On a religious note I also think my story is interesting and inspirational. Some people have told me I should become a pastor! Maybe that’s because I get so passionate when talking about God, maybe it’s because my face is quite well known now, and maybe it’s both. Who knows what’s in store for me? I do believe that there is a God that heard everybody’s prayers. It’s mind-blowing how everybody stopped and said a quick prayer for me. When I came out of hospital I was told about the hundreds of thousands of people who wrote #PrayforMuamba on their Twitter accounts and it all helped – I have absolutely no doubts about that.
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If I ever want a reminder of how close I came to not being here I unfortunately don’t have to think too hard to come up with examples. Just before I left hospital, Shauna pecked me on the head one morning and mentioned that she had to tell me something. She had been keeping some news back for a couple of days because she didn’t know how to say it. “What is it?” I asked nervously.
“A player in Italy has died,” she said. “A guy called Piermario Morosini who plays for Livorno has had a cardiac arrest. He didn’t make it.”
What do you say to that?
It really, really upset me. I had to take a moment for myself and think about that. I feel so sorry for his family and friends. A fortnight or so after Shauna mentioned that, Alexander Dale Oen, one of Norway’s best swimmers, suffered a cardiac arrest in the shower after training and also died.
Two young men, just as fit as me, just as happy as me, just as ready to take on the world as me.
They died and I didn’t. What do you say to that?
People went: “That could’ve been you” and I shook my head and said “that WAS me.”
Maybe that helps you understand why every single day is now a huge blessing. May they both Rest In Peace.
I suppose in one sense it is inevitable that my life would change and become more public after what happened but I’m sure I will remain the same ordinary dude. A few offers have come in to go on different television shows but I still don’t really think of myself as a celebrity even if I’m very flattered by all the attention. I’m just an ordinary dude who’s experienced something out of the ordinary. When I hear about all these new offers, these new angles I just laugh – I’m just me, the same old Fabrice.
I like my everyday life, thank you very much. I don’t want that to be disrupted. I take Joshua to school, have some breakfast, read, sort paperwork out, do whatever needs doing and keep my head down. Why do I need that to change?
The physical effects of my collapse obviously mean that playing football is a no-no but I still love the game as much as I always did. Family first, football second. It was always that way anyhow but even more so now.
I’ve been told I can start light exercise such as swimming and some gym work, which is a relief, and it will be great to try and build up a sweat again. Apart from the odd memory problem here and there I’m in perfect condition and I look pretty much the same as I did during my playing career. My heart has been fine since my collapse, apart from a tiny correction it made when I was in France in the summer. It’s comforting to know the ICD is fine and works and it was nothing to really worry about. I feel great at the moment thanks to my family, my friends, the medical staff who looked after me and God.
Add those together and nothing is going to hold me back.
So do I have any regrets? I suppose that’s the biggest question of the lot.
And the answer is no.
It happened. I couldn’t control it, this is what miracles are made of. Did you know that no doctor can put an exact finger on exactly what went wrong and then what went right? You cannot explain that. It’s just part of the bigger picture and you have to move forward. I’m 100 per cent sure that if God wanted me to die I would’ve done so on that pitch. Why wouldn’t I have done? Think about it. Who comes back from that? But my survival has convinced me there is a reason for it all – even if I’m still trying to work that reason out.
Only the future can tell me. Only the future will make that clear. At the moment, the fact I’ve got any future at all is enough to make me smile.
I’ve done enough dying to last a lifetime.
Table of Contents
Title
Dedication
Credits
Acknowledgements
Introduction
Pictures A
1.Judgement Day
2.Living A Dream
3.Leaving
4.Culture Shock
5.Making It Count
6.Game Of Survival
7.On The Move
8.The Call
9.Love And Hope
10.Buying Time
11.On The Brink
12.No-Man's Land
13.Second Life
14.Starting Over
15.Lost And Found
16.One Last Shot
17.Blessed
18.All Together Now
19.No Limits
Pictures B
Fabrice Muamba: I'm Still Standing Page 20