by Sloan Storm
Without any hesitation, Fiona nodded, “Yes, I think so.”
“Okay, that’s all I needed to hear.”
As I finished speaking, I placed my palm flat on the conference table and stood above her once more.
“I don’t care what it costs. I don’t care who you need to hire. And, I don’t care how long it takes. The world needs this technology, and if we can somehow bring the cancer treatment into play as well, all the better.”
Fiona looked up at me with an expression of bewilderment still on her face.
“New investors? I don’t understand. You’re just going to throw away everything that we’ve been working on?”
I shook my head.
“No, not at all. There’s every chance we can still salvage things and maybe bring some of the original investors back into the fold. But, that’s irrelevant right now. The most important thing is the work. It’s figuring out, once and for all, if we can actually do this and make a difference in the world.”
Fiona remained silent for several moments as she considered what I’d said.
“How much time do I have?” she asked.
“Somewhere between five minutes from now and all of eternity.” I replied, with a wink and a smile.
“Gabe, I’m serious. You know I can’t work without deadlines and structure.”
I nodded and knelt next to her once more. Moving closer to her face, I said, “Okay, Fiona, just for you… I promise I will put together a schedule, all right?”
The hint of a smile came to the corners of her mouth.
“Okay.”
“And here’s something else,” I began, as I reached towards her face and traced a line around her chin bone with my index finger. “Were going to dedicate it to your grandmother. How does that sound?”
No sooner had I finished my thought than Fiona’s eyes once again filled with a glasslike sheen. Without speaking a word, she bent forward at the waist and wrapped her arms around me, burying her face in the space between my neck and my shoulder. Between sobs, she thanked me.
As before, I stroked her hair and tried to ease her grief.
“Hey, this is a good thing! Just think about how proud your grandmother would be.”
I felt the heat from Fiona’s breath leave the skin of my neck as she pulled her head away and locked eyes with me.
“You’d really do that? Dedicate it to my grandmother?”
I shrugged. “Of course. Why not? I mean, she only raised the most beautiful, intelligent, headstrong and sexy scientist the world has ever known. I’d be almost stupid not to do it.”
Through a fresh round of tears, Fiona smiled and said, “I don’t know what to say. That’s just so… Incredible. Thank you.”
After she spoke, Fiona leaned in towards me, pressing her tender lips into mine. As we kissed, salty remnants of her tears found their way into my mouth. If my idea eased just a small part of her sadness, it would be worth it. And anyway I had every confidence that, with the right support team in place, somehow we’d find a way to make this work.
We separated from one another, and as we did I stood.
Turning my back to her, I walked in the direction of the conference room door. I arrived at it, and after reaching down to the handle, I pressed my thumb into the lock, clicking it closed.
Afterward, I turned back towards Fiona and smiled at her.
“Why did you do that?” she asked.
A grin spread across my face as I looked at her. “Just in case.”
With that, I made my way towards her once again and extended my hand as I drew close.
“I think we need to adjourn our meeting. Don’t you agree?”
Fiona reached up and slid her fingers into the palm of my hand. I closed my digits over hers and offered support while she used me as leverage to stand.
“Well, what are we going to tell Human Resources… not to mention your legal team? This is a clear violation of my contract you know.”
With my hand wrapped around hers, I pulled Fiona towards me until our bodies touched.
I looked down at her.
“How about we tell them to go fuck themselves?”
Fiona smiled as she looked up at me and nodded.
“Of course,” I began, as I pulled her body into mine, “There’s someone else I’d like to fuck first…”
FIONA
Immediately after my encounter with Gabe and for several days after, I had a difficult time coming to terms with my feelings towards him. It was difficult in the sense that I’d misjudged him. It was clear after what he’d promised to do, dedicating the project to the memory of my grandmother, that my initial beliefs about the goodness within him were true.
Even so, I’d been guilty many times in my life of thinking the best of people only to be let down by them at some point when I needed them most. And the truth was, no matter how wonderful I thought his gesture might be, no one had ever occupied a place in my heart like he did now.
Trusting him would mean risking not only my emotional well-being but in all likelihood, my fragile sanity. Even so, I reasoned I’d be far better off living in the warmth of his affection, even if it wouldn’t last forever, than condemning myself to a life devoid of risk-taking. Because, in the truest sense, the sympathy he’d shown me made me feel as if the chance was worth taking.
And so, I decided once and for all instead of doing what I normally do and analyzing everything to death, I would just trust Gabe, believe in him and allow things to play out as the universe saw fit.
At his direction, I wasted no time in replacing Amanda and Melissa. My inclination was to find candidates with suitable experience and seniority, but at Gabe’s urging, I instead settled for students only a couple of years out of graduate school.
I had my share of misgivings about his recommendation, because, in spite of their terrible behavior, both of the women were good scientists. His theory, which he claimed was backed by years of real-world evidence, was younger candidates were often hungrier for success and more easily trainable as a result.
And in a not-so-subtle way, he reminded me while he had no problem taking more time to get the project back on track, we didn’t have forever. By choosing scientists I could mold, we stood a far better chance of achieving success more quickly.
To my astonishment, Gabe was right.
Before long, the new team was coming along and making terrific strides.
It was a relief to have some of the burden removed from me, but also I felt a new sense of excitement about the project in general. Gabe had all but relaxed the relentless pressure he put on me in previous weeks and months. Ironically, where before I’d actually begun to resent the long hours and endless effort, I now found myself relishing the challenge of seeing the project through to its completion as soon as possible.
In fact, as the days turned into weeks, I grew more enthusiastic and energized. Not so much about finishing, although that was very important, but rather I felt a growing need to pay tribute to Gabe. The way he’d touched me awakened a new respect for the man and an appreciation for everything he strived to achieve.
In spite of all of the wonderful things happening at work, I still struggled with the loss of my grandmother on an almost daily basis. The fact that I still lived in the apartment we shared didn’t help, but until things were completely resolved with the project, I couldn’t risk moving and taking a chance on a new place.
The first couple of weeks after she died, I found myself unable to think about anything having to do with her. But as my mood started to brighten overall, I realized that was a mistake. Aside from the initial days after her passing when I cried almost nonstop, I hadn’t dealt with her passing in a healthy way.
And so, a couple of weeks after things changed between Gabe and me, I felt strong enough to return to the cemetery and visit her grave.
After parking my car, I made my way across the grounds towards her plot. As I did, memories of that terrible day flashed back into my consciousness.
The thing I remembered most was the pain. It was so deep and so profound I had no idea if it wouldn’t destroy me. At some point it had gotten so bad, making it to the next day was the furthest thing from my mind… I just hoped to make it to the next minute. Yet, as I meandered among the tombs, the suffering I’d felt seemed distant somehow.
I wasn’t sure why, but I was grateful for it.
At last I came upon her gravesite. Sitting down in the cool, lush grass, I drew my knees towards my chest, hugging them close as I looked down at her stone. Beside her was the burial site of my grandfather.
I sat there for several minutes in reverential silence, allowing the occasional warm breeze to blow through my hair and the heat of the afternoon sun to caress my skin. I realized what a gift it was, not only to be alive, but to have known someone so wonderful as my grandmother.
Soon, I began to speak out loud as if she were there, listening to me.
I told her everything that had happened between Gabe and me, leaving out no details. I would never have been so honest with her when she was still alive. It wasn’t that I was trying to hide anything from her. It was more that I didn’t want her to worry about me. But now, there was no longer a place for worry in our relationship, only truth.
Beyond the details of my personal relationship with Gabe, I told her about all of the good things happening in my life for a change. She’d always told me someday I would fulfill my dreams and wishes. The only wish I had that wouldn’t come true, of course, was she would be here to see the rest of them fulfilled.
As I talked away, somehow I’d lost track of time, and before I realized it, hours had gone by. For the first time in… months… I felt a sense of peace and calm in of all places, a cemetery.
Reaching down, I dragged the tips of my fingers along the indentations of the stone, tracing her name and birthdate as I went. At some point, I glanced over to my grandfather’s stone. He’d been gone for many years now, and the worn lettering on his tombstone reflected the time gone by.
As I looked down at the graves, I recalled how my grandmother used to speak about the day when she would pass away.
During all of that time, I never understood why she seemed not only at peace with the idea, but almost looking forward to it. My emotion surrounding it had nothing to do with my grandfather, but savoring the notion of death didn’t appeal to me. For years I convinced myself I felt that way because of my rational nature.
In contrast, she spoke of the time fondly, almost as if she couldn’t wait for it to occur.
Yet, as I’d grown closer to Gabe, there was a small part of me that began to understand what she meant. I’m not suggesting what was happening between Gabe and me was in any way similar to the type of love shared by my grandparents.
Their relationship was the rarest of all… they were true soulmates.
Yet, even so, the idea of not being able to see him, hold him, touch him or even smell him began to occupy my thoughts on an almost daily basis.
And so as I sat there, next to the gravesite of the most important person in my life, I felt as if I could at last understand what she meant. There was something beautiful about being so committed to one person. I wondered, in her last moments when she faced death head on, if the reassurance she had that she’d see my grandfather again didn’t give her the strength she needed to move on to the next life.
My grandmother wasn’t a foolish person, nor was she ignorant. She was a warm, intelligent and caring human being. Thinking back, I wished that instead of assigning some strange meaning to her longing to be with him again, I would’ve just asked her about it. Perhaps if I’d heard the words from her lips, they would have given me the strength I needed now.
I raised my hand to my mouth and kissed my fingertips.
Reaching down, I placed them on top of my grandfather’s tombstone first and next, my grandmother’s.
Focusing my attention on hers, I began to speak, “Grandmother, I’ll never be able to fully express my gratitude toward you. Without your kindness and guidance, I wouldn’t have survived. I only hope someday I can make you proud, and if I’m very lucky, I’ll find a man who brings the same meaning to my life as Grandfather did to yours.”
With that, I placed my palms flat against the thick tufts of grass surrounding the burial plot and stood once more. Before I turned to walk away, I took one last look down at their stones.
“I promise I’ll come back to visit as often as I can. I love you.”
As I returned to my car, a renewed sense of purpose filled me. Just as my grandmother felt her connection to my grandfather, so I began to feel it with Gabe. I wanted to do whatever I could, knowing no matter how things turned out between us, I’d given this project my all.
If there was any shred of hope we could turn things around and somehow convince the investors to move forward, I pledged to myself I wouldn’t rest until that was accomplished.
GABE
Although things were back on track once again with Fiona and the lab team, the unfortunate truth was, I still had to figure out what to tell the investors. They’d been more than patient, waiting for almost a month since we first arrived in St. Barth’s, and my ability to buy time was at its end.
I’d been thoroughly briefed by Fiona and other key lab members. Now it was up to me to figure out how to present what they told me in the best possible light.
In fact, I’d lost a good number of the smaller players, but luckily the ones with the deepest pockets remained interested. After a final push, I managed to coordinate a teleconference meeting with all of them and explain exactly where things were and what they could expect.
As backup, I gathered Don Cabot and his team to assist me during the hour-long discussion. Personally, I wasn’t a fan of these types of meetings, as I much preferred to deal with people face-to-face. But, the downside to dealing with exorbitantly wealthy people is that getting them all in the same place at the same time is difficult, if not impossible.
It was all the more reason I’d been kicking myself for allowing the meeting we did manage to pull off in St. Barth’s to completely disintegrate. However, that was in the past now, so I had to make the best of a bad situation.
I began the meeting by recapping what we’d done since we’d all been together in the islands. I wanted to reassure them that even though there had been problems and setbacks, we were well on our way to correcting them. I used the phrase ‘‘well on our way’ specifically because that’s where things stood.
Although we were getting closer to working out the challenges, we hadn’t yet, and as I wrapped up the discussion, I prepared myself for a barrage of questions.
It wasn’t long before they began to come in earnest.
I glanced at Don Cabot for a moment. Out of the view of the camera, Don simply shook his head as he looked at me. I couldn’t blame him for his reaction and doubt as to whether or not we were going to be able to pull this off.
But, at the same time, what choice did we have?
Just then, one of the investors, a real estate mogul from Beijing, fired a question at me. “Mr. Hawkins,” he began, as he looked into the camera with an unflinching stare. “For months now, you’ve more or less told us the same story. Why should this time be any different?”
I nodded as he finished speaking. As an active investor myself in a number of projects, I could relate to his sentiment.
“Excellent question. Does anyone else have a similar concern?” I asked.
Almost without exception, the group of virtual meeting attendees grunted and shifted about in their seats, indicating their shared displeasure.
“If you don’t mind, I’d like to ask all of you a question. Many of you I’ve known for a number of years—you’ve invested in my business and profited handsomely from it. I’ve never been a man who doesn’t deliver on his promises. Wouldn’t you all agree?”
I paused for a moment and waited to see if there would be any challenge to my question. Of course, I knew there wouldn’t b
e. I’d only asked the question to set the stage for what I would say next.
“Now, I’ll be the first to admit we’ve had some setbacks, and that yes, we are in fact still not prepared to do the presentation as I’d planned it in St. Barth’s. However, I remain as optimistic and focused as ever. I believe in what we’re doing, and I think all of us stand to profit at an outrageous level once we’ve achieved our objectives.”
Just as I was about to put a fine point on my statement, another one of the investors chimed in, interrupting me.
“Gabe, I think I speak for all of us when I say that none of us questions what you’ve done in the past. There’s no denying your track record and how successful you’ve been. But, this entire process has gone on for far too long and seems to be completely bogged down in mismanagement and more to the point… ineptitude.”
As he finished, I glanced at Don again. My senior executive looked at me with eyes wide as moons and shook his head back and forth, a clear warning I should measure my response. Ignoring him, I turned my attention back to the investors once again.
“So am I to understand you do not believe I’m going to be able to deliver what I promised? Because, that’s exactly what it sounds like.”
The attendees remained silent for a moment before shifting in their seats and clearing their throats in near unison once more, all indicators they doubted me.
I didn’t come from a wealthy family.
I built my billion-dollar business from nothing. But, I did come from a family where a man’s word is all he has. And now, unbelievably, these people for whom I’d made untold billions of dollars over the years questioned my promise to them.
Don knew good and well how that sort of innuendo would sit with me. In the past, I might have even considered letting it go, but after everything I’d been through not only with work but with Fiona in recent weeks, I’d reached my level of tolerance for bullshit.
“I’ve got something to say to all of you, and once I have, I think it’s safe to say that the meeting will be adjourned.” I stood there, without moving, barely breathing for a couple of moments. When I’d decided on what I wanted to tell them, I spoke once more. “I believe that I’ve always performed over the years, and frankly, I’m incredibly fucking insulted at the innuendo coming from all of you.”
