by Em Petrova
God, they had no idea about the lows Buck was feeling right now. The place where Channing had invaded his heart seemed like a chasm. He yanked off his hat and ran his fingers through his hair. What the hell was he going to tell his family?
They loved Channing. She’d come into his life right after his father had passed away. She’d held them together like a glue with an unbreakable bond. He’d gotten closer to his sister and brothers, and much of the reason was Channing. She’d been such a part of their family that she wouldn’t allow him to hide as he normally would.
Her words revolved through his head. Better to end things now than when we have two kids…
She was right. What they shared didn’t have staying power. He’d just have to be honest with his family and tell them she’d left.
As he thought of not feeling her warm curves tucked up against him at night, that hole in his chest ached—and swelled into a throb. Finally, he jammed his hat back on his head and went down to the bar. What he needed was whiskey.
Five minutes later, after he’d knocked back two shots, he met the stares of his family members.
“What the hell’s up with you, Buck?” Ryder asked. Second in age and only fifteen months apart, he and Ryder had grown up as close as twins. Their mother had a hell of a time taming them, and they’d gotten into more mischief than two greased pigs.
But right now Buck wasn’t ready to do more than grunt. The whiskey hadn’t worked its way into his system yet.
Wynonna blinked at him like a cat. Her almond-shaped eyes mimicked one, and her thick red hair might be a throw-back to an ancestor but Buck thought she looked more like a tiger about to pounce. She leaned in and stared into his eyes. “Now isn’t the time to keep things from your family.”
“She’s right. We can’t have secrets right now. If we’re really signing this contract and going forward with Rope ‘n Ride, we need to—” West was cut off.
“Wait. I thought it was Rodeo Realities,” Buck interrupted.
“Production changed it already. Something about the word realities getting bad response from viewer surveys.”
Jesus, was this to be their lives from now on? Standings, ranks, polls. Their worlds would be dictated by viewers.
He pushed out a sigh and told them the only bit of information they’d find out for themselves. “Asher went home to take care of a family issue.”
“I hope nothing’s wrong,” Wynonna said.
“It’s fine. We have a week before the next event.”
“That’s something else the crew decided before you came down to join us,” West said. “They’re going to begin production the day of the Waco rodeo.”
“Shit, that soon?” He wasn’t prepared for this. It felt as if a snowball had run over him and he was rolling downhill—fast and out of control. He needed to put on the brakes. First, he’d tell his family about Channing.
Resting his elbows on the table, he looked from face to face.
“Oh no.” Ridge gave a shake of his head.
“Here it comes,” West added.
“He’s not going to sign and we won’t have a show. Do you realize how much money we can make off this, Buck? We’ll have enough to buy out Ennis in a few months.” Lane looked about to punch somebody—namely Buck. Lane was the most explosive of the Calhouns, after all. He and Buck had gone a few rounds in their early adulthood, but they were well-matched and their ma had broken up the fights before they could see just who came out on top.
Buck wasn’t against finding out now.
“I’m not shutting down this idea. I don’t relish the idea of cameras following me when I take a piss, but I understand what this can do for us.” He pushed out a breath and met his brother Ryder’s gaze. “It’s Channing. She broke things off.”
Eyes bulged. Wynonna made a noise that sounded like a sob.
Buck clenched and unclenched his fists on the tabletop. “Things haven’t been great with us, and I know it’s upsetting to all of you because you accepted her as a Calhoun.”
“And she won’t be a Calhoun?” Wynonna asked as if her stunned brain couldn’t take in the information. Wait until they heard about Asher’s wife.
Buck shook his head. “No, she won’t be a Calhoun.”
“This is going to cause another issue, brother.” Lane shared the same almond-shaped eyes as their sister but instead of blinking at him like a cat, he was able to give Buck a death glare not uncommon to the species.
Oh here it comes. Buck waved at a passing waitress and ordered another shot of whiskey. “What’s the issue?”
Wynonna spoke up. “Channing’s already in the contract. Production thinks having a weddin’ as a season finale is going to give us the biggest show on TV. She can’t back out of the Calhoun family now.”
Chapter Two
Channing reached into her bag of belongings and pulled out a bottle of shower gel. She groaned. Buck’s shower gel. She must have accidentally grabbed it when getting her possessions from his place.
Walking into his room where they’d shared so many good times had sliced her deep. While removing her clothing from the closet, she’d started crying. By the time she’d hit the bathroom suite tears had blinded her. No wonder she’d come away with his shower gel.
That left her pink Himalayan salt and water lily gel for him to use.
She smirked sadly and placed his gel on the small table that caught all her junk she didn’t want to deal with yet. Glancing down at the platinum and diamond engagement ring on her finger, she figured this was as good a place as any.
She wiggled the ring off and set it beside the gel. Sometime she’d return them—maybe on a day when she knew he was on the road, traveling to the next competition.
As she went about tidying up her place, she realized just how much she’d neglected it lately. She’d been practically living with Buck. Being part of the big family had renewed her. Her own family troubles had faded slightly to the background, but now they glared at her.
After Asher confiding about his wife, Channing could no longer ignore her brother. Luke had been a punk-ass kid growing up but his brains had gotten him into a good college. He’d been dedicated to his education, and Channing had been proud of him until his true reasons for being there were revealed to her.
He was running an illegal gambling ring. When the university got wind and disbanded it, they’d also kicked him out. Which had sent him on a bender of gambling, and last she knew he was tens of thousands of dollars in debt.
Luke had actually come to her several weeks before to beg her to help him. But her job as wait-staff in the various rodeos wasn’t going to help him one bit. Hell, it hardly paid her rent and for things like body wash.
She pushed out a sigh. Guilt filled her. She shouldn’t have turned her brother away. The Calhouns had taught her family was everything, and they would do anything in their power to assist one of their own.
But where to start? First, she’d get a real job rather than temporary waitressing gigs and following Buck around the country. Once she had a better income stream, she might be able to put some aside to help Luke.
She drifted back to the table where her diamond ring sat. It wouldn’t be worth a huge sum, but it might do Luke some good.
But no, the jewelry belonged to Buck. He could pawn it and use the money toward his own messy family issue.
Just looking at the ring brought tears to her eyes. If only things had been different… But he was too cool and emotionless for her needs. She wanted the whole package—best friend, lover and partner in life.
When Buck had swung her into his arms and kissed her breathless the first time, she’d fallen desperately in love with him. What wasn’t to love? His mussed brown hair shot with blond from the sun had begged for her fingers to touch it. Chiseled abs and chest from working hard on his family’s ranch. Roped biceps that had flexed around her as he drove his cock into her pussy…
She swallowed hard and skimmed a finger over the ring. He’d proposed
on a summer night in the back of his truck. Parked in the middle of a field surrounded by peeper frogs and crickets, he’d looked into her eyes and declared his love and asked her to be his wife.
She drew her hand away and found it a little unsteady. She had to give herself some time to recover from this loss, even if she had done the breaking up.
As she returned to putting away her belongings and picking up too many tissues from the nightstand by her bed, her doorbell buzzed.
It better not be my mother. She wasn’t ready to talk about her ending things with Buck and if it was Luke—
She opened the door and found trouble standing in front of her, long legs clad in worn denim, a shiny new belt buckle from the Fort Worth rodeo win at his waist and a pristine white T-shirt clinging to his carved muscles.
When she looked at his face, her insides did a tango. She wanted him—bad. How easy would it be to drag him inside, take him to bed and not surface from their problems?
“Buck.” Her voice was too breathy.
“Hi, Channing. Can I come in?” His Oklahoma twang raised a flutter deep in her belly. As soon as she allowed him into her space, she had to fold her hands into fists to keep from touching him.
Sparks flew between their gazes, but that was expected. They had no problem in the attraction department. It was the other stuff getting in the way of their future.
He tore his gaze away and let it trail over the bottle of his shower gel she’d taken from his house. “I see where my body wash went now. I was left to use something with pink Himalayan salt and water lily.” He raised a forearm and sniffed it.
God, he was adorable. But why couldn’t he be more like his brothers—open and generous with things like smiles?
Her heart gave a hard pinch, reminding her of what she’d given up.
“I’m sorry I grabbed your soap by accident. Here you go.” When she lifted the bottle, the ring slid across the surface of the table.
Buck stilled, his attention zeroed in on that ring.
“I…should have given you this back that day in the hotel. Here.” She started to thrust the circle of platinum at him, but he held up a hand.
“Channing—”
“No, really, Buck. You take it. Sell it and use the money for—”
“Please, just hear me out.”
Their gazes collided again, and she dropped her hand to her side, the ring clenched so hard in her fist that it must be imprinting itself in her palm.
“Can we sit down and talk?” He waved toward her small seating group. She gave a nod and he moved to sit on the sofa. She took the thrift store chair adjacent to him, too aware of the lines of his body. Everything about Buck called to her. God, she was so in love with him. Why couldn’t he just soften toward her a little bit?
“Things happened quickly back in Fort Worth,” he began. His hat looked a little more battered at the brim, as if he’d been touching it over and over again since they’d been apart.
She nodded. “Is Asher okay?”
“I think so. He’s got Reese in a good place where she can get help. I guess she was trying to get off the paint thinner and went sort of crazy. Luckily, her mom showed up in time to take the kids away. But she couldn’t calm her down and had to call in the authorities.”
“Oh God.”
Buck nodded. “We all won in Fort Worth and we put half the winnings into an envelope to help Asher pay for the rehab facility.”
“That’s kind of you.” She expected nothing less from the Calhouns. Despite what others in the rodeo circuit said about them, the family stuck by people they cared about.
Tears flooded her eyes and her nose stung as she thought of being outside their ring—farther outside than before.
Buck’s gaze softened as he searched her eyes. “There’s more, Channing.”
Panic rose inside her. “Is it your mother? Or something Ennis has done to begin the oil drilling sooner?” Their bastard cousin was ruthless about taking that land. Sure, he’d given them a few months to vacate it, but he hadn’t wasted a minute calling in land surveyors or consultants about ways to maximize the prime Oklahoma ranch.
“No, no, nothing like that. It’s actually something good.”
She arched a brow, hope rising. He’d come back to beg for her back. He’d come to say he’d made a huge mistake in letting her go. Breathless, she waited.
“After you left with Asher, someone approached us about doing a TV reality show.”
She gaped. “A what?”
“Yeah, it’s hard to wrap your head around but things are moving fast. This network wants to feature the Calhouns in our own reality show called Rope ‘n Ride. Since we’re a rodeo family and all. Well I’m not in love with the idea of people prying into my private life, but how can I say no to the money? In a few months we’ll have enough to buy the ranch off Ennis.”
“I see.” Her throat was bone dry.
“Anyhow, I came here to ask you a favor.”
Her gaze shot to his. A lightning bolt of attraction sizzled between them, striking her square in the chest.
“What is it?” she whispered, though he might not hear her over her thumping heart.
He fidgeted. Toyed with his hat. Then his smoldering brown eyes rested on hers again. “The network knows about you—about our engagement.”
“Oh no.”
“And it seems they want you in on the deal.”
She jerked. “Me?”
“Yeah, they don’t know about…” He waved between them and his hand ended up pointing at the ring on the table several feet away.
She nodded, waiting for him to make his point.
“Look, there’s no good way for me to ask this, but they want me to be engaged on this show, Channing.”
She stared at him, uncomprehending.
He made a pained noise. “I’m asking you to come back and sign the contract and pretend to be my fiancée.”
“What?” She shot to her feet.
He stood too, towering over her, his big body a beacon to her lost and lonely one. She wanted to curl against his chest and feel his arms around her. To bury her nose against his throat and inhale the pink Himalayan salt and water lily scents clinging to his flesh.
He spread his hands. Wide palms, callused fingers. God, she wanted him to glide those hands all over her naked body.
“It’s a lot to ask and I wouldn’t do it if I wasn’t in a hard spot. See, I get a bonus if you sign on.”
Ice water splashed over her, leaving her a blackened, dead coal where seconds before she’d been on fire for Buck. “Are you seriously saying you’re using me to get more money, Buck?”
He had the grace to flush red and shift his feet. “It sounds awful when you say it like that, but you’re right. I’ll get enough to buy the mineral rights away from Ennis too if you sign on, Channing.”
The words fuck off were on the tip of her tongue, but she realized there was more to this.
“What do I get?” she asked.
He quoted her a sum that had her eyes rolling back in her head. She pressed a palm to her chest, certain she’d suffer a heart attack. “Are you serious?”
“Completely. Darlin’, is it so terrible to hang out with me and my family for a few months while they film us doing what we do? You give an interview here and there, show your awesome support for my family and…”
She sensed there was more. “Spill it, Calhoun.”
“Well I’ll need you to put that ring back on, Channing.” The hesitation in his voice told her there was yet more.
“And?” She arched a brow at him.
He scuffed his knuckles over his jaw, creating a rasping noise she felt all through her body. Her nipples hardened. “They’re expecting a weddin’ at the season finale.”
Her eyes did roll back in her head and the next thing she knew she was waking up in Buck’s arms.
* * * * *
Buck stared down at the woman cradled across his lap and wished to hell things were different
between them. That they didn’t have to pretend to be in love for the sake of good ratings or extra cash.
He felt like a grade-A ass for even asking her to travel this path with him. Hell, money had never meant much to him—to any of them. Until that will had revealed that their father’s life’s work was being passed to his first cousin, who’d passed away a year before. And that meant the whole ranch was in the hands of his cousin’s first son, Ennis.
The mere name in his mind felt like a hot cattle prod.
Turning his attention to Channing, he caressed her beautiful face. “Darlin’, wake up. C’mon, Channing.”
He’d never seen her faint before. Seen her pass out from pure exhaustion after being fucked silly, yes.
Slapping her cheek lightly, he said her name again. When her eyes popped open, the blue color stole his breath. He searched the depths. “Are you all right?”
“Y-yes,” she said shakily and tried to pull free of his hold. He wanted to keep her right there against him but didn’t press her.
She scooted off his lap and inched across the cheap carpet of her living room floor to put distance between them. His heart broke a little more.
“Buck, would you mind getting me a glass of water?”
“Of course. I don’t know why I didn’t think of it before. Hold on.” He got up and went into her kitchen. When he’d located a glass and filled it with ice and water, he returned to her side on the floor. She took the water, her fingers grazing his around the glass.
His cock gave a twitch of desire. Several days without her had worn him down. Two nights ago he’d awakened wanting her so bad, he thought he’d lose his mind.
After she’d taken several sips, she looked a little less pale.
“Are you okay?”
“I think. I’ve never fainted that I can remember. I haven’t been sleeping. Maybe that’s why.”
He nodded. “I know the feeling. Darlin’, I’m sorry to have dropped this bomb on you.”
“Don’t’ call me darlin’. I’m not your darlin’ anymore.”
