by M. Malone
“Why are you in my room?”
She stood stiff, openly staring at me. “I was shocked when I saw the stuffed toy. It brought back—all those memories.” She was shaking on her feet and was playing with her fingernails. “I just—it’s been so long. I thought they killed you. That’s what Colin said he was going to do when they tossed me over the bridge… and I thought you were dead... or worse.”
I stared at her. I knew if I took a step, even one step closer, I’d be sucked into her orbit, and I’d be trying out all those awesome skills I’d just learned. “I don’t believe you.”
She put a hand over her heart. “It’s me, Gigi. I carried that Tigger around with me everywhere. You used to insist that I needed to learn to keep it clean or else I was going to get sick. And then you’d take it from me in the mornings sometimes and wash it, so that it would be. I remember that.”
My heart squeezed. I had done that. But there was no way, no how, that this could be her.
But what if it is her?
I knew better. In my line of work, what ifs could get you killed, but I still couldn’t help myself. I had to ask. “Where have you been?”
She inhaled deeply. “Being tossed over that bridge was the worst and best thing that’s ever happened to me. I thought I was going to die. I couldn’t swim, and I thrashed around in the water. The water was cold and tasted funny. I couldn’t navigate how to swim or get to the bank or anything like that. I was so scared. It was black and… I don’t know. I think a part of me just gave up. I was pretty sure I was dead.”
I swallowed hard. “So where were you?”
“All I remember is being pulled out of the water. There was this woman— She was one of those women who look like they walk along the river during lunch: Chic. Beautiful. She was working near there or something. She called a nearby jogger to help pull me out of the water.”
I frowned, trying to ascertain the truth of her statements. Was she lying? If she was, she was too good of a liar.
“I had no family. And I pretty much refused to go to the police. I freaked out when they even suggested that they’d send me to a hospital. I knew how the Family operated. I knew I’d end up right back in their hands. So I told them I would run if they called the police. The woman, she was a sort of social worker or something. She called a friend with child protection. They got me a place to stay for the night, but to make a long story short, she took me in. She eventually adopted me. She and her husband, they were really lovely. Eventually, she returned to where she was from, New York. My adoptive father passed away. She remarried, and the guy is a real prick.” She vaguely gestured to her face. “That’s my sad sack of a story. What about you? Where have you been? I tried to find you after I was brought to America. I— was told you were dead.”
My gut knotted. There was a part of me that wanted to believe her story. There was something so sincere in her voice. I wanted to trust it. But you know better. “I never stopped mourning you. Ever. I would have come looking for you. You know that. But I couldn’t. A few days after they tossed you over that bridge, they sold me. I never saw any of them again.”
16
Gemma
My heart skipped a beat.
They sold me.
When I was finally able to breathe again, I pressed a hand over my heart as if checking the organ was still intact. They’d sold him? I closed my eyes, caught between keeping my composure and mourning the sweet, protective boy he’d once been. I still remembered what he’d told Colin. That he intended to sell me himself. Deep down, I’d known it was a lie. I’d known he was trying to protect me at the time.
But maybe he’d just chosen to protect himself. All these years, I’d missed him but also carried such anger. He’d promised to protect me and then just disappeared. I’d thought he’d escaped and run without looking back.
Instead he’d suffered a fate almost worse than death.
“Sold you to who?” I clamped my lips shut when my voice cracked. This wasn’t the time to succumb to emotion. Not when there was so much to do and so little time.
I looked away. My question hung in the air unanswered but I didn’t ask again. Although I knew where his story ended—he had been an ORUS agent after all—I wasn’t sure I could handle hearing his journey to get there. Knowing the sick, twisted wankers who’d been chasing us that night, they’d probably sold him off to one of the ponces who liked young boys. To teach him a lesson.
To break him.
“Look, it’s been a long night. Maybe we should get you settled in your room.”
I sighed but then glanced behind me. The little stuffed Tigger stared back at me accusingly. Could I really walk away and leave him like this when he was obviously upset? Plus it wasn’t like I was in the best frame of mind either. It was a scary but thrilling thing to have him back, to know that all these years he’d been missing me, too.
“I really missed you, Matt.”
My soft declaration seemed to break down the last of his defenses. Matthias grabbed me and pulled me close, burying his face in my hair. Stunned, I didn't know what to do, so I let him. After a few moments, I found myself softening, and all of the emotions I tried to hide came barreling back. Years’ worth of tears and frustration were no match for the stoic façade I’d cultivated.
"I have replayed that day, over and over," I whispered. "I thought you were gone forever."
That seemed to bring Matthias out of his grief. "If I could've gotten to you, nothing would have stopped me. But you were gone. I saw you face down in the water, not moving. They made me watch the river carry you away. I knew you couldn’t swim.” He shook his head. “I haven't been the same since. I think I died with you that day."
I hugged him tighter. "Do you think this is fate? Or the universe or whatever?"
"Bugger if I know," Matthias muttered. "As far as I’m concerned the universe can kiss my arse. It took you from me once. But I'll never let you go again."
His head lowered, and I knew this was the moment when everything would change. There were so many reasons to run. He had no idea I was here on a mission. My loyalty in the present was at war with the emotions from the past.
But none of that mattered. All I could think of was that this was Matt. My Matt. And all of the feelings I had for him as a young girl had morphed and changed into something very different. Now he was so much more than just a protector. He was a man who intrigued and aroused me. The fact that I'd loved him so much once upon a time only added another layer of explosiveness to the chemistry burning between us now.
"I don't want you to let me go. I've never wanted that." I knew the effect of my words. Sure enough, his eyes darkened, and the intensity there made my breath catch.
Was I really going to do this? I wanted him. I needed him. I would find a way to protect us both…and Sabine. I couldn’t let him go.
Then his head lowered and our lips touched, and I thought, I’m never letting him go.
It was a fantasy come to life. His lips were soft yet firm, and as his mouth moved over mine, I was all sensation. Even my skin felt like it was on fire, competing with the firecrackers in my blood. Matthias was just as intense as always. His strong arms locked behind my back, holding me in place. It was a strange thrill knowing that he wouldn't let me go.
Since when was I into cavemen? But I couldn't deny that I'd happily let him take me back to his cave as long as his mouth didn't stop what it was doing to my neck.
"That feels so good, Matt," I whispered.
Suddenly he pulled back. "My name really is Matthias. Mum shortened it when we went to live with the Family. I never got to tell you that before. I always regretted it. Everyone went by aliases back then, but I always wished that I'd been able to tell you before…"
I understood what he wasn't saying. Back then telling someone your name was a huge act of trust. As a child, I wouldn’t have understood the importance of keeping it a secret, so I didn't blame him for not telling me. But I was thankful that he was sharing i
t now.
"Before it was too late," I finished for him.
"Yeah," he breathed.
I tugged at the front of his shirt, and he immediately pulled it over his head.
“Damn,” I whispered appreciatively, noticing his dick twitching at my words. He liked that.
Matthias gripped his cock and squeezed. Then his eyes flew open and widened when my fingers covered his.
“Let me,” I murmured right before I began to stroke him through the fabric of his jeans. Then I unzipped him and reached inside his boxers. When my eyes saw what was waiting for me, I paused. “Holy shit.”
I glanced up at him, but his face was closed off. Did he think that I would be turned off? I reached down and gripped him firmly before sliding the tip of my finger gently over the Prince Albert piercing in the head of his cock.
“Well this is a surprise.” I rubbed the pre-cum that was steadily leaking from the tip. “I wonder what that’s going to feel like.” Then I hooked my hands in the sides of his jeans and boxers and gently tugged them down.
“You don’t mind?” he whispered, seeming almost afraid to hear the answer.
“No. I mean, it’s not like I know anything about this stuff, but I’ve heard piercings feel good.”
“You don’t know anything about this stuff?” Matthias repeated.
I shook my head, sure my face was red. “I’ve never done this before. I mean, I’ve fooled around and stuff, but I don’t really know what I’m doing.”
Matthias nuzzled me, the gentle caress calming my fears.
“It’s okay. I don’t know either. That’s why… what happened last night…happened. I haven’t… done this before.”
That was a shock, but I had a feeling that if I showed any surprise, he’d run out of there the same way he had last night. So I just resumed tugging at his jeans.
He stepped away to help me and shoved them down along with his boxers. I stared at him in his full glory. Sweet baby Jesus at Tea Time, he was huge and gorgeous and...huge.
He backed me up to the bed and I scooted back to accommodate him. He pushed up on his arms to help me and then kicked them off and over the side of the bed.
“You really haven’t done this before?” I finally asked. When he nodded, I grinned. “That makes me feel better then. I thought you ran off because I wasn’t doing something right.”
“You’re right just by breathing,” Matthias growled. Then he groaned as my hand tightened around his cock. “Although if you keep doing that, we’ll have a repeat of last night and then where will we be?”
“Hmm, let’s find out, shall we?” I slid a hand into his hair and then pulled him down for a kiss. As soon as our lips met, my hand started moving again and Matthias moaned helplessly into my mouth.
He was huge in my hand, and I could only hope I was doing it right. I’d only given one hand job before, and it hadn’t been like this. Everything with Matthias was more intense, and I loved it.
I loved him. Always.
At the thought, my hand clenched around him and he exploded, his hips pumping desperately as he moaned again and again.
He kept his eyes closed for a long time, like he didn’t want to meet my gaze. But when he finally did, I raised my fingers to my mouth and licked delicately. His taste was slightly salty and made me crave the thought of him in my mouth. Matthias let out a strangled sound as he watched me lick my fingers.
And he was back. Instant hard-on.
“Would you look at that?” I smiled devilishly. “Not a bad start at all.”
“I am so damn glad you’re alive,” Matthias blurted. “Sorry, that’s a bit of a mood killer.”
I just smiled and rested my head against his chest.
"It’s okay. I’m pretty damn glad you’re alive too. And that we found each other again."
"Yes. Yes we did." He scrambled off the bed and then bent down and picked me up, the sudden movement taking me off guard.
"Whoa. Where are we going?" I wrapped my arms around his neck. Not that I was worried he would drop me. I let my eyes roam over the defined muscles in his arms and chest. My childhood friend had turned into a well-built man.
"First, to the bathroom so I can put some cream on these bruises. Then back to bed." His dark eyes fixed on mine. "Where you belong."
I gulped. A sharp stab of longing raced through me, shocking my nipples into sharp points and inducing a tight throb between my legs. It was overwhelming to be the focus of his complete attention, but this was what I'd been hoping for when I came here, right?
Now the only question was could I handle what I'd come for?
Matthias
I was in way over my head. But I’d also never felt more sure.
My heart was a drumbeat in my ears as I carried Gemma to the bathroom. She’d been stiff at first but slowly relaxed into my hold. When she rested her head against my neck and emitted a soft, relieved sigh, I’d almost come again. What the hell was it about this girl? Yes, we’d been special to each other years ago, but she had a hold on me unlike any other. Just the thought of her not being taken care of or not having something she needed sent my protective instincts into the red zone.
There was a driving beat inside me insisting that I take care of her. Protect her.
Pleasure her.
My face flamed at the thought, especially since I still had the smell of the sex club all over me. Somehow it seemed utterly wrong to have any part of that place touching Gemma. Rafe had been right. It wasn’t what I thought it would be, but I wanted this to only be about us. I wanted her to have only the very best. The last thing she needed right now was some inept guy slobbering all over her.
It didn’t keep my lips from connecting with her forehead as I set her down carefully on the counter in the bathroom.
The bruising on her face looked even worse under the harsh fluorescent lighting, but she was still absolutely perfect.
“You always were the most beautiful girl I’d ever seen.”
Her eyes crinkled as she smiled. “You used to tell me that all the time. Total rubbish but it made me feel like a princess.”
I pulled a tube of arnica from beneath the cabinet and then uncapped it. “It was nothing but truth.”
She flinched when I placed my finger on her cheek. Then she leaned back slightly and pulled the shirt she was wearing over her head, leaving her in nothing but a plain black, cotton bra.
“It’s ok. Go ahead,” she said. I glanced up to find her watching me, her eyes following my every action greedily.
Fuck. She really was trying to kill me.
I paused then stroked the cream gently over the bruise that was currently somewhere between green and yellow. Rage flirted with the edge of my consciousness, and it was a true feat of strength that I ignored it. Ever since I’d seen the bruises on her face and then the others dotted over her ribs and thighs, I’d wanted to find her bastard of a stepfather and kick his ass.
“They don’t hurt anymore,” she stated, clearly tuning in to my distress. She’d always been able to do that, calm me down when I was on the verge of losing it.
“You should never have to be hurt. Ever. I’d like to find the bastard who did this to you and show him what’s for.”
Her lips quirked at that, almost as if she was amused. But then her arms wound around my neck and I stopped thinking.
“Why did you run last night?”
I stilled. “Blimey, Gemma. I came on your leg before we could even get things started.”
Her eyes rounded. “Is that why you left? That didn’t bother me at all.”
She bit her lip, and the sight of her rolling the plump flesh between her teeth had my cock going ramrod straight.
“I actually thought that was pretty hot. Like you were so into me that you lost all control,” she finished, peeking up at me through the wild waves of hair flopping over her forehead.
I barely heard her words before my lips were on hers again. This time she clearly wasn’t content to be passive th
ough because Gemma wrapped her legs around my waist, gripping me so tightly that I couldn’t have escaped if I’d wanted.
But escape was the last thing on my mind. No, I was drunk on the way she looked at me and drowning in the soft sounds she made and the gentle caresses of her fingers in my hair.
I turned, my hands automatically going under her bottom to hold her steady. I could barely tell where I was going; it was pure muscle memory that got me from the bathroom back to my bed. But as soon as her back hit the mattress, Gemma let out another one of those arousing moans that almost made me come.
But I wasn’t going to do that. This time, I was going to make sure we were both satisfied.
“You’re so soft, Gemma. Everywhere.” I was honored to touch the skin above her bra, the smooth skin tempting my fingers. She smelled warm, like something fresh-baked, and my mouth watered. No artificial fragrances for Gemma, just clean skin and woman.
I had never been more aroused in my life.
“I love the way you touch me.” Gemma’s mouth fell open as my lips followed my fingers.
I struggled for a few seconds but finally got her bra unhooked, and her small breasts were revealed. I lost my breath looking at the perky little nipples just begging for my mouth. I’d never forget the helpless, needy sound she made when I latched on. Her hands lodged in my hair, and her hips moved restlessly underneath me as she rubbed her core right against my stomach.
“Matthias!” Her eyes were languorous as she watched me dot kisses over her breasts and belly. I was sure this was all moving too fast, but nothing could stop this freight train now. Everything about Gemma was calling to me, enticing me. I needed to be inside her, to plant a mark and claim her.
In a flurry of movement, I stripped her of her remaining clothes, and we laughed breathlessly as we got tangled in the sheets. I kissed her until she was gasping, so overcome with happiness that I was sharing this first, awkward but magical moment with her. For the first time, I wasn’t shamed or nervous. With Gemma, it was okay not to know everything because she’d always accepted me just the way I was.
