by Anna King
Ruby, numb with fatigue, limped past him back into the study, wondering as she did so if she would ever see her home or her children again. Sitting down in the chair she had only recently vacated, she felt her mouth turn dry with fright. What could he possibly want now? Perhaps to discuss her now redundant situation in the house? Surely he wasn’t going to evict them from the lodge already? He couldn’t! She needed time to recover her strength, to rest her aching body and weary mind, before setting about the business of finding another home. Her face showing no trace of her anguish, she prayed wildly, ‘Please, God, don’t let him evict us! Not just yet. We’ve nowhere to go, and I don’t think I can take much more today.’
When Sir Charles was seated, he said, ‘First of all, may I thank you for all the support and kindness you showed to my late stepmother. I’ve learned from the staff and Mr Cox of the close relationship that existed between you, and for that reason alone I would have thought she would have left you better provided for. However, the answer may be in this letter that was delivered by a bank messenger shortly after we returned from the funeral, with strict instructions that it should be given to you in private after the reading of the will. I sincerely hope that the contents will be to your advantage.’
Ruby gazed at the long white envelope lying on the desk, her heart thudding. Raising her head, she looked at Sir Charles, and felt her breath catch in her throat at the kindliness on his face. He looked nothing like the forbidding gentleman who had entered the house so bombastically just a short week ago. She began to relax as she waited for him to continue.
‘I don’t know what you have heard about my relationship with my stepmother, but it was common knowledge that we didn’t get on. It was partly my fault. I didn’t like the idea of my father marrying again, and being young and idealistic, I didn’t hesitate to let them know my feelings. Mabel in turn told me exactly what she thought of me. “A snotty-nosed spoiled brat” is the term she used, if my memory serves me correctly. And do you know, Mrs O’Brien? She was right!’ His brown eyes clouded over as the past came flooding back, then, with a wry smile, he added, ‘Although we never really got to know each other, on the few occasions when I was in her company, she left a strong impression upon me. She was a remarkable woman, and will be sadly missed. As you are already aware, I intend to close the house for an indefinite period. My home is in Essex, and my wife is very happy where she is, so I can’t see us taking up residence here. At the same time, I can’t quite bring myself to sell the house.’ He spread his arms as though asking her advice, then, pushing the envelope towards her, he said kindly, ‘If you like, I shall leave you alone while you read it, or perhaps you would prefer to wait until you are at home?’
Ruby thought of her mother and Lily waiting at the lodge, ready to fuss over her the moment she walked through the door; and the children, who would be clamouring for her attention. And what if Michael, unable to bear the suspense any longer, decided to return home early? For all she knew, he might well be waiting for her this very minute. With a trembling hand she took hold of the envelope, saying shakily, ‘Thank you, but I’d prefer to read it now.’ He rose to leave, but she said quickly, ‘Please, there is no need for you to leave, but – but I appreciate the gesture.’
Taking a paperknife from him, she carefully slit open the seal. Inside the envelope were three neatly written pages.
My dearest Ruby,
How bewildered you must be feeling at this moment. I know it’s not the small amount I left to you that will be causing you so much anguish, but the belief that I saw you as merely another member of my staff. My, dear, dear friend, did you really imagine I could think of you thus? You, who have brought such love and happiness to my last years? No words will ever express how much you meant to me. I don’t think I need to tell you how much I loved you, dearest Ruby, and I would like to think that the feeling was reciprocated.
I’ve always prided myself on not being a sentimental woman, so I shall get to the point of this letter and pray that when you have finished reading it you will understand why I have acted as I did, and harbour no ill-feeling against me.
I have instructed my bank to pay to you unconditionally the sum of £3,000. It is a great deal of money, which is why I didn’t want the rest of the staff to know of your true inheritance; hence the nominal sum that was stated at the reading of the will. Also, I wanted you to have the choice as to whether or not you confided to Michael the amount of money you received. You see, my dear, I still am not satisfied in my mind that he is the right man for you. Only you know that for sure, but being the loyal person you are, you would never complain if your marriage hadn’t turned out as you had hoped. It was with this thought in mind that I made arrangements for you to keep your legacy secret if you wish to do so.
If I am wrong in my feelings regarding Michael, you have the option to share your good fortune with him. Please don’t be angry with me for my feelings of distrust against your husband. I may not have shown it, but I had a certain fondness for your Irishman. He reminded me so much of my Patrick, which is probably the reason for my misgivings. I have only ever had your wellbeing at heart, and that of the children.
The decision is yours alone, Ruby. Nobody apart from Mr Bunting, the manager of my bank, knows the contents of this letter. I urge you to think long and hard before you decide what to do. Used wisely, the money will enable you to buy a house of your own, for I fear that my stepson will wish to sell this house since he has no use for it. Also it will enable you and the children to live comfortably for many years without the worry of having to seek employment.
I am very tired, Ruby: tired and dispirited. My world seems empty without the Queen. It’s difficult to explain, but she was a part of my life, the rock upon which England stood, and now that she is gone I am aware of a void that no one else can fill, not even you, dear child.
I have lived longer than I expected and I am not afraid of dying. Don’t grieve too long for me, Ruby, I am at peace now. You have your life to live and two wonderful children to love and care for.
Be happy, my dearest, dearest Ruby. Maybe we shall meet again if there is a hereafter.
Goodbye child,
Your dear friend,
Mabel
The last words swam in front of her eyes, and her hand was still shaking when she carefully folded the pages and returned them to the envelope.
‘Are you all right, Mrs O’Brien?’ Sir Charles enquired, coming over to her side.
‘Yes… thank you,’ she answered tearfully, her body churning with emotion at the knowledge of the love that had gone into the writing of the letter.
She reflected on the wisdom of her friend’s action, for since her death only a week ago, Michael had barely been able to contain his excitement at the prospect of the money he felt certain Ruby would inherit. And while she had mourned for her dead friend, he had been making plans for the future, a future in which he would never again have to call any man ‘sir’. If she were to tell him about the money, he would immediately begin to make plans. She knew his greatest desire was to own a pub, and, if given the chance, he would use her legacy to realise his dream. Dear Lord, the idea was ludicrous! He would drink most of the profits! ‘Stop it! Stop thinking like this; he’s your husband!’ she told herself sternly, ‘and you love him still.’ But loving him didn’t blind her to the fact that he would never be happy until he felt he was his own master. He needed to feel superior to the ordinary man in the street, much in the same way that her father had felt, but for Michael there would be no wealthy grandfather to help him to achieve his ambitions. Even were she to hand over the entire amount to him, it would be nowhere near enough for the position in life he was aiming for.
Sighing deeply, she made to get up from her chair. Seeing her movement, Sir Charles put his hand out to steady her, and was met by an icy stare. ‘I can manage to rise from a chair by myself, Sir Charles,’ she said coolly, then, seeing his startled look, she felt immediately contrite. ‘I’m sorry,’ s
he murmured, ‘but I cannot bear to be treated as a cripple.’
Sir Charles raised his eyebrows in surprise. ‘Believe me, Mrs O’Brien, that was not my intent. I would offer my assistance to any lady who was in such obvious distress as you seem to be at the moment.’
Ruby bowed her head in shame, then, lifting her chin proudly, she placed her hand firmly on his arm and allowed him to help her from the chair. When they were standing by the now open door, she withdrew her hand and, looking up at him, said quietly, ‘You haven’t asked about the contents of the letter. You must be curious?’
Taking hold of her hand, Sir Charles assured her, ‘The contents of the letter are your business, and your business alone, Mrs O’Brien. However, if at any time you need my help in any way, please don’t hesitate to approach me.’ So saying, he stood aside to let her pass, and Ruby, with a slight bow of her head, left the room.
Chapter Twenty-two
‘I don’t want Auntie Mabel to go to heaven with the angels, Mum, I want her to come back home!’
Ruby looked at her seven-year-old son, full of compassion as his blue eyes filled with tears, his soft bottom lip beginning to tremble as he struggled to come to terms with the bewildering fact that the kind old lady whom he’d loved was never, ever coming back to him. Pulling him closer, she looked across to where Daisy sat, her four-year-old granddaughter Florrie fast asleep in her arms. Since her arrival back at the lodge over an hour since, Ruby had been patiently trying to console her son, but with no success. Now, her nerves frayed beyond endurance, she spoke to him harshly. ‘Look, Danny, we’ve been over all this. I miss her too, more than you’ll ever know. There’s nothing more I can do, and I’m tired, son, so very, very tired. Be a good boy and let Aunt Lily take you up to bed. We’ll talk more in the morning after we’ve all had a good night’s sleep.’
‘But, Mum…’
‘I said that’s enough. Now go to bed.’
Hearing the note of hysteria creeping into Ruby’s voice, Lily quickly crossed the room and took Danny gently by the arm. ‘Come along, Danny. Your mummy’s tired, I’ll take you up and read you a story.’
Without a word Danny allowed himself to be led away, his shoulders shaking, his head bowed, his young mind still trying to comprehend the enormity of the situation. Daisy also rose, the child in her arms still sleeping fitfully, and followed Lily from the room.
Left alone, Ruby stared into the blazing fire, her teeth chewing nervously on her bottom lip. Although it was already nine o’clock, still there was no sign of Michael. Her body tensed at the thought of the confrontation ahead. He was probably celebrating at this very moment in anticipation of his coming good fortune, but she had no intention of telling him about the letter. Nor anybody else for that matter, not even her mother. She’d decided that the wisest course would be to put the money away for the children; then, if any thing happened to her or Michael, at least they would be well provided for. As soon as she was able, she intended to go to the bank and instruct the manager accordingly. The sound of footsteps on the stairs jerked her back to the present.
‘Florrie’s still asleep, dear, and Danny is quieter now,’ Daisy said softly as she settled herself in the chair opposite Ruby. ‘Is there anything else you’d like me or Lily to do for you before we return home?’ Shaking her head tiredly, Ruby answered, ‘No thanks, Mum, but thank you for coming with me today. It was a great comfort.’
Daisy nodded, then, looking to where Lily stood by the door, said, ‘Lily, would you fetch our coats? Mr Chadwick will be wondering where we are.’ When Lily had left the room, Daisy leaned forward and said anxiously, ‘Are you sure you’ll be all right, dear? I mean, Lily could stay with you tonight if you wish, just in case…’
Her words were cut off sharply as the door burst open and Michael staggered into the lodge. ‘Good evening, ladies. I’m sorry I’m late, but… I was un— unavoidably delayed,’ he slurred drunkenly, while clutching at the edge of the table for support.
Ruby didn’t even acknowledge his presence. After one brief look of disgust, she turned her gaze back to the roaring fire.
Daisy stood up slowly, her eyes taking in the spectacle of her son-in-law. Apart from the slight paunch around his middle, Michael hadn’t changed much in eight years. He was still handsome in spite of his drinking habits, but at this moment all Daisy beheld was a red-faced, drunken slob who was threatening to wake her grandchildren with his raucous voice. She grabbed hold of his collar, and shook him violently. ‘Be quiet! Do you hear me?’ she demanded, her face filled with anger. ‘You should be ashamed of yourself, coming home in this state, and on a day like today! Have you no respect for the dead?’
Michael looked down with amazement at his normally placid mother-in-law, then, pulling himself away from her grasp, he snarled, ‘Thish is my house… madam. And I’ll thank you to mind your own business. Now I’d like… to talk to me wife – in private.’
As he went to walk away, Daisy once more grabbed hold of his coat, and aided now by a startled Lily, proceeded to push him past the bemused Ruby and into the bedroom. With one last concerted shove they threw him onto the bed, and Daisy, breathing heavily, said angrily, ‘You can stay there and sleep it off, and if you attempt to bother my daughter tonight, I— I’ll take the poker to you!’
Michael lay across the bed, his mouth agape at the unexpected attack. He was about to pull himself up but seeing the wild look in Daisy’s eyes, thought better of it, and with a contemptuous shrug, he flopped over on his side.
Shutting the door firmly, Daisy whispered to Lily, ‘I think you’d better stay here tonight, just in case.’
Before Lily could answer, the muffled sound of laughter brought both their heads round to where Ruby was bending forward, her arms holding her stomach as she tried to stifle her merriment at the scene she’d just witnessed. Both women stood agape, then, when Daisy saw the tug at the corners of Lily’s mouth, she too began to laugh.
‘Oh dear,’ Ruby gasped, ‘I didn’t think I’d ever laugh again, but the sight of you and Lily bundling Michael past me into the bedroom, well! It’s the funniest thing I’ve seen in ages. And did you see the look on his face? He didn’t know what had hit him!’
When at last they had composed themselves, Daisy picked up her hat and coat from the back of the settee where Lily had thrown them and, still smiling, said, ‘Are you sure you don’t want Lily to say tonight, dear?’
‘I don’t mind, Ruby, and I could help with the children in the morning,’ Lily said, anxious to be of assistance.
‘No, it’s kind of you both, but I’ll manage. You’d better get off home, else Dad will be wondering what’s happened to you. Mr Masters will get you a cab.’
Tying the ribbons of her bonnet under her chin, Daisy said in a hesitant voice, ‘You could always come home with us, dear. Your father would be overjoyed to see you, and the children.’
Ruby looked away quickly. She didn’t want to go over this same topic again, not tonight. ‘I’ve told you before, Mum. Dad knows where I live, and if he badly wants to see me, he can always come here.’
Daisy’s face fell, then opening the door, she said over her shoulder, ‘It works both ways, Ruby. Remember that, it works both ways.’
Ruby watched as the two women departed through the garden, then shut the door. Making her way back to the fire, she sat down wearily. She was grateful for her mother’s offer, but she couldn’t go back to the house she had once shared with her father – not until he asked, and knowing him as she did, that request would never be forthcoming. When tears prickled behind her eyelids, she shook herself angrily, then thought yearningly of her soft feather bed, but she was certainly not going to sleep with Michael tonight. Despite the light relief of seeing him being bundled unceremoniously out by her mother and Lily, she was still angry with him for the way he’d behaved. He should have been with her after the funeral, not off getting drunk in some pub. She hadn’t been surprised, but it still hurt to think he cared so little for her th
at he could leave her when she so much needed him. She began to think back.
It was nearly nine years since she’d last seen her father. When Dr Benson had placed the newborn Danny in her arms, she had prayed that once her father knew he had a grandson, he would swallow his pride and come to see her, but she had waited in vain. Even the weekly visits from her mother and Lily, and the periodic visits from George and Bertie, couldn’t erase her need to see her father again. If only there were some way of healing the rift between them without losing face, she would grab at it, and so would Bertie. Like her, he hadn’t seen his father since the day they had both stormed out of their former home.
Fighting to keep her eyes open, she dragged herself from the comfort of the settee and opened the bedroom door. Careful not to disturb Michael, she pulled her nightdress from beneath the pillow and quietly returned to the living room. Once undressed, she quickly unhooked the mesh corset and leather straps and sighed with relief as the wretched leg was set free from her aching stump. Pushing the whole lot out of sight, she banked down the fire and settled herself on the settee.
She could feel the comforting warmth of the fire adding to her tiredness. Before she finally closed her eyes, she thought, ‘I’ll go and see Bertie; see if we can find some way of making up with Dad without losing face. Oh, damn it, what difference does it make!’ She cared no more about false pride: if she had to humble herself, then so be it, she was willing to take the chance of rejection. What had she to lose? She didn’t know if Bertie would feel the same way; in fact she hardly saw him nowadays, not since he’d married that girl from Boots just over a year ago. She must make the effort to visit them more often, for she didn’t want to lose touch with her brother as well as her father, but it was difficult, what with Michael and Bertie not getting on. ‘Oh, go to sleep, woman,’ she chided herself. ‘Worry about getting yourself and Michael sorted out before planning how to get the family back together again.’ Her eyelids were so heavy, so very, very heavy. Her last thought before sleep overtook her was the knowledge that with all the commotion with Danny and then Michael, she hadn’t had the chance to tell her mother how much Mabel had left her in her will.
