Only sixteen days until your trip to NY. Of course I’ve got a calendar alert set!
Are you having second thoughts on the key chains?
I’m thinking that pressed flowers might be better. What do you think? We could send them back and forth in books.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Collections
So would our collection be BOOKS or PRESSED FLOWERS? I feel like this might be a way to trick me into joining your reading club.
I’m not falling for that, Night Owl.
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Collections
Ha! I swear to you I wasn’t tricking you, Dogfish.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Collections
K. I believe you. I think.
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Collections
I’ve been reading about the pressed flowers. It’s actually considered a craft. That’s different from a collection. Maybe it’s even better!
I just discovered that Emily Dickinson (the famous poet) probably had agoraphobia, because it doesn’t sound like she left her yard very much. She had what’s called a “herbarium,” which is a collection of pressed plants in an album. She did this when she was only fourteen years old. And she ended up with four hundred different specimens!
This project would have made a great college application essay for her, but I don’t know if they had that back in her time.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Collections
So are we pressing PLANTS or FLOWERS?
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: re: Collections
You know what we are? Flower girls.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Flower Girls
Flower Girls. Cool. FGs.
I was just thinking that it would be interesting to press a tree (small) but also very hard + then I thought, wait, isn’t that what paper is?
I’m trying to press some dandelions. The problem is that I keep lifting up the books to check on the progress. It’s very messy.
Here’s another thing that’s messy. I asked my dad if he was going to CALL YOUR DAD while we were on our NYC trip, even to say hi. He said, “No, Bett, I’m not. You know that. That relationship is over + in the past now. So please STOP.”
What a bad attitude! But he has been doing a lot of yoga, so I said, “Dad, are you taking yoga classes because it’s relaxing you + that’s helping you get over Sam?”
He got all mad + said, “Of course not. I’ve been over Sam for months now.”
So that means FOR SURE it’s why he’s doing yoga!
WHEN are you going to see if YOUR DAD WILL GO WITH YOU to the play on opening night?
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Re: Flower Girls
I’m still waiting for the right time to ask. But if I can’t make him go to the opening night it’s going to be work for us to get them to “accidentally” bump into each other on the street, even with cell phones and the world of technology and all of our planning, which could include a frozen hot chocolate meeting.
Right now I’m pressing a crocus.
It’s challenging.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: re: Flower Girls
I think that BOB can now be USED to help us. Maybe you could say you WANT Bob to get to know your mom’s work. That might lead your dad to believe you’re INTO the idea of Bob.
Maybe then he would go to the play?
I’ll try to come up with other ideas if this one seems bad to you.
FYI. I added a second dandelion, which is what’s called a blowball. It’s the big white cluster with the seeds. It’s doing WAY better than the yellow dandelion flower.
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Final plan
I can’t sleep. It’s not my usual insomnia brought on by worrying about things like climate change or flesh-eating bacteria. (Both on the rise.) I don’t think about that stuff as much anymore at night. It started to get a little repetitive.
I can’t sleep because things are really heating up with Papa and the Palindrome. They went out last night at midnight for dumplings.
Only people who are getting serious do those kinds of things, because it means one person has a craving and the other person gives in to that.
I didn’t know a dandelion seed head was called a blowball. But that makes sense.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: Final plan
THAT’S SUPER-BAD NEWS about Bob + the midnight dumplings. But you are lucky you live close to a place that stays open that late. I really love pan-fried dumplings (better than steamed, which can be mushy).
I had a new idea. What about using your BIRTHDAY (coming up!) to get your dad to the play. Make it a birthday WISH that you could go together. You could just casually say, “You know what I’d like, Papa? If you + I could go see Kristina’s play together. It would mean a lot as I turn thirteen + become a teenager. Also, that might be a fun thing for us to do with Bob.”
Our dads last saw each other when they were at the airport in China, still getting over their lost passports. This is a very bad association memory. No wonder they broke up.
xo
Dogfish
P.S. Fun fact that Angel told me: The French words dent de lion are why the weeds are called dandelions. She said it means “tooth of a lion.” Angel’s very into where words come from. You’d like her.
* * *
From: Betty Devlin
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: You’re almost here
I’m just rotating in my shell waiting for you! Who would have thought that I’d be living in New York City and starring in a play?
Here’s what my days are now like. I haul myself out of bed and take the elevator downstairs. I get my coffee with Dinos. He brews a pot for the workers, but he doesn’t mind if I head back into the mail area and help myself to a big cup. Dinos is the morning doorman. The doormen are in a union. Not a union like they’re a couple, but the worker kind. Your grandpa would’ve loved to see it. He was a union man to the core.
I made my famous peanut brittle last week and Dinos was the first person to get some. He’s from Greece and just the sweetest. But he chipped a crown on his second bite! We’re still friends because he’s got great dental insurance. After we chew the fat (and sort the mail) I go back upstairs and take out my curlers. Once I’ve got my hair done up it’s almost rehearsal time.
Once a week our Avery comes to visit Kristina. Since she’s right across the hall she always stops in. Last time she brought over a locket and put a picture of herself on one side and you on the other. That sweet girl gave it to me, and I’m proud to say I haven’t taken it off even though my hair gets all twisted on the clasp.
Okay! I’m counting the days till we’re
together. Hugs and bugs!
Your Gaga
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Victory
It’s done. Papa asked what I want to do for my birthday, and I told him I’d like him to go with me to see the opening of Kristina’s play. I put on a faraway, dreamy face to make it seem like it was something impossible.
At first he said, “No. I can’t. I’m not going to give a public show of support to Kristina.”
I answered, “You’d be going to support me.”
It was a great response because he just stopped talking.
Then I brought in the final thing. I managed to get tears in my eyes (mostly because I was thinking about how Bob was making this a lot harder for you and me), and in a really quiet, kind of younger version of my voice I said, “I was hoping you’d ask Bob to come with us.”
Papa looked surprised. I ended with, “If you and Bob want to go with me, Kristina would like to give us seats. Orchestra. Right in the center.”
He said he’d think about it. But he went down the hall and I heard him making a phone call.
It was to Bob. And he said, “Hey, you. Want to go to a play?”
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: A Fake Date
BEST NEWS EVER! I told Gaga that on opening night our dads will see each other + after all this time apart it will be a positive trigger for both of them.
Gaga said, “I just hope one of them doesn’t PULL A TRIGGER on the other!”
She was just being Gaga because of course we are all for gun control.
So then I said your dad was bringing a guy named BOB BILDERBACK to the play + we were worried Bob would hurt our chances for the trigger moment between our dads, but it was a risk we had to take.
Gaga hung up + went across the hall to Kristina’s. She called me back 20 minutes later to say that Kristina has a great idea. She thinks that my dad should ALSO LOOK LIKE HE’S WITH SOMEONE ON OPENING NIGHT of the play! So she’s going to get another ticket + make sure to get a great guy sitting in that seat.
She said that there’s one thing she knows about your dad: “He’s a competitor + a jealous man.”
Do you think that’s true?
Kristina says YOUR dad will flip out when he sees MY dad next to this AMAZING GUY. I don’t know his name yet, but the person she’s thinking about is from Cuba + he’s a dancer + everyone in the theater world is talking about him. He hasn’t been in America that long, but he’s really good at English, and besides, MY DAD speaks Spanish.
Also, Kristina says that there is a PARTY after the opening night show + that we should try to get the DADS + THE DECOYS there.
There is only one problem now. HOW do we tell my dad that he has a FAKE DATE to the play?
Let me know if you have any ideas. I’m hoping to get them to hold hands, since if your dad is really competitive + a jealous man that could totally set things in motion.
I’m pressing a wildflower that has a star in the middle + I was remembering how we had to learn to DRAW A STAR when we were little but not lift the pencil. Did you have to learn to do that?
I wish we did stuff like that now. Those were the days.
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Javier
Kristina is really coming through for us! The fake date said yes! His name is Javier Martinez and he said he’s up for the adventure, just as long as he can be on his own at the after-party. But before that he promises to be very into your dad. How awesome is this guy?
My dad is going to be so jealous. Bob will be so boring compared to Javier, but more to the point, compared to your dad.
Maybe one day we will tell them we were the matchmakers. We could even reveal it during the toasts at their wedding.
Lots of love from your (hopefully) future sister,
xo
Night Owl
P.S. Working on pressing a tulip. Degree of difficulty = 10. And yes, we also had to learn to do the star without lifting the pencil. I think it’s to teach coordination. Or maybe to give the teachers some time to themselves.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: Javier
Javier Martinez is an AMAZING secret weapon to get our dads back together. I read about him. He’s a big deal dancer for the BALLET HISPÁNICO.
His bio says that he grew up in Cuba without toys. But he loved all kinds of sports + swam in the ocean every day (not fun for you, but for most people). His mom put him in a ballet program one summer, only really it was because they served hot lunch.
Javier knows Kristina because they might do a project together. Also, he’s met Gaga. He came over to the apartment. She speaks Spanish + I guess they had a fun time.
Can you believe how this is all going so GREAT?
Except for Bob Bilderback existing + also our dads not liking each other anymore.
I tried to press a water lily. Bad idea. Do not attempt. I stuck it in a book. Good thing I’d already read it + wasn’t a big fan. (Dystopian + really depressing. Who needs it?)
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Re: re: Javier
Yes, Javier Martinez is a great guy to be sitting next to your dad at the play. Everyone will notice him since he’s like a statue come to life, and his man-bun is very cool.
I had a thought: What if Bob Bilderback falls for the Cuban dancer?
Two birds, one stone!
That’s such a violent expression. I mean, who throws rocks at birds? And the idea of using one rock to take down two birds is just horrifying. But I’m guessing the stone was fired in a slingshot in medieval times.
We’re so lucky we live now, and not just because of the advancements in the medical field, but because who wants to carry around a slingshot? Also, we have better hygiene now.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: re: re: Javier
Hygiene issues in olden times were probably horrible. What did women do each month when they got their “leprechaun”? Did they have to use hay?
Also, when were tampons even invented?
What did they do for the zillion years before that?
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: Medieval hygiene and healthcare
I just read online that in medieval times, guess what women used instead of pads or tampons?
Moss. I’m writing this twice because you probably don’t believe it: moss.
I don’t even understand how that would work. And how do they know these things? Did people “journal” about their monthly moss usage?
I feel totally ill now thinking about it.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: Medieval hygiene and healthcare
The moss is a horrible fact to know. I will never sit on a mossy hill the same way.
All of this has me thinking: I know that my dad + your dad had a FAVORITE SONG when they were together + that it was “IT’S OUR TIME” by the Eye Sockets.
I’ll try to learn to play it on the recorder (only when Dad’s not home). See if you can learn it on your cello. We may need to break into song at some point to help with the mood.
See you soon, under a New York moon.
* * *
From: A. Allenberry Bloom
To: Bett Devlin
Subject: It’s our time
I think it’s better if we sing their song.
We don’t have a lot of flexibility with the recorder and the cello. It means we would have to be dragging around the instruments and that’s not very practical in the city. If we just sang “It’s Our Time” at the right moment in two-part harmony that could be very effective.
Can you sing like an angel? By that I just mean soprano. I know you said you don’t have the greatest singing voice, but it’s really about getting the words right. I’ll carry the tune.
* * *
From: Bett Devlin
To: A. Allenberry Bloom
Subject: Re: It’s our time
Dad got a haircut today + he did some crunches!
This means he wants to look his best for the New York trip, which is a VERY GOOD SIGN.
Final question: When exactly are you thinking we sing the song? I mean, IF we sing it.
Okay, that’s it for now. See you in only 3 days!
Yours in crime,
Dogfish
* * *
From: Kristina Allenberry
To: Javier Martinez
Subject: Tomorrow night
Excited for tomorrow. You never know how a performance will go, but I’ve got a good feeling.
It will be the first time experiencing a NY opening with my daughter. And having Bett (Gaga’s granddaughter) and you there, too, will be awesome. I’m hoping Sam stays under control. He now has Bob.
The girls are so desperate for Sam and Marlow to give it another chance. I’m not saying I have any idea how that would even work, but at least with you there the math is balanced. I owe you, Javier.
To Night Owl From Dogfish Page 13
