Finding You

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Finding You Page 4

by Elizabeth Holland


  “Sorry, Luke, what did you say? I was a million miles away.” Plastering a smile on her face, Laura turned to face him. She couldn’t help but notice the differences in his and Sean’s appearance. Sean’s eyes were blue, whilst Luke’s were green. Their hair was different shades, and Luke’s appearance was much more chiselled. Luke looked like he had just walked off of a photoshoot with Vogue, whereas Sean had been boy-next-door handsome. They were opposites, and Laura couldn’t help but wonder whether that was a good thing. Perhaps she needed something different to help her move on.

  “I said we’re here.” He gestured out of the window to a modern-looking block of flats. A blush rose on Laura’s cheeks. He was being kind and generous, allowing her to stay with him, meanwhile she was considering using him to move on from her possibly dead boyfriend. The morphine was confusing Laura’s thoughts, and she no longer knew what she wanted.

  “Oh, thank you.” She climbed out of the taxi, with some help.

  “Luke, I promise I’ll pay you back for all this when I can access my accounts.” Laura glanced down at her shoes as she stood to the side and watched Luke pay the taxi driver before he helped her into the building and led her to the lift. She had a sick feeling in her stomach that she was taking advantage of his kindness.

  “Please, Claire, don’t worry about it.” Before Laura could respond, the lift doors pinged open onto the fifth floor and Luke stepped out, putting his hand in front of the doors so that Laura could safely hobble out on her crutches. She would have to tell him the truth about her name soon. After everything he was doing for her, he deserved to know the real her.

  Laura followed Luke over to flat number forty. Even the front door looked expensive. As she followed him into the flat, she couldn’t help but compare it with her old home. Instead of the plush beige carpets that her and Sean had chosen, Luke’s flat had expensive looking wood flooring running throughout, effortlessly merging into each room. It was open plan, with both the living room, dining room and kitchen all in one. An estate agent would most likely refer to it as the perfect area to entertain in. Laura wondered whether Luke did much entertaining.

  “The guest bedroom is just through here." Laura was eager to explore the whole flat, however she dutifully followed Luke into the bedroom. It was just like being in a posh hotel. The floor was the same dark wood as the rest of the flat, meanwhile the walls were various shades of white. She suspected they would describe the guest bedroom as ‘brilliant white’, otherwise known as ‘bland’. The furniture looked expensive, and yet the room had no personality to it. It was similar to staying in a chain hotel, where guests expected the same room to be replicated wherever they were in the world.

  “There’s an ensuite just through that door, and the door to the left is the wardrobe. I’ll let you get settled and order some dinner, are you happy with Indian?” Laura nodded in agreement, feeling a little overwhelmed at the life she had walked into. Who knew that getting hit by a bus could bring such luxury into your life? Not to mention a good looking and charming doctor.

  Laura unpacked her few possessions and changed into an old pair of shorts that were at the bottom of her backpack. It was hot in the flat and other than the tattered jogging bottoms she had worn home from the hospital; she had nothing else that would go over her cast. Laura briefly glanced in the mirror, but her reflection repulsed her. She didn’t recognise the gaunt face staring back at her with strands of lank blonde hair stuck to her face. Turning back into the bedroom, Laura looked towards the French doors which led out onto a balcony. There was something unnerving about it, she was exposed. Laura had to take a deep breath and remind herself that there was no way those men could know where she was. Nobody had followed them. Perhaps she wouldn’t tell Luke her real name, the less he knew about her the better. To him, she would always be Claire. That also meant that she couldn’t get too close to him - there was no chance of them having a future together.

  Chapter Seven

  The next few days were strange. Laura was reluctant to leave the flat in case anyone recognised her. Whilst she was in this concrete tower she was safe, nobody could find her. She’d left no clues at the hospital and so for now she could relax and enjoy feeling somewhat safe. Luke had been into work every day, leaving Laura to enjoy the quietness of his flat. She had almost forgotten what silence was. Having lived on the streets of London and in hostels for a year, she had grown accustomed to there always being noise coming from someone or somewhere.

  Laura’s first night in the flat had been peaceful. She thought she might struggle to sleep through fear of someone finding her, however as soon as her head hit the pillow she was asleep. There was something about Luke’s company that made her feel safe. The following day had been difficult, left alone, with no distractions. She had only her own thoughts to keep her company, and that scared Laura. She hadn’t wanted to be a burden to Luke and so she had spent the day curled up on the sofa flicking through the television channels. The old her would have hated spending a day like this, however there was nothing else she could do.

  On that first day, before Luke came home, Laura took in her surroundings properly. She tiptoed around the flat, which was difficult considering her leg was in plaster, still afraid that someone might find her. The walls of his flat were surprisingly bare, not one picture hung on them. Laura reasoned with herself that perhaps it was because he was a single man who went out to work each day. He probably came home so tired every night that he didn’t even realise that his walls were a blank canvas. No pictures stood on surfaces, only a few little nicknacks and a vase full of flowers. The flat was clean, tidy and somewhat clinical, but perhaps that was just a reflection of Luke. For now, it was a safe haven for Laura to recuperate in.

  The first two days, Laura barely saw Luke. He had already left for work by the time she woke and both days he had left her a note saying he was having to work late. On her second day, waking up in Luke’s flat, she woke up to find a note from him. He had left her one of his old mobiles. She picked it up. The phone was an old one of Luke’s and could only send texts and make phone calls. It reminded Laura of a burner phone. She turned it over in her hands and considered how strange it was that something that had once been an integral part of her daily life now felt unusual in her grasp. The screen flashed, and Laura unlocked it to see that she already had one new message; it was from Luke.

  Sorry I’ve not been around much. I thought I’d dig out this phone so at least we can text on my breaks. Let me know if you want anything from the shops on my way home. Luke xx

  Laura couldn’t help the butterflies in her stomach as she kept glancing at the kisses Luke had put at the end of the message. She tried to reason with herself that he was just being kind. It didn’t work. Instead, Laura used her crutches to walk over to the sofa and sat down to text him back. She put three kisses at the end of her message. Laura spent most of the day staring at the phone, waiting for Luke to message her.

  On Laura’s third day at the flat, she woke to the sound of Luke preparing his breakfast in the kitchen and so she quickly dragged herself out of bed, wanting to briefly see him before he went out to work.

  “Sorry, did I wake you?” asked Luke as she made her way into the kitchen, still trying to adjust to walking with the heavy cast on her leg.

  "I was already awake.” Laura lied, she didn’t want him to feel awkward in his own home.

  “I’m only in for a few hours this morning, so I thought we could spend the afternoon together?” There was a nervous edge to Luke’s tone as he looked down at his bowl of cereal.

  "That sounds perfect. Movies and a takeaway?” It was what Laura had been doing for the last two days, but to have Luke with her would make it so much more enjoyable.

  “You can choose the film.” Luke gave her a quick smile before going to grab his coat and leaving for the morning. Laura couldn’t help the bubble of excitement that was rising within her. An entire afternoon in Luke’s company!

  Usually, after brea
kfast, Laura would collapse in front of the television and watch the first trashy program that she stumbled upon. Today, however, was different. She had an afternoon with Luke to get ready for. She decided to brave a shower. Laura knew she would have to keep her cast dry, and so she went to the cupboard under the sink, hoping that was where Luke kept his bin bags. To her delight she swung open the cupboard and right in front of her was a roll of bin bags. However, what struck Laura as odd was that there was nothing else in there. Didn’t everyone keep their cleaning products in the cupboard under the sink? She shrugged to herself. Perhaps he had a cleaner who brought their own products with them. Once showered, Laura collapsed onto the bed, she was exhausted from her morning of activities, usually by now she’d be on her third episode of Escape to the Country.

  Laura didn’t have a hairbrush with her, and so she had a quick look through the drawers in her room. Maybe there was a hairdryer in there. She was wrong. Each drawer was completely empty. Luke really was a fan of minimalist living. Accepting her hair’s frizzy, unbrushed fate, Laura made herself a coffee and sat down on the sofa, ready to find their first film of the evening. Thankfully, Luke had Netflix since he didn’t own a single DVD. A sense of guilt washed over Laura for wasting these days and not looking for more information on Sean. However, she was enjoying having a break from the constant heartache.

  Chapter Eight

  Laura had only just sat down when Luke came bursting through the door, full of smiles and relief at his shift being over for the day. Laura was in awe of how hard he had been working all week.

  “I bought movie snacks!” he announced, placing a bag filled with food on the sofa next to her.

  “Could you get anymore perfect?” Laura kept her tone light, but she meant every word. Luke had picked up popcorn, an assortment of chocolate, various bottles of drinks, and the cherry on the top were the ingredients that he had picked up to make nachos.

  “Are you ready for our movie marathon?” Luke asked, as he walked back into the room, now wearing jogging bottoms and an old faded t-shirt.

  “I am! I thought we’d start off with something funny and so I’ve opted for The Inbetweeners Movie.” Choosing a film had been difficult. Usually, Laura would opt for a RomCom, but something about curling up on the sofa with Luke and watching a cheesy romance seemed wrong. Perhaps because she had done it so many times with Sean that to do it with another man would be wrong.

  "Perfect choice!”

  They both settled into the film, relaxed in each other’s company, as they laughed in-between devouring the mountain of food that Luke had brought home with him.

  “Tell me about yourself.” The film had ended, and Laura was staring at Luke’s profile as he scrolled through Netflix, trying to find their next film.

  “What do you want to know?” he asked her, shooting her one of his killer smiles. A blush crossed Laura’s cheeks as his gaze settled on her. She couldn’t tear her eyes from his.

  The movie boomed in the background, making Laura jump. “Why don’t you tell me about your family and your childhood?” Laura asked, trying to dispel the attraction between them.

  “Okay, but it’s not very exciting. As you’ve probably guessed, I had a very middle-class upbringing. I was as-good-as an only child, my older brother moved out before I was even old enough to remember. My dad is business minded, I suppose you could call him an entrepreneur. He was quite different to my mum. Mum was a doctor and wanted to help everyone, whereas dad is ruthless. I want to make them both proud, but it’s difficult. During her spare time, my mother helped at the local homeless shelter and I would sometimes go along with her. She inspired me to want to help people and improve their lives.” Luke’s face remained humble throughout as his eyes shone with unshed tears. Laura had noticed that he spoke about his mother in the past tense.

  “I’m sorry, Luke.” She reached across and took his hand in hers, wanting to convey her emotions in the small gesture. His hand was soft and her hand fit perfectly in his.

  "It’s okay. She was a wonderful woman and she’s the reason I’m a doctor. Anyway, enough about me. What about you, Claire? What skeletons do you have hidden in your closet?” Luke was smiling and his tone was light, but Laura couldn’t help but freeze at his choice of words. Did he know she was keeping secrets from him?

  Laura panicked, if she was going to tell him the truth about who she was then now would be the time to do it. Did she want to? Yes, he was gorgeous and had gone out of his way to help her, but could she trust him? She didn’t know if she could trust anyone. In that split second she knew she couldn’t tell anyone the truth, at least not until she was truly safe.

  "There’s not much to it. I was an only child. My parents brought me up in the centre of Manchester and I had a pet dog to keep me company.” Laura saw the rejection flash across Luke’s face. He knew she was holding back information. He was right, everything she had told him was a lie. She wasn’t an only child. At the age of ten, her life had been turned on its head when her parents arrived home from the hospital with her baby brother in tow. She also had not lived in the centre of Manchester, and she had grown up with a cat, not a dog. Laura had lied, and she had also opted to keep up the facade of being called Claire. She didn’t know whether the lies were to protect herself or to protect Luke, after all, the less he knew the better for him.

  They spent the rest of the afternoon and evening watching films and eating nachos. Despite their earlier attempts at getting to know each other better, the conversation remained light and Luke told Laura about some of the most awkward patients he had looked after.

  “Have you taken many of us awkward patients home?" Laura joked, but she saw a look of seriousness cross Luke’s face.

  “No, you’re my first. I couldn’t just leave a pretty girl like you to fend for herself on the streets with a broken ankle and a group of thugs after her.” His eyes locked with hers and Laura’s body fizzed with anticipation. His hand reached out to hold hers and a smile spread across her face at his touch. This time, she couldn’t tear her eyes away from his. She felt compelled towards him. Slowly, she leaned into him and he met her halfway. It was nothing like kissing Sean. There was no familiarity about Luke’s lips as he kissed her and she kissed him back. Laura had to admit he was a good kisser, possibly better than Sean, but it was wrong. She would trade a million kisses with Luke for just one with Sean. Laura pulled back and blinked a few times as she tried to find the words to soften the rejection.

  “Sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” Luke apologised, he looked embarrassed at how he had behaved.

  “No, it’s not your fault, Luke. I wanted to kiss you, but I just don’t think I’m ready. I’ve been through a lot.” Laura didn’t want to talk to Luke about Sean and so she stood up, picked up her crutches and left him sitting alone, staring at a blank screen.

  Once in bed, with the television switched on for background noise, Laura allowed the pain to knock down her walls. What had she been thinking kissing Luke? She wasn’t even sure she trusted him. It upset her to think that Sean was no longer the last person she had kissed. She had betrayed him, and for what? A stupid fling that could never go anywhere. She would apologise tomorrow and tell him it couldn’t happen again. Kissing Luke had taught her that Sean was her true soulmate and without him a piece of her was missing. Laura longed to pick up her phone and call Sean. They had been together for so long that she always went to him with her problems. Although, this was one problem he couldn’t help her with. Her heart was being torn in two. One side wanted to find Sean, whilst the other wanted to seize life and live again.

  Chapter Nine

  The following morning was awkward. It was Luke’s day off, however he had received a call asking him to go in. Laura wondered whether he had offered his help after their encounter last night.

  “I should be home early tonight so I thought perhaps we could get a takeaway and try to forget about how awkward last night ended?” His voice was soft, but his brow knitted togeth
er and his eyes held a shimmer of regret. Laura had to shake her head to stop herself from falling under his spell.

  “That sounds good, but why don’t I cook for you instead?” She may as well make some use of her years of training to become a chef.

  “Perfect. I’ll see you around five.” With a last smile and a wave of his hand, Laura watched as Luke left the flat. She couldn’t help but feel a little upset at his absence. It had been so long since she had someone to speak to. However, perhaps a day apart would be good for them. It might help to dispel the atmosphere.

  Feeling brave, Laura got dressed for the day and to pop out to a supermarket to buy the ingredients for dinner. She would have to go back out into the world at some point. She couldn’t keep putting it off, and she wouldn’t be able to stay indefinitely with Luke. With this in mind, Laura threw on her tatty jogging bottoms and grabbed the emergency cash Luke had left her. One day she hoped she would be able to access her own money to pay him back, but until then she would have to be in his debt.

  As the fresh air hit Laura, her hands shook, and her breathing quickened. She was exposed now and did not know who knew of her whereabouts. She wondered whether anyone at the hospital had alerted the police to what had happened. If they had, then the police would be looking for her. Laura knew she would have to be careful. She had thrown on one of Luke’s hoodies before leaving. She pulled the hood over her head, trying to cover her features. Laura didn’t know the area and so she followed the crowd, hoping it would lead her to some shops. She was jumpy and couldn’t help but feel as though someone was following her, however she tried to reassure herself that it was completely normal to feel that way after all she had been through.

 

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