by A. J. Wynter
“So, you’re not just stubborn, you’re stupid as well,” Mary had tears in her eyes.
“Thanks for the sandwich,” Russell muttered and turned his back on Mary.
Mary watched Russell leave and the saloon doors were still swinging when she picked up the phone.
“We’ve got a problem.”
Chapter 35 - Sydney
Sydney thought that distance and time would make the ache that was slowly consuming her body, go away. The mornings were the worst. She would wake up to the quiet of her parents’ giant home. The call of the ranch's resident rooster replaced by the din of the house’s staff shuffling about. The scrappy quilt on the pine twin bed replaced by her Egyptian cotton duvet cover. She had dreamt about Russell every night and had woken to a tear-soaked pillowcase and an ache inside her body that intensified when her brain realized that it had all been a dream and that she wasn't folded in the warmth of Russell's strong arms.
Her sadness was quickly replaced with anger when she imagined those arms around Sherry, her teased hair splayed on her old bed in the little cabin.
She rolled over and picked up her phone. She went back and forth between wanting Russell to call to win her back and wanting to never hear from him again. In the first scenario, she went back and forth between rushing back to Texas and telling him to fuck off.
She saw that she had missed a call from Lainey and pressed the screen to return her call.
"How are you doing kid?" Lainey answered.
"Kid? I'm pretty sure that I'm two months older than you."
"Details, details."
Sydney could hear her friend smiling over the phone. She looked at her clock and saw that it was nine in the morning. "Why are you so bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this morning?"
Lainey laughed, "I know, it's godawful getting up this early."
Lainey had always been a night owl and when she didn't have class was lucky to roll out of bed before noon.
"I booked us a spa day. Get out of bed and stop feeling sorry for yourself."
Sydney groaned. The last thing that she wanted to do was sit around getting her nails done.
"Come on," Lainey prodded. "I've seen the callouses on those man hands of yours. It's time to treat yourself. And you sat in a car for three days, a massage never hurt anyone."
"I can't. I have plans." Sydney lied.
"What are those plans? Lying in bed and staring at the wall all day? Get up. I'm coming to get you."
"Lainey, I can't." The idea of getting out of bed and showering seemed overwhelming to Sydney. Leaving the house to go anywhere but the barn an insurmountable feat.
"I thought that you would say that. I'm at your gate. Buzz me in."
Sydney groaned and clicked the security app on her phone, opening the main gates to the house. She threw back her heavy blankets and rolled out of bed. She heard their doorman, James, greeting Lainey and then Lainey's steps as she bounded up the rounded staircase.
Lainey burst into the room. "You look worse than I thought you would," she said, taking in Sydney's rumpled hair and yesterday's clothes. "You were wearing that shirt the last time I saw you."
Sydney grunted and dramatically pulled the duvet over her head. Lainey lunged to the foot of the bed and pulled the covers off and tossed them onto the floor. "Get up. I can't stand to see you wallowing like this."
"What if I like wallow--" Sydney's protest was interrupted by the rooster ringtone from her phone. She glanced over and saw that it was a Texas area code.
"Who is it?" Lainey said, trying to grab at the phone.
"I don't know the number, but it's from Texas," Sydney said, staring down at the screen, her curiosity piqued.
"Don't answer it," Lainey tried to grab at the phone again, but Sydney's reflexes were too fast, and she accepted the call.
"H-h-hello?" she said, her heart hammering in her chest.
"Sydney?"
Her heart plummeted when it was a woman's voice on the other end of the phone and not Russell's honey baritone.
"Yes, this is Sydney." She raised her eyebrows and shrugged her shoulders at Lainey.
"You have to stop Russ." The voice was definitely a woman's voice, but the gruffness and lack of any perfunctory politeness gave Mary away immediately.
"Hi, Mary. I'm in Connecticut."
"I know damn well where you are. You're the only person who can stop him."
Sydney rubbed her eyes and swung her leg out of bed, her heart in her throat.
"Mary, I don't care what Russell is doing. I'm back in Connecticut and don't think that I will ever speak to him ever again."
She heard Mary let out a giant sigh. "So, you're stupid too?"
"Excuse me?" Sydney was used to Mary's brusqueness, but a direct insult was out of character even for the curmudgeonly old lady.
"I should've told you, but I didn’t think Russ would do it."
Sydney was getting more and more confused by the minute and her irritation was starting to grow. "Do what Mary? Get on with it?"
"Ugh. Your daddy tried to bribe Russ to make you leave. When he didn't take the fifty thousand, I thought it wasn't going to be an issue. That man loves you."
"He doesn’t love me. He told me to leave." Sydney's voice shook.
"He did? Well, I know he didn't mean it."
"And how do you know that? And even if that's true, it doesn't excuse the fact that he left the bar with that waitress, Sherry."
"He did what with Sherry?" Sydney could hear the anger in Mary's voice and then heard a male voice and a shuffling of the old phone in the kitchen.
"Syd?" A male voice had taken over the call. "It's Eddie."
Lainey had sat down on the end of Sydney's bed and seemed entranced by the one side of the conversation that she could hear. "Hi, Ed. How's Applesauce doing?"
"Huh? Oh, the ‘stang. She's good, I guess. Listen, Syd. Russ didn't go home with Sherry. Well, I mean, technically, he did, but he slept on the couch. I know, because I was the one who went home with her. Russ was wasted drunk and muttering about making the worst mistake of his life and something about saving yours."
"You went home with Sherr--"
"It's Mary again,"
"Mary, you need to tell me what I need to stop." Sydney's mind was swimming with all of the new information. Russ hadn't gone home with Sherry. He did love her after all. Her dad tried to pay him to make her leave. That money could've changed Russ's life and he didn't take it.
"Russ is going to try to win you back. He thinks that money is what you need."
"I don't need money, Mary. What is Russ going to do?" she croaked, her throat constricted with worry. "Is it illegal?"
"It's worse. He's entered the town rodeo."
"Oh, my god, Mary. One small fall could--"
"Kill him. I know. Get back here and stop him. It's tomorrow."
"I--" but before Sydney could even respond to Mary's command, she had cut the connection.
Sydney stared at the blackness of her phone screen.
"I have to go to back to Texas,"
"Yes. Yes, you do," Lainey said. She pulled Sydney's suitcase out of her closet and opened it up. "Lucky for you, you haven't even unpacked yet."
Chapter 36 – Russell
"I'm not going to try to talk you out of this, because you're a man now and know full well that it's a terrible idea. But I know why you're doing it." Floyd stood at the arena door to the temporary staging area for the cowboys. Russ had pulled out his old fringed chaps and was buckling them on over his favorite Wranglers.
"I'll be fine, old man," Russ smiled and clapped Floyd on the shoulder. The old rancher seemed out of place in the hustle and bustle of the rodeo scene.
"I couldn't stop your Pa and that has haunted me my whole life," Floyd said and gripped Russell's shoulder as he walked by. He spun the young cowboy around and gripped him into a bear hug.
Russ was shocked, but he understood Floyd's concern. He wasn't used to emotion, let alone physical conta
ct from the old man, but relaxed into his arms. As he pulled back, Russell swore that he saw Floyd brush tears from his milky eyes. "Remember your breathing; you can do this," Floyd whispered.
"This isn't my first rodeo," Russell winked at Floyd, trying his best to lighten the sombre mood. He heard his name being called by one of the rodeo volunteers and strode off to prepare for the ride of his life. He had drawn one of the easier bulls, Tank, which meant his score might be less than if he had drawn one of the harder beasts. It was good because he felt confident that he could eight second Tank but would've preferred one of the more challenging bulls. He needed a flawless ride to impress the judges and win the prize money.
He climbed the cage and one of the young cowboys helped him mount the bull. He went into autopilot, his pre-ride routine second nature. He ran his glove along the rope and then shoved his hand into place. His impact vest felt like an old friend. He wanted to keep everything the same as it had been, which was why he refused to wear a helmet. When he was the number one cowboy on the circuit, he was known for his deep blue Stetson and matching fringed chaps. A helmet might throw him off his game; a dangerous choice, he knew. One kick from the bull could end it for him, but he was a lot more like Floyd that he thought. A stubborn old bastard.
He glanced around the arena. It wasn't the giant stadiums from his past, but the small-town venue was packed to the gills. It felt good to feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins, and when his name was announced the crowd went crazy.
He took his customary two deep breaths, inhaling counting to five, holding, and then exhaling counting to seven. It was a ritual that he and his coach at the time, Floyd, had crafted that really helped to get him in the right mindset. He held his breath and then exhaled.
7… 6… 5… 4… 3… 2… 1…
Then his heart stopped as his eyes found hers amongst the thousands in the arena.
The horn sounded and the gate that had been holding back the raging Tank swung open.
Chapter 37 -- Sydney
Syd was shocked by how many people were at the arena, it seemed like every person in Claystream and every town for hundreds of miles was at the rodeo. She and Lainey parked the rental car a mile away and rushed to the arena.
Sydney had tried to call Russell, to try to talk some sense into him, but he hadn't returned any of her frantic voicemails or text messages.
"Where could he be?" Sydney asked Lainey and she frantically scanned the arena. The rodeo scene was completely foreign to her, she didn’t know if the cowboys would be assembled somewhere, like a backstage area, or if they would be just wandering around amongst the spectators. She was fighting her way through the crowd, trying to get to the chutes that held the bulls. She didn't want to watch but was drawn to the scene like a moth to a flame. The cowboys would come flying out of the pen, practically tied to the raging bull, whose only goal was to get the idiot human off its back and free up its testicles.
The arena smelled like manure, sweat, and deep-fried pickles. There was a cowboy with a black helmet in the pen wearing a red vest over a red western shirt, but he seemed too small to be Russ. His was the body of a teenager. A body that was supple, with a spine that could handle the whims of a raging two thousand pound animal. She watched as the red-vested kid was bucked, the time clock registering 2.1 seconds. His body landed in the dirt with a thud, the two cowboys in the ring distracted the angry animal as the red-vested kid scrambled to his feet, the crowd cheering.
Sydney didn't know what she was going to say to Russ when she saw him, but she knew that she couldn't let him go through with this.
"Where are we? This is a whole other world," Lainey said, her eyes open wide as she took in the contest. "Do you see him?"
The loudspeaker crackled, and the announcer called out the results from the ride and then she heard the words she had been dreading.
"Next up. Russell Ryder, riding Tank."
"No!" she screamed and pushed her way through the crowd to the edge of the seating area, only to be stopped by tall chain link fencing. "Excuse me, pardon me," she said as she shimmied along the temporary fencing, trying to make her way to the staging area, her eyes glued to her cowboy. She could see him breathing. She longed for him to open his eyes - eyes the same color as his hat and chaps.
She saw the countdown and gripped the wire fencing screaming his name, her screams lost in the roar of the crowd. She could feel the tears welling up in her eyes as she screamed his name again. This time he opened his eyes and they met hers. She knew that it was crazy, that amongst thousands of people in the arena, that he could see her, but she could feel it. She knew in her heart that he saw her.
Then the gate opened.
Sydney kept fighting through the crowd and found a gap in the fencing. She held her breath as Tank the bull burst from his enclosure. With every second that passed, the crowd got louder. Every muscle in her body was tense as she watched Russ's body get rocked by the bull. She was in awe of how calm he seemed, his gloved hand high in the air, waving and countering the bucking, his hips glued the bull and rocking with its movements. Her fear was joined by pride as she watched Russ in his element. Five seconds had never felt so long in Sydney's life. She held her breath as five turned to six seconds and then seven. When the timer hit eight the crowd erupted, and Sydney screamed with them, finally releasing her breath. Then, instead of gracefully soaring off the bull, she saw the animal rock its massive horned head down as it leapt into the air, its head collided with Russ's and sent his limp body flying through the air. His blue hat landed in the dirt, trampled instantly by the bull.
"Russ!" Sydney screamed and leapt over the boards.
One of the cowboys in the ring tried to stop her, but she shoved him out of the way. She slid into the dirt on her knees beside Russ.
"Russ!"
He turned his head to look at her and smiled, "Syd. I did it."
"You did," she said, smiling through her tears at him. She leaned down and planted a long, lingering kiss on his lips.
"I love you, Sydney," Russ murmured, his head lolling from side to side, his eyes closing as his lost consciousness.
"I love you too, Russ." Sydney was now sobbing. "Don't leave me, Russ. Don't leave me!" Sydney screamed.
The medics pulled Sydney away from Russ's unconscious body and went to work. A pair of arms gripped Sydney and held her firmly as she flailed, trying to get to Russ' side.
"There's nothing you can do now," Floyd's voice said.
"There's nothing you can do now."
Epilogue
The pews in the little white town church were crammed full of mourning townspeople. Lainey pulled a fan out of her clutch and fanned her face and then Sydney's. They had been able to get seats, but many others hadn't, lining up at the back of the small building.
Sydney didn't think that her body was capable of crying again, and she was able to hold it together when the organ started to play a solemn hymn, but when she saw Mary's shoulders rise with a sob, that's when she lost it. Tears spilled down her warm cheeks and Lainey pulled a tissue from her small handbag and wordlessly handed it to her.
She rubbed her hand across her belly, trying to soothe the tiny life growing within. She wasn't showing yet, but morning sickness had reared its ugly head with a vengeance. She prayed that she was able to keep down the small bowl of oatmeal Mary had prepared this morning.
She looked around the crowded room and met a few familiar sets of eyes. Everyone stood as the pallbearers entered the church carrying the gleaming coffin. Eddie, Carter, and Brodie, along with three other stoic-looking young cowboys marched down the aisle carrying the body of their friend. Eddie met Sydney's eyes and he gave her a meek smile as a lone tear trailed down his tanned face.
"He really was loved by so many people," the old lady seated on the other side of Sydney whispered.
Sydney nodded, and she reached forward and squeezed Mary's shoulder. Mary reached and grasped Sydney's hand without turning her head.
&nbs
p; The clicking of Russ's cane on the wooden floorboards followed the coffin. He limped along behind the procession, his left arm and left leg both immobile from the plaster casts. Russ still couldn't turn his head without discomfort, although Sydney knew that wasn't the reason he couldn't meet the faces of the mourners.
Floyd had been like a father to Russ. On the day of Floyd’s heart attack, Russ confessed that losing Floyd had been worse than losing his biological father. The pallbearers all took seats at the front of the chapel, their cowboy hats in their laps.
Russ was wearing Floyd's battered old hat and paused to place it on the coffin before easing into the wooden pew.
The service was filled with loving eulogies about the man Sydney had grown to love. He had welcomed her back to the ranch and even given her a raise. She hadn't told him that her father had fully disowned her once she told him that she was moving back to Texas to be a horse trainer. She hadn't even told her parents about the pregnancy. They were never going to get to know their grandson or granddaughter, and now, neither was Floyd.
There was a small get together after the service, complete with triangle sandwiches made by the church women's auxiliary. The room was filled with the kind of sad laughter that only accompanied the celebration of the life of someone well-loved.
Mary sidled up to Sydney and Lainey. "So, how far along are you, kid?"
Sydney turned to Lainey and shot her an accusatory glance. Lainey just shrugged and sauntered off to the dessert table. "She didn't have to tell me. I can see it in the way you're walking. By the way, you and Russ are going to have a son."
"Mary, I--" Sydney started to respond, but in classic Mary fashion, she walked off without waiting for a response. Sydney looked around for Lainey and discovered that she was surrounded by Eddie, Carter, and Brodie. Syd caught her eye and shook her head no, but Lainey laughed and continued pretending to be fascinated by whatever the boys were saying to her. Syd felt a strong arm weave around her waist and Russ's warm breath on her ear. She turned to see him balancing precariously without his cane. She gave him a kiss on the cheek, "are you alright?"
