by Raina Wilde
Josh scooted toward her and gently tucked a strand of hair behind her shoulder. Afterward, his hand remained to cup her neck, his thumb rubbing distracting circles on her cheek.
Josh leaned forward and pressed his forehead against her own. Lori closed her eyes and did not pull away. How could his touch feel so good and so wrong at the same time? She wanted it, but she was not supposed to. Her brain knew that but her heart was not listening.
“Lori, tell me what I did wrong. ” He whispered.
She held back the tears that were threatening to flow. Did he honestly think that he had done something wrong? Had he thought that the entire time?
She shook her head. “Nothing. ” She whispered. That was as much as she could trust herself to say.
She felt his hand beneath her chin and her face was raised so that their lips met once more. This time, the kiss was tender and sweet.
“Come to the wedding with me. ” He spoke against her lips.
“I am going to the wedding. ” She replied. They broke apart and Josh took one of her hands in his own.
“Come to the wedding as my date. The rehearsal dinner too. ” She felt a gentle squeeze on her hand.
“Josh, I can’t. ” She sighed.
“Why? ” He asked. “Ashley won’t care. She’s too happy having you back around to complain about me stealing some of your attention. Come with me. ”
Lori laughed. He made it all sound so simple.
“It’s not a good idea. ” She was trying to stay firm but the goofy grin on his handsome face was making it difficult. How could he be so utterly happy when all she felt was as if she were about to be sick. Kissing Josh had just made everything much more complicated. She should have kept her distance.
Even now, though, she knew that staying away from Josh was practically impossible.
“Lori, I promise, if you never want to see me again after the wedding, I will leave you alone. ” She could see the determination in his face. He was not going to give up until she said yes.
Lori rubbed her temple. Two dates with Josh and he would promise to stay away forever. That was what she wanted, wasn’t it?
With a deep sigh, Lori agreed. She only hoped that she could go through with it and come out unscathed. No matter how she tried to rationalize it, Lori was certain that she was on the fast track to a broken heart.
Chapter 8
The next evening, Josh was sitting at a local bar sharing drinks with his buddies when he had the sudden urge to leave. All evening women had been throwing themselves at him. Apparently a recent magazine article had labeled him the country’s hunkiest bachelor and, upon finding out that he was in town, the women had come out in droves.
All except Lori, that is.
He had called her to ask if she wanted to go to dinner that night but she had refused. She had rushed through the phone call and hung up without much explanation. She had seemed distracted. He hoped that she was not regretting her decision to attend the wedding events as his date.
When he felt a pair of fingers sweep through his hair for the third time that night he knew that it was time to leave. This was not where he wanted to be. He wanted to see Lori.
She was all that he had been able to think about since coming into town. Hell, even before that, but after kissing her the day before he knew that he was a goner.
There had never been anyone for him except Lori. Somehow, he needed to prove to her that they were meant to be together. Even though she said that she was not interested, her actions had told him otherwise. There was no denying the passion that flowed between them. Lori might not want to admit it, but it was right there at the surface every time that they met.
On a whim, perhaps fueled by alcohol, Josh decided to go to Lori’s apartment. He needed to see her, to feel her, to know that she was not going to change her mind and run away from him again.
The door to the apartment building was locked. Even if it had not been, he had no idea which unit belonged to her. He decided to throw caution to the wind and call for her. By the time he had shouted her name four times, half the building was awake.
Lori stepped out onto a second-floor balcony and stared down to where he stood in the grass.
“Josh! Go away!” She was attempting to keep her voice down. One of the neighbors shouted for them to be quiet, while another female offered to let Josh into her own apartment.
“Lori, let me up. ” He stood beneath her balcony and spoke as quietly as possible.
“Are you drunk? ” She hissed.
“Yup. ” He smiled. “I just wanted to talk to you. ”
Lori had a look of panic on her face that Josh did not understand.
“Go away, Josh. We can talk tomorrow. ” She rolled her eyes in frustration.
Josh evaluated the situation and made the only decision that seemed appropriate at the time. He scaled the side of the building until he was able to pull himself up over the edge of Lori’s balcony.
There she stood wrapped in a silk bathrobe with her arms crossed over her chest and a look of pure agony on her face.
He wasted no time. He walked over to her, grabbed her by the shoulders, and kissed her.
After a moment he pulled away but continued to hold her.
“Madison Stone, I am in love with you. I know that…” He never got to finish the thought because a moment later a small voice piped up behind him and he felt as if the floor had fallen out from beneath him.
“Mommy? Is that a burger-leer? ”
Lori instantly took control. That was a good thing because Josh stood frozen after he turned to face the small blonde-haired girl who was the spitting image of Lori.
“No honey. This isn’t a burglar. It’s just an old friend. ” She shuffled the tiny girl back inside and Josh could still hear Lori talking. “Let’s get you back in bed, sweetie. ”
“I love you, mommy. ” The tiny voice was already yawning.
“I love you too, Emmy. Sweet dreams. ”
When Lori came back out onto the balcony she did not speak.
“I didn’t know you had a daughter. ” He stated dumbly.
“Well, now you do. ” Lori crossed her arms over her chest once more. She was annoyed.
“How old is she? ”
“Three”
“Is she mine? ” He asked. He held his breath as he waited for the answer. He was not sure which answer he wanted to hear.
“Don’t be silly, Josh. ” Lori stated with certainty. “We had sex once. I had plenty of partners that summer. ”
Chapter 9
Lori lay in bed for hours agonizing over the lie that she had told Josh. She could not have pretended that there had been any partners before him, he was well aware of the fact that she had been a virgin on the night of her graduation. However, there had been no lovers after him that summer. There had been no lovers since him, period.
Of course Emmy was his, but there was no way that she was going to saddle him with that information. In a few days he would be gone. Then, she could make him hold true to his promise and stay out of her life for good.
Josh was sleeping on the couch on the other side of the thin apartment wall. She had let him in after Emmy had fallen asleep, hoping that he would sleep off the stupor and leave before Emmy woke in the morning. With any luck, the tired child would not remember the incident.
She heard him roll over and groan. Heavy footsteps crossed the room and he entered the bathroom. What was he doing in the shower?
She continued to listen for a few minutes before she was certain. Yes, the man was taking a shower in the early hours of the morning, in her apartment.
She squeezed her eyes shut. That was the sort of image that she had been trying to force out of her mind. Unfortunately, her mind provided a surplus of fantasies about Josh in the shower that made her blush in the darkness.
Shortly afterward, there was a soft knock on her bedroom door.
She called for him to enter and there Josh stood looking fresh, clean,
and alert.
He entered the room and shut the door behind him.
“I just wanted to apologize for my behavior tonight. ” He whispered. He was apparently very concerned about volume now that he knew there was a child in the other room. “If I had known that you had a child I wouldn’t have… well, I wouldn’t have been so loud. ”
He sat down on the edge of the bed; his hip rested against her thigh and Lori suddenly felt flushed.
Josh gave a self-depreciating smile.
“I still would have showed up, though. I just wouldn’t have been so loud out there. ” He held her hand in his own. “Lori, we need to talk. ”
“Josh…” He pressed a finger to her lips to silence her.
“No, Lori. ” His thumb rubbed circles on her wrist. “No matter what happened tonight. I meant what I said. ”
Lori felt the tears begin to well in her eyes. No, she schooled herself, she would not give in to this ridiculous dream. He might be here for the weekend, but once he left she would be stuck picking up all of the shattered pieces of her life. And he would leave. She knew enough about his reputation to be certain of that.
“Tell me the truth. ” He whispered.
Lori shook her head. She did not know which truth he was asking for, but it did not matter. She had so many truths that she was unwilling to share.
“Just answer one question. ” He pleaded. “Alright, maybe two. ”
Lori’s laugh was combined with a strangled sob.
“When you told me that what we had meant nothing… did you mean it? ”
The silence rang between them for what felt like ages. Slowly, Lori shook her head.
Josh breathed a sigh of relief, as if that answer meant everything to him.
“Was there something that I did to push you away? Was there something I could have done different? ” His voice was full of emotion now. They both understood the weight of these questions.
“That is too many questions. ” Lori attempted to distract him with humor.
“Answer the question, Lori. ”
“No. ” She answered and a lone tear slipped down her cheek.
“To which question? ” He asked for clarification.
“Both. ” Her answer was brutal, but true. It had not been his fault, but no matter what he had done she would have still made the same choice. She had been protecting his future, at the risk of her own, and that was a decision that she refused to regret.
“Do you still care for me? ”
When Lori nodded, she knew that all hope was lost. She had given her heart to Josh a long time ago and even now, all these years later, she could not resist him.
She could not remember how it had happened, but somehow, suddenly, Josh was kissing her with all of the pent up emotion that they had both been hiding for so many years.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled herself against him. The real truth was that she wanted this time with him, even if it only lasted one night.
Josh’s hands roamed over her body and she felt a shiver run through her skin. Lori deepened their kiss and cried out against his mouth when Josh’s hand came to settle over one aching breast.
She had secretly dreamed about this night for years. She had imagined that they would make, slow passionate love until the sun came up. Now that it was really happening, she realized that slow was not an option. She wanted him. Now.
Lori’s hands moved to Josh’s waste and hastily began pulling at his shirt. Eventually, she succeeded in pulling it over his head, where it was tossed somewhere into the far shadows of the room.
The moment that he was free, Josh’s mouth was back on hers. Lori smiled against him. She whispered his name and pulled the sheets back to let him in. He hastily discarded the rest of his clothing before slipping beneath the covers.
They lay down beside each other and reveled in the feel of each other’s bodies. Josh was even more muscular than his college self, Lori realized. He, on the other hand, seemed completely fascinated with the gentle curve of her hips and swell of her breasts, which were fuller than they last time they had made love.
She wanted to feel his hands on her skin, so she pressed herself against his hand to communicate her need. He peeled the oversized t-shirt and cotton underwear off of her with a skill that only Josh could have mastered. Then, his mouth made its journey over her chin and down her neck to where it came to rest over one hardened peak.
As his mouth worked against her breast, Josh wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled their hips firmly together. What Lori felt made her gasp with pleasure. She shifted her hips against him, which resulted in a low, masculine chuckle from the man beside her.
He was toying with her, and it was working. She was so wound up that she was afraid that she might snap at any moment. She curled her fingers into his hair and pressed herself against him once more.
He started to murmur something against her skin, but she cut him off.
“If you don’t hurry up, you are going back to the couch. ” She practically growled.
Josh raised his head to hover over hers and smiled down at the only woman that he had ever cared about.
“You’re getting bossier with age!” He teased, only to have her wrap her leg around his waist and coax him to lay above her.
He had been trying to mask his excitement by prolonging the event. He did not want to scare Lori away by appearing overzealous. However, the effect of the teasing was diminished as they both felt the result of the altered position.
Josh could feel the length of him pressing against the warm center of her body. From the look in her eyes, the feeling was driving Lori wild as well.
“You were saying? ” She was staring at him with raised eyebrows, daring him to delay her pleasure any longer.
Josh covered her mouth with his own and muttered an incoherent response. Lori shifted her legs to grant him better access and raised her hips against his once more. Josh could bear it no longer.
He eased himself inside of her and it was suddenly as if all was right in the world. He had never felt a connection like the one that he shared with Lori. This was what he had been missing. She was what he needed.
Slowly, he began to move inside of her. Lori’s hips met his every thrust and they moved together as if they had been partners all of these long years.
His breath was ragged, matching her quiet gasps and moans of pleasure, and he could tell that she was ready. When he felt the sharp bite of her fingernails as they curled into the muscles of his back, he pressed himself even further inside of her.
Lori cried out and he covered the noise with his mouth. With a driving force he carried them both over the edge and into a world of sheer bliss.
Chapter 10
The following morning Lori woke to a cold bed. Josh was gone.
She was not sure whether or not she was happy about that. Of course, his absence would mean that there would be no questions from Emmy, but at the same time, a small part of her was hurt that he would disappear into the night without a word.
That was when she heard it. The tiny tinkle of laughter that could only come from a child. Emmy was awake. Lori looked at the clock and groaned. How had she slept in? She never slept in. If anything, Emmy would wake her as soon as the little girl was up herself.
She threw on a pair of sweat pants and a tank top, pulled her hair into a messy bun, and left the room.
“Momma! We makes eggs while you sleeped. ” Josh was sitting cross-legged on the floor with Emmy in his lap and they were coloring in Emmy’s princess color-book at the coffee table.
Lori stared at the duo with wide eyes. She was sure that Josh could see the panic on her face.
“They might need to be warmed up, but there is a plate for you.” Josh’s expression was guarded. He was waiting for her reaction.
As if on autopilot, Lori went to the kitchen and collected her meal. Beside her plate was a mug of coffee. She did not know whether or not to believe that this was real. She ate her
eggs in silence, perched on the arm of the couch, while she watched Josh play with her daughter.
Emmy obviously had no qualms about the man. Lori wondered how she would explain it when he left.
“Mr. Josh said that he knew you when you was little. ” Emmy stood up to reach a crayon and her head slammed into Josh’s chin. Lori grimaced. “Sorry. ” Emmy turned with wide eyes, afraid that she had harmed her new friend.
With two tiny hands she cupped Josh’s face and kissed his chin.
“There. ” She whispered. “All better? ”
“All better. ” Josh confirmed.
Lori could not watch any longer. She slipped back into the kitchen, feeling Josh’s eyes on her back the entire time.
A few minutes later he appeared beside her. Apparently, Emmy was content to color on her own for a bit.
“I should get going. ” He stood behind her and wrapped his arms around her. Lori turned and pulled away, afraid that her daughter might walk in at any moment.
“Josh…” She began, but he stopped her with a quick kiss.
“I’ll pick you up at six for the rehearsal dinner. ” He smoothed a hand over her flyaway hair and, before she could say another word, left.
Chapter 11
Josh was picking up his tux with Wyatt, but all he had been able to think about all day was Emmy. The little girl was adorable, and very sweet. Lori had done an excellent job with her.
He could not stop thinking about what Emmy had told him. He had covertly pumped the child for information. Her age, her birthday, her family. The little girl had been straightforward and unbothered by the questions. She happily provided the information. She had also informed him that Lori was her only family.
Josh wondered why Emmy had never met Lori’s family. He had a sinking feeling that Lori’s ultra-conservative parents had disowned her after she revealed her pregnancy. It was not surprising. Lori had spent most of her childhood at the Bennett home, trying to avoid the wrath of her parents.
