“So, it’s all of you or him?” she asked thoughtlessly.
“Yes. We can offer something else for trade. Cole made his decision foolishly, and he may pay the price. We all may. If they come down during a time of turmoil in Cole’s life, you will be useless to us as well,” Penemue said.
“They will kill him. Don’t stand there and sugar coat it. I will feel every moment of his death and every moment of his absence. If he is gone, I have nothing else to live for. This home you speak of, how is it home? You are unwanted, your families damned, your lovers’ souls trapped for an eternal damnation of agony and torture, and you ask me to save you?” Alice slouched in her kitchen chair, angry at the wood for once holding a spot for her love.
A thud against the door brought the conversation to dead silence. The door swung open violently, and Purah, with a wicked smirk, walked into the house. “Hello, am I interrupting a family meeting?”
“Just spit it out and go,” Alice said fuming with rage. She stood up fast enough that Jake actually had to grab her to keep her there.
“Feisty. Well, it’s rather simple. I have Cole; we want Alice, to talk privately, of course.”
“And if we don’t agree?” Sariel questioned.
“We torture him until you say yes or he dies.”
Alice launched toward the table, again being stopped by the Fallen in the room. Purah laughed and smiled at her. “These are your choices.”
“Alice?” Penemue asked, shocking everyone.
Alice stared at him, puzzled. “No,” her voice shocked her.
“No?” Purah asked, surprised.
“No, I will not talk to you, or trade. No trades will be made.” She slowly walked toward him. “You will return him to us or I will kill you.” He laughed for a moment, but something similar to fear fleetingly crossed his face. “I will save him and all those deserving of this supposed gift. When everything is done, I will kill you, if he is not returned to me by nightfall and I think that is generous. I will know if you touch one hair on his head, so don’t.” She felt stronger than she had ever felt for a split second, as if her angel DNA had taken hold of her for a moment, in order to relay a message to this traitor.
“His fate is in your hands,” he spat at Alice. She watched him turn and walk away. No one moved for a long time, listening to the sounds of the earth outside, making sure he really was gone.
“He’s gone,” Jake said breaking the silence.
“How do we get my son back?” Kokabiel asked. Alice wrapped her hand into his in silent understanding and hope.
“We can all go once we know where he is and storm the place,” Jake offered.
“No,” Penemue answered.
“What happened to you? You see my mother one time, which is a million times more than I was ever gifted with, and you suddenly can’t handle emotion?” Alice demanded.
“Alice!” Sariel bellowed.
“No! He’s back to being cold, heartless Penemue, and I want my father back! Don’t you see my heart breaking? Can you even hear me? I need you!” she screamed through a shaky voice with tear-soaked cheeks.
And just like that, Paul seeped out of the cracks of cold Penemue and scooped his daughter up. “I’m right here! I am so sorry. I feel as if I’m about to lose you, and I cannot handle losing you, too.” He soothed her back to a relatively calm state as the others watched Paul embrace his destiny.
He held his daughter so close, he was afraid he would crush her tiny frame. Something that had not happened to him since his true love was taken from him, started to erupt inside of him. Everyone watched as he allowed it to take hold and become a part of him. A tear swam from his glossy eye and slid down his chiseled cheek. He looked up at his brother for confirmation that it was truly happening. He had shut down his human emotions so long ago; it was nothing short of a miracle, or an abomination, for it to begin now. Some would think him weak, while others would be jealous of such a possibility.
He quieted the sounds around him and listened deeply to Alice. He could feel the terror and heartache this was causing. Knowing it was entirely different from feeling it; it was already killing her reason to live, to fight. He reached out to her to soothe the ache as well as he could, if only for a moment. She responded by tightening her arms around his waist and then she thought something he wished she hadn’t.
What if it was Marie? Would you allow her to die to save all of your kind? She pleaded to him with the only thing she hoped he could relate to, his love for Marie. The ache it caused erupted through him until he was forced to remove her from his arms.
“I’m sorry,” was all he managed to say, staring at his daughter, stunned. She was stronger than he had ever expected, and something was brewing inside of her that he did not understand or recognize. She was completely unaware of what she was doing, and that was more dangerous than a trade for the one you love. He watched his daughter’s eyes pierce, unintentionally, through his as she shared her gift of empathy with him. He knew she meant no harm and he assumed, being an angel that he could tolerate the emotional turmoil she was holding deep down inside of her. He was wrong. He collapsed to the floor in agony as his skin felt as if it were on fire.
“Dad!” Alice shrieked in panic.
“I’m okay, it was just too much. That’s what you deal with, all that human emotion all at once?” Paul asked through baited breath.
“Almost always, and not just humans. You just have to learn to block it out. When did you become so sensitive to it?”
“Maybe it’s because of your connection with Cole, maybe it’s affecting me, too. I’m not really sure what is happening,” Paul said scratching his head.
“That worries me,” Kokabiel said with furrowed brows. “You seem awfully quiet, Jake.”
“I was thinking. I know, let’s all be shocked,” Jake said, his voice thick with sarcasm.
“Don’t do that, Jake. You are not fooling anyone with that ‘I don’t give a crap’ attitude. You care, and I feel it no matter how much you push it away.” Alice’s eyes began to fill with salty tears, ready to emerge. The knowledge of it made her sad, as if the idea of ocean-like tears was painful. The ocean reminds me of Cole. As she said his name, though it was not out loud, a tear fell and slammed into the floor with a ferocious thud carrying all she had to endure. He did not envy his daughter and in that moment, he knew what he had to do.
“It’s time to vote on doing the trade for Cole,” Paul spoke clear and crisp.
“Right now? Are you kidding me?” Jake’s voice cracked as he spoke.
“Brother, as much as I want to save Cole, we cannot trade Alice. Perhaps a better plan?” Kokabiel offered, caught off guard.
“A vote? Is this a cruel joke?” Alice asked him.
“I vote nay to the trade,” Sariel interrupted.
“I vote nay to the trade but demand a proposal to save Cole,” Kokabiel said with a heavy heart.
“I vote yes to the trade, as stupid as it is,” Jake said.
“This is pointless, but I vote yes to the trade, for love,” Alice’s heart ached as she spoke. Everyone stared at Paul, curious and confused. It was time for him to show Alice what kind of man he could have been, what kind of father and, most of all, what kind of Angel he once was.
“I vote yes to the trade,” Paul said coolly.
“What!?” they all said in response.
Alice ran to him, wrapping her arms around his neck, her drenched face pressed into his neck, and all he could hear were the words “thank you, daddy,” cried out into his ear over and over again. In such a trying time, filled with such hurt, this was the first time he remembered what it was like to be one of God’s angels. How he could not love a being so strong and truly loving, beyond all faults? It was unjust. He would choose his daughter every time, and how his father could not choose all his children, was a mystery to him in this single moment.
Brother. Kokabiel pleaded.
He untangled, then peeled his daughter off of him and sighed
at his ungrateful brother. “Yes, brother, a plan so we do not lose Alice while we save your son.”
Kokabiel’s face lit up, “There you are, brother. I’ve missed you.” He laughed and pulled Paul into a hug. It had been a long time since he had felt this strong, powerful, healing, and filled with hope.
Cole fought his heavy eyelids in order to see the space around him. As much as he had hoped this was nothing more than a nightmare, this was his reality; a dingy basement with a decrepit bounty hunter glaring at him. Cole turned his face away and cringed; he could feel the bruised skin from a crack to his jaw the bounty hunter had delivered hours before. He could sense the hunter’s enjoyment and was glad Alice was not there in his place. He was sure that time was running out, and if he did not come up with something, he would be dead in a matter of hours. The worst of it was knowing he would be leaving Alice to feel an eternal emptiness that was unbearable. Even worse for him was knowing that he may never touch her skin again.
“Memory Lane?” the bounty hunter spat.
“Everything you could never be or know,” Cole said in a monotone.
“I don’t have feelings either, half-breed.”
It was meant as an insult, but to Cole, it seemed like a life not worth living. The thought occurred to him to completely shut down emotionally and sever the connection with Alice before he died, in hopes that she wouldn’t feel his actual death. He might be able to turn himself into nothing more than a statue of human flesh. He wasn’t sure if he could do it, but he knew the torture ahead; he might not be able to block her out indefinitely.
“Dreaming again?” Purah hissed.
“Making peace,” Cole answered.
“Peace. Why don’t you pray while you’re at it?” He turned to the bounty hunter keeping guard. “Make it last as long as you can; I want her to feel every scrape.”
Cole lunged at them both, but his shackles kept him at bay. He didn’t have time and all he could think was, may God have mercy on our souls. He wasn’t sure where the thought came from, but it felt cruel. He assumed they would start off lightly to keep him awake and alive as long as possible, in hopes the trade might come to pass. Without another thought, he felt what he could only describe as a metal-tipped whip, lash across his back.
Alice screamed as loud as a runaway train, clutching the bed beneath her. It was only for a split second, but she felt the intense lashing Cole had received just before blocking her again. The Fallen rushed her door and all she could do was cover her mouth in protest that it didn’t happen. That she didn’t just feel what Cole was enduring. Jake ran to her and scooped her up into his large strong arms and she fell into him. He consoled her, against the others’ wishes; their relationship bothered everyone. “It felt like I was being whipped by some sort of metal and leather whip. It was awful,” she cried.
“They’ve begun to torture him. That, at least, means they have decided not to kill him; it buys us time,” Kokabiel said with saddened eyes.
“I need to make the trade,” Alice cried, knowing regardless of any vote, they had no intention of letting her go.
“I promise you if we do not come up with another way, you may go,” Paul said with hands on each of her shoulders.
She could feel his honesty, his love for her. “So what do we do?” she asked.
“I have an idea, but none of you are going to like it,” Jake said, scratching the back of his head.
“Let’s hear it,” Alice said eagerly, as she caught the attention of his eyes. He promised her he would help her save Cole no matter the circumstances, and by the look in his eyes, she knew he didn’t think this plan would succeed.
“We let her make the trade and put a tracker on her, so we can locate her and get her back out of there. We can rally all the Fallen on our side to help.”
“That’s the same as accepting the deal, Procel!” Sariel yelled.
Jake launched across the room, grabbing Sariel by the throat, lifting him off of the ground, “Do not ever call me that name again!”
Alice watched as the Fallen tussled in her room and down towards the kitchen, some throwing swings while the others attempted to pull them off of one another. She was helpless to stop this ridiculous fight; it was only a name after all. She knew she had an emotional tie to each Fallen in this room, and as the last breakable item in her kitchen shattered at her feet, she knew exactly what to do. She did not take a deep breath and still the room, or attempt to float feathers. That would be the same as bringing a knife to a gun fight, useless and stupid. She stared at her father, searching for the connection she had felt with him earlier, and as soon as the connection was made, she used his connection with the Fallen and tethered them together while they fought before her, oblivious. Finally, as the last link was complete, she tore the wall she placed up to block all of their own emotional turmoil, and her own, and shared it with them all. Fallen screams echoed as they crashed to the floor, some unable to breathe, while others were unable to see clearly.
“What the fuck was that?” Jake yelled over an invisible ringing in his ears.
“That was what I felt earlier, times twenty,” Paul answered.
They all turned and stared at Alice, shocked, concerned and impressed. She looked around her house and glared at the men before her. “When I get back from saving Cole this had better be cleaned up,” she demanded. With that, everyone broke out into uncontrollable laughter. Through short chuckles she managed to glare and tell them she was serious, but that only made their laughter grow louder. Finally Sariel gathered the strength to return to business.
“Alright, at least we know she isn’t going in unprotected.”
“I just hope this will be enough to get them both out safely,” Kokabiel said.
“It has to be,” Paul and Alice said simultaneously.
It felt strange to her, the aftermath of such a bond with each of her Fallen family members. Sariel was so calm, and inside he was the same; he was at peace with his choices regardless of how the future turned out. She looked to Kokabiel, the brightest of them all. If they had souls, she was sure she would be able to see his glow from miles away. His love for his son, the woman he lost, his Fallen family, Alice, and all of mankind was grouped together in one warm, intense light that soothed her, even in the darkest corners of the soul she didn’t know she had. Earlier, trying to sense her father had been difficult, similar to running her fingers along a cold stone wall. Now that wall was woven of soft vines, protecting his love from intruders and ready to return to the wall of slate at any moment. Something was different though, welcoming, as if he knew she was there and was opening everything up to her, and by the look in his eyes and a nod of his head, she knew it was true. She released the soft caress against the love she felt, and turned to Jake. With barely any effort, she could feel his darkness swarming him, protectively. There was a single warm pink light as if it were his heart beating; it welcomed her and her alone. Everything else was filled with darkness from the years of torment, lies, deceit, betrayal, and hopelessness. She had known Jake was broken, but nothing could measure his darkness, not her human heart or any other. She was his only grasp on the good still inside of him, the only thing pulling him away from the darkness. She whispered to that warmth that all would be okay, and she would save him. Jake looked up at her with glossy eyes; he was embarrassed, and more so, he was ashamed. Alice walked over and put a hand on his face.
“No one understands you like I do, Jake. I will not break that trust and I will not break my promise.” She kissed his lips softly as if no one else was there. The room filled with angst, but Jake did not move. They were connected and maybe always had been. This was nothing more than a meaningful handshake to them, except it wasn’t. He did not kiss back; he did not breathe. He only stared into Alice’s eyes and truly saw her human soul for the first time. It was a completely different experience when someone saw her soul or felt its presence brush against theirs. She had no idea how she did it, only that she could and only if it chose to
. She pulled away and sat on the floor in front of him. “I can feel you all, feel things I shouldn’t feel or know. I think I am forever connected to you now. Not the same as with Cole but connected.”
“Cole will not be happy about this,” Kokabiel spat. It was unusual for him to be angry about anything.
Guided by instinct, Alice jumped to her feet and pushed Kokabiel into a wall. “We are wasting time, but I am going to do this one more time so you can understand that my feelings for Jake are not the same as they are for Cole.”
“I understand you are trying to figure this out but kissing…”
Alice placed her hand over Kokabiel’s mouth and stared into his eyes. She looked through them, climbing through centuries of chaos. She wasn’t sure what she was looking for, but she knew her soul would know the second she found it, and there it was. Moments after Cole’s birth, Kokabiel sat with his son and the woman he loved, telling her the hardest truth he’d ever known. “I love you, both of you. Why would you think that could ever change?” she asked. Alice’s empathy shook her as she watched Cole’s first moments in this world. She hadn’t expected the emotional impact to be so strong, but it was easy to connect when she was so deeply connected to them all. She felt Kokabiel look through her and into her soul as it beamed back at him.
“It’s…” Kokabiel questioned himself.
“Beautiful,” Jake answered.
She stared at the amazing Fallen who was star struck by her, and smiled. Suddenly, it felt as if God had truly given her an advantage by allowing Nephilim to have a soul. Maybe she wasn’t the one who was going to save all Fallen and all of mankind. Perhaps it was her soul. She slowly sat onto a chair, feeling rather sluggish. Apparently this new gift was exhausting her, physically and emotionally. She could still see Cole’s birth as if she was there; she could feel their emotions, even baby Cole’s. She could feel all the memories she had clung to. Her empathy, her supposed curse, was going to save Cole and all the rest of them. She knew it had to be true. She was slightly worried though, when in that moment she could feel and sense everything. She wondered, when grasping onto Purah, if all his agony and cruelty would destroy her.
Alice's Sacrifice (Alice Clark Series) Page 12
