulnerability, trust—and constant reminders of love. Brodie’s father always showed his appreciation and care, showed his deep love for his mother. He knew he had found a similar love with Beatrice, and he didn’t want to lose it so soon after finding it.
Even though the doctor assured him Beatrice was fine, he knew he would not be happy until he saw her wake. When she woke up, he would be there and would tell her all he had held back from saying. He knew then what he would do when she awoke. As he thought about her beautiful smiling face, Brodie felt his eyes close as he rocked on the chair, back and forth, back and forth, singing himself the lullaby.
* * *
“This is absolutely the most delicious
thing I have eaten in a long time. Thank you, dear, for bringing me another bowl, and the biscuits.”
Brodie stirred from his deep sleep in the rocking chair. The voice caught him off guard at first. Then it hit him all at once. He jumped up quickly and opened his eyes.
“Beatrice, yer up!” he shouted, stepping quickly over to her bed and planting kisses all along her face.
“Yes, Brodie, of course I am, and while I normally enjoy your kisses, I’m absolutely ravenous right now and would like to finish this bowl of grains.” Brodie chuckled and stepped back to sit in the chair. He watched as Beatrice ate large spoonful after large spoonful.
“How long was I unconscious?”
“Since yesterday afternoon. We were all ratha’ worried about ye. The doctor said ye were alrigh’, but still, we fretted.”
“Well, yes, that is rather a long time. No wonder I’m famished.” Beatrice continued eating and took a long sip of her tea.
“Speakin’ of the doctor, I’ll send someone tae fetch him. He would like tae see ye as soon as he can. He wants tae get a good look at ye now that yer up.” Brodie stood from the rocking chair and walked over to the bedroom door and shouted to one of his servants to run and get the doctor, or to leave a note in his study if he wasn’t present.
Returning to Beatrice. Brodie placed his hand against her cheek to feel for any fever. She seemed to be doing just fine.
“How are ye feelin, lass’?”
“Honestly, I feel fine really, I am very exhausted. My body is, anyway. It feels as if I’ve been carrying baskets of bricks on my arms. But other than that, I’m just ravenous, which can be expected since I slept for so many hours.” Beatrice smiled and offered a piece of biscuit to Brodie, who took it gratefully and popped it in his mouth.
“Dae ye remember what happened, lassie?” Brodie asked as he ran his thumb along Beatrice’s cheekbones.
Beatrice stilled for a moment, and her eyes looked thoughtful. Then suddenly she started and laughed as if struck by the memory.
“My goodness, yes—that dreadful cousin, Frances. Tis one of the most frightening moments of my life, but Brodie, also one of the most thrilling! I cannot believe I fought him off. I never would have done that!” Beatrice shouted excitedly, which made Brodie laugh.
“Well, thrillin’ is one way tae describe it. Ye launched a large stone at the land without a secon’ thought. As if ye had no fear in the world.” Brodie kept chuckling, proud of Beatrice and her ferocious spirit. “I have never seen a braver person than you in the forest.”
“I think I just realized that I was tired of being the weak person everyone seems to think I am. I love Helena, truly I do, but even she brought me here in part because she thought I wasn’t coping on my own. And it’s true that after James’ death, I let myself fall apart somewhat. Sure, I took care of my responsibilities, but aside from that, I forgot all the passion I hold inside. I forgot how strong I truly am, even in my suffering.” Beatrice smiled as her eyes shimmered with tears.
“Well, I think yer brave, lassie, and more than that, I think yer mightae strong.” Brodie reached over and held her hand. The time had come to talk to Beatrice about how he truly felt. He needed to be straightforward and tell her just how much he loved her, and was ready to be vulnerable and brave as she had been.
“Beatrice, I have more I need tae speak tae ye about. And I ken ye just woke up, but I think tis time I was more honest with you. Are ye alright tae talk?”
Beatrice took a deep breath and set aside her tray of food and tea. She turned back to Brodie and held his hand.
“Yes, I think so.” She could not deny that her heart fluttered like a nervous sparrow. What if Brodie was going to tell her he was done with her, done with the idea of them together? Maybe he realized it was too difficult to be with her, especially given how much time they would need to be apart so early in their relationship. But Beatrice had promised herself she would be brave and face things. It was better than living numb and excluded from all that happened in the world outside of her castle.
As much as she had suffered in the last few months, she had also found the parts of herself she had lost. She had discovered a whole new exciting world. She was much stronger than she could have imagined herself to be. If Brodie were going to leave her now, she would survive, even if it would cause her a great deal of pain. Maybe their love was only meant to last a short while.
She resolved to stay strong as she had been lately. “You can talk to me about anything, Brodie.” Even if it is a conversation of separation, she thought to herself.
Brodie licked his lips and lifted one hand to rub the scruff growing along his chin and jaw.
“Beatrice, fer as long as I’ve known ye, I have wanted tae be near ye. The night I met ye, all I wanted tae dae was care for ye, protect ye, and even then ye proved yerself tae be much stronger than I could believe of ye.”
“Oh, Brodie, I have found myself drawn to you since the moment I met you too. It’s why I left without saying goodbye, I couldn’t bear to part from you. It was selfish, I know, but I am sure I have loved you since the moment we met.” She reached up one hand to stroke his jaw.
“I, Beatrice, I cannae live withou’ ye. I dinnae want tae be apart from ye. Ye are the love of my life, and I cannae imagine a day where yer nay by me side.” Brodie shuffled awkwardly on the bed, sliding off and falling to one knee.
“Beatrice, if ye’ll have me, I want tae be the man ye fall asleep next tae every night. I want tae be the smile that greets ye, the eyes that see ye in the early mornin’. Beatrice, I love ye, and I want tae know if ye’ll have me as yer husband. I havenae ring tae give ye yet, but I promise tae get ye one if ye’ll wear it.” Brodie held Beatrice’s hand and pressed his lips to her fingers, feeling her silken skin against his mouth.
“Brodie, are you, are you asking me to marry you?” Beatrice looked still somewhat confused, but also thrilled at the prospect.
“Aye, Beatrice, tis what I’m askin’. An’ if we need tae be in England half the year, well, I’ll join ye. If ye want tae live here, so be it. Where ever ye go, Bea, tis where I’ll be.” Brodie looked more nervous now than when he had started speaking. Beatrice pulled him by the hand and leaned off the bed towards him, pressing her lips against his.
As the realization that Brodie had just proposed dawned on Beatrice, she thought back to their relationship. Since their meeting, she found herself unable to resist the pull towards him. Regardless of how often she tried to ignore her feelings or guilt herself into thinking she was not fit for those feelings, she still could not deny them. Beatrice had spent so many of her last years in guilt, in punishment, in the place of endless responsibilities, when, in fact, it was time for her to go after what she most wanted. Brodie made her feel more alive in ways she had long forgotten were possible. There was no one else she wanted by her side.
She did have her duties as a duchess, but she would find a way to make it work. If they needed to divide their time until they decide what was best, they would do it. Whatever the case, she was tired of trying to find reasons why this couldn’t e. She was deserving of this passionate love that she had found. The serendipity of their meeting could not be denied. Even if she hadn’t been robbed, she would have met Brodie here in Scotland, anyways. There was no denying the gods had deemed them necessary for each other. Even though her heart would always ache for James, she knew this love was the one she was destined for.
“Brodie, of course I’ll marry you,” Beatrice said finally. Brodie jumped up quickly and pulled Beatrice against him, leaning in to kiss her more passionately. Beatrice gave in to his kiss and let herself melt in his arms.
“We will find a way to make it all work, but I’m ready to say yes to life again, Brodie. You helped me remember who I once was and who I want to be again.”
“Oh Beatrice, my lavender beauty, ye are the greatest joy in me life now, and I cannae wai’ tae spend the rest of me life with ye.” Brodie continued pressing his lips al
l along Beatrice’s face, enjoying the knowledge that he would be able to continue doing that for the rest of his life.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Brodie and Beatrice held each other, celebrating their newfound commitment, when Helena walked into the room. Beatrice, as was her sensitive nature, was tearful with wet-streaked cheeks—but this time, she was crying from happiness.
“Beatrice, you’re awake! My goodness, I’ve been so worried about you?” Helena made her way to Beatrice’s bedside and pulled her close for a hug. She squeezed her best friend with all the strength she had.
“Helena, thank you so much for all your care.” She smiled as she wiped away the tears.
“What is it? What’s got you crying?” Helena asked, looking between Beatrice and Brodie.
