by S. S. Engle
“Thank you.”
“Your welcome. But I don’t think I understand what you’re thanking me for.”
“Being honest, for one thing. I hate it when people speak to me as though they think they’re trying to protect my feelings. As if the truth will just shatter me. I’m no child.”
“No, you’re most certainly not.”
“We’ve come to a dead end.”
“That isn’t exactly true. We could turn around, walk back to the ship, we’ll be back in about a half an hour. Or we could go this way.”
“What way? Up there?”
“Yes. And if we did that, we’d just be walking around some more, for who knows how long. Your choice sweetheart. What do you want to do?”
“Let’s go up there.”
“You sure?”
“Positive. I don’t want to go back yet.”
“Alright. Let’s see where this takes us. Here, take my hand, the rocks look slippery.”
Up above the caves on the surface Blue and Silas were out on their routine patrols of the city. Tonight, Asa had assigned them to keep watch over the unusual sounds that had been coming up through the piping systems in Engia. Assuming the Dreadcranks had taken up refuge in the old abandoned palace Blue went there first. Upon finding nothing he was disappointed to return back to the O’Brien mansion without anything to show for it. Silas was indifferent as usual. Wanting to stay the night in the palace and take advantage of having such a luxury to themselves for once. But Blue was all about work tonight, and wanted to investigate the sounds they could hear quite clearly now at the palace. It was almost as if it was magnified here. But outside the sound was stronger, and Blue remembered the Lydia being underground. What need of repair it was in. It had to be the source of activity, and it would explain the sounds travelling through the pipes in the city. Silas was less than eager to go gallivanting around a cave system underground at night, but he had no choice in the matter. After stealing a few supplies form the palace they set off for some sort of relief where they could drop down into. When Blue began listening carefully however, he locked onto a sound he just couldn’t ignore. It was Kassidy’s voice, and she was close. Not far off there was a hole in the ground that acted as a waterfall when it rained, but seeing as how the weather was cooperating it was open to the moonlight up above. Down below Luca had led Kassidy right to the opening underground, and they sat on a rock that jutted out to soak up the light from up above. Kassidy noticed quickly that Luca was cold, and against his toughest refusals she wrapped the blanket around the pair of them and she tucked in close to his side as he uncomfortably placed his arm around her back.
“Sorry about this.”
“About what? This was just what I needed tonight. To get away from it all. You were right.”
“It’s just that, you’re so cold, I shouldn’t have brought you out here. If I were any kind of responsible man I’d have kept you close to a fire.”
“Luca stop.”
“And even then, I’m such a terrible man for not being able to keep you warm right now. I mean, I wish I could hold you with two arms right now.”
“You hold me better with one arm than any other man ever has with two.”
“You’re just being kind for my benefit. It’s a lie, but it’s sweet so I’ll take it.”
“I’d never lie to you about how good of a man you are Luca.”
“You’re biased. Blue was right back at the brothel. If you knew what I’ve done all these years, you wouldn’t want to be sitting so close to me.”
“And if you knew what I had done to men in my past, you wouldn’t even want to think about me. So we’ve both got our faults.”
“Can I tell you something?”
“Of course.”
“What would you say if I told you that I was thinking about getting away from this place for a while?”
“What do you mean? Where would you go? What would happen to the Dreadcranks?”
“Alright forget I said anything.”
“No. Forget what I said. Go on. If you were to leave Engia, where would you go?”
“Rusten Island.”
“Who’s waiting for you there?”
“Who?”
“What! I said what. What’s waiting for you there?”
“Allies. More guys like me that Engia has thrown away. Numbers we’d need to fight this war that’s ahead of us.”
“I thought you said we should leave our problems behind us on this walk?”
“Some things you just can’t get away from.”
“I can’t help but feel like it’s not things you’re trying to run away from, but rather people.”
“Some people. Sure, I wouldn’t mind never seeing Blue’s damn face again. But we all know that’s impossible.”
“I was being serious.”
“I was too. And it’s not like if I left I’d be leaving everyone behind.”
“You wouldn’t?”
“Come with me.”
“I can’t believe you’re asking me this.”
“Please?”
“I can’t. I left before, and I turned my back on Engia. But the problems didn’t go away Luca. They just got worse. I can’t leave. Not everyone…”
“Did you hear that too?”
“What was that?”
“The rocks are moving. We’ve got to get out of here!”
“Luca I can’t! I can’t make that jump!”
“Yes you can! Just trust me! I’ll catch you! If you don’t move, you’ll be crushed! Come on sweetheart let’s move!”
“We shouldn’t have come here! They won’t find us out here!”
“They won’t have to find us if you’d just jump!”
“They won’t be able to find our bodies! LUCA!”
The cave collapsed upon itself. Had it been naturally occurring the rocks would have been much easier to deal with, falling in a predictable downwards motion. But this was anything typical. Why Luca couldn’t figure it out was because up above on the surface Blue and Silas had set up explosives to blast open parts of the cave. They too were knocked back from the blasts and rendered temporarily unconscious from lack of a proper shelter. Luca broke up out of the rubble first. He saw the cave was a room full of rock now, with a ceiling of sky. His leg was partially pinned, and he knew he was pretty seriously injured, but he’d gone through the pain of losing an arm before. In comparison, this was nothing. What really bothered him now was how quiet everything was. As the dust cloud settled only the moonlight illuminated what was left behind. The path back to the Lydia and the gang was blocked. Kassidy screaming earlier about them not being found was now a legitimate concern. Kassidy. Luca was flooded with a rush of panic all through his body. He began throwing the rocks off of him in all directions trying to find sign of where Kassidy was. He began yelling her name but she wasn’t answering. The guilt of being the last person with her alive was settling in fast on his conscious. So much so he didn’t even notice Blue and Silas crawling into the opening of the cave now.
It was Blue who noticed Kassidy first. Her left arm was sticking out of a pile of rocks in an odd angle. He ran over to her at once, which caught Luca’s attention as he was nearly pushed over. The two men fought for Kassidy’s pile by shoving off
the biggest rocks they could find to free her body as fast as possible. When they found her face they realized she wasn’t awake and barely breathing. Together they pulled her body out of the rubble and it was demoralizing seeing how limp she was. Silas was hesitant in the back, watching over the men bicker back and forth about what needed to be done to try and save her life now. But Luca was on the losing end this time. He knew Asa had access to the best doctors in the entire city, and if Kassidy had any chance of waking up again, it was better if Blue took her away at once. Before Blue and Silas took her body back up to the surface Luca held her face in his hands and traced the scar across her cheek. Blue watched, and shame fell across his face as Luca looked up at him. They weren’
t proud of being responsible for this, both men now taking direct blame for Kassidy’s injury without out rightly confessing it to the other.
“I swear on her life Blue, if anything happens to her while she’s in your care, I’ll hunt you down and kill you like the dog you are.”
“If it wasn’t for me she might as well be dead already. But you have my word Lucky, I swear on her life, no harm will come to her. I just want to see those green eyes of hers again. Even if she is yelling at me once she’s awake. I’ll take that.”
“You let me know as soon as she’s awake.”
“How?”
“How’d you find me tonight?”
“Alright. I’ll let you know.”
“I mean it Blue! The second she’s awake I want you to send somebody to find me!”
“And what if she doesn’t wake up?”
“I don’t want to think about that right now.”
“But what if she doesn’t wake up Lucky? It won’t be my fault if she can’t be saved after this.”
“Then don’t bother sending anyone. I’ll already know.”
“How?”
“I just will. Now go! You’re wasting time. Every second counts right now. She’s a fighter, but I don’t know how much she can take. I wouldn’t want to bet on that right now. I just want her awake. I want her back. She’s so cold right now. GO!”
“I’m already gone.”
5
It’d been a week since the cave in. Kassidy had been taken to Engia General Hospital in the center of town and placed in the intensive care unit under critical condition. Per Asa’s request he paid for the best medical care he could get his hands on, no questions asked. The papers were all ordered to stay away, and the mystery patient that had the city waiting on pins and needles for was becoming everyone’s personal dilemma. Asa still had the Ringers to run, and the Dreadcranks to subdue, but he made nightly visits to keep tabs on Kassidy’s progress. For six days she’d been virtually comatose, breathing but labored, a permanent scowl of pain creased into her forehead. Blue and Silas made visits every morning, sometimes Blue would even come in twice a day, just on his own. But it was Harlan that had made the hospital room his newest residence. He had an extra cot pulled in for himself, and the nurses knew better than to fight with an O’Brien’s wishes, even if it was just the more mild tempered Haran. As far as he was concerned he had lost touch with her once, and it was terrible for him not knowing what had happened to her. But knowing such a fate as this, to know she had died, that’d be excruciating for him. He’d rely on no news bearer to keep him informed. She was worth staying up at odd hours of the night to hear the steam pump the machines that kept her alive.
It was on the ninth night after Asa had already made routine stop when another visitor arrived. He was alone, and when Harlan was woken up by the familiar sound of cogs ticking he felt a sudden rush of relief come over him. He sat up in his cot and saw Luca peering in through the window from a distance. The dim lights in the hall were almost pointless to see into the rooms with. Without hesitation Harlan got up to let Luca in, but Luca stepped back into the darkness when Harlan reached the door. Harlan hadn’t expected such a standoffish reaction, especially once Luca had already come so close. Confused, Harlan crept out into the hallway and closed the door behind him to speak to Luca in the hallway. Harlan ushered Luca up to the window to get a better look, insisting it was alright. Luca was slow, as if he’d just been instructed to witness a horrifying and gruesome scene. Kassidy was strapped to her bed at the wrists, arms, ankles, and waist for her known violent nature. She was hooked up to multiple machines, tubes running up her nose
and into her arm. Luca couldn’t bring himself to hold his eyes on Kassidy for much longer than a handful of seconds at a time. But at the same time, he couldn’t keep from repeatedly looking back at her every few seconds just to try and catch a miraculous glimpse of her awake. Harlan was already half asleep, but even he could see something was seriously wrong with Luca.
“Well, are you going to go in there and see her or not?”
“I can’t go in there.”
“Why not?”
“I can’t.”
“It took you nine days to come down here and visit her. You came all this way. The least you could do is go in there and talk to her.”
“What’s the use? She won’t be able to hear me. And even if she could, it wouldn’t do her any good.”
“Of course it would! Every little bit helps.”
“Has she woken up at all?”
“No.”
“Not even a little?”
“No. Is that why it took you so long to come by?”
“I told Blue to send someone to get me when she woke up. I figured if nobody showed up then that meant the worse. And I thought if she did die, I thought I’d just know.”
“So you came by tonight because you had the feeling she was dead already?”
“No. No I knew she’d pull through. She’s too strong of a person to let go so easily. She’s got so much left that she wants to do. So many more people she wants to help. She wouldn’t give up on them.”
“Then why did you come by Lucky?”
“I can’t stay here anymore.”
“The hospital is more than safe…”
“No, here as in Engia. I’m leaving the city tonight.”
“Where are you going?!”
“I’m taking the Dreadcranks up to Rusten Island. We’ll be able to recruit there, live safely, walk around during the daylight, and be ourselves.”
“When will you be back?”
“I don’t know if I will come back.”
“What in the hell am I supposed to tell Kassidy when she wakes up?!”
“Whatever you want. But I can’t do this to her anymore. It’s not fair. I understand that now. I’m no good for her. Look at all the danger I’ve put her in. She survived for years on her own as the Pyrette Queen. She comes back to Engia for a couple months and runs into me, and it’s all downhill from there.”
“You can’t make yourself responsible for everything that’s happened to her since she’s been back.”
“But I am fully responsible for this. And if that’s all then it’s enough. Look at her O’Brien.”
“I have been. I’ve been doing nothing but looking at her for nine days straight. And frankly I don’t know how much more I can take of it myself. She’s got to wake up soon.”
“I made sure she was going to be alright before Blue took her from the cave. And that’s why I came here tonight. I just had to see her one last time.”
“You’re making a huge mistake Lucky. You can’t just walk out of her life like this. She’ll never forgive you.”
“She doesn’t have to. I’m making the decision I know she’d never make for herself, it’s the best thing for her.”
“Lucky you can’t do this. You can’t leave!”
“Watch me.”
“Fine. But let me get something out first at least. If she can’t say this, then you should at least know. Look, I know we’ve never been close.”
“That’s an understatement.”
“And I know we won’t ever be friends. But I’m smart enough to know this; I know who Kassidy has to choose between. She won’t choose me Lucky. Hell, I wouldn’t even choose me.”
“Is this you stepping back or something?”
“It is.”
“Why? Why now?”
“I love her enough to know that it’s not me that she’s in love with.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“I think I do. And I think you know I’m right.”
“Shut up O’Brien! Look at her! I did this to her! Me! She’s not mine. She’s not my girl. And if she was smart she wouldn’t give a damn about me!”
“You idiot! She’s in love with you!”
“I have to go now. Tell her…tell her that I…I don’t even know what to tell her. Tell her anything, tell her nothing at all. Ju
st make sure she knows I did come to see her before I left.”
“That’s it then? You’re really leaving?”
“I’m late actually. The gang is waiting for me.”
“She’s waiting for you!”
“No. She has you. Let that be enough. Take good care of her. Keep her out of as much trouble as you can.”
