“ ’Tis a most dark memory!” she simply stated as she continued to hurriedly walk away.
Chapter Fourteen
“A dark memory for me?” he questioned, undoubtedly curious.
“Aye, for you Killian. ’Tis the day your father’s castle was pillaged, your brother, Cian, was killed, along with so many others, and your father taken away. The day you were wounded so severely by the invading clansman’s sword and you were nearly killed yourself...the day your uncle found you hidden amongst the dead bodies.”
“I must see it!” he demanded.
“No.” She shook her head in adamant disagreement. “It would not be a wise consideration, Killian. I have viewed it before. ’Tis bloody and brutal and left me grievous and heartsick. It is nothing short of miraculous that you survived the harrowing ordeal at all!”
“And why did you feel compelled to watch it, then, Alainn?” His tone was soft, but his voice had a distinct coolness to it.
“I needed to understand all that had happened, all you’d experienced before I could attempt to heal you.”
“You watched it when you were a small child; even before you healed me?”
“Aye!”
“Well then, as a grown man, I suspect I’ll be able to bear it if you were able to withstand it when you were only a wee girl!”
Her eyes were sad and solemn, she remained doubtful of the wisdom of allowing him to witness it, but she knew he would not be dissuaded. She held tight to his hand while he viewed the gory spectacle, but she kept her back to the gruesome scene. When he’d obviously seen enough, he turned his head away and slowly lowered himself to the ground. His face had gone nearly void of color and his entire body shook with emotion at the painful memories that had been stirred by the vision.
She sat down upon his lap and gently wrapped her arms around his neck trying to ease his great pain. She tenderly ran her hand up and down his lengthy scar and finally took his handsome tanned face in her hands.
“You were unusually strong and valiant even then, Killian...at two and ten, forced to fight like a man when you were scarcely more than a boy.”
“Could I go back to that time, Alainn? Would you be capable of allowing me to journey back through time to that dismal day?”
“It is unlikely, sure I’d not be capable of taking you back to that fateful time,” she said in a voice barely more than a whisper.
“But if I might save my brother, or see what was actually done to my father.”
“If your brother lived through that day, he would surely not live long, for it must have been fated to be.”
“How can you of all people say that, Alainn? You saved Rory from the fall to certain death at the round tower several years ago, and he still lives today.”
“But sure I must have been meant to save him. I was allowed to view the portent vision of his impending misfortune because he was not actually meant to die. It was not what fate had in store for him.”
“So you think every step of our lives is already mapped out ahead of time, that we are simply pawns or puppets acting out a great drama...that no matter what we do in our lives, no matter what our choices, that the consequences are predesigned, everything is already aptly charted and accurately predetermined?”
“I don’t know what I truly believe, not entirely, Killian, for it oft seems contradictory and ever-changing. I do believe God has a specific plan for all of us!”
“What God, Alainn? My God, Lord God Almighty, our Christian God, or one of the Celtic gods that you now know exist?”
His tone was angry and challenging, and she knew he was becoming uncommonly argumentative. She reasoned that seeing the past had left him sorely tormented and she regretted allowing him to witness it and to relive it.
“I do believe in our God, Killian. ’Tis how I was raised; same as you.”
“But what of the other gods you speak of?”
“Perhaps they are not truly gods, just entities, or lesser deities. I am uncertain, Killian.” Her voice grew weary as she spoke. “Because I possess magical abilities clearly does not ensure I have definite answers to any of these great quandaries!”
“And when you interfere with the grand scheme of God or these other entities are you not riskin’ catastrophic consequences?”
“I do not know for certain, Killian. I don’t always use my mind when I employ my powers, but often my heart. If we went back to attempt to save your brother, perhaps a far worse fate would befall him!”
“Worse than a painfully brutal death at the age of three and ten?” His tone was sarcastic.
“Aye, he might have been horribly maimed. He may have been left alive, but never able to recover, unable to live as freely as he once did. He may have lost his legs or his eyes, had a mortal wound inflicted upon him that became purulent. He might have suffered in grievous pain for days, weeks, perhaps even months only to die at any rate. And what would that have done to your own heart, Killian, to watch on without possessing the ability to assist him or heal him?” she whispered, sadly knowing well enough what torture Killian would have endured if that had been Cian’s fate.
“And why then could we not simply watch what happened to my father; to learn what fate befell him, for not knowing, the damnable uncertainty has been slowly eating away at me for so many years.”
“Sure, I know it well, Killian!” She held him tight around his neck and though she was pleased he was opening up to her regarding this subject often too painful to be broached, she had few answers. “I have tried, Killian, so many, many times through the years, I have attempted to see him, to conjure an image of him, but it eludes me. Not so long ago, I spoke to Morag about it and she does not see your father or mine in the spirit world.”
“You’ve gone back there, Alainn, back to the spirit world, after what happened last time when you very nearly were unable to leave the spirit world?” His voice was raw with emotion.
“I wanted to be able to tell you I had news of your father one way or the other, and I sensed that your father and mine were together somehow. I thought the only place they could be together was in the spirit world.”
“But Mara says you might not be capable of returning from there and yet you still go when I have forbidden it.”
“It was for you I went. And Mara does not understand everything about my magic. ’Tis true she is a witch and possesses powers, but they are not of the same strain or magnitude of mine for I am of fairy and druid lineage.”
“Don’t go back there, Alainn. Not for me, not for anyone. I swear if you attempt it one more time, I’ll...” His voice was shaking now, so distinctly displeased was he, and Alainn sensed his entire body growing tense in his fury.
“This was a grave mistake, coming here, looking back or forward. ’Tis surely not meant for a human to witness.” She pondered more to herself than to her husband.
She moved from him and as she stood above the dark shadow on the ground before she held her arms out and then chanted lowly in words he could not discern.
“What is it you are doing now, Alainn?”
“I am creating a spell to permanently close this portal. No one shall ever be capable of entering or looking into it again for no good can come of looking upon the tragic events of that day. I should have done it long ago. If I’d known how to manage it as a child, I might have done it when I saw it back then.”
“Why not simply close them all, then?” Killian remarked in a less than pleased tone as he angrily gestured to the area surrounding them.
“A lot you know!” She griped in an equally displeased manner. “If I had a hundred years and there were a dozen of me, I might be capable of accomplishing sealing some of the portals.”
“There are that many?” he asked, this time more interested than displeased.
“More than even I could imagine. And some I cannot see or am not allowed to witness. If they pertain to me or involve me directly and I might attempt to alter the outcome, past or future, I am usually not given
access to viewing them.”
“Forgive me, Lainna!” he whispered as he gently caressed her cheek. “I was wrong to grow so angry and to direct my rage at you.”
“ ’Tis what a wife is for, no? To share all, both good and bad?” She smiled, but sadness remained within her eyes.
“No, a wife is to cherish and treasure, to love and to honor.”
“That would clearly not be a wife, but an angel or a goddess, not realistic, not included. I would rather bear the brunt of some of your displeasure and be included than to be shut out of what hurts or angers you. For surely together, united always, we can get through whatever life and fate has in store for us.”
“Surely!” He smiled and held her tightly to him.
“Shall we go back to our bed, then, Killian? I think we have seen enough of other times.”
“Aye!” He nodded in relieved agreement.
As they began walking back arm in arm, a large indentation in the ground seemed to appear before their eyes. Within the center, an oval opening appeared liken to a looking glass.
“Does that opening indicate you are to look within it?”
“So it would seem!” Alainn did not seem entirely overjoyed with the consideration.
As they approached it and peered inside, the noise and confusion nearly overpowered everything else about the vision. There were buildings that reached far into the sky and coaches that were swift and noisy, and some that disbelievingly flew through the skies. The air was filled with a pungent scent and the sky was enshrouded in a vaporous dark cloud.
The wide streets were filled with crowds of people all donned in unusual garments and all seemingly in a hurry. The unfamiliar sounds roared in their ears and Alainn glanced at a window in one of the enormous buildings. She noted a face in the window looking back at her and she felt a violent repulsion at the sight. She pulled away from the vision and fell back to the ground.
“What the hell was that place, Alainn, and what did you see that frightened you so?”
“I am almost certain the place was England, but I believe the time was centuries from now. I think I shall never again look into the future. I do not care to see what violations have been done to our world by then. I have seen quite enough!”
“Aye, well ’tis true it wasn’t pleasant. The din was enough to make a person’s ears protest, and the smell of it was acrid, but why did it frighten you so? Did you see something I was not aware of?”
“I don’t care to discuss it, Killian. If that is what the future holds nearly five centuries from now, then I am most pleased I live now, here in an era I adore, for even though it is not a time without peril and uncertainty, it is much preferred to that atrocity, and besides I am here with you in this time and that is all I shall ever desire.”
He noticed how her hands trembled and her voice quavered as she spoke. She’d obviously seen something more that disturbed her, but she wasn’t willing to discuss it and he would not push the issue.
They would go back to their bed, share another night of love together just the two of them, for soon they would need to leave this strange and beautiful place. They would need to face their world and their troubles, which included his uncle and their upcoming challenge, not to mention all that he’d seen at the graveyard with Danhoul and the spirit woman, Ainna. He had yet to speak of that to Alainn. He wasn’t certain he would ever be truly ready to relive that. Dwelling on those dismal thoughts left him as shaken as whatever it was that Alainn had seen in the far off future.
Chapter Fifteen
Alainn awoke to find Killian gone from their bed. She pulled back the silken fabrics that surrounded the bed and ensured they kept the bright morning sunlight from shining within. She spotted him on the other side of the water. He was wearing only his trews and his brawny chest glistened. He held a large tree branch in his hands and he was pulling it through the air as if it were a sword. She watched as his arms, taut and well-formed, strained with the weight of the branch and the speed with which he thrashed it through the air. He was practicing for his battle with his uncle, she was certain. He would be facing one opponent later this morning and another this afternoon. It may well be Riley that he faced this afternoon, for it was often the two O’Briens that battled it out for championship of the tournament.
As the standings stood the day before their wedding, Killian held first place and Riley second, they would battle the third and fourth opponents and the winners battle each other to be declared the champion. Killian had won the last three years, but this year because of the grand celebration the opponents consisted of even greater numbers.
Although she seldom watched when Killian took part in a challenge for she despised the knowledge he might be in imminent danger, Alainn delighted in viewing him when he was in mock battle. She thrilled in watching his chest and arms and back as he moved with a rare agility for the size of man he was. And his thighs and buttocks were most commendable as well. She smiled as she thought of what lie between those muscular thighs. It was still a wonder to her that not so very long ago she’d been virtuous, then only dreamed of being with Killian in that manner, but never actually believed it would be so. And now they were married, she carried his child, and they shared a physical relationship that brought a fire within her when even she thought of them being together.
She felt her cheeks grow warm as did every part of her at the thought of what it was like when they were joined in physical intimacy. She pulled herself from her lustful thoughts and continued to watch her husband in mock battle. She heard him cuss out loud when the branch splintered as he struck the ground with it. Alainn closed her eyes and aptly summoned his sword. When she opened them he held it in his hands.
“Ah, so you’re awake then?” He said when he saw his wife looking out from the canopied bed.
“Aye, I’ve only just wakened and seen you so busily training.”
“And what of the ruling of no weapons within the glade?” he called to her from across the spring.
“We will need to leave soon enough and I doubt you’d ever actually desire to cause harm to the creatures here in the glade. ’Tis important you hone your skills to the utmost.”
“Now you’re not makin’ me feel entirely confident with that bit of concern evident in your voice.”
“No, I am most confident in your abilities, but you have not held a sword in many days, and I know how regularly you prefer to train. And you could use a partner to spar with.”
“And did you have some wee fairy in mind?” He jested.
“There are others who might be enlisted who are capable of giving you a fair bout.”
Alainn remembered seeing the muscular form of Lugh, who was supposedly her guardian. He boasted often of being skilled in all forms of weaponry. Perhaps he would be willing to spar with her husband if she wished it to be so. As her guardian she hoped he would be willing to assist her. She’d barely allowed that thought to enter her head when he appeared before her. She remembered she wore no clothing so she quickly pulled the sheer curtains closed around the bed.
“Did you summon me, woman? Have you already tired of your human? Do you long to spend time with a male who could surely satisfy you more adequately?”
Alainn searched for her garments. They had been in rather a hurry to disrobe last night and she couldn’t recall where her gown or chemise had been removed. And Killian was correct, the fairies seemed to delight in magically stealing their garments and keeping them in a perpetual state of nakedness. Killian had taken to hiding his trews under his pillow so he would be ensured clothing in the morning. Alainn had not done so and she tried to summon some other garments, but she saw the curtains being pulled back and she hurriedly grabbed the quilts to cover herself.
“You needn’t hide your alluring loveliness from me, enchanting woman!”
“Aye, I certainly must!” She quickly assured him as she envisioned garments and they appeared on the bed beside her.
“What did you call me here for if you
don’t want me to mate with you?”
“I didn’t call you here, I only thought about you.”
“ ’Tis surely commonplace for females to lie within their beds and think of me, I would imagine,” he stated with a distinct conceit Alainn snorted at. The loud voice behind them caused both their heads to turn.
“What is the damn meaning of this? Why, by God’s bones, is there a mostly naked man gawkin’ openly at my entirely naked wife?” Killian blared.
“I am well covered, Killian. I assure you. He has viewed no part of me.”
“But I have imagined every part of you, enchanting woman and most often!” The being declared without thought of hiding such lewd confessions.
“You’ve a lot of nerve, man, admitting such adulterous thoughts and leerin’ at my wife so openly. Whoever or whatever you are, I suggest you draw your sword for I intend to teach you some manners in dealin’ with another man’s wife.”
The gigantic male seemed entirely unfazed by this open invitation to do battle, but he did turn to assess the man. “You are a fairly adequate specimen for a man, I must admit, but I have not entered this realm to do battle. It was your wife who called me here, so I would suggest taming her some if I were you.”
“You called him here, Alainn? What the hell is he talkin’ about, and how do you know this man?”
“I am not a man!” The male seemed completely insulted by the suggestion.
“Well, whatever you are, I assume you are male, that you possess the objects that make you a male?”
“I do, indeed, and I’ll reveal them to you should you require proof!”
He proceeded to begin to unfasten the cloth that covered his loins, but Killian and Alainn both discouraged it openly and Alainn looked away and felt her cheeks grow pink.
“I only just met him recently and I did not summon him, I merely thought of him.”
“And why were you lying in our bed unclothed and thinking of another man.”
“I am not a man!” He vehemently repeated.
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