“I’m sorry, Mel. I asked the doctor to do it.”
He had? I have only two words for him. “Thank you.” It will be something concrete that Skull won’t be able to deny. “How do we get Skull’s?”
“There’s probably something left in his room,” Pyro suggests.
“Or we demand that he provides a swab,” Dad suggests. “What he put you through Mel, was psychological torture. There’s no way of proving that led to you losing the baby, but your suffering when he left, then when he turned up again, should be enough.”
“He raped me. I didn’t give my consent.”
Dad shakes his head. “I don’t think we’ll get him on a rape charge, though we can try. He didn’t force you into bed, even though he misrepresented who he was.”
“Will he go to jail?” I ask hopefully. That’s the outcome I want—to know he’s suffering every day for the wrong that he did.
“I can’t promise you that, Mel. There are so many factors. But we’ll take it as far as we can.”
“We don’t know where he is.”
Pyro raises an eyebrow toward my father.
Who responds, “We know his real name, and his employers will certainly be able to find him. He’ll be working for the cops or feds.”
“I’ll have to face him.” My tone gives away neither one thing nor another.
Dad grins. “You’re my daughter. As soon as Pyro suggested we give you the lead in getting retribution, I knew this was what you needed, and that you are fully capable of following it through.”
“You’ll be my lawyer?”
“I’m an attorney in the state of Colorado where the crime occurred. So yes, I’ll represent you.”
As I realise I’ll be expected to tell my lawyer everything, I press my lips together and shift a little awkwardly. Seems I don’t need to explain.
“Strange as it may seem, I do know how babies are made.” He smiles.
I glance down at my hands. In some ways getting revenge, making Skull face up to his crimes sounds good, in others, well, it won’t give me my baby back. Though knowing he hasn’t walked away unscathed would be some comfort.
Pyro seems to read my mind. “Be interesting to know whether Clare’s still with him. Might be he’s lost his own family.”
Is it wrong of me to hope that’s what happened? To know that Skull will lose his own child and know one-hundredth of the pain I’m feeling is welcomed.
“You don’t have to decide or start anything now.” Pyro leans over and covers my wringing hands, stilling them.
Dad looks from him to me, then stands and leaves us alone.
“It’s just so hard, Ro. I, I…”
“Come with me, come outside.” His arm comes around me to support me as we go out into the rapidly setting sun of the Vegas evening. He leads me over to a bench and sits down, patting the wooden seat beside him. “Can I just hold you, Mel?”
“I’m not being fair to you,” I start.
“Life’s not fair.” He stares up at the stars just starting to show. “Fair is none of this happening. Fair is for us to have recognised Skull for what he was long before he was patched in. Fair is you never meeting the man.” He pauses. “But if things were fair, I wouldn’t have met you.”
“You’d have been saved a lot of pain then.”
“No, Mel. This rough patch, I know neither of us can see a way through, but we’ll get there, I promise you.”
“Maybe you should find someone else.” Someone who’s not broken.
“I’m not going anywhere, sweetheart. I promise you, good or bad, we’re in this together.”
His pained expression makes me remember the different one he wore just two-and-a-half weeks ago, the joy on his face when we heard the baby’s heartbeat for the first time and saw the picture on the screen. His pride when showing the photo of his son around. He lost his baby too.
For the first time, guiltily I allow him to share my loss. “Are you hurting, Ro?”
His hand grips mine. “More than I can fuckin’ put into words.”
He’s a man, so he doesn’t let it show.
“We should grieve together.” That’s what we haven’t been doing. I’ve been selfish, just thinking of me, and not about what he lost too.
“That’s what I want, Mel. To help you through this, as you’ll help me. We both need to heal, and for that, we need to go home. When the doctor clears you to fly, we’ll go back to Pueblo.”
I’m pretty sure I’ll get the okay from the doctor on my next check-up. The bleeding, that final physical reminder of everything I’ve been through, has, at last, stopped. “Can we visit the grave again, before we go?”
“Of course we fuckin’ can. I’d like to as well.” Pyro gives a small smile. “Seeing him there, among brothers, seems right. Comforting, somehow. We can come back to Vegas whenever we want or need to.”
He’s right. It’s weird but buried where he is makes me feel I’m not leaving my son alone, or unprotected. There’s a peace, a comfort in having a place where my baby lies. I don’t know what strings Red pulled, or whether he just did it not caring about rules, but it was the right thing to do.
We sit, letting the night descend around us, no need for more words. I’m happy he knows there isn’t anything more to say. Not right now.
The next day my parents are getting ready to leave.
“Come back to Denver, Melissa.” My mom’s concerned eyes meet mine.
“No, Mom. I’ve got my job, my friends, and… Pyro.” I look at them. My parents dropped everything to come be with me and ended up in the midst of a biker club and seem to have taken it all in their stride. While they’ve stayed at a hotel, they’ve been here every day. I do wonder what they really think about my continued association with the club, which is why I hesitated before saying Pyro’s name.
“Skull dragged you into this world,” my dad starts, his face serious. “This club isn’t to blame for anything that happened to you, unless there were illegal activities for Skull to find out.”
I stop him. “We assume he found nothing…”
“I agree,” he replies fast. “I’ve had conversations with Pyro, got to know Red and Crash a bit too. I put my judgement on the back burner and listened to what they had to say. I’m an attorney, Melissa. To you I’m your dad, and I’ve not brought my work home, but I’ve seen, and heard, a thing or two. The Satan’s Devils may live by their own rules, but if they step over the lines, I guess it’s with good reason.” He glances at my mom. “I like the way this club supports you—not every MC treats its women in such good ways. What I have to admit worries me is that your mom and I, well, we accepted Skull, though we didn’t much like that he was a biker. He seemed a good man for you. I still can’t get my head around how he had us all fooled. I’m concerned about it happening again.”
“It won’t.” It’s all become clear in my mind. “Skull was an anomaly. There’s no reason to suspect Pyro isn’t exactly what he seems.”
Suddenly the arms of the man we’re discussing come around me, pulling me back against his firm chest. “I’ve nothing to hide. Get someone to investigate me.”
Dad looks at him with respect. “You understand it will be for our peace of mind?”
“Long as you know the club won’t share much. But I’ve managed the auto-shop for years, and my service is a matter of record.”
Dad reaches out his hand, Pyro takes and shakes it. Saying, as he does, “I’ll bring Mel up to Denver as soon as she’s ready.”
“I’ll start finding out what needs to be done,” Dad agrees. “And how to best put the case together.”
Then Mom’s hugging me, and I’m hanging onto her, a hairbreadth away from changing my mind and going home with them after all. The main thing that stops me is somehow sharing Pyro’s pain lessens mine.
All too soon they have to leave, and a prospect drives them away in the club’s SUV.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Pyro
“Good to have
you back, Brother.”
“Fuckin’ good to be here.” I nod at Demon sat at the top of the table, then return chin lifts with each of my brothers in turn.
“Don’t know what to say to you.” Beef shakes his head, large sorrowful eyes meeting mine.
But they don’t need to put it into words. I hold up my hand. Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve heard enough platitudes to last me a lifetime. “Mel and I know you’ve got our backs, that’s enough.”
“Is it though?” Hellfire spits out from the opposite end to his son. “I take as much responsibility as anyone else for not seeing what was wrong with Skull. I was the one who patched him in.”
“Whoa, hold up there, Hell,” Demon begins, “it was a club vote. If everyone hadn’t said ‘aye’, he wouldn’t have gotten his patch.” His eyes scan each one of us. “There are no fingers to be pointed. We all had concerns that he came back after that beating he took, but our only thought was that he might want revenge. Even the vague suspicions we might have had weren’t close to the mark. The question is, how the fuck could he have fooled us like that?”
Lizard holds up his hand. “I saw something on TV once. These cops who go undercover have to become the person they’re pretending to be. Living a lie becomes living the truth. If he’d been part of an MC before, he’d have known exactly what behaviour we’d expect.”
I nod. I’m wondering whether Keys will get anything back about that. He’s promised to keep in touch should we get proof this wasn’t the first time he’d been undercover in a similar role. Of course, he’s liaising with Cad and their counterparts in other chapters. If there’s something to be found, one of them will find it.
“He played his part well,” confirms Ink. “Not a model prospect by a long shot, but we’d have been more suspicious of him if he was. I, personally, don’t think he’d been with another club. Didn’t come over that way. I think they put in a fresh face new to this particular type of job. Any prior knowledge or experience of a club would have made us look more closely at him.” He pauses, then continues, “Fuckin’ good at undercover operations though. I never suspected a thing.”
“Does it matter?” I ask them. “What we’ve got to deal with is now and not then.”
Prez interrupts, “It’s relevant if there were things we should have spotted and missed. Don’t want to be in this position again. Cad, have you completed those second background checks on Beaver and Karl?”
“Yeah, Prez. Turned nothing up. Been talking to Mouse, Keys and Hard Token about putting in a process to vet prospects and hangarounds better, sharing info between chapters. Trouble is, we’re dealing with the cops. They can concoct and support any background process so it would stand scrutiny.”
“So, we remain at risk?” Prez pinches the bridge of his nose. “Better keep our businesses clean then.”
“Stop prospects burying bodies?”
“Fuck no,” groans Thunder. “I don’t want to go back to the heavy work.”
“We’re small fry.” Beef’s brow has deep lines etched on it. “Even if we were into illegal shit in a big way, taking down the Satan’s Devils MC isn’t going to make big headlines.”
“What are you thinking, Beef?”
“Prez, I’ve just been mulling over the conversation we’ve already had. That the Wretched Soulz might have been his target, or maybe even the Mafia by way of the Silvestris.”
“Got any further than what we already discussed?”
“Not really,” Beef sighs. “But it could have been what he hoped to find out. Talk about our associates that wasn’t discussed openly at church. We know there’s no one else here, but what about the Wretched Soulz? Could he have been part of a larger operation?”
“Fuck.” Prez’s quiet for a moment. “I’ve already told them about Skull, but not to look inside their own houses. Guess I’m going to have to have another chat.”
“RIP cool?” Hellfire asks.
Demon shrugs. “Hard to read him. Making the admission we’d patched in an undercover cop wasn’t easy. He was taking it back to the table. Guess I’ll get an update when I next speak to him.”
He lowers his head into his hands after speaking and takes a deep breath. Fuck, I don’t envy him having those conversations. I’d heard the one with Drummer hadn’t been as bad as he’d feared and focused more on future prevention. But as for RIP? This is the second time in a year we’ve gone up against the Wretched Soulz, when normally we co-exist without often crossing paths. But an MC can’t afford to upset the dominant. There’s a chance it could risk losing our charter if they think we’ve been careless. A few glances are being exchanged around the table. The Soulz approve our rules and regs including the vetting of prospects. Could they blame us for letting Skull in? That Demon’s thinking along the same lines is confirmed when he next opens his mouth.
“I promised to give Drummer the head’s up if anything further goes south. Let’s hope it doesn’t. Getting back to what we can deal with. Skull.” Prez brings the meeting back on track. “What’s the plan?” He looks at me.
“Plan is when Mel’s feeling mentally stronger, she’ll bring a case against him. Her dad’s doing the groundwork now. Trouble is, once he submits the disposition, it’s pretty clear they’ll want to interrogate her.”
“She ever going to be strong enough for that?”
“You fuckin’ bet,” I growl. “My old lady’s got inner strength. Just got to give it some time to come back.”
“How is she doing, Ro?” Hellfire’s voice oozes sympathy.
“She has good days and bad days.”
Ink’s eyes half close. “She going to come back around?”
The old ladies have been visiting her, but she’s not yet been to the club. “I hope so.” It’s the best I can offer for now. “Vi’s helping, Demon. I think in her downtimes Mel’s worried that you might think she was a spy.”
“Never,” he growls. “She was innocent. But note that, Pyro. The fact she feels awkward now, all part of the case against the motherfucker.”
“Can’t see how he can keep his job,” Mace observes. “I hope once he’s not wearing a badge, you’ll take the restraints off us.”
I nod, though it’s Demon’s call. I’ve had more than one conversation with the enforcer about finding Skull and showing him extreme prejudice.
Mace shakes his head. “Could save a fuck ton of money if we find him and take him out without the legal shit.”
“He’s disappeared, Mace,” I remind him. “Only way to dig him up is to get him to appear in court, and any damage to him then would shine a light straight on us. And anyway, we’re not spending money. Mel’s attorney is providing his services for free.”
“Which means she’s got the best.”
Her dad certainly has a vested interest in getting justice for his daughter.
“Keep us posted, okay? Updates every church.” Again, Demon pinches the bridge of his nose. “I’m actually siding with Mace. If Skull turns up prior to going to court, if it’s safe, we’ll revisit a permanent solution then. No guarantee the cops won’t close ranks and he’ll get away and walk free.”
“But only if we can guarantee Satan’s Devil’s come away clean,” our VP warns. “Skull’s damaged the club enough, don’t want to add seeing men behind bars for the crime he’s done.”
Everyone nods in agreement. But I reckon, like me, they’re already making plans.
Although Skull had been the main topic, Prez moves on to the normal business of the club. I contribute where necessary, finding a comfort in returning to the men I’ve ridden beside for so long. I smile when, as I expect, Liz says something inappropriate, in return receiving glares from the top of the table. Cad stays serious, offering good observations. Thunder is all for action, and Mace thoughtful. I know and can predict how most people around this table will react in any given situation.
Brothers in Vegas were Devils and had done what they could to make me feel welcome and one of them. But it’s this crew I
’m pleased to return to, and this chair my rightful place.
At last Demon closes the meeting. I immediately stand, taking my bike key out of my cut.
“You sticking around for a beer, Ro?”
“Nah, Sparky. I’ve got to get back to Mel.”
I waste no time making the short journey between the club and where she lives. I let myself into her house with the key she’d given to me, growing tense at the sound of weeping. I follow it into the living room. She’s sitting on the couch, an open book beside her. Hurrying across, I move the volume to one side, quickly glancing down to see what it is, and pull her into my arms.
It’s the fucking baby book Vi had given her. Why is she torturing herself?
I simply hold her until her tears begin to dry up. It’s only when she’s grown calmer that she tells me what in particular has got her so upset.
“I was reading about miscarriage, Ro. Trying to work out why it happened.”
“Oh darlin’.”
“I wouldn’t want it to happen again, so I was trying to see what caused it.”
“We know why,” I tell her, forcibly. “We know who’s fuckin’ fault it was. And if the doctors couldn’t give you answers, Mel, you’re not going to find one from reading a fuckin’ book.”
“I want to move.” Her sudden change of subject takes me a moment to catch up. “I’ve been looking at places…”
“I’m more than happy to look for a new place with you. It’s something we should be doing together.”
I hate the thought she’s thinking of herself and a lonely future. “I want you darlin’, that’s not changed. I know we haven’t discussed me claimin’ you further, but there’s nothing I want more.”
“I’m not ready for sex.”
“Not what I’m pushing for Mel. It will happen when it happens, you’ve got to get fit and clear your head. The right time will come along, no need to hurry it.”
She sits and turns so she’s facing me. Looks down at her hands, then up into my face. “I think I want children, Ro.”
That’s an easy statement to respond to. “So do I. Sweetheart, I didn’t give a damn who fathered that baby we lost. He was already mine. Can we replace him? Nah, never. He’ll always be a part of our lives even though he was never born. Can we have another little person? Yeah, we can.”
Devil's Dilemma: Satan's Devils MC Colorado Chapter #4 Page 28
