“Seriously?”
“Seriously. I’m heading there in a few weeks to finish my schooling. Then I’ll become an earner and you know what comes next.”
“No. You can’t become an associate.”
“I don’t really have a choice. My path is laid out before me. I follow it or I die.”
“Come with us tonight. We can catch a plane together. You could live with me and leave this life.”
“I can’t do that. I would lead them right to you. They don’t trust me, remember? Their people are all over that place. I would be seen and you’d be compromised. It’s the Marconi freaking airport. Who do you think runs and owns it?” He grunted. “Argh! I can’t believe you are here.”
“I can’t believe you’re here either.” She had to say what she was thinking or she’d explode. “All I want to do is hold you in my arms, but you’re not making it easy.”
“Well,” he said, looking away. “You have everything you need. I’ll be going now.”
“No.”
“And when and if you find your family, don’t let them persuade you to stay. They will try, Kate. Family is everything to Italians.”
She was reminded of how Colby and Martino had said the same thing and wondered if it was one of the rules about being Italian that Martino would have taught her. Her cheeks flamed.
“They’ll want you. I hope they are good people. I hope your birth mother embraces you. And remember, not everything is as it appears. Italians can be cruel, selfish, not caring about anything but themselves, and so power hungry, even when it’s only the person receiving the power who knows of it.”
Kate couldn’t help but think that the same could be said about Americans. Then in a heated rush, he stepped away from the door and grabbed her, kissing her passionately on the lips. Deep tingles fired throughout her body and seemed to collect in her heart, creating a massive surge of adrenaline. He tried to pull away, but she held him in a hug for several seconds before releasing him. When he looked at her, his eyes glistened and he whispered. “No more secrets, Kate.”
She wanted to whisper the same words back, but she knew that sometimes secrets had to be kept. Before he left, he looked at her like he knew she was holding something back.
Kate’s insides roiled. Why had she let him go? She turned to Ellie, who was crying. “That was the most beautiful and sad thing I’ve ever seen. Katiebug, we’ve got to listen to him and get the heck out of here.”
“I can’t get out of here. I can’t. I’m too close.” She moved to Ellie.
Ellie stood. “We are getting out of here. You and me. You said you didn’t want to put me in danger.”
“I don’t. What happened to, I’ll go into danger for you?”
Sorrow filled Ellie’s eyes and she looked ashamed.
“It’s okay. I want you to leave. I want you to go back. Go back to Bologna without me. You’re not in danger except when you’re with me. So go. I seriously want you to go.”
“No. You’re going with me.” Ellie balled up her little fists.
“I can’t do that.” Kate stood firm. She knew there was no way Ellie would be able to force her to return.
“You are so stubborn, Kate Hamilton. Did you not hear what he said? Feel what he said? Even I felt that. I’ve never felt anything like that… Come on. Come with me.” She took a step toward Kate and took one of her hands.
“No.” Kate shook her head. “No. You go. I mean it. Go.” She squeezed Ellie’s hand and then let go of it.
“I’m calling Colby.” Ellie dug out her phone and punched in his number.
“Fine. But, you are going and I am staying. You should fly home, but if you are going to Bologna, to your brother, then lie low.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” She put her phone up to her ear. “You are coming with me.”
“No. I’m not. Accept it.”
“Colby!” Ellie almost screamed into the phone.
Kate turned to the computer, added an L to Carmela’s name and clicked on the button, sending her birth mother’s correctly spelled name into the search engine of the database. In the background she could hear Ellie talking to Colby.
One name popped up.
Birth date forty years previous and death date fifteen.
16
Kate could no longer hear Ellie’s voice. In fact, a loud humming seemed to fill her whole soul. As if on autopilot, she selected the name. A death certificate popped up on the screen. Carmela Bellini. Born in Venice, Italy. Died in New Jersey, United States of America. Several pictures of her and one of her grave were available. The location of the grave. Venice, Italy. Despite feeling like stone, Kate’s fingers still seemed to have enough flexibility to click on the link. Three pictures of her birth mother popped up. One as a baby, one as a teen, and one as an adult. It was definitely her. There was no question. And the headstone left no doubt. Her mother was dead, her body interred at the Venice cemetery. Kate drew in a quick breath.
She was barely aware of Ellie hugging her. She must have seen what Kate had discovered. Ellie was still talking on the phone. “No. Never mind. We’ll be back tonight and fly out tomorrow.”
“I’m so sorry, Kate. I’m so, so sorry.” Ellie squeezed Kate, but Kate was unaware. After a while Ellie clicked some buttons on the computer and Kate heard the printer spring to life. Ellie also took some pictures of the computer screen. Kate remained still, staring.
“I don’t mean to rush you, Kate, but the next train leaves in twenty minutes. It’s like someone is watching out for you. Like Carmela made sure you found this information so you could feel okay about leaving and be safe. It’s like perfect and terrible timing all at once. Now we can go back to Bologna together. There’s no one to see. I’m very, very sorry, but we have to go.”
“No.” Kate’s words came out as a whisper as she stared flatly at the screen.
“What? What did you say?” Ellie walked over and grabbed the papers from the printer.
“No. I’ve got to go to the grave. You go. Go to the train station. I know I’m putting myself in danger, but I have to go see the grave.”
“You’re being reckless right now because you’re hurting. I’m not going to let you stay. I know I’m the one who encouraged you to come here and find your birth mother, but Duran is right. We should leave.”
“I am going to the grave. I’m sorry Ellie. I’m here now, and we’ll never be back. It has to be now.” Every muscle in Kate’s body tensed, she pushed her shoulders back and stood. Nothing was going to get in the way of her seeing that grave.
“No. I’ll make sure we come back in a few years like Duran suggested. We’ll make sure it’s safe and we’ll come and visit the grave together. We’ll stay all day if you want. I swear. I’ll make it happen.” She gave Kate a pained stare and rubbed her upper arms, obviously needing some comfort herself.
“No. Go, Ellie. Go now.” Kate pushed on her, but gently.
“Kate, please.” Ellie was blubbering now. She was scared. Kate stood and hugged her tight.
“I’ll be okay. I need to do this, and I need to know you are safe while I do.”
Ellie huffed, “No!”
This was not a good time for Ellie to become stubborn. Kate would have to make her go. She didn’t want to hurt her, but Kate couldn’t have Ellie stay and be in danger longer than she needed.
Kate’s eyes pierced Ellie’s. “I don’t expect you to come with me. In fact, I don’t want you to come with me. This is your fault. You’re the one who pushed me to go looking for my mother and we found her. She’s dead. In the ground. All alone. I have to tell her I’m okay. I have to. But you go. You go back home to your perfect life. Your perfect living family. Go, Ellie. Go now!”
Ellie was crying. “Stop it Kate. You’re just upset.”
“No. I want you to go.” She pushed on Ellie until she was out the door. “Go!”
Ellie’s face had contorted into something like anger. She stomped her foot and said, “No.”
Kate closed her eyes and breathed deeply. She’d never get rid of Ellie like this. She needed a better plan. With a huff, she said, “Fine. Let’s go.”
“I know it’s hard, but you are too important to me, Kate. I would never leave you here alone, not with the Bellinis all over the place. Not with you being in so much danger. This is the right decision. We’ll come back, I promise.”
Kate dropped her head and said, “You have the information about the grave? Pictures?”
“Yes.” She waved the printed pages. “I took pictures of all the screens about Carmela and printed off what I could.”
“Could you send me the pictures?” Kate took the printed pages and put them in her backpack.
“Of course.”
“Now?”
“I will when we get to the train station. We are going to have to run.”
Kate nodded. “Let’s go then.” She still didn’t feel like she had control of her own body. It was like it was on autopilot.
Ellie gave a quick smile before leading the way out of the library. Once outside, Ellie said, “We should keep our heads down.”
Kate nodded and they jogged, heads down as much as possible, all the way to the terminal. They went straight for a machine to buy their tickets. With two minutes to spare and completely out of breath, they climbed onto the train.
Ellie took a seat next to the window and Kate put her hand on the back of her seat. “I’m not feeling so great. I’m headed to the Loo.”
“Want me to go with you?” People were filing onto the train, bustling past them and taking their seats.
“No. I don’t want to lose our seats. I’ll be right back. Send me those pics.”
“Okay.” Ellie pulled out a water bottle from her purse and grabbed her phone.
Kate took one long look at the back of Ellie’s head and then walked toward the back of the train, but instead of going all the way to the toilet, she took the steps that led her out of the train and onto the platform. Ellie would be so mad, but it was the only way. She wouldn’t even know Kate was missing until the train was already on its way back to Bologna.
Without looking back, Kate headed to library and walked to the Harry Potter study hall to find the librarian who had helped her earlier. “Could you tell me how I get to this cemetery?” She held out the paper with the name on it.
The librarian led her out of the room. “So, you found what you needed? I’m so glad.” Her smile was warm. “I can’t tell you how nice it was to help you today. Usually, I’m working with old, dusty texts and it’s nice to work on more current things. Walk down to the main drag there, where all the ships are docking and take the vaporetto, uh, water boat 4.1 or 4.2. It’s only a five minute ride to the island.”
“It’s on an island?”
“Yes. It used to be a prison forever ago and now there’s a church and the cemetery. It’s quite peaceful.”
“Thank you. Vaporetto 4.1 or 4.2.”
“Yes.”
Kate wished she could cry. Instead she went straight to the boat dock, stopping only to buy a huge vase with bright flowers from a street vendor. After paying the fare, she boarded the vaporetto for Isola di San Michele, an entire island for the dead. The boat was almost full, the water was calm, and the ride smooth. She could see everyone talking all around her, but couldn’t hear any one conversation. Her mind was fixed on her birth mother and the island that came toward her. Her mother was gone. Really gone. She wasn’t an FBI agent. They couldn’t find her because she was in a grave in Italy.
Because she was the last one on, Kate was the first to get off the boat. Although the church at the corner of the island was wonderfully cool and austere, Kate could not appreciate the sad beauty of it. And while the cemetery itself was wide and calm, a series of huge gardens studded with cypress trees and awful monuments, Kate’s heart rushed and thudded.
The whole area was cluttered with hundreds of thousands of tombs—some lavishly monumental, with domes and sculptures and wrought-iron gates, some stacked in high modern terraces, like filing systems. She grabbed a plot map, oriented herself and followed the paths that appeared to lead her to Carmela’s grave. As she walked she passed row after row of pure-white blocks of columbarium, colorfully decorated with flowers and pictures of the deceased. Rows of small white crosses filled the next area and then large tombstones. What struck her right off was the quiet that pervaded the island. An island to cradle the dead on the sea.
Finally, she came upon the grave. It was simple, a white cross that was aging in spots to a dull gray. The name, Carmela Bellini was unmistakable. She fell to her knees, setting the flowers near the headstone, and wailed, beating at the small patch of ground surrounding the stone. The tears that had built up in her exploded. Her mother was really dead. The proof was before her eyes. She would never see, touch, or smell her mother again. It was not fair. Not right.
Finally, when no more tears would come, she leaned up against the cross and talked to her mother, telling her all about her life. About that time in fifth grade when she ran into the glass wall, about her first boyfriend, and Duran. About her adoptive parents and siblings and how much she loved them. How lucky she felt to have such a great family. After a time, she noticed a second cross next to Carmela’s with Vincenzo’s name on it. It had his birth date, but no death date. She stood and noticed it was a family plot and there, on the other side of her birth mother’s grave was another. The cross had her name on it. Her Italian name: Constanzie Bellini. Kate whipped around and then knelt down, staring at the cross with her name. Her pre-adoption name. She’d supposedly died only days after her mother. Wait. She glanced back at her mother’s grave. She, Kate, wasn’t dead. She stood and said, “I am not dead,” to the quiet, peaceful island. An offering of truth.
What if Carmela really wasn’t dead either?
Just as she chastised herself for thinking it, her memories burst open.
Kate sat on a piano bench in a large hall. Carmela finished playing a beautiful piece and then smiled down at her daughter’s three-year-old frame. The room erupted with applause. Her birth mother was so beautiful. Flawless in a navy blue couture gown and hair lifted off her neck in a fancy supermodel style.
“It’s your turn now, honey,” she said as she moved slightly to the side.
Little Kate slid to the middle of the bench and put her hands to the keys. She played and played, and the audience clapped and clapped when she finished. Then she stood with her mother and the auditorium rocked with applause. They wanted an encore. Carmela nodded at her to begin playing again. The audience fell silent. Kate began to play, looking up at her birth mother and her birth mother looking down at her, her smile radiant. A boom sounded in the hall and Kate covered her ears as Carmela flopped forward, her head falling to the keys with a clang. Little Kate felt something warm on her cheek and turned toward the screaming crowds. She tapped her birth mother’s leg. “Mommy. Mommy!” Then she was rushed away in someone’s arms as people attended to her mom.
Seventeen-year-old Kate grabbed at her hair and screamed. The memory that had been locked deep inside her was now completely in the open.
She sat, staring at nothing, but aware of the sun moving across the sky. It was time to go. There was nothing more for her here. She knew without her father having to tell her now that the hit had been ordered by the Marconis and the Bellinis had allowed it. Her grandfather Salvatorio had allowed the Marconis to kill her mother, otherwise, the shot would never have happened. No wonder her father wouldn’t tell her what had happened. Somehow, she needed to make them pay.
She was only one person. An insignificant person at that. She had no skills. It was only wishful and desperate thinking that she could do anything to hurt them like they’d hurt her.
Kate stood and brushed off her pants and ran her fingers through her hair. As she did this, she noticed the area next to her family’s plot had six graves, what looked like the children, parents, and grandparents. Her gaze swept her family’s plot.
There seemed to be space for others. But who? Her grandparents? Were they still alive? Her birth mother was born here, maybe her parents, Kate’s grandparents, still lived here. As if the Heavens had opened an idea rang inside her head.
She could find her grandparents and tell them who she was. Show them she was still alive and not dead. That could be her revenge. It was a small act of defiance, but something nonetheless. She knew exactly how to find out if they were alive. She scampered back to the dock and got on the first vaporetto that showed up. The numbness had gone and a direct focus filled her. It was like her brain started working again and she could feel the hot sun on her skin. As she scanned the faces on the boat, they all looked familiar and seemed to be looking at her. Her leg muscles tightened, but she had nowhere to run. Instead, she pressed her elbows into her sides, trying to make herself as small as possible, trying to disappear. She stared at her feet, holding back a scream. She knew she was being paranoid, but she couldn’t seem to help it. The Bellinis would not take her. Not yet. She had to get to her grandparents before the Bellinis got to her.
The five minutes it took to get back to the main island seemed to take hours and her stomach felt rock hard by the time she stepped off the boat. She rushed away, glancing back to see if anyone was following her. Once she decided she wasn’t being followed, she stopped at the first shop she came to and bought a light scarf that she wrapped around her head, hiding her hair. Then she grabbed some large sunglasses and finally a jacket before heading to the library where she pulled up Family Search and located Carmela’s records again. There were no links to Carmela’s parents. A good sign. No pedigree chart linking them meant they could possibly be alive.
There was only one problem. She didn’t know their names.
She couldn’t find them without names. She didn’t even know Carmela’s maiden name. She clicked back to Carmela’s death record and was surprised to see that no parents’ names were listed. Kate sat staring at the computer for several moments until she remembered what the librarian had said about finding things in church documents. The marriage record was sure to have her grandparents’ names on it. It had to.
Kate Concealed Page 14
