"If only it were the latter,” she murmured, turning her back and pulling the coverlet up around her ears.
"What?” He sat up. “Julie?"
But Julie didn't plan to answer any more questions. Unfortunately, she'd let her thoughts be voiced aloud. She wouldn't compound that error by repeating her words. With great difficulty, she forced herself to relax and breathe evenly.
For several minutes he sat there, and she could feel those amber eyes scorching her back. She could outwait him. Think of something boring. How about armor? That less than fascinating subject should cool her blood.
Easy to say, but the overwhelming connection she'd felt while clasped in his arms with his mouth on hers creating outrageous sensations throughout her whole body had all the elements of her secret desire. She had never thought the man of her dreams would be a real knight. What irony no such man existed in her own time. What a cruel trick Lily had played on both of them. Each wanted someone else and instead, they'd been stuck with each other.
Yeah, how cruel for her to be stuck with Nicholas, the greatest man she'd ever met. If only circumstances were different, if only Nicholas didn't have his loyalty to Julianne to consider and she didn't have to return to the future. Their situation had all the elements of one of Shakespeare's poignant tragedies.
She stifled an ironic little chuckle. With all the problems she had, she didn't need his burden of guilt heaped on her shoulders.
Nicholas finally gave up and lay back down. Time passed and soon his even breathing told her he slept.
She slid down farther under the coverlet and resisted the urge to cuddle up to his strong, warm back spoon fashion. Let sleeping lions lie—and she had no doubt he could be as fierce and persistent as the largest of felines. Her only defense would be whatever walls she herself raised, walls to keep him out, because if she let him get too close, those walls would crumble.
Ah, Nicholas, if only... Regrets filled her mind as she drifted off to sleep.
Three days later, Eleanor and her sons Richard and Simon arrived escorted by a few of Miles’ soldiers. As they dismounted, Nicholas went to greet them.
Grooms took the boys’ ponies and Eleanor's mare to the stables. With an arm around his sister, Nicholas led the group into the great hall.
"My lord uncle, may we go watch the men practice?” Richard could hardly wait to become a page. At four, he displayed a remarkable maturity for one so young.
"Me too, me too,” cried Simon, always anxious to be included in his brother's activities.
Will, Nicholas's squire, stood nearby awaiting his master's orders for the day. “If you wish, my lord, I could take them down to the lower bailey."
"Fine, Will.” Nicholas heard Eleanor's faint sigh of relief. She trusted Richard, but with the added burden of tending his little brother, he might forget to take care. A bunch of large men charging up and down in armed combat could easily injure a small boy who got in their way—even if they did not mean to.
"You may go,” he told his nephews, “but stay out of the knights’ way and mind Will."
Eleanor smiled. “Methinks, brother, you will make a good father someday."
He mirrored her smile. “If God wills it."
Just then Lady Beatrix marched across the hall trailed by Julie.
Eleanor inclined her head in their direction. “How goes that?” While growing up, his sister had experienced the dominant disposition of her aunt and coped successfully. But he could see Eleanor had her doubts about Julie.
"Quite well. Julianne defers to Lady Beatrix, making the dragon happy."
His sister laughed and waved to Julie.
He had wondered how Julie would deal with the kind but strong-willed former chatelaine. His real wife had demonstrated wondrous insight into Lady Beatrix's mind. Surprisingly, the woman from the future also displayed the same talent. During the past week, the older woman had begun to praise Julie to him, claiming her a sensible girl, one willing to listen and learn. Remarkable, Julie's listening. It was more than she did to him.
"My lord. Lady Eleanor.” Beatrix curtseyed and Julie aped her successfully. At least it would have been most proper if he had not seen the amused twist of her mouth.
Eleanor took Julie's hand and pulled her down on a bench. “I am so happy we will have some time to get acquainted.” She gave Julie a hug.
Nicholas grinned. “I will leave you ladies to your housewifely tasks. I must spend the day drilling my knights and men-at-arms. Their skills need honing.” He did not elaborate on why such activity could not be deferred. Julie would know and Eleanor probably suspected.
Julie watched him stride away, his long muscular legs carrying him swiftly across the hall. Although he had not said so, she believed he was preparing for whatever action Sir Miles might take. She shook off that thought and turned to Eleanor.
"I don't think we should worry about our housewifely tasks right now.” Julie made a face and Eleanor laughed.
"Mayhap a stroll outside. After many hours of riding, I need to walk, not sit."
"I'd love that.” Julie was tired of trotting along after Lady Beatrix. Some fresh air and a leisurely walk sounded heavenly. Besides, if they went up and took a turn around the castle's parapet, she could see what Nicholas was doing. Hopefully, not decapitating dogs, she thought with a wry chuckle.
With no prompting, Eleanor led the way up the stairs in one of the wall towers. The two young women strolled along admiring the view of forest and fields. A large number of serfs were tilling the soil, maybe getting ready to plant some more much needed grain.
The day was a fair one, with a deep blue sky and marshmallow fluff clouds sailing along like ghostly galleons. The warm sun felt good on her back and her nose welcomed the fresh, outdoorsy odors. The dark green of the trees in the distance appeared cool and mysterious, as though secrets lurked beneath their boughs.
Julie remembered her ride through those same trees with Nicholas's arm holding her safely against him. A warm wave of happiness flowed through her. Then, she spotted him in the lower bailey with his men-at-arms. They had paired off and were practicing swordplay. Nicholas was the largest of the knights, the one whose heavy broadsword smote the air with lightning swift strokes, defeating all who challenged him.
Julie gasped as Sir Harald's sword nearly cut Nicholas's leg.
Eleanor laughed. “Do not fear, Julianne. Nicholas is merely toying with Sir Harald.” Nicholas parried Harald's thrust, but Julie realized he wasn't working hard at it. She knew the strength in those arms and Sir Harald wouldn't still have his head if the castle's lord wanted it badly enough. It made her feel better about the threat of Miles. Nicholas could probably handle his brother-in-law with one arm tied behind his back. Couldn't he?
"What kind of swordsman is your husband, Eleanor?” she blurted out, then blushed, thinking perhaps this question was better not asked.
The other woman's worried amber eyes, so like her brother's, met Julie's gaze. Could she fear for her brother's life?
"He is an outstanding swordsman,” she said quietly. “Years ago, he and Sir Edgar helped my brother secure this castle. In the Orient, they challenged the Saracens and killed many heathens in the name of God."
Julie shuddered, wondering whether any killing should be done in the name of God? Wisely, she kept that observation to herself.
"All three were wounded but lived to return home safely. Thank God.” Eleanor crossed herself. “I could not have born the loss of Nicholas."
How strange. She had not included Miles in that statement.
She collected her thoughts and asked, “When was this?"
"Almost a year ago. But you know that, Julianne. Your marriage to Nicholas was postponed until he returned.” Eleanor shot her a puzzled look.
"Yes, of course,” Julie murmured. Nicholas should inform her better so she didn't make such silly mistakes. He had finally explained that her mother was dead and her father ailing—the reason why he hadn't attended the wedding. “I
forgot,” she added, with an apologetic smile.
Eleanor patted her hand where it rested on the parapet. “I am just happy that thoughts of my brother drive less important matters from your head, Julianne. Nicholas works hard and needs someone with whom to share his life."
Julie agreed, but as the two stood silently watching the perspiring fighters below, she wondered if that were true. Was Nicholas lonely? Did he need a loving wife to complete his life? Would Julianne be the one to do this after she, Julie, returned to her own time?
Suddenly, she felt in less of a hurry to get back to Nick and the university. Would it be wrong to tarry a while in the thirteenth century? She could learn all kinds of things about this time, things not known by almost anyone in her time. Things long buried and forgotten in the musty depths of the world's great libraries. A wealth of material to fill her book. That alone would justify staying a bit longer. A little voice told her she had no control over the length of her stay. She pretended not to hear.
Nicholas chose that moment to step back and look up. Julie's heart skipped a beat at the wide grin he tossed her.
"He loves you,” Eleanor said simply.
"Um, yes.” No, he loved the woman whose body she, Julie, inhabited. She still didn't understand why her presence was necessary. When she went back home, Julianne would once again be with Nicholas. And he would be able to act on his physical desire for her.
Eleanor clearly expected Julie to exhibit more feeling for her husband. But since Julie, herself, wasn't sure about those feelings, how could she confide in his sister or force false sentiments past her lips. If Julianne could speak, she would undoubtedly declare her love and respect for her new husband.
She glanced at Eleanor. The other woman had moved to the edge of the walk. Julie hung back, not much liking that there was no inside rail. But standing on the edge of a twenty foot drop didn't seem to bother Eleanor.
"Oh, there they are,” she said after a moment, pointing to Richard and Simon who stood near the wall watching the action in the middle of the bailey. She called their names. The boys looked up and waved.
Eleanor sighed. “They are good children. I do not mean just now, but all the time. That is really remarkable considering their father's poor example."
Julie didn't know what to say. She'd learned from Nicholas that Miles wasn't an admirable man. But in this day and age, for Eleanor to confide her lack of respect for her husband was amazing.
Her sister-in-law laid a hand on her arm. “I am sorry. I did not mean to embarrass you."
Julie smiled. “For them to be so well behaved, you must have set them a wonderful example."
Eleanor's pleased expression told Julie she had said the right thing.
"I like to think so,” Eleanor murmured and linking her arm with Julie's moved on along the wall walk. They descended in the small central tower of the wall which divided the upper bailey from the lower.
Passing through a small arch, they strolled along near the wall. They were careful to keep a safe distance between themselves and the fierce war games in the center of the bailey.
"At mass this morning, I asked God to forgive my hateful thoughts about Miles,” Eleanor confessed as they neared the chapel.
Julie stared at the church. The cold stone structure appeared less than inviting. But she also kept this thought to herself. Aloud, she said, “Nicholas has told me a little about your husband. From what he said, I think Miles deserves every one of your hateful thoughts."
Eleanor stopped in front of the chapel and faced Julie. “It is good to have someone with whom to share my feelings."
Julie nodded as she noticed Robert walking toward them. He must be on some errand for Nicholas. But headed for the church? Nicholas avoided Father Thomas saying the man was overly sanctimonious.
"Sometimes, I think I will go mad living with Miles. He is a monster. He...” Suddenly, she clutched Julie's sleeve, her eyes fixed on something beyond Julie's shoulder. Her hand flew to her mouth and the color drained from her face.
It couldn't be Robert causing her reaction. Eleanor had her back to him.
Before Julie could ask what was the matter, Eleanor murmured, “I beg you to forgive my ramblings. If Miles is oft displeased with me, I am sure it is my own fault.” She turned and half ran back the way they had come, nearly colliding with Robert. With a muttered apology, she disappeared beyond the arch.
Julie swiveled, wanting to see what had caused Eleanor's reaction. Not six feet from her, leaning against the stone wall of the church, a man wearing Miles’ colors slouched. His eyes were fixed on something behind Julie. She whirled around again, just in time to see Robert give a slight shake of his head. The accountant turned away without greeting her and walked swiftly back the same way Eleanor had gone. Had he wanted to talk privately with Miles’ henchman? And if so, why? Could they be plotting... Oh, for goodness sakes, you've seen too many movies with the same somewhat contrived situation.
Julie smiled sweetly at Miles’ guard who gave her a dark scowl, then trudged away. He was one of several men Miles had sent with his wife. Since he never was far from Eleanor, Julie suspected him to be more a spy than an escort. He probably reported everything he learned to Miles. And just now, he'd overheard Miles’ lady say her husband was a monster. No wonder she'd fled.
Julie glanced toward Nicholas, who was battling one of the younger knights. She couldn't remember his name. Sparks flew as steel met steel. Fear held her rooted to the spot. While Nicholas attacked and parried with great ease, Julie could only think how many things could go wrong. He could turn an ankle or lose his balance. Would the younger knight take advantage of such an accident?
She held her breath, but Nicholas was poetry in motion, evading all the traps the younger man set for him. Finally, with one great sweep, he came up under the other man's sword, knocking it from his hand. It flew into the air and landed with a thud on the well-packed dirt. With a grin, Nicholas stepped back.
"Ho, Leon. Fine work. You are improving daily."
The handsome young man, who looked about twenty, laughed. “The day I beat you, Lord Nicholas, I will be the best swordsman in the world."
Nicholas clapped him on the shoulder, then sheathed his sword and walked over to Julie.
"Well, my lady, came you to see the practice?"
"I was walking with Eleanor and stopped to watch,” she replied, wondering whether she should tell him about his sister and Miles’ guard. Would that be a betrayal of Eleanor's confidences? Would Nicholas rush off to Miles’ keep and confront him? With relief she recalled Miles had gone to London.
"So, where is my sister?” He glanced about. “I thought I saw her hurry away."
Julie decided to wait before recounting Eleanor's problems to him. Maybe later tonight when they were alone. “She had something to do.” Julie wasn't good at lying and regretted the necessity.
"Go along, then. I will join you shortly. And, Julianne, have a hot bath waiting."
He was taking this husband and wife thing too seriously. “I will inquire if someone will have a tub ready for you. I, myself, have things to do."
He grinned impishly. “You will be there, my love. A proper wife tends her husband in all things, including baths."
Julie leaned toward him and said softly, “Yes, perhaps a real wife does. A pretend wife, however, does not.” She started to walk away.
He caught her forearm, though not hard enough to hurt, and prevented her escape. “To my people, you are my real wife. Just remember that. You will have my bath ready and be waiting to assist me. That is what wives in this time do.” His amber eyes heated to molten gold as he spoke. They held her with their stare and once again she felt a small tremor of fear.
She tossed her head and tilted her chin to show how little his orders meant to her. “Let go."
His hand dropped away. Julie crossed her arms and gave him a frosty glare. “You would be wise to send me back and let Julianne do your bidding. She's been raised from birth to
bow down to a man, to accept everything he says as law."
Nicholas moved forward until his large body was only inches from hers. “I will not send you back until I know for what purpose you are here. For now, you would be wise to act my wife with a little more conviction."
His words angered her, but she bit back a sharp reply. “For now, Nicholas, I'll comply. Just don't push me too far.” He really hadn't and she knew it. But there was only so far she would go toward being Julianne. The time had come to draw the line.
She spun on her heel and marched away. Until she passed beneath the small tower and out of sight, she felt his gaze burning her back. Of all the things she had to do in this time, keeping him at arm's length when she'd rather be in his arms was the most difficult of all.
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Chapter 13
Nicholas's bath turned out to be less of a disaster than Julie had feared. Lady Beatrix had required her presence in the kitchen, so Maude scrubbed Nicholas clean. Not that Julie approved of that either, although she didn't know why she felt that way. Nicholas was only her pretend husband and whether or not someone else washed him should be none of her concern. But a little knot of jealousy formed in her chest and made her less attentive to Lady Beatrix than she should have been.
Now, she hurried into the great hall and took her place at the table next to Nicholas. Dinner was served, but Eleanor did not come down to eat. Julie kept glancing anxiously toward the stairs, but they remained empty.
"Is something the matter, Julianne?” Nicholas had noticed her restlessness.
"I'm concerned for Eleanor. I sent Gwyneth to see if she needed anything, but she said no. I really don't know her well enough to keep pushing."
He lifted a quizzical dark eyebrow. “How so?"
"She might think I was prying."
Nicholas smiled. “She would be happy you cared."
"I'm not sure about that."
He gave her a long stare. “What has happened between you two?"
"Nothing.” She wasn't ready to share with him yet. Even though she wanted to. His amber eyes searched hers and the warmth in them made her tremble. If only she could reach for his hand, tell him they needed to discuss this. But she couldn't. Not till Eleanor had given her permission to tell her brother—which might not happen.
The Amethyst Amulets Page 14
