“Lexi?” He looks at Alyssa again.
She’s nodding at him to confirm what he’s seeing. It’s almost like I can hear what she’s trying to say to him, “I know, can you believe it? Lexi’s a girl. Who knew?”
“Hey!” His voice shoots up really high. He clears his throat. “Hey, what’s up?”
“Not much.” I smile wide at him, almost daring him to pretend like he doesn’t notice anything.
“You … um,” he stammers.
“Doesn’t Lexi look ah-mazing?” Alyssa practically squeals. Like I’m some new doll she gets to play with.
He nods. “Yeah, you look great. I, um, need to get …”
Alyssa looks at the clock. “Yikes! We better get going. And, Lexi, can’t wait to talk to you more. You have to teach me how you got your eyelashes so big!”
I give her a smile as she leaves hand in hand with Logan.
“Well, well …” Benny reappears with a mischievous smirk on his face. “Is it me, or did you make Logan speechless?”
I hook my arm around Benny’s as we head to class, and a surge of confidence overcomes me.
“You know, Benny, I think this is going to be a very good week.”
Now I know what it must feel like to be an animal in a zoo. All day people have been studying me in my artificially natural habitat.
I can feel Brooke’s eyes burning into the back of my head during trig. I’m trying to write down an equation on the board, but feel like I need to look glamorous doing it. I think back to another pageant tip Mom always gives Mac: You’re always being judged. I don’t know why, but I find myself puckering my lips a bit. What scares me the most is that it’s almost an automatic reflex.
The bell rings and I decide not to get up right away, but to wait to see if she’ll say something.
She stops in front of me and gives me a little scowl. “Special occasion?”
“Excuse me?” I tilt my head and open my eyes wide to display innocence.
“Why are you dressed … up?”
“Just thought I’d try something different.” And then to get a sarcastic remark from her, I do a little twirl. “Do you like it?”
She shrugs. “Better than you usually look.”
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is probably the best compliment you could hope to receive from Brooke Hanley.
I try to wipe the smile off my face as I walk down the hallway. I see Grant up ahead staring at my legs. I resist the urge to look down and make sure I haven’t gotten any dirt on them, although I’m not sure how that would’ve happened.
By the time Grant’s gaze gets up to my face, it’s clear there’s a bit of confusion as he’s trying to place me. He obviously knows who I am, but he isn’t sure how. He hits Josh’s shoulder to get his attention and points at me. Like, totally pointing at me in the middle of the hallway. Does he not think that I can see him? Does he want me to see him?
I do my best not to stare as Josh and Grant exchange a few words.
Gee, wonder who they’re talking about?
Grant’s eyes get wide as the realization that the girl he was disgusted to even consider going to Homecoming with is the same person whose legs he was just checking out.
I slow my pace slightly as I walk by. I decide to throw him a quick glance over my shoulder, like the ones I’ve seen flirty girls do on TV. Of course, those girls have extras around them who watch where they’re going. I’m not as fortunate and run into someone and nearly fall over in these deathly high heels. I’m sure some people wouldn’t consider three-inch heels deathly, but they might as well be ten feet high with my coordination skills.
I steady myself and walk to my next class. Being careful not to let my legs (or imagination) get ahead of me.
My day of feeling overly paranoid increases as Benny and Cam stop what appears to be a heated conversation as soon I sit down for lunch. My stomach has been in constant knots all day. As soon as I get comfortable in class, the bell rings and I have to go back to parading in the hallway.
“What?” I skip pleasantries and get down to business.
Benny shakes his head a little too forcefully. “Nothing. Just talking about English homework.”
“It’s so obvious when you lie.”
He throws his apple down. “Nothing. It’s just that I overhead some stuff.”
“About me?”
They both stay silent.
“Come on, Benny, you’re responsible for all of this.” It’s clear they’re trying to protect me from something, and I want to know what’s going on. I figure guilt will work. “You know, it’s really great that you’re talking to Chris. I don’t really see why it’s still required for me to be completely humiliated.” What’s weird is that I haven’t really been humiliated today. There’s been lots of talk, but nothing bad, that I’m aware of.
Cam gives me a slight smile. “Oh, you haven’t been humiliated. But you are a hot topic of conversation today.”
“Is it bad?” Another stomach knot forms. I knew that this was a possibility. It’s pretty much what I expected, that people could think that I was a joke.
“Mostly it’s all positive, people saying that you look hot. And you know how guys are.”
“Actually I don’t.” I turn toward Benny.
He throws his hands up. “As if I know what guys are like. I have no idea if this coffee outing I’m having with Chris is a date or not. And I’m a guy. Please.”
Cam sighs. “They’re all like …” Cam makes her voice low, “‘Dude, have you seen Lexi, she’s looking hot, wouldn’t mind getting me a piece of that.’ You know, stupid guy stuff.”
“Really?” I try to not make it known how happy this makes me. “I mean, that’s not all that bad, right?”
Benny claps his hands in excitement. “Of course not! This is awesome, Lex. I bet you’re going to be asked out on a date before the week is through.”
“Really?”
Cam lets out an exasperated sigh. “Do I need to have the boyfriend talk with you again?”
The “boyfriend talk” is one that we’ve had many times. Usually it involves me feeling sorry for myself, and Cam thinking that I’m being ridiculous because it’s the guy’s problem if he can’t see how awesome I am and love me for me. That it’s his issue because he can’t handle a strong woman who has thoughts and opinions.
I hate that excuse when it comes to my status as Consistently Single. That it’s not me. No, of course not. It’s apparently every single straight human being on the planet with a Y chromosome.
I always dutifully listen to Cam when she’s giving me advice on guys since she has way more experience than me, although that’s not hard since I have zero experience. Cam even went to Homecoming last year, and Jeremy Wells tried to go to second base with her. Cam, being Cam, got mad.
At this point, I’d like the opportunity to at least go to bat.
Cam takes my silence as an invitation to start in on the talk. “You have to remember that all those TV shows and movies where the girl meets the guy of her dreams at sixteen is bogus. Just like the shows where a girl has a makeover and all her life’s problems go away. That’s not real life. Guys, and relationships, in high school aren’t like that. Let’s see, I think the most romantic date I’ve been on was when Hunter Perkins took me to dinner and accidentally spilled his soda on my white cardigan. He got me club soda to try to soak up the stain, which was conveniently located on my chest, so he was being a total gentleman in trying to help me wipe it off. Honestly, that’s it. There’s been no swelling of music when they try to make a move on you in the backseat of a car or at a dance. You deserve more.”
Cam continues, “I just don’t understand why someone as awesome as you needs to feel justified by having a guy show interest in you. Plus, what does it say about a guy if he asks you out now because of how you look? All it took is some makeup to be treated the way you should be treated? It’s pathetic.”
“Some makeup? It took me two hours to look like this!”
“Exactly.” She smiles like she’s won another one of her debate team matches.
I guess she’s right. But when you’ve been ignored for as long as I have, you might not mind that this is what it takes to get noticed by a guy. Even if it is a little infuriating.
“Okay, okay.” I give in. There’s no point in arguing with Cam, especially when I know deep down that she’s right. I seriously need to get some friends who’ll let me be the smart one for a change.
I notice Cam and Benny exchange a look.
Cam bites into her sandwich. “Anyways, I’m thinking of going to the bookstore after school if anybody wants to join me.”
Wait a second. They both knew that I wouldn’t be upset that some guys were saying things about me. Something else is going on. I can tell.
“What aren’t you telling me?” I ask firmly.
They look skeptically at each other for a few beats, before Benny gives Cam a small nod.
Cam turns to me. “You know that Brooke is pure evil. Well, she’s trying to start some rumor that you had plastic surgery or something. Nobody believes her.”
Benny agrees. “Yeah, especially since we all know that plastic surgery would require weeks to heal. I only know that thanks to Brooke and her new nose over summer break. You know how easily she gets threatened because of her status as Queen Glamour Girl.”
I guess I should’ve expected as much from Brooke. It was only a matter of time before she set her sights on me. But I find myself more excited than annoyed by her attempts to defame my makeover.
If I’m doing something to make Brooke nervous enough to spread rumors about me, I must be doing something right.
This week is both exhausting and exhilarating. The tireless hours I spend on “Glam Lexi” aren’t fun, but each day at school gets better and better. The whispers turn into actual conversations with people who I didn’t even think knew my name.
By Wednesday, Grant has invited me to his party.
I’m almost expecting confetti to explode and a Congratulations for Finally Being Invited! banner to drop down from the ceiling when he asks me. I know that’s a tad pathetic, but I think it’s normal to want (or crave) the acceptance of the Beautiful People. It almost makes me realize what Mac must feel up on stage looking at the judges, wanting so much for them to literally put her on a pedestal.
Oddly enough, the most difficult part about the process of going to said party is not the tireless hours spent primping each morning — it’s convincing Benny and Cam to go with me.
“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” Benny says for the twentieth time as we head up the sidewalk to Grant’s house on Saturday night.
“We aren’t going to let Lexi go alone, and, need I remind you, this is all your doing,” Cam says to him, also for the twentieth time.
“Yeah,” I agree. “Totally all your fault.” I can’t hide a smile. “So, how do I look?” I twirl around in my skinny jeans, black fitted tank top, and knee-high boots. I spruced up the outfit with silver bangles and a necklace. I’m wearing my hair in loose waves that took me an hour to create.
“Hot. You look hot,” Cam tells me … for the twentieth time.
Okay, maybe none of us is really comfortable with this whole Popular Posse Party thing.
“Are you sure they know I’m coming?” Benny asks.
I shrug. “I don’t really think Grant is one for formal RSVPs. But there was no way I was going to leave you at home.”
Truthfully, I’m a little nervous about the reaction we might get when we arrive. There’s a huge difference between being invited and actually showing up. Of course in my deranged fantasies, when I walk into the Popular Posse Party, I’m greeted with open arms (and an open mouth from Logan). Something tells me that’s not going to happen here.
And that something is the buzz kill called reality.
“Do we knock or just go in?” I ask as I try the doorbell. I can hear the music blaring inside.
The door opens and it’s Hannah. “Oh, hey, Lexi, come on in.” She smiles politely at Cam and Benny.
“Welcome, ladies,” Grant says as he looks over at Benny. “What can I get you girls to drink?”
Benny’s face turns bright red as he looks at the door.
“Hey, Grant, have you met Benny? He’s with us.” I stare at Grant, almost daring him to say something else. Usually it’s Cam who sticks up for us, but I’m not sitting down and staying silent anymore. I put my arm around Benny and start to walk through the house. Cam follows, completely shutting Grant out.
“I told you this was a bad idea,” Benny whispers.
I have to admit that maybe he’s right. It might’ve been unfair to bring Benny here. He gets attacked enough without me dragging him into a lion’s den. I see him button up his plaid shirt so it covers his Knight Rider T-shirt.
“Let’s just make a quick round so people can see us. Then we can leave,” I promise him.
“Look, shelter.” Cam points to a corner of the living room that’s empty, and we decide to hold fort there. I take a look around and see that there are mostly the usual suspects here — Logan (sigh …), Alyssa, Taylor, Brooke — but not a whole lot of other “norms,” if any at all.
Cam seems to be thinking the same thing. “Not as many people as I thought.”
Fortunately, most people just nod at us as we sit down. So the three of us decide to carry on like it’s a typical Saturday night, and we’re in one of our houses goofing around, laughing.
“We want details of last night,” I say to Benny. He was a nervous wreck all day yesterday leading up to his meeting with Chris. “Leave nothing out of your hot date.”
Benny smiles shyly at us. I’m not used to seeing him so censored about his feelings. “It went well, but I don’t really think it was a date.”
“Stop it,” I say. “You’re being silly.” But I can tell by the look on Benny’s face that he’s truly unclear on Chris’s feelings about what yesterday was.
“I don’t know. We had a great time — there wasn’t a lull the entire night. He’s even coming over next weekend to watch the first season of The Facts of Life with me…. It was a TV show.”
“That’s so great that you already have plans,” I tell him. “He wants to see you again, so why don’t you think it was a date?”
“I think he only sees me as a friend. We hugged at the end, which I guess is a good thing since I’ve never kissed a boy before, so I probably would do it wrong.”
“I think kissing is kissing,” I offer, although we both know I have no clue about that subject.
“Regardless, we can’t assume it was a date just because we’re both into boys. It’s like, if a girl and a guy go out, you can assume it’s a date, especially if the guy pays.”
“Well, who paid?” I ask.
“He paid for coffee and I got dessert, but we’re both guys, so …”
“First off,” Cam begins to argue, “guys and girls can be friends without there being anything romantic involved.”
“Yeah, we’re friends.” I counter.
Benny gives me an are-you-being-serious? look. “That’s completely different. Do I really have to remind you that I’m not attracted to girls?”
“I don’t know — you’ve been checking me out a lot this week,” I tease. “But seriously, you’re getting to know him. Who knows where it’ll lead? And I have no doubt that the more he gets to know you, he’d be crazy not to fall for you. Just give it time.”
Benny gives me a weak smile. “I guess. I’ll try to not overanalyze everything and have fun.”
“So, can we stop talking about boys for five seconds?” Cam asks. “Because I’ve finally made a decision.”
My immediate thought is that she wants us to leave the party. And while we aren’t really doing anything, I’m starting to feel comfortable here. Sure we’re being ignored, but at least I can say that I was here, that I was invited. Although the only people I’d say this to are the ones sitting right next t
o me.
“Is this about school?” Benny asks.
Cam’s parents have been pressuring her to graduate early even though she hasn’t applied to any colleges yet. She’s already taken all the hardest classes in school, she has enough credits to graduate, but there’s something holding her back.
“Yeah … I …”
Both Benny and I find ourselves leaning in. Anytime either one of us has brought it up, she’s changed the subject.
“Well —” She takes a deep breath. It’s very disconcerting to see Cam self-conscious about something. “I’m not going to graduate this year. I’m staying.”
A swell of relief spreads over me. As much as I want Cam to do what’s best for her, I can’t help but focus on the fact that her staying here would be best for me.
“Is that what you want?” I ask, guilty for even thinking about myself for a split second during this important decision for her.
She nods. “Yeah, well … I took a little too long and all the decent schools’ deadlines have already passed. But I’m thinking that maybe me dragging my heels was really because I’m not ready to —”
“Oh my God.” Benny’s looking right past Cam and has a huge grin on his face. “Um, Lex, I think you have an admirer.”
I turn around and see Taylor looking over at me. He raises his glass when our eyes meet.
“You should go over there,” Benny prods.
“And do what?”
I turn to Cam for guidance, but she looks mad. I give her a what-should-I-do? look. She groans. “Oh, I don’t know. Talk to him. Didn’t you guys talk the other day when you waited on him?”
“Yeah, but there weren’t a whole lot of sparks that flew during ‘can I get you another size?’”
She lets out a little sigh. “You dragged us here. The least you could do is talk to somebody.”
“Yeah!” Benny interjects. “And I thought the two of you looked so cute the other day. You have to go over there and single-handedly save this social black hole of an evening.”
I’m about to get up, when I realize that I can’t make this too easy on Benny.
“Fine, but only if you ask Chris out on a real date.”
Revenge of the Girl With the Great Personality Page 7
