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Description
Strategies for exiting a conversation.
Benefits
You will have a tactful way to exit unproductive or untimely conversation.
When to Use
Whenever you are in a conversation that you need to leave or whenever you must enter a conversation with somebody who likes to talk too much.
How to Use
Two of the easiest and most effective are:
For conversations you are already in:
Cut off + Excuse + Time limit + Tactful goodbye
“Sorry to cut you off, but I’m actually supposed to meet a friend in [number of] minutes and need to get going to get there on time. Would love to pick this up later!”
For conversations you are going to enter with a known chatterbox:
Time limit + Excuse (optional) + Opener
“Hey, FYI I can only chat for fifteen minutes, but I’d still like to take the time to catch up while we can!” (Then use the defined time frame to exit tactfully).
Sample Script
You: Hey Dave, glad to see you. Unfortunately, I only have five minutes to chat before I have to head down the road to meet up with an old friend. But I’d love to know how you’ve been!
Dave: (Talks on and on for five minutes)
You: Hey, sorry to cut you off but I have to make my way over to my friend and meet him in two minutes. I can’t believe that happened to you! I’d love to pick up on this later! (SCF11.1)
Commentary and Tips
SCF11.1. A combination of the two frameworks gave notice to Dave that time was limited and allowed you to break free when time was up. Notice the following.
· “I only have five minutes” is the time limit.
· “Meeting an old friend” is an optional excuse thrown in afterward.
· “But I’d love to know how you’ve been” is the opener.
· “Sorry to cut you off” is the cutoff.
· “Make my way over to my friend” is the excuse.
· “Two minutes” is the time limit.
· “I can’t believe that happened to you” is optional detail to show you were listening and not preoccupied with leaving.
· “I’d love to pick up on this later” is the tactful goodbye.
Tip: Talking about a point that was covered in the conversation (such as whatever happened to Dave) is a great way to prove to your conversation partner that you were interested in the conversation and your departure is necessary, not meant to get away from them.
Challenge
Easy: Exit a conversation with a friend after a topic has naturally ended.
Medium: Exit a conversation with a stranger after a topic has naturally ended.
Hard: Exit a conversation with a stranger mid–topic.
Now What?
Congratulations on making it through the SCFs! I hope you found them a beneficial resource to aid in you in bettering your conversational skills.
However, I believe that theory by itself will only get you so far. To obtain the full benefits of what this book is presenting, I have included challenges and worksheets to put these principles into practice.
As mentioned in the “How to Use This Book” section, I recommend doing the worksheets in the Appendix before the challenges that were present at the end of each SCF – the worksheets are designed to lower the barrier of entry of talking to people as well as help you establish a strong foundation in conversation.
Take the time to do them and you will pick up on what each SCF is specialized in as well as how they tie together. Excited?
Let’s get to it!
Part III
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Appendix
Worksheets
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References
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Blatner, Adam. “ABOUT NONVERBAL COMMUNICATIONS.” Nonverbal Communications, 29 June 2009, www.blatner.com/adam/level2/nverb1.htm.
“Chapter 15 – Evolution of Nonverbal Communication in Hominids.” Language Evolution, 22 Mar. 2017, blogs.ntu.edu.sg/hss-language-evolution/wiki/chapter-15/#3_Non-verbal_Communications.
“Conversing with Ease.” Toastmasters International.
“Dictionary by Merriam–Webster: America's Most–Trusted Online Dictionary.” Merriam–Webster, Merriam–Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/.
Jackendoff, Ray. “FAQ: How Did Language Begin?” Linguistic Society of America, www.linguisticsociety.org/resource/faq-how-did-language-begin.
Wertheim, Edward G. “The Importance of Effective Communication.” Northeastern University, College of Business Administration, 10 Oct. 2008.
About the Author
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Alixander Laffredo–Dietrich is more than just a funny name—he is an entrepreneurial artist who bridges the gap between pragmatism and creativity. In other words, he likes using the best of both sides of his noggin to solve any problem in any solution.
As a shy guy turned social enthusiast, his main focus is dissecting soft skills and presenting them in a way that is accessible to all people, from those riddled with social anxiety to the most socially comfortable people.
This is why he created Galhad, an online platform dedicated to teaching soft skills in a structured curriculum. He has taught workshops at colleges on topics ranging from basic communications to job-hunting and does private coaching to help people overcome their biggest obstacles when it comes soft skills.
Alixander has also developed his own skills through various means, from formal organizations such as Toastmasters International to personal trial and error. He shares his reflections and techniques via his Communication Skills 101 series of books as well as speeches he has given at IBM, TEDx, and college universities.
For more information, visit:
www.galhad.com
Did You Enjoy This book?
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If you found this book helpful and enjoyable, I would appreciate it immensely if you would leave me a quick review on Amazon. The feedback you provide is not only something that I am greatly thankful for, but also helps me know what I should continue doing and what I can improve on. If you would be willing to share your two cents, you can do it right here . . .
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this book.
You are the best!
www.galhad.com
Communications Crash Course Page 6
