Divorced in Danville

by E. M. Sadler

  Dale –

  You're crazy!

  Kelly –

  Crazy for you ;)

  Once my face-mask had been removed, I was happy to see that Mrs. Dalton had come to pick up the girls. Though I loved spending time with them, the next few hours of our spa day weren't available for those under the age of 18, and I knew I'd feel guilty if they were stuck waiting around for us to finish.

  Parting with hugs and promises of seeing each other for dinner, I was then ushered towards the waxing section to have my eyebrows done. As if timed perfectly, by the time I exited the waxing pod, I found my six remaining cohorts for the day waiting in the lobby.

  Breaking for lunch in the spa's tearoom, our pre-reserved table was set when we arrived for a full English tea. The best part was, that since I wouldn't be laying on my stomach for my massage, I didn't have to feel wary about allowing myself to get a little stuffed. Around 1:00 pm, Rane and Joanie were called away for their facials leaving me to walk off my food coma and spend a little time with the older women in my life.

  Since Mom, Pam, Shawn and Imogen would be leaving shortly to help set up Pam's clubhouse at the retirement village for our rehearsal dinner, I took the opportunity to walk around the greenhouse gardens with them and enjoy their presence.

  The hedges were just tall enough to allow us to feel lost in the garden's magic and I had to keep reminding myself that I needed to keep track of the time, or I'd miss my next appointment.

  The best part of our walkthrough was how well Pam fit in with my motherly conglomerate. She was a relatively easy-going person and a lot like my Dale when it came to how she approached people, so I knew it wasn't for show.

  After our walk, we said our goodbyes around 1:45 pm, and I joined Rane and Joanie to see if they were ready to venture onto our massages.

  Finding them laughing over a shared joke, I was saddened by the thought that none of us lived close to each other. Was there hope that we could continue this closeness in the future?

  A few minutes later, we were each guided into a small dressing room with lockers to change out of our street clothes and into the fluffiest robes I have ever worn.

  Seriously, this robe was the best thing to touch my skin in my entire life... well except for Dale. But it was a close race.

  When 2:15 pm arrived, we were then placed in the couples massage room that had been rearranged to accommodate three tables comfortably so that we could each shoot the bull while being relaxed by a professional masseuse.

  Thankfully, when I called to rearrange my spa schedule and explained my recent hospitalization and pregnancy, the spa was extremely amenable. One of the three therapists that had been scheduled for our session was also a registered maternity masseuse, so they only had to shuffle us around a bit.

  After our 60-minute massages, we were each directed to a room filled with fluffy duvet covered single beds surrounded by elaborate curtains that separated each bed for privacy.

  Stripping from our robes, we were each given a glass of lemon water and tucked into our beds, which had preheated bedding for our therapeutic naps.

  I originally wasn't interested in the napping portion of the spa, but after the month I was having, a nap was just what I needed, even if it was only for an hour.

  Right on schedule, we were each woken an hour later by one of the attendants who placed a fresh glass of lemon water on our side tables and given privacy to dress into our robes so that we could be escorted back to the dressing room.

  Once in the dressing room, I reluctantly placed my plush robe in the laundry basket and dressed quickly to make my 4:30 pm hair styling appointment with my friends. Since I wasn't doing anything elaborate, the stylist was able to quickly straighten my hair and then curl it at the end so that it looked like something Farah Fawcett would have worn back in the seventies.

  Initially I had expected them to wash my hair, but Renee my stylist explained that you shouldn't wash your hair for three days before a wedding. That way your hair would be easier to style.

  Who knew?

  Done with my hair by 5:15 pm, I spent the 15 minutes before my makeup appointment perusing Pinterest for ideas on how to decorate a nursery for twins, while Rane and Joanie had their hair placed in curly up-dos.

  By the time our make-up appoints were completed, we were all feeling thoroughly relaxed and pampered. Unfortunately, the spa was closing for the day, so we didn't have time to find a place to change into our rehearsal dresses.

  With my home being the closest, we all loaded into Rane's rental car and booked it home, thanking God again for sparing us from the normal traffic that locks down the roads connecting my house to the spa.

  Running into the house, Rane and Joanie each took a bathroom on the first floor, while I ran up the stairs to the bathroom I shared with Dale. What I wasn't expecting was to find a half-dressed Dale, pulling on his white dress shirt and looking dashing in those midnight blue suit pants that were sitting just right on his perfect backside.

  Shocked by each other's presence, Dale glanced towards me with keen appreciation before smiling, striding over to where I was standing by the door and kissing me with a deep-seated hunger — breaking away long enough to tell me how beautiful I was, he then silently guided me into the bathroom.

  Pulling down my underwear, Dale quickly removes himself from his pants, and within seconds he was thrusting into me with a sigh.

  Moving against each other quickly, I soon felt Dale run his index finger over my clit before we exploded together in joyous bliss moaning each other's names.

  While we are still catching our breath, we heard Rane knock at my door. "Kelly, it's 6:57 pm, are you ready to go yet?"

  "You know, Rane. Dale said he'd give me a lift. I'll meet you at the clubhouse," I said while stifling a giggle at the situation.

  Once, we heard Rane descending the stairs, both Dale and I burst into laughter before kissing each other tenderly.

  "I can't believe I have to sleep in our bed without you tonight," he said while readjusting his pants and buttoning his shirt.

  "On the bright side, it will probably be the last time for a VERY long time, that we are apart."

  Chapter 73 – Dale

  I hated letting Kelly go after dinner that night. But her family had insisted that it would be an easier day for her as the bride, if she were already at Sadler’s Ridge in the morning. This way she could also have a full night of sleep without the kids, and to my great disappointment, me.

  After our interlude in the bathroom, I was half tempted to suggest Kelly stay the night with me, but the desire to give Kelly the best night sleep possible won out. Especially since I knew that if she were to come home with me, we would not be spending very much time sleeping.

  To help me with my four munchkins, Kevin and his girls decided to stay at our house for the evening. The break would also give Joan some alone time with her boyfriend Jim who was flying in later tonight for the wedding.

  Thank God that they did too because the following morning sweet little Mandy had the craziest tantrum I have ever seen and required all of my attention. Waking up hysterical around 6:00 am, the fact that Kelly wasn't there was so devastating to her that I almost called Kelly so that she could Facetime with us and help calm Mandy's anxiety.

  Instead, I rocked her until she could use her limited language skills to tell me how to make it better.

  Sniffling, she informed me that if I gave her an Oreo, MAYBE she'd be able to sleep better without Mommy.

  With her cookie in hand, I turned Pocoyo on the Apple TV, where she promptly fell asleep clinging to my neck like a koala. Since it was almost 7:00 am at this time, I decided not to try and place her back in bed and held her while I watched some SkyNews to pass the time.

  At some point, I must have dozed off because when I woke an hour later, everyone was in the living room watching me with their cameras in hand.

  I guess about 15 minutes before my waking, Mandy had woken to eat her half-melted cookie and h
ad then inadvertently smeared chocolate all over my face.

  She liked to pet people when she was cuddling, so I probably should have anticipated this. But who is that alert before 8:00 am?

  Still snuggled in my arms when she noticed I had finally awoken, Mandy threw her arms around my neck and said, "I wuv you Dede Dale!" and I'm not lying, I almost cried in front of my audience, which now included my Mom and Dad.

  An hour later, everyone was cleaned up and ready to head to the Sadler's, but due to a wreck on the highway, we were running dangerously behind schedule.

  Keeping up to date with Joan via text, Mom continued to give us play by plays on things that were falling behind on our to-do list. When Mom informed me for the 5th time that the girls were late to their hair appointment, I couldn't take it anymore. Making an executive decision to maintain my sanity, I grabbed my mother's cell from her hands and threw it towards the back row of my van where Kevin was currently sitting between Katie and Mandy.

  "Hey! Dale, I need to be able to communicate with Joan," she huffed indignantly.

  "Mom, all you're doing is stressing me out. I can't get the traffic to move any faster, and I'm sure Kelly isn't as stressed out about this as you are right now. You're being a total...What do they call it Lilly on that show you watch?" Lilly had been binge-watching bride shows with Joan since Kevin's brood moved in with her last week and was currently sandwiched between John and Mazie on the second row of my van.

  "Momzilla," she proclaimed with complete confidence. "But to be fair Uncle Dale, if she were a Momzilla, she'd be a lot crazier."

  "I'm just trying to make this day perfect for you, honey," Mom said crossing her arms over her chest and huffing. "Maggie never let me help with your first wedding, so this will be my only chance to be part of the action."

  Great! Now she was pouting AND giving me a guilt trip.

  "I promise that Kevin will let you know if any pertinent ‘emergencies' arise in the next hour. But for now, Mom, please let's try to make the best of this crappy traffic jam. Deal?"

  "Deal," she mumbled begrudgingly.

  When we finally arrived at Sadler's Ridge, we were greeted by a very frazzled Joan Persons.

  "It's about time, Dale Wilson. You couldn't have stepped on the gas a little harder?" Joan asked showing an uncharacteristic snippiness I had never seen her display in the past.

  "Joan, I promise you, there was no way around the traffic jam today, now point me to where I need to take the girls for their hair," I said while carrying Mandy towards the house.

  "No sir, you're not allowed at the big house until 5:00 pm. You and John are being sent to the lean-to until the photographer comes to get you at 3:00 pm. Now shoo!" she said taking Mandy from me, who was a little perturbed that I wasn't coming with her. "I see you smirking at me Dale Wilson, I mean business!" she added, but as she turned to walk back to the house, I could see a little grin forming on her face.

  Once the girls were unloaded with their things, Lilly and Mom took Katie and Mazie by the hand and led them away, while Kevin, John and I headed to the lean-to for our five-hour exile.

  When we reached the lean-to, we were immediately greeted by a new addition to our group: an older gentleman who had a very close resemblance to Stanley Tucci.

  Upon introductions, I was advised that the Stanley lookalike, was Joan's boyfriend Jim, who had just arrived from Turkey last night.

  After our initial greetings, us guys didn't have much to do. Thankfully, Uncle Terry anticipated how to fill our time and had brought along samples of his newest recipes to see what we thought would be the best IPAs for spring. Between this, an ongoing game of Risk, and the college football game Terry's boys were watching; our time flew by until it was finally time to get ready.

  While helping John into his suit, my quiet child suddenly became a chatterbox.

  Apparently, American football was the coolest thing ever, and since one of Terry's boys had mentioned that there were teams for boys as young as four, he was begging me to let him join it. Not wanting to crush my son's interest I promised to look into peewees for him for next year while secretly groaning in frustration.

  Football was a sport we didn't watch at home because it was frankly the one sport I didn't enjoy.

  Feeling satisfied by my agreement, John ran back to his new cousins so that he could bombard them with more questions about how the game of football worked.

  Ugh! Why couldn't he have chosen something like hockey or soccer?

  Chapter 74 – Kelly

  Waking at 8:00 am on the day of my wedding, I was pleasantly surprised to find a sticky note from my mom placed on my phone instructing me to text her when I was awake, but to stay cuddled in bed. She must have gotten here really early.

  I wonder if she and Jim had any sleep last night? I hope not. My mom definitely deserved a little nookie in her life.

  Within ten minutes of texting her, my room was invaded by Mom, Shawn, Imogene, Rane, and Joanie. Aunt Shawn was carrying an elaborate tray of breakfast goodies and coffee, while everyone else carried various gift bags.

  "Oh! This is awesome! You guys didn't need to do this." Just the sight of the food caused my stomach to leap with pure joy.

  "We wanted to make today special for you," My Aunt Shawn said smiling down at me.

  "Now, us old folk are going to leave you with your friends, along with a few bags of goodies to help you through your day," my mom said kissing me on the forehead before adding, "Just remember that the hair and makeup ladies are arriving at 9:00 am, so one of you two girls need to be down there to greet them," pointing at Joanie and Rane.

  Opening my gifts between bites of farm food goodness, I greeted my presents with a squeal of delight. Inside were bath treats and goodies from the Blue Lagoon in Iceland along with one of the robes from yesterday's spa.

  "Originally, we were only going to give you the bath gift set so that you could take a nice long bath. But while you were getting your makeup done, Joanie texted your mom about your reaction to the robe, and we all decided to pitch in and buy you one."

  "But I don't remember you sneaking away, how did you get it?"

  "Pam happened to be running last minute errands for the rehearsal dinner and snuck in to buy it," Rane smiled proudly, her dark curls bouncing with her as she jostled the bed.

  "You almost saw her too when you were buying your lipstick," Joanie added with a chuckle. "She had to hide in the dressing room while we hurried you out of the building."

  "The girl behind the counter was so pissed, and kept reminding poor Pam that they were closing," Rane said with a giant grin.

  After eating my fill, I was then ushered into the house's master bathroom, which housed a giant garden tub with jet engines.

  Damn, but it looked enticing. But was it safe to take a bath while my incisions were still healing?

  As if reading my mind, Rane said, "Don't worry, I messaged Nichole on Facebook and confirmed that since you're two weeks out from surgery, a bath would be fine."

  Leaving me to bathe, I spent the next 30 minutes relaxing with thoughts of Dale and the special day we would be sharing together.

  My first wedding had been a large and elaborate affair which I used most of my savings to pay for so that I could accommodate Geoff 's family. If I had had my way, it would have been a destination wedding that would welcome anyone who wished to come, followed by a family celebration here at the farm on a later date. Even Joanie had barely been able to make the ceremony before flying out due to Geoff 's insistence that the service be held on a day that accommodated his family and not mine.

  In the end, Geoff didn't want to inconvenience anyone he knew, and we ended up having one locally, which turned out to be way too stressful. At one point during the planning, I had to be hospitalized for dehydration caused by nervous vomiting.

  Geoff was furious at me the day I was admitted into the hospital for making a “spectacle” of myself and barely spoke to me for a week afterwards.

  Tha
t should have been my queue to break off the engagement, but back then I was convinced that Geoff just needed to adjust.

  Hindsight!

  Pushing memories of Geoff out of my mind, I switched my focus back to Dale and thoroughly enjoyed my bath until the water became too tepid to justify lounging any longer.

  As I dressed in my favorite flannel PJs and my new swanky robe, I slowly descended the stairs to find Mom frantically typing on her phone.

  "Where's the fire?" I ask laughing at her unusual display of frustration.

  My mother NEVER lost her cool.

  "Dale is late, and since Joanie and Rane are almost done with their hair, the stylist needs the girls," she explained while huffing out another message.

  "I don't mind going ahead and getting my hair styled. Can't we move around the schedule?"

  Sighing a little too dramatically, my mother said in an uncharacteristically condescending manner, "No we cannot, your hair has to be towards the end so that it will be fresh for your pictures at 4:00 pm." Then she turns back to her phone and attacked her messaging like it was the key to destroying all that was evil in the world.

  Looking over at my Auntie Imogene, I was glad to see that I was not the only one in shock over my mother's current behavior.

  Sneaking over to my mom's best friend, I whispered, "Can you go ask the hair stylist and makeup artist if they can stay an extra two hours. That way the aunts and moms can get their hair done too? I think Mom's so caught up that she's forgotten to think outside of the box."

  With a knowing wink, my Auntie disappeared down the hall to confirm my request and returned with a nod and miming $200.00. Willing to sacrifice the money to keep mom from losing her mind, I gently walked over to my mother and took the phone from her hand.

  While she was grabbing for her phone, I tossed it onto the giant love seat separating the kitchen from our family area and gave her a giant hug before she could object.

  "Mom, it's going to be okay. Dale and I had a discretionary fund for just this situation, and the hair stylist and makeup artist have already agreed to stay an extra two hours. Now, go and get your hair done!" I said, kissing her on her cheek.