“What are we doing out here?” she finally asks.
“I wanted to tell you about this.”
“Right.” She crosses her arms. “We could have done that anywhere. What are we doing in this jeep?”
I smile and close the laptop. “Because I didn’t just want to tell you about this.”
She glares at me. “Uh-huh.”
“If we happen to make-out, too, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world,” I smirk. Her eyes roll back and she reaches for the door handle beside her. “I’m kidding!” I grab her arm but she shoots a hard look at me and I fall back. “I would, however, like to talk about the other night—”
“No.”
“Caleb, come on. Contrary to my behavior sometimes, I am not fourteen,” I joke, drawing a fraction of a smile on her mouth. “We’re adults and I would like to talk about the other night like adults. Please?”
She lowers her hand from the door handle and settles back against the door, arms crossed like a pair of thick armor. “Okay.”
I take a deep breath and look into her eyes, instantly getting stunned into silence. Fuck, she’s perfect. Beautiful, strong — inside and out. Mysterious, charismatic. I can’t get her out of my head nor can I get the taste of her off my lips — not that I’m complaining or anything.
“Well?” she asks.
“I don’t know,” I choke. “That’s as far as I got.”
Caleb sighs. “You can start with an apology.”
“An apology?”
She nods. “Yeah, an apology.”
“I’m not going to apologize for kissing you,” I argue. “I’m not sorry.”
“It was highly inappropriate,” she says, her brow creasing with intensity.
I twist in the seat to face her. “I gave you a little peck, Caleb. You’re the one turned it into a full-blown, tongue-on-tongue—”
“I did not!”
“Oh, so you tripped and fell?” I ask, throwing all of my sarcasm into it. “Is that how we’re playing this?”
“I’m not playing anything—” She pauses and exhales a heavy sigh, “This is ridiculous. I’m leaving—”
“No—!” I latch onto her arm again and pull her away from the door.
“Let go of me.”
“Not until you admit that you kissed me back.”
“No.”
I tighten my grip around her wrist. “Then we’ll just have to sit here all night and you can explain to everyone else what we were doing out here when they catch us in the morning.”
“You really have no sense of decency, do you?”
I shrug. “It comes and goes.”
She tugs her arm but I don’t let go. “Carson.”
“Just admit it, Caleb.”
“What? That you’re an asshole? Done. You’re an asshole.”
“Admit that you kissed me, you liked it, and that you’ve been avoiding me ever since because you’re scared you’ll do it again.”
“Yeah, you’ve really got that like-an-adult thing down.”
I sigh and release her. “Fine. Don’t admit it. Doesn’t change the truth and we both know it.”
Her eyes twitch with anger as I ease back into the seat. I even rest my hands behind my head to sell the point home. I kissed her. She kissed me. She wants more.
“You’re wrong,” she says.
“Oh, yeah?” I smirk.
“Yeah.”
“Then why haven’t you left yet?”
She grits her perfect teeth. “You are so annoying.”
I laugh. “You’re stalling.”
“For what?” she scoffs. I grab her again and pull her across the seat. “Carson—”
I take her face in my hands. Her warm cheeks tickle my palms as I place my lips against hers, knowing full well she’s capable of breaking my nose with a single punch. Still — feeling her again, tasting her, kissing her, even for a moment… it’s worth the risk.
My heart slams in my chest. Desire overwhelms fear. My blood runs hot and fast, so quick it leaves my digits numb against the soft skin of her face. I suck lightly on her bottom lip as I pull away and I feel the tremor strike her entire body.
Caleb opens her jade eyes and stares into mine for a brief moment, silently reflecting on what I just did. I wish I could be a fly on the walls of her brain. It’d be nice to know whether or not I should block my balls right about now.
She licks her lips, trembling softly in my hands, and leans over to kiss me back. Just like the other night, she parts her lips and I feel the warm jerk of her tongue against mine. I pull her closer and she pushes up to straddle my waist, settling into my lap like a perfect puzzle piece.
My fingers crawl down her chest and a moan escapes her throat, tickling my lips as it vibrates off of hers. She slides her hard body against me and I twitch as every drop of blood inside of me travels south. I feel behind her, gliding my fingers beneath her shirt to touch her smooth skin. She reaches for my belt and my muscles lock.
Holy shit.
“Boxcar.”
I flinch. It’s the first time she’s ever called me that. “Yeah?”
She stares down at me, her eyes burrowing into mine. “If you tell anybody about this, I’ll kill you.”
I nod furiously. “Yes, ma’am.”
She kisses me again, this one firmer and harder while she tugs my belt free and slides my zipper down. I slip my hands beneath her shirt, taking aim for her breasts as I drop my kisses to the smooth skin of her neck. Her body quivers even more, falling deeper into my embrace and she moans softly as I pinch her earlobe between my teeth.
I feel an ache of disappointment as she pulls away suddenly but it all subsides when I realize she’s just sliding her pants to the floor. She’s right back on top of me in seconds, half naked and willing, and I feel the dripping warmth of her caressing against my shaft. I kiss her again while her hand reaches for my cock. She grips it and pauses for a quick moment, her blinking eyes glancing down to confirm my girth. She says nothing but I get the confidence boost of my life by staring into her impressed eyes.
I keep my gaze on her, letting her lead, longing for the moment when I’m finally inside of her. She slides my tip back, angling it to penetrate her but she doesn’t lower herself down. She lets it sit there, quivering against her entrance while her wetness drips onto me. I feel her body and squeeze her breasts, trying not to go crazy as she teases me.
Finally, she lowers herself onto me and she bites her lip to hold back her moan. Even I burrow my face in her chest to keep her overwhelming tightness from taking over me.
I lay my head back, almost ready to explode. “Oh, fuck—”
She clamps her lips down on mine and we moan into each other as she slowly grinds herself on me. Her hips glide up and down, perfectly clenching my cock from the inside. I buck upward to thrust in deeper with each grind of her waist and I hold her steady as she shakes on me.
“Shh—!”
Caleb slaps a hand over my mouth and locks her body in place above me as her eyes focus on something outside the windows. I slowly crane my neck to look out and I see a patrolman wandering alongside the jeeps, stepping softly against the sand. It takes all of my control to stop thrusting her. My dick begs for me to just keep going but I sit still, counting the excruciatingly long seconds as this fucking prick takes his sweet ass time moving on.
He rounds the corner and the second he drifts from sight, Caleb lowers her hand from my mouth and kisses me hard. She adjusts her movement to keep the jeep from rocking and drawing attention to our location, but she doesn’t stop that perfect grind on my cock inside of her.
I keep fucking her, the new fear of getting caught fueling an even greater pleasure. She grips my jacket and her body goes tense. Her face contorts with ecstasy, twisting even more as I push against a sweet spot inside of her. I grip her waist tighter, replicating the movement, memorizing every inch of her as lust colors her cheeks and she bites her lips to keep from screaming.
Cal
eb falls forward to stifle her moan against my shoulder and I smile even wider, feeling her tightness go wild as she climaxes on me.
I am a fucking god.
My balls tighten and I can’t hold back for another moment. I pull out of her as I come and point my tip into my shirt to keep from getting my DNA all over U.S. government property.
She stays still on top of me, desire hot on her breath. Her body shakes with each exhale, just like mine, but I can see the thoughts building behind her eyes.
Her eyes clamp shut, blocking me out. “Shit.” She slides off of me and falls onto the seat, reaching down to fish her pants off the car floor.
I push my spent cock back inside my briefs and pull them up. “Well, that—”
“Never happened.”
“Well… I wouldn’t say—”
“I would,” she interrupts again. “And if you know what’s good for you — you will, too.”
I watch her pull her panties back on, blinking with confusion. “Okay, hold on…”
“I can’t do this kind of thing,” she argues, still out of breath. “I have a reputation to keep here.”
“Okay, I get that, but… you kind of just did it.”
“And that was a mistake.”
I sigh, smiling. “Caleb, slow down.”
She zips her fly and pushes her feet back into her boots. “I have to go—”
I grab her arm. “Stop.” She freezes in place with her eyes on the floor, refusing to look at me. “Now, I said I wouldn’t tell anybody about this and I meant that. I’ll take this to the grave if you really want me to — but I won’t pretend it never happened.”
“Fine,” she says, flicking her dark eyes at me. “It happened. It was fun. We both enjoyed it — but it won’t happen again. It can’t.”
I let go of her. “Why not?”
“You know why not.”
“Yeah, yeah. Reputation and duty or whatever, but you’re not going to be out here forever,” I say.
She looks straight ahead. “This… this isn’t who I am. You’re not…” Her voice falls again.
And there it is. I’m not sure why I didn’t see it coming until this moment. This isn’t about her.
It’s about me.
“Oh.” I collapse into the seat. “I get it.” Why would she ever go for a asshole like me when she’s surrounded by heroes like Fox fucking Fitzpatrick? “You’re right. This was wrong. It shouldn’t happen again.”
I reach for my bag and throw it over my shoulder without looking at her.
“I’ll go first,” she says.
“Cool.”
She takes a quick look out the windows, checking for anyone passing by before climbing out and closing the door softly behind her.
So, that’s it; the end of my affair with Caleb Fawn. It crashed and burned just as quickly as it started but holy shit — it sure was fun while it lasted.
A smile climbs to my lips. I fucked the untouchable Caleb Fawn. Not only that, she enjoyed it. She even admitted it but she never had to — I fucking felt it and she sure as hell wasn’t faking it.
I’ll let this feeling linger for a few more minutes before heading back to the barracks and crashing right back down to zero.
I scoop my laptop off the floor and open it to see Marilyn Black staring back at me from the old photograph.
Caleb’s probably right. I absolutely should let this go but I suppose that’s the consequence of growing up a lonely kid with an overactive imagination. I’ve always had a thing for puzzles. Crossword, jigsaw — you name it. What I have here now is a bunch of corner and edge pieces with nothing in the middle to connect them together. I could keep digging through the box to figure out what the mystery picture is or I could move on and live with the unfinished puzzle lingering at the back of my head for the rest of my life. Of course, if I do that, then I sure as hell better have something better to occupy my head space.
I close my laptop and look around the jeep as my memories of the last half hour come crashing back in.
Caleb.
I think about her mewling on top of me and I smile.
There’s no way I can let this be a one-time thing.
I’m not leaving Afghanistan until I make Caleb Fawn fall in love with me.
Shouldn’t be too hard, right?
Chapter 14
Boxcar
Los Angeles
Present Day
“Caleb?”
I knock softly on her door. The ride back was excruciatingly long, mostly because of the time I spent in my head planning out what I was going to say to her. I have it all figured out; variations of phrases Fox told me plus plenty more of my own personal things that I’d only ever say out loud to her and no one else.
I just have to see her face and it’ll all come out.
“Caleb?”
I reach for the doorknob and twist it, feeling a sudden bolt of shock as the thing pushes open. Sure, Caleb is the only person that lives in this building but I doubt she’d leave her door unlocked, especially with the street access at the bottom of the stairs. I step inside and look around as another stab of guilt plunges deep.
The room is exactly as I left it. The bedsheets are still flung about. The pillows are ruffled. My nose fills with the very scent of her, enough to make me halt in my shoes and take notice of her — just like it always did since the moment I met her.
“Caleb?”
I check the bathroom but she isn’t there either. She could have gone out. If not, there’s only one other place she would be and that’s downstairs in her shop. I smile, remembering that there’s only one thing that never failed to relax her and if I were a betting man, that’s exactly where she’d go after what just happened between us.
I head for the back of her loft to the staircase leading down to her shop. As I push open the door, I instantly feel the weight of the room and it breaks me. Broken glass lies scattered about all over the damn floor beneath the shattered counter.
“Shit…” I mutter, looking around. “Shit.”
Whatever happened here, it wasn’t good.
And worse, it’s my fault.
“Caleb!”
I look up, scanning the corners for a security camera. There’s one in each corner and two more that cover the cash register and the front entrance. I rush to the management office in the back, biting my cheek in the hopes that they aren’t just dummy cameras to deter theft. Caleb’s just stubborn enough not to invest in a system and given the state of her bank accounts, she probably justified the non-expense of not having one.
The old office has two desks, one in each corner, and my eyes land on the one with the most ancient CRT monitor sitting on top. The monitor blinks as I flick it on, almost puttering out completely but it eventually kicks on, along with the VHS player connected to it with a tape inside labeled Sunday.
I shake my head, promising to install something a hell of a lot better than this when this is all over.
It’s an outdated system but it still works. I rewind the tape and every ounce of air dispels from my lungs and my heart expands several sizes, about ready to explode with anger.
From what I can see, Lilah Hart managed to break in through the alleyway exit behind the building just minutes after I walked out.
Ugh.
I should have stayed. Why didn’t I stay?
Caleb, where are you?
I fast-forward the tape, watching as Caleb enters the back of the shop and Lilah confronts her at the counter. Every second brings me closer to despair, knowing that I’m about to see one of two possible conclusions: A — that Caleb was defeated and kidnapped, or B — that Lilah made me a widower. Neither option will make me happy but one will definitely make me more pissed off than the other.
The fight begins and I can’t help but smile at the reminder that Caleb is a fucking badass. Sure, she’s beautiful and feminine and all that good stuff but that’s not what made me hard for her in the first place. It was the warrior in her that did that. T
here’s something undeniably sexy about a woman that can pin a full-grown man against the wall and make him beg for his mommy.
My heart sinks as a dark shadow enters in through the back and sneaks up behind her. Caleb had Lilah on the damn floor and Elijah just swoops in — that fucking bastard.
Fuck. I should have stayed. This would have been a fair fight if I had.
Caleb collapses in his arms and my rage wins.
Fuck this shit.
I’m getting my wife back.
I’ve got the drive, I’ve got the determination, and most of all, I’ve got Caleb Fawn’s secret back room to arm myself with. The Harts probably didn’t even realize it was here and Caleb was smart enough not to draw Lilah’s attention towards it during their fight.
I walk inside and breathe in that old, nostalgic smell of assault rifles and gunpowder. A smile strikes me once more as I flick on the light and my eyes fall on the guns lined along the walls.
The alleyway door opens and closes.
I freeze, sensing hard boots tapping against the hallway floor. My eyes scan for the nearest available weapon and my lips twitch at the sight of Caleb’s “special occasion” gun: her Model 60 Smith & Wesson revolver, obviously returned to her since Fox and Dani’s cross country excursion a few weeks back. She never let me even hold it before and there’s no way I’m going to pass up the opportunity now. I grab it off the wall and confirm it’s loaded as the boots step further inside the shop.
I kneel down and wait, trying to get a better look at whoever the hell this is. The Harts must have come back. Maybe they saw me go inside and they decided to come finish me off. I won’t make it that easy, that’s for sure.
As I prepare to leap out, my heart stops in my chest. Every man has imagined themselves in this situation before: guns drawn with the villain in their sights and a very grateful damsel hanging on their arm but no one really considers what it’s actually like. I take a breath, forcing the crippling doubt away before standing up and pointing my gun at the dark figure lingering around the shop.
“Hold it.” I lock my body, refusing to let it tremble. “Let me see your hands.”
Love and Wargames: A Bad Boy Hacker Romance Page 10
