by Sindee Lynn
“A little light reading.”
“What do you want B.J.?”
She saw the deep breath her sister took and knew she was in for it. This was what she’d been avoiding. She’d rather it had been Louis at the door.
“I want you to start acting like the older sister and not the immature child you have been for the last two weeks.”
“Huh?” was all Sasha could utter.
Okay not exactly the start she had predicted but she could only assume more was coming. And it was guaranteed she wouldn't like it.
“If this Dylan person is someone you want to be with then it’s time you got off your ass and did something about it. Good men like that don’t come around often and there’s no guarantee he’s going to wait for you forever.”
“Huh?”
This was not the conversation she expected to get from her sister. Not only had she expected a lecture about propriety and how she could have been caught in such a compromising position she’d also expected to hear something about Dylan’s being white. Sasha paused. Funny how she hadn’t thought of that in a long time. Somewhere along the way the fact that Dylan was white stopped being an issue for her. He’d just become the man she was dating.
“I swear Sasha. I hope you had more conversation for Dylan than this. You sound like a broken record,” B.J. snapped.
“We didn’t do a lot of talking,” she said under her breath.
At B.J.’s widened gaze, a small smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. It was the first real smile she’d given in a long time. She could never stop smiling while she was seeing Dylan. Just the thought of him could bring on the goofiest look.
“I gathered as much by the picture,” B.J. retorted.
Her mouth opened in shock. Her sister had made a joke. Not something she was known for.
“Good one,” Sasha said.
B.J. bowed her head.
“I’ve been hanging around Cat too long. Seems she’s rubbing off on me in more ways than one.”
That was very cryptic Sasha thought eyeing her sister. She was about to ask her when B.J. continued.
“Now back to you. Do you or do you not want this man?”
She opened her mouth to reply then closed it. Was this a trick question? Maybe there was a deeper meaning that she was missing. Regardless the answer was the same. Even after the worse possible thing happening it was still the same.
“Well yes but …”
“Do you believe this man wants you in return?” B.J. continued, interrupting her when she would have said more.
That was definitely a no brainer. She thought back on the many messages Dylan had left her over the last two weeks. All asking her to take some time to think about what they had before she made her final decision. Messages that all ended in his telling her how much he missed her. Sasha hadn’t been able to delete any of them.
“Yes, but there’s no way this would ever ….”
“He’s not Melvin, Sasha,” B.J. said interrupting her.
A shiver ran down her spine at the mention of her ex-fiancé.
“Melvin couldn't handle the pressure of being with a woman like the one you were becoming. Confident and capable of trusting your own judgment. So he had to tear you down to make himself look and feel good. He tried to undermine your work and your accomplishments. And he said hurtful things about you. He didn’t deserve you. And you didn’t deserve what he put you through. And if there was any indication Dylan Matthews was another Melvin I’d be right there beside you ready to kick his ass. But he’s not. Dylan didn’t do this to you Sasha. He didn’t take the picture that night in the parking garage. And he wasn’t the one who made the decision to run it on the front page.”
Sasha barely felt the pressure of B.J.’s hand on her arm. She was so deep in her own misery.
“Don’t make him pay for the actions of someone else. Don’t you think it’s time you stopped letting Melvin have control over your life?”
B.J. got up and left, leaving Sasha sitting in the kitchen stewing in her own misery. She didn’t know how long she sat like that before she got up and blindly walked over to the sofa and plopped down.
Could B.J. be right? Was that what she was doing? Letting Melvin run her life. All this time she’d thought she was the one in control. Always thinking on her actions before she made them and always within her rules. Rules that had been created after her breakup with Melvin. Old pain filled her chest as she allowed thoughts she’d believed long since buried to come back to the front.
Thinking back on it now, Sasha couldn’t believe she’d thought of spending the rest of her life with Melvin. He’d seemed like the perfect man for her. It was funny how that perfect man had tried to ruin her.
She and Melvin had begun dating shortly after she’d first started working at Freeman Investments, her previous employer. For her it had been love at first sight. He had been a senior financial analyst with five years of experience under his belt and the kind of man every girl wanted to take home to Mom and Dad. With a dark chocolate complexion, Melvin stood at six feet three inches with muscles to go along with the height. He had often times surprised people with his knowledge of the financial industry.
In the beginning, things were great. Sasha had acquired the book knowledge from school but Melvin had helped her put all that learning into more practical use. Explaining the customer wasn’t interested in fancy terms, they wanted to know the bottom line and that was how much money you were going to make them.
She had been a quick study. She’d always known she had a natural way with numbers but she’d learned she had a way with people as well. Her smile could put them at ease when handing over their life savings to her. She’d learned how to dress and style her hair to appear older, thus putting some of her older clients at ease with entrusting her with their money. It wasn’t long before Melvin began recommending her to assist on some of the larger accounts he handled. That’s when she had really begun to be noticed.
Two years had passed and their personal relationship grew stronger. Sasha had thought Melvin was the one. He understood what she did and knew the pressures of the job better than anyone. He could relate to having to stay at the office late. He was there right along side her most nights. But along with their personal relationship, Sasha’s career grew as well. She had gained confidence in her own abilities and started overseeing her own projects. At first she had thought Melvin was happy for her. After all how could he not be? He had been her mentor in a way. But nonetheless, things began to get tense between them. And despite feeling the change in their relationship, Sasha hadn’t wanted to believe the cause of it at the time. However, when she had gotten the lead for an account he had assumed he would get, she could no longer ignore the obvious.
Rumors began to circulate she had not gotten the assignment on her own merit. Since she was one of only three females in her department and the only black one, it was suggested she’d been handed the assignment simply because she was a black female. Sasha hadn’t wanted to believe Melvin had been the source of those hurtful things. After all he’d claimed to love her, but when she’d overheard him for herself. There was no way she could keep the blinders on any longer.
She had ended their relationship and Melvin had eventually left the company. A short time later she had been slapped in the face again with her own stupidity when she had been told he had tried to discredit the work she’d done on the last account they had worked on together. He’d claimed he’d done the brunt of the work himself when in fact the opposite had been true.
That was when her first rule had been created. Sasha figured she had made enough mistakes in her relationship with Melvin that as long as she didn’t do any of them again she should be okay.
She absently wiped at the tears that had fallen. B.J. was right. She’d let her dealings with Melvin dictate every relationship after that. She had unknowingly given him more control over her after they’d broken up than when they’d been together. And she had never had a pro
blem with that until Dylan. He’d contradicted every one of her rules right from the start. No matter how she tried to stay within her comfort zone, he just kept enticing her to step outside of it. And only when she let go had she discovered so much about herself. A giggle escaped Sasha. Who knew she was a closet freak? There was passion inside of her she’d never have known was there if not for Dylan, or perhaps it was only because of him that it was there. She’d had sex before but never had it been the uncontrollable thing it was with him. Melvin had even referred to her as an old maid on occasion after she’d failed to try something a little more adventurous. Another giggle escaped. If he only knew all the places she and Dylan had sex he would just die.
Sasha got up from her couch. She sat at the island, with pad and pen she wrote out her rules. Ripping the piece of paper out of her pad she headed upstairs to her office. Memories assailed her immediately and for the first time in two weeks she didn’t fight them off. She wanted them to come.
She turned on her shredder. The quiet humming calmed her. Taking a deep breath she dropped the piece of paper which contained all her rules and watched it disintegrate into a thousand little pieces.
“Good bye Melvin,” she said before hurrying to her bedroom for the phone. She didn’t have much time.
Chapter 21
The nerves running through Sasha as she stepped from the limo’s cool interior couldn't be described. She was terrified. What if things didn’t go the way she wanted? What if he showed up with someone else? That thought almost had her getting back into the limo. But she took a deep calming breath and gave a weak smile to the man assisting her out of the vehicle. Her hand moved nervously to her hair and down the sides of her dress. You can do this, she told herself as she looked up at the steps in front of her.
“May I?”
The question was accompanied by an elegantly attired elbow pushed in her direction. Sasha smiled at the gentleman and nodded her consent. With each step she took closer to the door the butterflies in her stomach turned into birds in full flight. What if her name hadn’t made it on the guest list after all? Oh god what if Dylan had asked that she be taken off? She glanced up to see they were at the door. She thanked the gentleman beside her and took another deep breath. There was no turning back now.
“Good evening Madame. Your name?”
“Sasha Jordan,” she managed to croak pass the lump in her throat.
It seemed like hours she waited as he flipped through the many lists. With each page flipped dread formed in the pit of her stomach the size of a boulder.
“Ah there you are Ms. Jordan,” he said finally lifting his head to smile at her.
Sasha tried not to allow the relief she felt in the answering smile she gave him.
“Enjoy your evening,” he said bowing slightly as he motioned her inside.
One hurdle crossed and another to go, she thought as she looked around in awe. There were no words to describe the elegance that surrounded her. Her gaze kept darting from one thing to the next not able to quite believe she was inside the mayor’s mansion. Perhaps on another occasion she would have been able to fully enjoy the architecture surrounding her or the art on the walls, but she needed to find Dylan.
***
Sasha gently massaged her aching toes. She’d been searching for Dylan for what felt like hours and as of yet had not managed to even catch sight of him. She had been headed to some of the smaller rooms when her feet had begged for mercy. She’d sat down at the first empty table. Hopefully she could gain feeling in her toes before she was forced to get up. Maybe she should have just called him instead of trying to be impulsive. It would have certainly been easier on her poor feet.
“Well has anyone found out who she is yet? I mean is she just some commoner hoping to catch the limelight or what?”
Her ears perked up at the sound of the female voice coming from behind her.
“I don’t know but did you see the way she was clinging to him. It was almost indecent.” Another female voice commented.
“I couldn't agree more but does anyone know who she is?” asked the first voice again.
A chair scrapped and a heavy sigh come from behind her.
“My feet are killing me. Who are we gossiping about ladies,” asked the newcomer.
“Dylan Matthews of course who else. Have you seen him this evening? He hasn’t left the bar all night,” the second voice said a hint of sadness in her voice.
Sasha gasped.
“No but I saw the pictures. If only my Harry would look at me like that,” the newcomer replied a sigh in her voice.
“Oh pooh. Who cares about that? It made her look like the tramp she most certainly is for being caught in a situation like that. You would never find my Tiffany in that position,” the second voice said with disdain.
“Does anyone know where she came from? I’ve never seen her with him out anywhere before but then Dylan has been keeping to himself lately,” asked the first lady.
“I think the paper says she works for Presco.” The newcomer said.
“So that’s it. Well, I should have known. It’s just an office fling. Means nothing. I’m sure he’ll be back to himself in no time. So I’ll just let Tiffany know,” the second voice said with a laugh.
“Gladys really give the poor boy some recovery time before you set Tiffany on him,” the newcomer said with reproach. “Besides he may actually have had feelings for this one. It was all over them both in the pictures.”
“Oh pooh,” the lady Sasha now new to be Gladys replied. She could almost see her waving off the comments.
“It does all make sense now though. I imagine it would make it easier to have an afternoon tryst. Your office or mine,” the first lady said laughing.
Sasha had heard enough. She shoved her sore feet back into her shoes and got up from the table embarrassment heating her face. This is what she’d been afraid of. People thought he’d hired her just so he could sleep with her. The nerve of those old bittys. Sasha headed towards the door. She was done. Then she stopped abruptly. Wait. She was doing it again. The same thing she had been doing for the last two weeks. Running. And she was tired of it. Those people didn’t know her and in the long run they didn’t matter. Dylan had been trying to get her to understand that as long as they knew what the truth was and her work spoke for itself then who cared what everyone else thought. She turned and headed towards the bar where Dylan was reported to be developing a relationship with the bartender. She only hoped that was the only relationship he’d developed since she’d seen him last.
Rounding the corner after asking directions to the bar, she breathed a sigh of relief. He was indeed at the bar. Dylan was leaning against the bar swirling a glass in one hand while another sat in front of him. He appeared to be speaking with the man beside him. Sasha walked a little closer, butterflies the size of eagles swirled in her stomach. She took a deep breath and prayed she wouldn't be sick. She approached them from behind where they stood. When she heard their conversation she paused behind a large plant.
“So who did you bring tonight?” the man asked.
“No one,” Dylan replied simply before downing the liquid from his glass. He put it down and reached for the other one sitting in front of him.
“I would have thought it would be the cute little number from the newspaper a few weeks ago?” the man asked.
“Nope,” Dylan said taking a gulp of his fresh drink.
“Hmm and to think I actually thought she might be someone special,” the guy commented.
Dylan finished off his drink before turning back to the man.
“Yeah what makes you say that Sean old buddy?”
Sasha heard the slur of Dylan’s words. She wondered how much he’d had to drink.
“It was in the way you were looking at her in one of the pictures. And I guess the way you were touching her.”
“Can I get another please,” Dylan asked of the bartender. “Yeah well things change.”
“I kind of figur
ed. So you wanna tell me what happened?”
The expression on Dylan’s face changed. His shoulders slumped as he leaned against the bar. When he lifted his eyes to look at his friend, her heart began to ache for all that she’d put him through. She could see the sadness reflected within their blue depths. There were dark shadows beneath them that spoke of sleepless nights.
“Things just didn’t work out. I guess she decided I wasn’t what she wanted after all.”
Sean laughed.
“And since when did you let something like that stop you. You’ve never quit on something you wanted.”
Dylan grunted.
“Yeah well I’m fighting a loosing battle. What can you do when everything about you goes against the Rules of Love,” he said sarcasm dripping from his words.
Sasha straightened. How did he know about that? She tried to rack her brain to recall if she’d told him but came up blank.
“Have you tried begging?” Sean asked a serious expression on his face.
“Give me some credit,” Dylan said finishing of another drink. “Of course I did. But it didn’t help.”
The man put his hand on Dylan’s shoulder and squeezed.
“Just give her some time. She’ll come around and see what a great guy you are.”
The sadness in the look Dylan gave his friend put Sasha into action.
