All & Nothing

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All & Nothing Page 10

by Allie York

“What the hell kind of text is that, Jovie? You can’t send out a message saying some psycho is calling you without more details,” Mom screeched the words so loud I had to pull the phone back from my ear. Ewan chuckled.

  “I had to call the police so a quick text was all I had time for. I have it under control.” Biggest lie ever. I felt like everything was anywhere except in my control. Ewan squeezed me, knowing damn well I was a liar. It was like he could sense my fear and was determined to take care of it.

  “Don’t you dare go home. Whose number are you using, anyway?”

  “It’s Ewan’s, and I don’t think the man would let me leave if I wanted to.” He shook his head emphatically. “So, I’m fine, Mom.”

  “Come stay here. Bring Merlin, and you can sleep in our extra room.” She used her maternal voice, but there was no way I was going back home over some psycho. It was bad enough being there every weekend. I loved my family dearly, but sometimes they were too much. Before I could answer, Ewan took the phone and cleared his throat.

  “This is Ewan.” He rubbed his forehead. “It’s really no trouble for her to stay. The least I could do, really. I live right up from her shop and will make sure she gets back and forth safely.” Ewan paused. “Of course not. I’ll take her myself and pick her up. No, it’s my pleasure.” Pause again. “Right, no need to thank me. Have a nice night, Louise.” He dropped the phone on the couch in true mic drop fashion and donned a smug grin. “Now, I packed only the sexy nighties for you, so if you expected actual pajamas that’s too bad.” Something about his poorly-timed joke made me feel so much better. I was scared, and Ewan knew it. Mason knew where I worked, he found my number, and I was terrified. I forced a laugh and Ewan made me look at him. “You’re all right.”

  I believed him.

  I spent all day Wednesday cleaning Ewan’s house. I did laundry, washed dishes, and scrubbed the floors. The dogs got clean beds, and I ironed his shirts. Digging through the fridge and cabinets, I found everything to make vegetable lasagna. It took a couple of hours so I started around lunch knowing they would both be home right after four. Ewan’s bathroom was even clean. I was going mad. Like it wasn’t bad enough to fall in love with a guy I had just met, but I had holed myself up in his house with him and his sister. Then I was cleaning his house like I had never cleaned my own. Gods, I was going stir crazy. I tried to read, but there was no point. Every car going by made me jump as I sat on the porch swing. I went around to the back to sit in the hammock on the porch, but I couldn’t focus on anything. I finally pulled my laptop out and started typing. I wrote a crap story about a time traveler, but it dwindled fast, and I was writing drivel before long. I relented to my guilty pleasure of reading paranormal romance. There was no way for me to resist getting swept up in a good Dark Hunter book. No matter how embarrassing the habit, something about a vampire-esque troubled soul being saved from damnation by a mortal and having mind-blowing sex along the way got to me.

  By the time my alarm on my phone went off, I was half waythrough the book, and probably flushed from the scene I had just read. I ambled in to get the food from the oven and make lemonade. I squeezed the lemons, added water and sugar, tasting as I went until I heard the front door. Amelia bounced in.

  “Wow!” She looked over the kitchen. “Bored much?” I nodded at her slowly. I hated cooking but had made dinner and drinks from scratch. She shook her head. “Let’s do something tonight after dinner. Ewan can take us across town, or even out of town to do something.”

  “No, he worked all day, and we both have to work tomorrow.” Truth was, I was terrified to go anywhere. I was a fricking coward. Amelia shrugged and started sifting through stuff in her backpack. She slouched down at the table with a text book and rested her brow on the heels of her hands, reading. I set a glass of lemonade down in front of her. When Ewan came home, I was sitting across from his sister, also reading. What else was I supposed to do? I was too afraid to even walk my dog. He kissed Amelia on the head, and his eyes darted around the kitchen before addressing me.

  “Did you cook?” I nodded. “And clean?” I nodded again. Ewan pursed his kissable lips and caught his sister’s eyes. “Amelia’s right, after dinner, we’re going somewhere.” I shook my head adamantly, setting my jaw. Ewan crouched in front of me, taking my hand. “Jovie, we’re going to play mini-golf. They’re open late, it’s only four now, we can eat fast and go.” He said it gently, but I could tell my ass would be dragged to the car if I didn’t agree.

  “Fine, but you better eat the hell outta the lasagna.” He smirked and kissed my nose before going up to change. They helped me eat nearly the whole pan of lasagna and the lemonade was gone by the time we left, heading east. I drummed my fingers nervously on the armrest making Ewan grab them. Amelia bragged, daring us to bet on her “mad putt-putt skills”, sending us all into laughter. I hadn’t been to play mini golf in years, but the closer we got, the more my nerves settled and the more excited I was.

  Ewan paid for a round and handed out the multicolored balls. We let Amelia go first and keep score. She set her ball down, adjusting her grip and shifting to find the perfect angle. Ewan slipped his arm around my waist. “Not so bad, is it?” I cocked my head to see him and shook my head. Amelia tapped the ball in the hole, and I set my ball down, tapping it with the club to send it up over a hump and between two resting dragons toward the hole. After two more strokes, I finally hit the cup and groaned. Ewan got a hole in one.

  By hole nine, we were all mock mini-golf professionals, hitting one hole-in-one after another and cheering louder than any of the children trailing behind us. Amelia joined me at the end of hole ten to watch him. “There are like a million of these near our condo in Orange Beach, you should come with us this year.” I nodded, trying not to look shocked that they also had a flipping condo on the beach. “We usually go on spring break too, but Dad asked me to visit. Ewan was pissed, but I can’t hold grudges like he does. I was there when you two met.” She was a kinder person than I was, or, at least, better at forgiveness. Ewan and I were alike in that regard, apparently.

  He joined us after knocking his green ball in the cup. “Talking about me?”

  “Of course.” I elbowed him and he jerked me into a smothering kiss before we moved on. After Ewan kicked our butts, I treated them to ice cream, and we fought over what flavors should never be mixed and which complimented others the best.

  We drove back well after dark with the windows down and jackets on. Amelia went straight to bed, but Ewan and I squeezed into the hammock, facing each other and letting the canvas material cradle us. He had one arm under my head and his other hand on my waist while I traced his stubble with my thumb, cupping his face

  “Thanks for taking me.” The dogs scuffled nearby, tugging a rope toy between them and growling like wild beasts.

  “Thanks for dinner.” He kissed my forehead. “I’m glad you had fun. I was worried you would be stressed the whole time.” Ewan’s thumb made circles on my waist, and I moved in to rub my nose in his neck, inhaling his smell. The time outside had added a new dimension to it. His hand behind me slid over my hair, smoothing it against my back. “Ams said you two talked about your ex the other night. Did she get too nosey?”

  I shook my head. “No, she indirectly asked what happened, but wasn’t prying or anything.”

  “Ams seemed worried that he had been abusive.”

  I had to gather my thoughts at his statement. “I guess it depends on your definition. He never hit me, if it’s what you are asking, Davis was just very selfish. I just told her Davis wasn’t a nice guy, but was in the past. Is that all right?” I didn’t want to lie to the girl, but she didn’t need to know the things my ex said to me, either. Verbal abuse was the best way to describe it, but he had also been pretty cold in every aspect of our relationship, especially in bed. Ewan nodded, letting us slip back into silence, while the dogs tired each other out. I had no desire to move. I could feel his breath in my hair and his steady heart rate matching m
ine. He knew exactly what I needed, knew how to take my mind off of the drama surrounding me. I was undoubtedly in love with the man. I had fought so hard to make sure I never gave anyone else the ability to hurt me again, but Ewan and his sister had broken me.

  Mason launched himself across the counter, grabbing for me. I jumped back, but not fast enough. He caught my shirt and jerked me back into the counter. I yelped when my back collided with the edge. Mason wrapped the fabric around his hand and pinned me while he climbed over the gate. I screamed until my throat hurt and reached desperately for the phone, for the scissors, for anything, but I kept falling short. He had the scissors to my throat and tugged wildly at the button of my jeans, growling in my ear that I was his, I belonged to him. Mason shoved his hand roughly down the front of my pants, digging the scissors into my neck.

  Ewan shook my shoulder, and I jerked up in bed, panting, gasping for air. Curling my knees to my chest, I wrapped my arms around my legs and forced myself to breathe slowly. Ewan rubbed my back gently until my heart rate calmed and I was able to look at him. He pulled my head to his chest and kissed my hair. It was the same dream I had been having for days. At least Ewan woke me before Mason raped me and gutted me. Mason hadn’t showed up or called the shop, I change my number, and it had stayed out of his creepy hands. The whole week had gone by without incident, but the dream happened every night. I tensed every time the door opened or the phone rang. I refused to go out to eat within a five-mile radius of work and hadn’t been to The Savant in a week. Amelia’s party in a few hours meant I had an excuse to not leave Ewan’s house. I hated that I let Mason scare me into hiding. I hated that I let him alter my life in any way. It was the same as letting him win.

  “You know I don’t mind you being here, but you really have to stop hiding. It’s making you miserable,” Ewan whispered in my hair, pulling us back onto the bed. I felt like such a coward. I didn’t answer him. “It’s almost time to get up anyway, let’s go get coffee before work. It’s going to be nice and we can walk to The Lost Savant and then down to your shop. Getting out might help.”

  “Okay.” I knew I wasn’t actually being given a choice. It was the same tone he used when we went for mini-golf.

  “Tonight is the party then tomorrow your mother has insisted on us coming to dinner.” I snapped my head to glare at him. He had made plans with my mother without my consent. “Don’t give me that look. She called last night and invited us. I couldn’t very well turn it down.” Ewan had a point; Mom would have viewed it as rude and pouted for days. Might as well get it over with.

  “Just promise not to hate me once they are done with you.” I buried my face in his neck trying to hide from the day, from the whole damn week. His fingertips moved over the fading bruise on my upper arm from our shower tryst and he furrowed his brow. Ewan acted like he had beat me as opposed to it being an accident in the heat of fellatio and it was barely noticeable. “Stop obsessing over the bruise,” I grumbled at him.

  “I promise not to hate you, and I won’t stop until it’s gone. I feel awful for it.” He left my arm alone, but cupped my breast through the thin tank top.

  “But not awful enough to keep you from groping me when you think about it?” Ewan pulled his hand away from my chest in a huff, but quickly went back for more. “I thought we were going for coffee.”

  Ewan’s hand roamed under my shirt, sending my pulse into a frenzy. “We have time for both.” He shrugged innocently.

  I couldn’t blame him, it had been nearly a week, and after my lengthy hiatus, I was enjoying the activities as well. My lips captured his, and it took him no time to have us both undressed. Ewan slid up next to me, pulling my leg over his hips, and I swear my eyes rolled back in my head. Everything about being with him was sensual and tactile. Ewan cupped my face to kiss me and moved his hands over me fluidly. The man was everywhere at once. One touch from him and my body tingled with warmth. I dragged my nails softly down his back making him break out in goosebumps as he ran his fingers into my hair when I begged him for more. He avoided my arm like the plague, but kissed everything else, teasing everything within reach with his tongue causing both of us to climax well before either of us wanted to. We barely had time to work up an adequate sweat, but somehow it was still incredible. Quick or not, I needed it desperately. He kept me close with his lips resting on my forehead until my alarm went off and still seemed reluctant to let me move away from him.

  “I have a suggestion.” Ewan rifled through the drawer and set out a stack of clothes. I wasn’t ready to move, but answered him with a nod. “Would you be opposed to finding a more long-term contraceptive? I don’t mind, per se, but condoms are usually the last thing on my mind when we are in that position.” Ewan gave me a look and headed toward the bathroom.

  “I think I’m up for the task. I mean, unless you plan on following through with your threat of gentleman’s clubs, because classy or not, I prefer monogamy.” I could hear him laugh over the shower water and giggled. It was only partially a joke. I was sold, but wanted to make sure we were on the same page before trusting him that much. He had told me he wasn’t into casual relationships, and we spent more time together than apart, but my distrust nagged at me. I couldn’t help it. He had never done anything to make me not trust him. If anything, it was the opposite. Ewan did everything in his power to make me feel safe and comfortable. He had obviously posed the question to determine where we stood. I was dressed and running a brush through my hair when he reappeared and started getting dressed.

  “Was that your way of asking if I planned on being faithful?” Ewan caught my gaze in the mirror. His jaw was set and his brow creased. He actually looked pretty pissed.

  “No more than your birth control suggestion was your way of asking me the same question.” I reflected his challenging look, and Ewan broke our gaze, looking down at his bare feet. “That’s what I thought.” I gave him an eye roll that rivaled his sister’s and tossed my brush down. I was well-versed in mind games and could give him a serious run for his money. I didn’t want to fight with him, but he started it.

  “Not all of us are arseholes, Jovie,” he mumbled while I pulled my shoes on.

  “I wasn’t accusing you of being an asshole, but a few weeks doesn’t give anyone much time to build trust.” We had run recklessly into the relationship, diving in head first, and obviously, neither of us were swimming well if that was how we went about discussing any serious issues.

  “What the hell does our time line have to do with anything?” he growled at me, glaring. “How long were you married and that arsehole still fucked someone else? Just admit you don’t trust me.” Without another word, I snatched my phone from the dresser, and slung the door open. Screw him. Screw being afraid of Mason. And screw the fact that I had been staying with him for a week straight. How dare he accuse me of not trusting him? I had given him more in a matter of days than I had given anyone ever. I hooked Merlin to his leash, got my keys from their place on the hook, and grabbed the door handle just as he came thundering down to catch me. Ewan didn’t say a word. He used one hand to keep the door shut and the other to pull my head into his chest. When I let my hand fall from the door, he did the same, wrapping it around my waist. I let him offer his silent apology for a few moments before I relented to hugging him back.

  Chapter Fourteen

  EWAN

  “I stood there in the shower and let myself over think what you said,” I whispered into her hair. “It struck me that maybe you didn’t trust me, maybe you didn’t feel like I do, and instead of simply talking to you, I acted like an ass.” She started to answer, but I covered her mouth with my thumb. “I’m sorry. I told you from the beginning that I was not one for anything casual, but I didn’t think to ask what you expected.” I paused, rubbing my thumb from her bottom lip to her cheek. “I’m all in if you are. I am too old to play games and I am so tired of being alone, Jovie. We belong together, and I know I won’t find anything close again.” I put it out there and wa
ited. From the first night I asked her to stay, it was for me. I needed the connection, the contact. It had been so long since I felt anything at all, but Jovie awakened something in me. She made me feel things I had never felt for anyone. After being still against me, Jovie nodded, gripping me tighter, and sniffling.

  “Let’s go get coffee while there’s still time.” I let her pull away, and Jovie took the opportunity to press her lips to mine before grabbing my hand. The walk to get coffee was quiet but not awkwardly so. She hadn’t actually said, “Yes, Ewan I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” but seemed content with my confession. I hadn’t said what I wanted to say. I wanted to tell her I loved her, she was mine, and that she owned every bit of me, but I kept it to myself. I had already pissed her off once.

  Jovie sent Merlin and me to the patio while she got coffee and leaned against the counter to watch me pet her dog while she waited. The thought of us being foolish kept resurfacing. But then how was it foolish when we enjoyed each other? Both of us were consenting adults and we were on the same page, so what was the problem? More than that, I loved her.

  I leaned back and closed my eyes, still stroking Merlin’s head, until I heard her voice. I cracked my eyelid to see her talking to a husky man with buzzed hair and an orangeish tan. I grit my teeth at the sight. Jovie could talk to who she wanted, but the man was making her uncomfortable. Jovie shifted her weight from foot to foot, holding our coffees and biting her lower lip. The man finally stopped gawking at her long enough to look past to me and pushed past her to go through the glass door to where I waited on the patio. She followed him, barely making it through the door he hadn’t bothered to hold open. I was handed a cup and we both watched the guy fawn all over her dog. I tried to catch her eyes, but she just stood, staring at him.

  When the man finally stood, looking her over again. “You look hot, Jovie. How are you?” He pulled her into a stiff hug, letting his hands wander a little too much, and anger slammed into me. It took considerable effort to not smash my fist into his jaw.

 

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