by Kris Bryant
“It’ll be a nice break for you. When do classes start back up?” Brook stared at me, gave me her full attention as I told her about my upcoming schedule. It was unnerving and made me tingle everywhere. Her eyes went from mine down to my lips, then back up to meet my stare. I had to remind myself I wasn’t on a date, but damn, I wanted to kiss her. Again. I wanted to feel her against me. I wanted to knock her walls down and pull her into my arms and melt the ice around her heart. I wanted to make her happy. And smile.
“How’s work? Are you going to be able to relax this week?” I asked. She gave me a small shrug, and I laughed. “I thought so. I’m sure with the whole family here, most of your conversations will be work-related.”
“Want to bet?”
“Oh. Oh, this could get good.” Flirting was harmless, right?
She laughed and took a sip of wine. “My mother has a no-work policy at meals. We can talk about anything else. Don’t you remember when we were at Anthony’s restaurant?”
I groaned and dropped my head into my hands. “I can’t believe I drank so much,” I whispered to her over Noah’s head.
“You were fine. I think we’re even now.”
“I promise to be on my best behavior.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” Brook dropped that bomb right when her parents sat down.
“Cassie, what do you think of the place?” Camila picked up the menu and perused it even though she probably knew most of what was on it. This was a foodie family, especially since Anthony had his own restaurant.
“This, all of this, is just gorgeous. For some reason, I thought the lodge would be like a hotel. Separate rooms, not separate huge cabins. Thank you again for inviting me.”
“We’re glad to have you.” She squeezed my hand. I was appreciative of how sincere Camila was, not like Gwen. I kept my poker face on when she and Frances arrived. She was going to be the one to treat me like an employee.
True to what Brook said, the conversation steered clear of all work-related topics. I kept quiet unless someone asked me a question. I was soaking up this large-family atmosphere. Erica sat on the other end of the table so I knew she wasn’t going to ask me any embarrassing questions. That would be for later. By the time dinner was over, the kids were practically asleep and had to be carried back to the cabin. It was after eight, and I was beat, too.
After all the kids were tucked in, the men went outside under the heat lamps and smoked cigars. I was invited to drink wine with Erica, Gwen, and Brook. Camila excused herself early, but the rest of us settled around the fireplace. Erica was the talkative one, bouncing from one subject to the next. It was obvious Brook and Erica were close. But I couldn’t put my finger on Gwen. She was standoffish but funny. She wanted attention but never wanted to be the topic of conversation without her consent. Brook was charming and funny, and I tried desperately not to stare at her. Erica caught me several times and smiled knowingly. After the fifth time, I feigned exhaustion and excused myself, telling them I’d be ready for the kids at ten.
“Sleep well,” Brook said.
“Sweet, sweet dreams.” Erica winked at me. I thought I saw Brook reach out and smack her arm when I slipped into my room, but I wasn’t sure.
* * *
Playing in the snow lasted a measly eight minutes, twenty if you counted how long it took us all to bundle up and locate missing gloves and get boots on the right feet. Noah wanted to snowboard, so I told him I’d take him out later when it was just us. The other two kids were just too small and didn’t want to be out. I didn’t blame them. The powder was light and great for skiing, but not great for building snowpeople. So I marched them to the main cabin for an hour-long arts-and-crafts class. We drank hot chocolate, ate hot dogs, and colored. It was fun, but I could tell they needed a nap. I leaned down to Noah. “When your cousins go down for a nap, we can play a game. I packed my Switch.” I held my fingers to my lips when I noticed he was about a second away from whooping and drawing too much attention to us. He nodded emphatically instead. “Let’s keep this between us. Less sharing time.”
“Hey, you want to go back to the cabin and nap?” Noah asked.
“Noah, that’s the worst thing to ask a kid,” I said. “How about we head back to the cabin and watch a movie?”
That suggestion obviously sounded more appealing. We gathered up our snowpeople made of construction paper and cotton balls and headed back to our cabin. I put the little ones on a sled and dragged them down the hill as Noah raced ahead, twirling and laughing at the snow that had started to fall again. Away from home and school, he really embraced his freedom. It was adorable to watch him.
“Peppa Pig,” Frances chanted while I unzipped her coat and pulled off her boots.
Griffin waited for me to do the same for him. Noah was already turning on the television and pulling up Netflix.
I had them line up on the couch by height, so Frances had the best seat. She was the smallest and needed the most advantage. I scrolled through the movies until they all decided on The Incredible Journey, about two dogs and a cat traveling cross-country to find their owners. I was hoping for Peppa Pig but was outvoted. I found blankets for the kids and settled on the floor in front of them, my back against the couch. Frances played with my hair until she fell asleep twenty minutes in, Griffin close behind her. When they were both out, I ruffled Noah’s hair to get his attention.
“Want to play a game, or do you want to keep watching the movie?”
“Can we finish the movie and then play?”
There was still forty minutes left of the movie. I nodded and quickly ran upstairs to get the Switch. I didn’t want it to be a big production of bringing a gaming system downstairs. I didn’t know if the kids were allowed to play, so the Switch was a nice small alternative.
“Come sit with me.” Noah patted the recliner beside him. I made sure Frances and Griffin were covered and moved over to Noah.
“Scoot, scoot.”
I waited until he gave me more than six inches to sit down. “Ready?” I asked him.
“For what?” he asked.
I hit the button on the side of the chair, and he giggled as it lowered and reclined us. He snuggled in the crook of my arm, and we sat like that until the movie was over and the gaming started. I didn’t hear Brook come in, which not only made me the worst babysitter ever, but probably the first to die in a home invasion.
“How long have they been asleep?”
Her voice startled me, but her hand firmly on my shoulder kept me from jumping up and dumping Noah in the process. Noah looked up from the Switch.
“Hi, Mom. Look. I’m playing Cassie’s game.”
I leaned back to look up at her. “I hope that’s okay.” She licked her lips and looked down at my mouth. I wondered if she always did that, or if I’d just started noticing since our kiss. “And those two have been asleep for a little over an hour.”
Brook nodded and took a step back, while the rest of the family breezed through the front door.
“The last thing I want to do is break my leg out on the slopes,” Gwen said.
Her eyes traveled from me to Brook and back down to me. Erica’s eyes did the same, but she had a giant smile on her face, while Gwen’s was pinched in a scowl.
“What have the children been up to?” Erica sat down and rubbed Griffin’s legs until he stirred awake.
“We gave up on playing in the snow, so we went up to the main cabin for arts and crafts, ate lunch, and came back here for a movie. You’re back early,” I said. I set us upright in the chair and untangled myself from Noah.
“We wanted enough time to get ready for dinner,” Gwen said. She woke up Frances by tickling her neck and whispering in her ear until she giggled. It was nice to see her interact and lose her bitchiness, even if only for a few seconds.
“Tomorrow we’re going tubing. I signed us up before lunch. I think that’ll be a big hit.”
Camila put a teakettle on the stove. “Cassie, will you
be joining us for dinner?”
I didn’t want to get too attached to this family, and I definitely didn’t want to overstay my welcome.
“No, thanks. I think I’ll head up to one of the bars at the main cabin and watch some hockey. I’ll just grab something there.” I didn’t care about the game, but I needed an excuse to do my own thing. I was starting to care about these people, and even though Brook insisted I was a guest, I was also her employee. Gwen was always so kind to point out that fact.
“Are you sure?” Brook asked.
“Yeah, I’m sure. But thank you.”
“I’m sure you need a break after six hours with these three,” Erica said.
“It was fine. They were good. Not fans of the snow, but to be fair, this kind of snow isn’t great for kids unless they like skiing. That’s why we’re tubing tomorrow.” I stopped myself from going into too much detail.
“We might see you later,” Erica said.
“Okay. Have a good night if I don’t.”
Brook asked Noah for the Switch back, and after only one round of “please let me keep playing,” he handed it to her without any fight. She gave it to me. “See you later.”
I smiled and went upstairs to change. Nanny clothes and a night out were completely different. I stayed upstairs until they left, knowing full well the kids would need to eat early. I styled my hair, squeezed into skinny jeans and a gray oversized sweater, and put on makeup. I even accessorized with a necklace, a scarf, and a few rings. When the crowd left, I slipped on my boots and headed out. It felt good to look less like a nanny and more like a twenty-four-year-old out to have fun with new people. I told myself I wanted to look good for new people, but I was really hoping I’d run into the Wellingtons, Brook specifically. She rarely saw me dressed up, and I rarely saw her dressed down.
When I walked into the bar, a cute bartender pointed for me to have a seat. “What can I get you?” She had long reddish-brown hair and dreamy eyes.
I wasn’t going to mind staring at her for a few hours this evening. I bet she got a lot of tips and a lot of phone numbers. “How about an IPA?”
She rattled off a few until I told her to surprise me because I couldn’t make a decision. “What brings you up to Mountain Ridge? Ski trip?”
“Sort of, but not for me. I’m a nanny.”
“We get a lot of nannies up here. Rich families need a break, too.”
I ordered a cheeseburger and fries and hung out and talked to her until the bar filled up and the other bartender showed up to help out.
I was on my second IPA when Brook walked into the bar. It was as if something told me to turn around at that exact moment. She walked straight over to me, turning several heads in the process.
“Mind some company?” she asked.
“Of course not.” I pointed to the empty chair beside me. “Who’s watching Noah?”
“Mom is. My mom, I mean.”
“Nice. So, you have the evening to do whatever?”
The bartender popped over to get Brook’s Jack and Coke, winked at me after she delivered it.
“Here’s to…” Brook paused and looked up as she thought about what she should toast. “Here’s to fun vacations away from the real world.”
We clinked glasses, and I finished what was left of my beer. I felt relaxed yet full of energy at the same time. Brook smiled at me like she had a secret.
“What?” I asked.
She shrugged. “Nothing.”
I put my hand on her knee. “No, seriously. What?” I didn’t move my hand. Neither did she.
“Want to get out of here? Get some fresh air? There’s a cute little park not too far away.”
I hated being cold. I wasn’t dressed for a walk on a snowy path in below-freezing temperatures. But was I going to say no?
“Sure. Let me just settle up.”
I threw some cash onto the bar and made sure to leave the bartender a big tip. I gave her a small wave when we left. She looked at Brook, then smiled knowingly at me. I smiled back. Apparently my crush on Brook was noticeable to everyone, but did Brook know?
Chapter Eighteen
“I don’t mind the cold much, as long as it’s not windy,” Brook said.
She was wearing warm boots, gloves, a nice hat, a scarf, and a coat. I was wearing half that and shivering. I clenched my jaw to keep my teeth from chattering.
“It’s not horrible,” I said.
She chuckled and linked her arm with mine. My body temperature spiked a few degrees at her nearness. “I’m sorry, but I wanted to talk to you and not around a ton of people.”
“Did I do something wrong with the kids today? Oh, crap. I forgot to take Noah snowboarding. I’ll squeeze some time in tomorrow.”
She walked off the path and into some trees. I held back. “It’s safe. Great view past all the trees. I’m not dragging you back here to kill you. I’m almost positive you could take me.”
I raised my eyebrow at her. I could definitely take her, in every sense of the phrase. She cleared her throat and motioned for me to follow her. I did. We dodged branches and deep snow until we reached a clearing. The stars were bright and seemed so close to us. The moon was a mere crescent in the night, affording us very little light.
“You’re right. This is gorgeous up here.”
Brook brushed the snow off one of the benches. “Have a seat.”
“Are you going to scold me?”
“Absolutely not. We need to talk about the other night.”
“Which one?” I sat down, tucking my hands in my pockets to stay warm.
“The night Noah fell in the pool.”
“I know I was wrong to argue with you, but I think—”
She stood in front of me and crossed her arms. “That’s not what I’m talking about.”
“Oh?” She brought up the one thing I’d been wanting to talk about for weeks, and I acted nonchalant like a teenager.
“The kiss.”
“The kiss,” I said. I blew out a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have done that. It’s all my fault.”
“Are you upset that we kissed?”
I looked up at her in surprise. “I’m not sure how I’m supposed to answer that.”
“I want you to answer with the truth.”
“I don’t think you do.” My brave words belied my nervousness, but I kept eye contact with her.
“Tell me.”
Well, fuck. Everything was on the line. My job, my future, my education. I guessed I could pick up a few shifts at the Pearl and maybe a few babysitting gigs. Living with Nana wasn’t the end of the world. I could downsize my wardrobe. I stood to lose everything, yet I never wanted to be so truthful in all my life.
“I’m not sorry at all. I’ve wanted to kiss you before I even knew you.”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
I stood. She didn’t move but looked at me and waited.
“I couldn’t keep my eyes off you the first day we met. You were at soccer practice off by yourself, and I noticed everything about you at once. Every part of me was aware of you. Your hair, your clothes, your suit, your confidence. I didn’t know who you were. You turned to me when Alex sent the text out to the parents to help me out of the bind, and you looked up at me with your stunning eyes and motioned me to follow you. I didn’t hesitate.” I was rambling, but I didn’t care. This confession was liberating and scary at the same time.
She didn’t move. She didn’t make a sound. I threw up my hands and sat back on the bench. She was going to fire me. I just gave her this massive confession, and she just stood there with her arms crossed.
“Well,” I said, “this has been very enlightening. I think I’ll go back to the bar and have another beer.”
“No.”
“No?”
Her shoulders dropped. “I’m sorry. I’m not very good at this. I’ve been guarded for a very long time.”
I was frustrated. She’d made me puke this confession, and suddenly she didn’t wan
t to talk? That wasn’t fair. “Not good at what? Talking? You talk for a living.”
“That’s business. It’s different.”
Another deep breath. “Okay, did you hate it? Was the kiss horrible?”
“It was a fantastic kiss, and I didn’t hate it at all. At all. But you’re an employee. And everything screams for me to shut up and let things go back to the way they were, but I can’t. I can’t stop thinking about you or that kiss.” She pursed her lips as if preventing herself from saying anything else.
I was too scared to move. This beautiful, smart, courageous woman I’d been dreaming of for months was standing in front of me telling me her thoughts were similar to mine? “So, what do we do now?”
She stared at me, her eyes big and vulnerable, her lips slightly parted. When her shoulders fell a second time, I thought for sure she was going to take a step back. Two steps. Three steps, until she turned around and left me alone on the bench. Instead, she leaned down until her face was only inches from mine.
“Anything we want.” Her lips brushed over mine, featherlike and so gently, they felt more like a breath against my mouth.
I pulled back to ensure this wasn’t the alcohol talking or a bad decision, but I saw only determination and want. She gained confidence when I put my hands on her waist and pulled her closer. She straddled my lap without hesitation. When I felt her press against me, I groaned and deepened the kiss. Her mouth was warm and commanding. Out of instinct or lust, I spread her legs farther apart so that the most physically intimate part of her was only a few thin layers of material away from mine. I pressed my hips up, and we both moaned.
“We probably shouldn’t do this here.” I broke the kiss and looked around. We were still very isolated, but civilization was only a few steps away. I’d forgotten about the cold. Fire, passion, and need spread through me, heating me from the inside.
She ran her fingertips over my cheek and across my lips, barely moving her finger away before her lips claimed mine in another intense kiss. I couldn’t get enough of her. I refused to let my negative thoughts have the stage. I picked her up and felt her legs wrap around my waist before I dropped us both into the snow. I had to feel all of her against me. I ground my hips against hers.
