“Mom, my romantic life can wait. This cannot.” Because I had chosen not to share those details about Indie with them… I held out my hand in introduction, pointing at Mr. Nose. “Please welcome Lord Ganesh.” I pointed to Mallory. “And an old friend of yours.” His eyes were glistening, and his face looked ragged with shame. No doubt feeling guilty for failing them – not saving them from death. My mother and father both smiled at him, pure joy, no accusation on their loving faces. “And my bartender. I forget his name,” I said, pointing at—
“Achilles!” Pandora shrieked, bursting into the room and literally launching her whole body at the Greek in an aerial assault. He caught her easily as she wrapped her legs around his waist and hugged him for dear life, burying her neck into his shoulder. Achilles’ scarred hand clutched her like a life preserver under her rear, and the other hand petted her hair gently. I heard him let out a deep, pleased murmur.
“Cute,” my mom whispered from beside me, watching Achilles and Pandora. She turned to Ganesh and curtsied. My dad was only a heartbeat later, bowing at the waist.
Ganesh grunted, gripping my mother’s wrist, and in a very practiced, but odd-looking motion, he kissed the back of her hand, somehow not letting his trunk get in the way. Then he traded grips with my dad, and that just made his day, because he was grinning like a kid in a candy store.
“Hey, I’m right here, too, you know,” I grouched.
My mom smiled, mussing up my hair with one hand dismissively. My dad hushed me, grabbing Ganesh’s shoulder and leading him away. My mother gave Mallory a great, big hug, and then they also walked away, speaking softly to each other. Achilles and Pandora continued whatever they were doing, some kind of weird Greek monkey hug, or something.
“Hey, minions! I’m right here! I have important things to discuss!”
Achilles grunted and simply carried Pandora away. Ganesh shrugged helplessly at me, while my dad shot me an angry glare over his shoulder, indicating sharply that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity for him to speak with Ganesh. My mom merely scowled at me with her mom vision, and continued speaking with her old friend, Mallory.
“I can’t believe this,” I muttered.
“We didn’t promise to listen to you once we got here!” Achilles called out, and then he walked through a doorway, kicking the door shut behind him. I heard Pandora giggling from behind the thick wood, which sounded suspiciously like a tickle giggle. A tiggle.
After a few minutes of standing there, alone, I very pointedly, didn’t stomp away.
Or slam a door.
Or anything else melodramatic like cursing, grumbling, or kicking walls as I meandered through my Armory, absently staring at the lethal devices all around me. And considering using them.
On my friends and family.
Chapter 22
It had been an hour, and I had marginally cooled off. Taking the time to well and truly get a feel for the Armory. Recently, I had sent Pandora off with a laundry list of things to collect, and she had brought them to me so that I could study them with my lab rats at Grimm Tech. But to be honest, I had wandered around here by myself very little in the past, always under a strictly-guided tour from Pandora. She had never left my side. And the other times I had visited, I had been under a time crunch, visiting only to speak with the guests, not peruse the stockpile.
And what a stockpile it was.
This time, I had no immediate timer. And I had no chaperones.
Which generally allowed me to be more objective. No nagging warnings, no preconceived notions from others to cloud my judgment. Of course, this also increased the risk, but I was made of hearty, wizardly knowledge.
And I was infallible.
“Right,” I muttered to myself, impaling the tiny positive-mental-attitude goblin who lived inside the deep, dark, super-black castle fortress of my soul. It was roommates with my silent love for The Sound of Music and cat memes.
But I digress.
I passed windows that revealed mountains, and then a few windows later, an ocean, despite being less than a dozen feet apart. I even saw a dark world with hundreds of albinos running around like bioluminescent fish. The Elders. I also saw a white castle on a white island surrounded by frothing white oceans. The Hatter’s White World. I stopped looking through windows after that.
My general opinion of the place had also changed. I no longer felt so conservative about the items here. Before, I had treated everything as if it was radioactive and loaded with sexually-transmitted diseases that traveled by sight. But I had seen some darker parts of the world since then. Played with some dangerous items. And squared off against some pretty powerful enemies.
In a way, it was kind of nice to walk around on my own. Without supervision. Or constant chatter. I could do what I wanted. When I wanted. Looking at what I wanted on my own terms without warnings, descriptions, or anything else. I was still cautious, but the danger factor helped clear my head, forcing me to think, rather than rely on someone else warning me if I was about to do something incredibly stupid.
Like touch…
“Don’t,” Pandora hissed beside me, slapping my forearm away with her palm.
I blinked. Then shook my head as a fog seemed to lift. I took a quick step back from the spear on the wall, staring at it in horror. “What the fuck was that?”
She patted me on the shoulder. “Some of the things can talk. Or override your thoughts. Coerce you. It’s why the Armory has a librarian. A custodian. And why you shouldn’t walk around unsupervised,” she chided.
I scowled at her, studying her cheeks. “Your face is flushed. Did you have a nice… workout?”
Her cheeks flushed a darker color, but she didn’t look embarrassed. She just smiled widely at me, neither confirming nor denying. And not acting the least bit ashamed of… whatever the two Greeks had been doing.
“Come. They are ready for you.” She studied the room, frowning thoughtfully. “I wonder how you made it this far…”
“What do you mean?”
Pandora shrugged, and clutched my hand in hers, leading me away. “Nothing, really. Just… I must have been more distracted than I thought. I usually know if someone makes it this far.”
“Must have been one hell of a distraction, then,” I grinned.
She glanced at me. “It was… long overdue.”
“Heh. Long.”
“Honestly, Nate…” she sighed, letting go of my hand and walking ahead of me.
I followed her, chuckling. At least I had gotten a little payback.
A few minutes later we were back in the room with the balcony. Achilles stood, looking out over a sandy desert.
In a fluffy pink robe. With the Artemis’ Garter hat. Like a Greek Hugh Hefner.
“Do you have no decency? This wasn’t a booty call, Heel.”
He rounded on me, frowning. “Excuse me?”
“Get your head in the game.”
“Nate!” my mother shouted. Everyone turned to glare at me.
“You can’t be serious!” I shook my head in disbelief. “I’m the bad guy here? Do none of you give a shit about anything?” I pointed at Achilles. “The bartender just banged my librarian!”
My mother gasped, glaring at me in full mom mode, and Pandora went from an astonished look to laughing harder than I had ever heard her laugh. But Ganesh saved me from the momster.
“I don’t give shits,” Ganesh said, confused. “That doesn’t seem very courteous,” he murmured to my father with a frown.
“It’s…” my dad tried to shoot me a dark look, but battled a smile as he tried to explain. “A very juvenile piece of slang. He meant that none of us seem to care about his problems.”
“Well, wouldn’t that just be a terrible existence?” Achilles smirked.
“Zip it, Achilles. Before I put you in high heels and we play dodge the arrow.”
He grumbled something under his breath, tightened his bathrobe with an angry yanking motion, and then sat on a couch. Pandora fol
lowed, still chuckling, before unabashedly sitting on his lap, squirming inappropriately. “We were sparring, Nate…”
“You shouldn’t have told him! He would’ve kept bitching,” Achilles smiled.
I blinked at them in disbelief. “Really?” They nodded, grinning like idiots. “Oh.”
“Never mind. That look alone is worth it!” Achilles laughed.
I rolled my eyes. “I have a few things to talk with everyone about—”
“Hello,” a new voice spoke from a dark corner of the room.
Everyone flinched. But Pandora just sighed, complaining about open doors under her breath.
We turned to see the impossible. Someone had entered the Armory without my approval. Without Pandora’s approval. And the level of juice pulsating from that dark section of the room was enough to end us. All of us. If the being so much as passed gas.
This just wasn’t my day.
Chapter 23
The lighting intensified to reveal a figure on an ornate leather divan. He sat there, in the middle of the couch, legs folded, and four arms displaying various mystic gestures.
Shiva. Destroyer of worlds.
“Father,” Ganesh bowed instantly, his trunk sweeping across the floor.
Pandora and Achilles untangled themselves ungracefully, almost falling off the couch before bowing and murmuring a greeting to Lord Shiva.
The interesting part was that my father, mother, and Mallory did not bow, curtsy, or speak. They merely studied the god before them with different looks on their faces. My father looked embarrassed, my mother looked eager to go bake a cake, and Mallory looked… well, cautious.
I frowned at their reactions before turning to Shiva. He didn’t seem offended by their lack of interest. “Hey, Sheeves. Where’s Toro?”
Shiva turned to me, smirking. “Nandi, you mean.”
I shrugged. “They all look the same to me. Has horns, will moo.”
His eyes tightened, and his bone-white chest seemed to grow momentarily brighter for a moment before fading back to normal. Around his bright-blue neck hung a set of rosary beads, and twined around the necklace was a living python, tongue flicking out to taste the air. A shining crescent moon centered his forehead, just above a third eye – that creeped me out. It blinked independently from the usual two. And his dreadlocks would shame any Rastafarian.
He turned to Mallory, dismissing me. “Hello, old friend.” He sniffed the air, and blinked. “You’re still masked?” His gaze shot to my parents with a curious frown. “What was your plan?” he asked himself, tapping his knee impatiently as he studied each of them. “I had hoped to finally discover your schemes…”
The room went deathly silent. I slowly turned, looking from face to face, wondering what was going on. Achilles and Pandora also looked confused. Ganesh looked uncomfortable. Not guilty, but suddenly aware that the topic Shiva was referring to was not common knowledge, and that with his ability to see futures, pasts, and read minds, he suddenly found out a whole lot more than he wanted to know. But my parents and Mallory looked downright sick to their stomachs.
“Not many know. I need to keep it that way. Especially now,” Mallory whispered, staring down at his feet.
Shiva nodded slowly. “Yes. I guess there is wisdom in that. But I do have my guesses… I even made a bet with myself. You three have been thick as thieves, and as much as it pains me to admit, I must applaud you. If I can’t even figure it out, no one will. I do wonder why, though.” His third eye suddenly pulsed with light, on his forehead, directly between the normal ones, as if he was trying to read their minds. He gave up with an annoyed sigh, waving his hand in defeat.
The three victims looked both relieved, and guilty as hell.
“Okay, Mallory just got booted off Team Temple. He is no longer allowed here. You hear that, Pandora?” I snarled.
She rolled her eyes. “Too late for that, Nate. I warned you. Once you grant someone access, they have it. Period. But at least you made them swear an oath. You could always deny him every time he asks,” she suggested.
“That.” I pointed at her animatedly. “I’m doing that.” I glared at Mallory. His shoulders slumped further at my words alone, because he was still staring at the floor.
“I’ll put him on the permanent no list, then,” Pandora said with an easy shrug.
I rounded on Shiva. “How the hell did you get in here?”
He smirked, pointing at my parents. “They needed a god’s help to accumulate so much in such a short time.” He held up a slip of paper. “Even though he apparently doesn’t trust me implicitly,” he said with an accusing frown, indicating Mallory’s secret, “your father wrote me a… Hall Pass to allow me access. Ad infinitum.” He pocketed the slip of paper. Even though he was shirtless, and I didn’t see any pockets on his pants. Maybe he stuck it in his crotch, like some women shove their phones in their bras.
I took a deep breath. Woo-sah, I murmured silently, calming myself. Ganesh nodded in approval at my gesture. We had been practicing. That, and I had watched Bad Boys II recently. But I did shoot another glare at my parents. “You could have told me Divine Intervention was involved in setting up the Armory.”
My father opened his mouth to reply, but Shiva interrupted him. “Speaking of Divine Intervention, you caused quite a ruckus at that circus.”
I blinked at him. “You helped me cause that ruckus. And it was months ago!”
He shrugged. “I may have underestimated time lines. Or miscalculated,” he added, glancing at Mallory and my parents.
I stared at him for a second, but I was unable to contain my frustration any longer than that. “What the hell are you talking about?” I all but shouted.
He frowned, the crescent on his forehead sparking, despite no light striking it. “We spoke of killing your Beast, not freeing it. Now it’s in a cane. Which is not in your Armory. Because you lost it…” he said in a low tone. “A free agent, so to speak. That and this Ichabod are all anyone is talking about up there,” he pointed at the ceiling, likely referring to the gods. This time, only his third eye moved, darting to Mallory for a brief moment.
I broke out in sweats. “Christ.”
“No. Not him.”
“No, I meant… never mind.” My mind raced. “The gods want to use Ichabod?” I asked.
Shiva grunted. “Those already awake are more curious than anything else. They don’t hunger for power. They’ve had enough war in their days. That’s a plus for you humans.” I let out a relieved breath. “But those sleeping? Yes, I imagine they want to meet the Tiny God. Most definitely. They want power. They were put to sleep for a reason. Didn’t like to share their toys.”
“That… that’s better than nothing,” I managed. It meant Ichabod had to want to wake a god, and that they weren’t currently hunting for him. “Are those sleeping all bad?” I asked.
“The majority of them, yes. But not all.” His third eye grew distant, thinking. “Well, I guess that’s relative, isn’t it?” He chuckled, slapping his knees with all four palms. “Would you rather be eaten by a bear or mauled by a pack of coyotes? Ha!”
I ignored that pleasant image. “It seems like Ichabod’s number one goal is taking out the Syndicate, so maybe we have some time.”
Shiva met my eyes with all three of his. “That must be why they took your cane, your Beast,” he shook his head, frowning at my naivety. “What man wants only a taste of power? Sooner or later, he will want to wake a god. Trust me.” And he winked.
Shit. Had I ever heard Ichabod mention waking a god? I didn’t think so.
“He really has a hard on for the Syndicate. But what the hell did they do to make him so vengeful?” I asked myself, out loud. I shot a glance at my parents, but saw absolutely no emotion on their faces. Like statues. “You two want to share with the class?” I snarled. They didn’t.
“You mean other than the whole imprisoning him with the Grimms for a few hundred years,” Ganesh answered, ever unhelpful.
“Ich
abod chose to do that. He tried to banish them. It’s his fault he got stuck in his own spell. The Syndicate didn’t cause that. This is something different. He’s unhinged. Broken.”
Shiva frowned at me. “Broken or not, we gods must take the tools provided and…” he flashed us a grin, changing the tone of his voice to that of Tim Gunn from Project Runway, “Make it work!”
Achilles clapped. “Flawless.”
That’s it. I’d had enough. I hit the Greek with a band of air on the mouth, sticking it in place so he couldn’t talk. “Children should be seen, not heard,” I smiled, anxiously anticipating his reaction. I wanted to let off some steam.
Chapter 24
His face turned purple, and if not for Pandora, we would have had a good, old-fashioned, Midwest rassle on our hands, which I would have welcomed over this conversation. But she held him back, whispering soothing words to him and easily removing the magical duct tape I had stuck to his mouth.
I turned back to Shiva with a disappointed sigh. “You know, it’s alarming what pop culture you find important enough to watch. Deadpool and Project Runway wouldn’t have been my first recommendations to get a better understanding of humans.”
Ganesh and Shiva shared a look, as if genuinely surprised to hear this. I ignored them.
“Maybe If I can keep Ichabod distracted by the Syndicate, he’ll be too busy to think about waking a god. Which may mean I need to help him bring back the Grimms…” The room went dead silent.
“That would be monumentally stupid…” my father finally said. I shut him up with a look.
“Agreed,” Shiva said, watching us intently. “You already have one Grimm. How is that working out for you?” he asked snidely.
I sneered back at him. Anyone else would have broken teeth after a comment like that.
But… they didn’t call him the Destroyer of worlds for nothing.
“Right,” I managed, grinding my teeth. “I didn’t anticipate my ex-fiancée fleecing me.”
Tiny Gods: A Nate Temple Supernatural Thriller Book 6 (The Temple Chronicles) Page 12
