Divorced in Danville

by E. M. Sadler

  My mom used to say that he only married her so that he wouldn't have to talk as much at social events, but I knew this wasn't the case. I couldn't tell you how many times I walked in on my parents making out like teenagers as a kid.

  Heck, I even caught them necking in my pantry last week, which was very difficult to explain to Katie and John.

  Leaving my mother to finish cooking, I wandered back into the living room to stretch out next to my dad and try to catch a cat nap with my sleeping twins.

  When 3:00 pm rolled around, I had been awake for thirty minutes and was already aching to see my Kelly. I couldn't believe that after Wednesday she and the girls would become a permanent fixture in my home.

  Our home!

  At precisely 3:30 pm, I heard a knocking at the door, and before I could answer it, both John and Katie jumped out of their napping spots like a pair of Mexican jumping beans.

  "Is Mazie here?" Katie asked.

  "Is Mr. Sadler here?" John asked.

  Apparently, my twins had separate priorities.

  John ended up winning.

  Terry, Shawn, the boys, and Joan all piled into the living room. Luckily, my mother chose that moment to enter the room, so I only had to introduce everyone once.

  When we had everyone settled, my mom took Shawn and Joan back to the kitchen to finish up preparations.

  "Hey dad, you know that IPA from Sadler's Ridge I buy you every week?" I asked my dad who was silently observing the men of Kelly's family like a sideshow curiosity.

  My dad didn't usually spend time with farmers. Not that he ever felt superior to them. He was just fascinated by American subcultures. Thankfully, mention of Terry's beer brightened my dad's smile especially since my dad is always asking me to bring him a six-pack of Sadler's Finest every week.

  "You're not the owner, are you?" my dad asked in awe of his new acquaintance.

  "I am, are you a fan?" Terry asked.

  "It's the only IPA I drink at home. I have one every day of the week but Friday with dinner."

  Chuckling at my poised father's sudden perkiness, because he was indeed acting "perky," Uncle Terry asked, "Why not Friday?"

  "Well, there's only six in a pack and Dale brings me a six pack every Saturday," he said with a sigh like this was the most devastating thing he'd ever experienced. "We have a small grocery by the retirement community, but they only carry the national brands."

  Laughing at my father's lovable dorkiness, I wandered back into the kitchen to check on the ladies so that my dad could grill Terry Sadler like the information sponge that he was.

  "Alright Ladies, what's the official menu for this evening? Holy crap that's a lot of food!" If I based it on the amount of food on my counter, we should all be able to eat three meals a day for the next month.

  "Oh, stop it, Dale!" Shawn said smacking me on the arm. "Half of these aren't cooked yet. They're freezer meals that Joan and I worked on today with all of the leftovers from Thanksgiving."

  "We have three broccoli chicken casseroles; two spoon breads; three meals worth of green beans and ham; six zucchini breads; and eight bags of various soups," Joan added with a smile.

  "Why on earth would you go through all of that trouble for us?" I asked in awe of the work they had put into making sure we had easy access to homemade meals.

  "Well, Shawn and I do this after every holiday for the family so that we don't waste leftovers. And you are family now," Joan said patting me on the back affectionately.

  Completely touched, all I could say was, "Thank you!" before I began lugging the items down to my stand up deep-freezer. Side note: I used to have a freezer chest, but I always hated digging around in that damn thing. At least the stand-up one had shelves, and I could see everything clearly.

  When I returned from storing the food at exactly 4:00 pm, I heard a chorus of greetings signaling that my Kelly had finally arrived. Rushing towards the door, I immediately excused myself and pulled Kelly into the den for a proper hello.

  "Are you ready?" I asked between kisses.

  Seriously, two days away from her was too much.

  "Definitely! But before we go back in there, I need to tell you something." There was obvious concern written all over her face.

  "Honey, what's wrong?" I asked, holding her while she sighed into my neck.

  "Mazie told Geoff about our sleepovers, and now he's pitching a fit about how inappropriate I'm being and that if he hears of another sleepover, he's going to call the school board and file a complaint about our relationship."

  Asshole!

  "Well it's a good thing that our next sleepover will be on Wednesday night after our wedding," I said, kissing her behind the ear. "Don't let him get to you."

  "I love you!"

  "I love you, too. Now let's go tell our families."

  Chapter 49 – Kelly

  Telling our family about our upcoming wedding went surprisingly well.

  As soon as we mentioned the words "morality clause," both Dale's father and my mother were entirely in agreement that a long engagement didn't make sense, especially if it could damage Dale's career and cause issues with Geoff.

  The only alteration they requested was that instead of the courthouse on Wednesday, my mom and Dale's parents would convene at Dale's for the quick ceremony where his father would officiate. The more significant, formal wedding would be held at the farm the Saturday after Christmas with only close family and a handful of friends.

  Dinner went by too fast, and soon I was loading the kids back into my car and saying goodbye to my Dale.

  My Dale! In just three days I could officially call him mine. I no longer even care if the moms of the PTA found out. Who I'm married to shouldn't dictate who my real friends were. I'd rather have a few real friends than twenty fake friends anyway.

  "Feeling nervous?" Dale asked while hugging me goodbye.

  "Believe it or not, this is one of the few events in my life where I don't need to overthink my decision. Marrying you feels kismet."

  Dale kissed me one last time, confirmed our nightly call, and reluctantly released me so that I could drive home.

  Three more days and I wouldn't have to leave.

  Monday's lunchtime marriage license mission went off without a hitch, and we were in and out of the clerk's office within 30 minutes.

  "I wish we didn't have to abide by this stupid 48-hour waiting period!" The anticipation of our upcoming nuptial was only fueling our need for each other, and making me increasingly annoyed.

  "So impatient, almost Mrs. Wilson. I only wish you weren't in the middle of your busy season and we could take a half day on Wednesday instead of a long lunch."

  "Don't worry, Mr. Wilson. Come December 8th; I plan on christening every hidey hole in your house while the kids are at school, so be prepared to take a sick day."

  "Our house!" he said with conviction.

  "Our house!" I said, before taking his hand.

  Tuesday my schedule was thankfully packed due to a large enrollment party at a local group home, allowing me to soldier through my day without too many thoughts of Wednesday's exciting events. Unfortunately, by the time I put the girls to bed, I couldn't keep my eyes open, and I knew that there was no way that I would be able to stay awake for our regular nightly call.

  I did at least remember to text Dale so that he wouldn't wait up for me.

  Kelly –

  Can't keep my eyes open and need my beauty sleep for tomorrow. See you at 12:00 pm.

  Dale –

  I guess I can forgo one night of talk time. Love you! See you at 12:00 pm.

  Kelly –

  Miss you!

  If my days weren't so busy right now, I would be a little more concerned at my uncharacteristic exhaustion. Besides feeling tired all of the time, my stomach pain continued to bother me and had me wondering if it was actually a UTI instead of a strained muscle.

  "Maybe that's the issue, and I just need to get some antibiotics?" I thought to myself before driftin
g off into a deep sleep.

  When my alarm clock went off at 7:00 am, the first thing to catch my attention was a text from Dale.

  Dale-

  5 hours till your officially Mrs. Wilson.

  Kelly –

  4 hours and 52 minutes Mr. Wilson. Xo

  "Today is my wedding day!" I whispered into my semi-dark bedroom. The complete joy I felt from that little admission had me bounding out of the bedroom like a jack in the box. Anxious to get the girls ready so that my day could officially get started, I almost skipped down the hallway till I overheard my mother in the girls' room talking about how they were moving tonight.

  "Grammy is it true that I get to stay at Katie's EVERY night?" Mazie asked, with complete glee.

  "It is!"

  "Mandy! We get to stay at Katie's!"

  "Kakie, Kakie!" Mandy squealed, before continuing on her mission to shed her crayon's paper casing.

  "Good morning, my loves!" I announced as I walked into their room.

  "MOMMY!" both girls squealed, before running and hugging my legs.

  "Today is the BEST day EVER!" Mazie added.

  "I completely agree with you, Ms. Mazie," I said with an extra squeeze.

  "Since we will be living with Mr. Wilson, does that mean he will be my new daddy?" Mazie asked, and I suddenly realized what a crappy mom I had been by not taking the time to explain more about my upcoming marriage.

  All of the kids knew that Dale and I were getting married, but they had seemed so ecstatic about an endless sleepover that we hadn't thought more explanation was needed.

  "Mr. Wilson is going to be your step-daddy, which means you'll have your daddy and you'll have a bonus daddy."

  "What will I call him?" she asked while trying to process this new piece of information.

  "Well, what would you like to call him?" I asked. Dale and I had decided to let the kids pick the name they wanted to use when referring to us.

  "Hmmm... I'll have to think about it, Mommy. But I'll let you know!" Mazie said, before turning to pack her pjs and teddy bear in her suitcase.

  "Thanks, Mom. I feel awful about not making sure that Mazie understood more about us moving in with Dale. My brain has been missing its mark lately."

  "No worries, sweetheart. I know your work is always crazy this time of the year, but the good news is you have less than two weeks till things slow down a bit," she said, kissing me on the cheek. "By the way, I thought maybe I'd take the girls to school and daycare this morning. That way you could have a little extra time to get ready for work." Then she winked very awkwardly and made me burst into a fit of giggles at her goofiness.

  My mom was the best.

  Giving the kids a quick kiss goodbye, I rushed back to my room to dress for my work/wedding day.

  Initially, I wasn't sure what to wear since I would have to return to work shortly after the ceremony today, but like a fairy godmother, my best friend Joanie had sent me a gorgeous off-white work suit and blue blazer.

  Joanie was currently working as a stylist and personal shopper in London, which is how I came about this particular outfit.

  When our mothers had joined the military back in the late 1970s and had bonded so quickly during basic training, they entered a military buddy program that would allow them to follow each other from base to base for their entire career.

  Since Joanie and I were so close in age and my father decided to abandon my mother for long periods of time, Joanie and I were raised to be best friends like our mothers, and our only complaint was that we weren't related by blood. I was the nerdy, clumsy girl who never quite understood fashion trends, and Joanie was the cool, fashion genius.

  Starting at the age of 14 when mom allowed me to start buying my own clothes, I learned to hand over my clothing allowance to Joanie so that she could dress me. This trend continued until I left for college.

  However, much to the disappointment of my wardrobe, shortly after graduation, Joanie met the love of her life who was stationed in Germany where our moms were at the time of our graduation. So, while I moved to the states for college and to "reconnect" with my father's extended family that was living in Montana, she stayed overseas.

  Over time we slowly began to grow apart. Granted we would still email occasionally, but it was no longer feasible for Joanie to continue styling me in the age before online shopping became a daily part of life. Thus, by the time I graduated college I was far from trendy.

  I'll never forget the weekend back in 2006 while I was staying up at Sadler's Ridge when my Aunt Shawn asked my mom why she was washing all of "Mamma's" clothes. “Mamma” being my then deceased grandmother.

  They were my clothes.

  Joanie and I, eventually did start rebuilding our relationship again, but not until the day I moved out of the home Geoff, and I had shared for six years. That morning while packing, I heard a determined knocking on my door and found Joanie standing on my front steps with a pained look on her face.

  "Why didn't you tell me what was going on with Geoff all of these years?" she said while anger rippled through her body. "I asked you at your wedding rehearsal if he was always so critical and you promised me, Kelly, you promised me, that it was stress from the wedding!" I didn't know if she was angry at me or with Geoff, but when tears began to stream down her face, she dropped her angry stance and grabbed me into a giant bear hug.

  Overwhelmed by her comforting presence, I then proceeded to burst into hysterics. "I didn't mean to lie, I promise!" Which was true.

  When I had asked Geoff about his sudden criticalness right before our wedding, he had assured me that his surliness was entirely situational and that he was simply feeling the stress over having to deal with the parties leading up to our nuptials. "How did you find out?"

  "Mum called me yesterday. She said that your mom phoned her over a conversation you had with her last week. The one where you finally told her how bad things had gotten with Geoff and that you were leaving him," she said while brushing tears off her face. "I called my dad immediately and begged for a buddy pass.

  "He normally doesn't like to use them for American-bound flights because that means hounding the ticket counter to pick the perfect time. However, as soon as I told him it was for you, he ended up not only getting me on a red-eye but paid the fees for me to do so."

  Auntie Imogen's husband Donny worked as a pilot for Delta, and though Joanie could fly practically anywhere, American-bound flights were almost impossible to snag unless you timed them just right. "Thankfully, most of their flights were on time yesterday, and they didn't have too many rollover passengers from missed flights. So, now I'm here, and you have me for the next two days, so put me to work."

  Even though the last time I'd seen Joanie had been at my wedding to Geoff, we fell into a familiar chatter while we packed up the girls' rooms. She talked about London, her in-laws, and her crazy clients. I told her about my marriage and how I'd finally decided it wasn't salvageable. Everything seemed to flow naturally, however, that is until we reached my room. That's when she started to become incredulous.

  "Kelly Persons Jenkins! Please tell me an alien has stolen your real clothes."

  "What do you mean? What's wrong with my clothes?" I asked, hurt by her disgust. Since my Aunt’s comments back in 2006, I really had tried to be somewhat fashionable.

  "Where are all of the cute dresses and skirts you used to love to wear? Where are your signature reds and the purples you used to cherish?"

  Unable to take any more criticalness after years under Geoff 's controlling passive aggressiveness, I finally blew a socket, and poor Joanie was the recipient.

  The unintelligible ranting and raving went on for a good 30 minutes while Joanie stood shamefaced and shocked. By the time my tirade was complete, she had wrapped me in her arms and said, "I'm sorry, Kelly, I'm so, so sorry! Please don't be mad at me," she said while I sniffled uncontrollably. "Can I ask you something?"

  "Well, since I've pretty much just used you as a punching bag,
I'd say you're entitled to a question or two."

  "Do you feel pretty when you dress in the clothes you have now?"

  That’s when I realized how over the years, Geoff had slowly taken over dressing me in the dowdiest and un-sexiest clothes till I no longer felt beautiful in anything that I wore.

  "No, but my body isn't built for anything other than pants and shirts anymore," I said motioning to my weighted curves. This was the response I had learned to expect from Geoff anytime I would show him a new dress or skirt.

  "That's crap, and I'm guessing this is more of Geoff 's influence. Let's finish getting you packed up, and then we are going to go get some pizza and have a conversation."

  Once all of the boxes were ready for the movers who were due to arrive the next morning, Joanie and I went for pizza and discussed how we were going to bring back my confidence.

  Because I had pulled money out of my 401k to fund my divorce and my mom was going to allow me to stay with her indefinitely for almost nothing, we decided that I needed to use some of my funds for "Project Confidence," as Joanie put it.

  Taking the lead, Joanie called the local spa and ordered the works for me for the following Saturday. Starting at 8:00 am I would receive a haircut and dye, a manicure, pedicure, a makeover, a massage, a mud bath and even... waxing.

  "But why would I wax when I'm not planning on dating until my divorce is finalized?"

  "That's the best part about it. This is for Y-O-U! Not Geoff, not another man. This is for YOU!" she said with conviction.

  Though I hated the idea of spending a frivolous $600.00 on a spa day, it did it's magic like Joanie expected. Suddenly, I no longer felt chubby and unattractive. No, it gave me a reason to take pride in myself and gave me the confidence to feel curvaceous and beautiful again.

  The second part of Joanie's plan involved donating most of my clothes to Goodwill. Therefore, except for my nursing tops and a few pairs of pants and jeans, which I refused to part with and a few things that were necessary for day-to-day function, my clothes only filled one fifth of my closet at my mother's house after Joanie’s purge.