Lottie Biggs is (Not) Desperate

Home > Other > Lottie Biggs is (Not) Desperate > Page 17
Lottie Biggs is (Not) Desperate Page 17

by Hayley Long


  10 This is officially what is wrong with me. Doctor Edwards who works at the hospital said so. Sometimes I think it would be easier to tell people I had fleas. Or flatulence.

  11 Which is quite odd really because Vogue Marché is neither fashionable nor actually a market.

  12 It wasn’t my fault. He was talking about the periodic table.

  13 It’s NOT a principality – it’s a PROPER country. Ask anyone who lives here.

  14 The Gorgon Sisters were these weird Greek women who had snakes on their heads instead of hair and were so ugly that any man who looked at them turned instantly to stone. To be strictly fair, Samantha Morgan isn’t actually quite as bad as that.

  15 Actually, I have borrowed these lines from Oscar Wilde. I am up to page nineteen of his book now. I have another hundred and sixty-nine pages to go.

  16 This is totally and utterly a palindrome.

  17 I can’t decide whether this is a sign of our total compatibility or of an absolute love disaster.

  18 Well, a bit. Sometimes. When she’s asleep. Or in Aberystwyth.

  19 This is a quick approximation of what my avant-garde portrait looked like. The original piece of artwork is probably in a landfill site by now.

  20 Except for the bit about Gareth in his pants.

  21 This is my FAVOURITE word ever. It means disturbing. Goose likes this word as well but only because she copied me.

  22 On reflection, I now think I was wrong.

  23 Beth sy’n cwcan yn dy bopty poeth gwyllt, cariad?

  24 Except for Lee Fogel.

  25 I had to write a story which began with the words: Billy was so pleased that he had opened a new bank account. It wasn’t easy to make anything interesting out of that beginning, but I think all the stuff about Billy being a brain-eating zombie gave my story added depth.

  26 Probably.

  27 This means ‘Not much!’ in Welsh. I’m not going to explain all over again what my question meant because I’ve already explained it in footnote 23.

  Or

  three weeks IN the GrIP

  Of a wOmaNLY urGe

  First published 2010 by Macmillan Children’s Books

  This electronic edition published 2010 by Macmillan Children’s Books

  a division of Macmillan Publishers Limited

  Pan Macmillan, 20 New Wharf Road, London N1 9RR

  Basingstoke and Oxford

  Associated companies throughout the world

  www.panmacmillan.com

  ISBN 978-0-330-52535-0 PDF

  ISBN 978-0-330-52534-3 EPUB

  Text and illustrations copyright © Hayley Long 2010

  The right of Hayley Long to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

  The Macmillan Group has no responsibility for the information provided by any author websites whose address you obtain from this e-book (‘author websites’). The inclusion of the author website addresses in this e-book does not constitute an endorsement by or association with us of such sites or the content, products, advertising or other materials presented on such sites.

  You may not copy, store, distribute, transmit, reproduce or otherwise make available this publication (or any part of it) in any form, or by any means (electronic, digital, optical, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise), without the prior written permission of the publisher. Any person who does any unauthorized act in relation to this publication may be liable to criminal prosecution and civil claims for damages.

  A CIP catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

  Visit www.panmacmillan.com to read more about all our books and to buy them. You will also find features, author interviews and news of any author events, and you can sign up for e-newsletters so that you’re always first to hear about our new releases.

 

 

 


‹ Prev