“Tell her...” His throat felt thick.
“Yes?”
“Tell her thank-you.” He set his hat back on his head and hurried down the walkway.
Maggie tugged at her mother’s sleeve. “Where’s Laredo going?”
“I don’t know, sweetheart. Laredo!” Caroline called to him.
He looked back.
“How’d you manage to pay for the repairs to your truck?”
He stood silent, refusing to answer her.
It didn’t take Caroline long to figure it out. “Grady. He lent you the money, didn’t he?” She leaped down the porch steps and planted her hands on her hips. “That son of a—” She bit off the last word.
Laredo climbed into his truck and started the engine, desperate to leave before he found an excuse to stay.
Ten
“What do you mean Laredo’s gone?” Savannah didn’t understand what Caroline was telling her. He’d been on the ranch earlier that day; she’d seen him herself. They’d both made an effort in the past week to pretend their discussion had never taken place. But it had, and her declaration of love stood between them. It was something they could neither forget nor ignore.
Every time Savannah thought about the foolish way she’d exposed her heart, she grew weary with self-recriminations and regret. Her rash behavior had embarrassed them both, yet she realized she probably couldn’t have kept silent any longer. She loved Laredo, and hiding her feelings had become increasingly more difficult.
“He asked me to give you this,” Caroline said with a regretful sigh, handing her a rectangular box.
“It’s really pretty!” Maggie added enthusiastically.
“You’ve talked to him?” Savannah said. The pain was immediate. Laredo had left, and instead of coming to her, he’d gone to Caroline. He’d talked to Caroline, but not to her. He’d left without even a goodbye.
“He was on his way out of town when he stopped by and asked if I’d give you this.”
Savannah felt an overwhelming need to sit down. Slowly sinking onto a kitchen chair, she brought her fingers to her mouth to suppress a cry. Laredo isn’t coming back.
“Do you want me to open the box for you, Savannah?” Maggie volunteered, eagerly lifting a corner of the box as she spoke. “It’s so pretty and you’re going to like it. Mommy did and so did I.”
Caroline restrained her daughter by placing her hand on Maggie’s shoulder. “Let Savannah open it when she’s ready, okay, sweetheart?”
The child looked disappointed, but she nodded.
Savannah slid her fingers over the top of the box, but lacked the courage to look inside. All her strength went into holding back the tears that burned her eyes.
Laredo was gone. Without a word of farewell, without a note. Nothing. The pain of his leaving had devastated her. But in some odd inexplicable way she understood why he’d left so abruptly.
Laredo Smith couldn’t say goodbye. He loved her too much to hurt her more. Loved her too much to refuse if she’d asked him to stay. And so he’d done the only thing he could. He’d slipped away like a thief in the night; he’d stolen her heart and taken it with him.
“Savannah, are you all right?”
She nodded even as she felt swallowed up in the emptiness.
Caroline’s fingers gripped hers tightly. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
Somehow Savannah managed to look at her friend. She could lie and offer reassurances, but she hadn’t the strength to maintain a facade. It would be easy enough to fool Grady and Richard, but not Caroline.
“It’s a shawl,” Maggie blurted, unable to hold back any longer. “A pretty white one with gold—”
“Maggie,” Caroline snapped.
The little girl lowered her head and bit her lip.
“A shawl... How nice,” Savannah said, struggling. Knowing Maggie was impatient for her to open the gift, she pulled off the lid. The child was right; the shawl was quite possibly the loveliest one she’d ever seen. Lifting it from the tissue paper, she let the delicate fabric slide across her fingers. “Was there...did he give you any message for me?”
Caroline hesitated, then said gently, “He wanted me to thank you.”
Her heart was breaking, the pain raw and real, and yet—despite the emotional intensity of the moment—Savannah smiled.
“Thank you.” She repeated his message. This, too, she understood. The simple words held a wealth of meaning and in some ways were more valuable to her than the gift he’d asked Caroline to deliver.
Despite his desertion, Laredo had thanked her for loving him. Even though he’d walked out of her life with the same suddenness with which he’d entered it, he’d wanted Savannah to know her love had touched him. He couldn’t say it himself, so he let someone else say it for him.
Caroline’s eyes flashed with anger. “I don’t understand why he’d do such a thing! He admitted he loved you—he said as much.”
“I know.”
“But when I asked why he was leaving, all he’d say was that sometimes love wasn’t enough—whatever the hell that means.” Caroline sat down, then got to her feet again and started pacing.
Savannah didn’t try to explain. What Laredo apparently didn’t grasp, and what she’d been unable to make him believe, was that his love was the one thing she’d ever need.
He seemed to think a prosperous ranch would make her happy, or a million head of cattle. A luxurious ranch house. A rose garden. Those things gave her security and contentment, true. But Laredo’s love gave her happiness, and it gave meaning to everything else in her life. She’d tried to convince him that she’d happily work at his side, that their love would allow them to create a new security and contentment of their own. Why couldn’t he believe her?
“Can I go sit on the swing outside?” Maggie asked.
Caroline nodded. “Stay on the porch.”
Maggie assured Caroline she would, and the screen door slammed behind her. Caroline brewed Savannah a cup of strong coffee, then brought it over to the table. “Drink this,” she ordered. “You look pale as a sheet.”
Savannah raised the cup to her lips. Surprisingly the coffee revived her.
Caroline poured herself a cup and sat down next to Savannah. “I know you probably don’t want to hear this at the moment, but I’m going to say it, anyway.” She paused long enough to inhale deeply. “Right now, you’re hurting too much to believe that everything happens for a reason. I don’t know why, but that’s the way it seems to work.
“When I discovered I was pregnant with Maggie, I felt as if the world had caved in on me. I was young and stupid and determined not to let a mistake ruin my life. First I thought the father would marry me, but...well, that was impossible. I’d already decided I wanted to have this baby, so I was left to deal with the pregnancy alone.”
In all the years they’d been friends, this was the first time Caroline had discussed anything to do with Maggie’s birth. Or Maggie’s father.
“When I couldn’t hide that I was pregnant any longer, I had to tell my mother. I expected her to be furious, to call me all the names I’d called myself. Instead, Mom asked me a few questions and then held me. We both cried.
“It was what I’d needed most—her love. She talked about how difficult it must have been for me to keep this pain bottled up inside me all those weeks. I didn’t want to tell her about Maggie’s father, but I did, and how stupid I’d been to think he actually loved me...” Her voice wavered and it was a moment before she could continue. “You see, Savannah,” she whispered with emotion shining in her eyes, “this mistake was really a gift. I made a mistake, but Maggie’s not a mistake. She’s my heart and my joy. I can’t imagine life without her.”
The screen door opened just then, and Maggie flew into the room and raced across the kitchen. Breathl
ess, she wrapped her arms around Caroline’s leg, hiding her face against her mother’s jeans.
Grady followed her inside, looking frustrated and confused.
“What’d you do this time?” Caroline demanded.
“Not a damn thing,” Grady said. “I saw Maggie outside and thought it was time the two of us talked, but it seems she’s not ready.”
Maggie clung to her mother’s leg all the harder.
“It’d help if you hadn’t yelled at her on the phone,” Caroline suggested calmly.
“How was I supposed to know it was Maggie?” he shouted in return.
“He’s yelling again,” Maggie surfaced long enough to announce.
“Explain to her that it was all a mistake, would you?” Grady said in a strained voice, gesturing at Maggie. “She’s right, I was a beast. But I’m willing to be a prince, too, if she’ll give me the chance.”
“You’re too mean to be a prince,” Maggie said next. Breaking away from her mother, she climbed into Savannah’s lap and locked both arms around her neck. “I don’t like Grady ’cause he yells.”
“He’s not one of my favorite people, either,” Caroline said, glaring at Savannah’s brother.
“What’d I do now?” he groaned. “Damn, but it’s hard to understand women. I haven’t talked to you in days—what could I possibly have done to offend you?”
“You know very well what you’ve done.”
Clearly perplexed, he shrugged. “I’m afraid you’re going to have to tell me, because I haven’t got a clue.”
“You’re lower than a...a worm,” Caroline said.
“So what else is new?” Grady sounded bored.
“Caroline?” Savannah said her friend’s name softly, confused by the display of anger. “What did Grady do?”
Still glaring at him, Caroline crossed her long legs. Her foot swung with a furious rhythm. “I wasn’t going to tell you,” Caroline said, speaking to Savannah, “but you’ll figure it out soon enough. Grady gave Laredo the money so he could pay off the repairs on his truck.”
Savannah felt as if she’d been punched, as if the air had been forced from her lungs. She looked at her brother in shock and pain and disbelief. The abruptness of Laredo’s leaving was almost more than she could bear, but knowing that her own brother, her own flesh and blood, had made it possible—had no doubt encouraged it—was like a knife in the back. She gasped. “Grady?”
“I didn’t give him the money,” Grady said, and his gaze darted between her and Caroline as if he didn’t understand what he’d done that was so wrong. “I lent him the money.”
He’d betrayed her.
There was nothing more to say.
Barely aware of what she was doing, Savannah stood and slowly placed one foot in front of the other. Hardly knowing how she’d managed it, she climbed the stairs to her room, dragging herself one step at a time.
“What’d I do that was so terrible?” her brother shouted after her. “Tell me, Savannah! I want to know!”
“Leave her alone,” Caroline said angrily, her voice drifting toward Savannah as she climbed the stairs. “If you can’t figure it out, trust me, I’ll be happy to fill in the blanks. And you know what? I’ll use small words so you’ll be sure to understand.”
***
Grady delayed speaking to Caroline about Laredo for ten days. He knew he needed to say something—to explain, to talk about Savannah, to ask her advice. He saw her enter the Winn-Dixie one evening and followed her inside. He didn’t want Caroline to assume he’d sought her out; he intended her to believe their meeting was accidental.
Taking a cart and maintaining a safe distance behind her, he trailed her into the produce section. Savannah was the one who did all the grocery shopping, and other than picking up a necessary item now and again, he was rarely in the supermarket.
He paused in front of a pyramid display of bright juicy-looking oranges, and with one eye on Caroline and the other on the task at hand, he reached for an orange. To his horror, the entire display collapsed.
Grady saw it happen as if in slow motion. He attempted to catch as many as possible before they tumbled to the floor, his arms moving frantically in every which direction. In the end he abandoned the effort, kneeling on the linoleum floor surrounded by fruit.
Everyone in the produce department stopped and stared at him. Even small children pointed and snickered. Grady smiled weakly and searched for a witty remark, but like everything else these past few weeks, his wit failed him.
He was about to turn tail and run when Caroline squatted down beside him. “This is another fine mess you’ve created, Grady Weston.”
He didn’t need Caroline to tell him that. If he wanted to make a fool of himself, he wouldn’t choose to do it in front of half the store. Nope, he preferred to manage that with just one or two onlookers. Like Caroline. And his sister.
Together they gathered the spilled oranges and set them back on the display case. “Is there a reason you followed me in here?” she asked bluntly.
“Was I that obvious?”
“Don’t apply to the Secret Service, all right?”
Since it was entirely obvious that running into her hadn’t been an accident, he got straight to the point.
“Do you have time for coffee?” he asked, and then because he was afraid she might think he was asking her out, he added, “I’m worried about Savannah. I’d feel better if I talked about this with someone.”
She checked her watch, and Grady had the feeling time wasn’t her major concern. “Talked about this with just anyone?” she asked.
“With you,” he amended, burying his pride. He owed Caroline this much.
“Let me phone the day care,” she said, “and then I’ll meet you at the bowling alley.”
“Okay. See you there in a few minutes.” He was eager to make his escape before he toppled a display of something really embarrassing—like feminine hygiene products.
The café in the bowling alley served some of the best food in town. It was certainly the most reasonably priced, with coffee only a quarter a cup. They served decent coffee, too. There was always a special; according to the reader board outside, today’s was T-bone steak and a baked potato. And the place stayed open all night on weekends. In Grady’s opinion, it was a damn good deal. Although he wasn’t interested in a steak at the moment.... Even if he’d been hungry, he couldn’t have choked it down.
Arriving first, he found an empty booth and turned over two mugs. The waitress brought him a couple of menus and smiled. “Haven’t seen you in a while, Grady.”
“Hello, Denise. How’re Art and the kids?” Grady had attended high school with Denise a hundred years ago. While he was out chasing cattle, his classmate had married, had three kids and started working here part-time.
“I can’t complain. Billy’s in junior high this year.”
Hard to believe, Grady thought. Art and Denise’s oldest boy was reaching his teens and he wasn’t even married yet.
Denise filled his mug with coffee. “Are you going to order something to eat?”
“Not me, but Caroline might.”
“Caroline Daniels?” Denise filled the second mug.
He nodded, disliking the flicker of interest in her eyes.
“Are you two seeing each other now?” she asked, her interest far too avid.
Grady opened his mouth to deny everything. He didn’t have to.
“No way,” Caroline answered for him as she slipped into the booth. She handed Denise the menu, effectively dismissing her, and reached for the sugar dispenser. “You had something you wanted to say about Savannah.”
“Yeah.” This was more difficult than he’d imagined.
“Is she all right?” Caroline leaned back against the patched red vinyl upholstery, and he noted for t
he first time how pale she was. He didn’t comment because sure as hell she’d make something of it—something he’d never intended. His only chance to have a peaceful conversation was to stick to the matter at hand and ignore everything else. Still, he wondered.
“How come you haven’t been out to the ranch?” he blurted. His sister needed a friend, and he’d expected Caroline to be there for her, especially now.
“I stopped by a couple of times when you weren’t around.”
“On purpose?” he asked, thinking she’d taken to avoiding him because of Maggie.
“No, it just happened to work out that way. I haven’t gone anywhere in a couple of days. I’ve been dealing with postal inspectors all week. I had my own crisis to handle, but fortunately that’s behind me now.” She cradled the mug between her hands. “I’ve phoned Savannah every day.” Her eyes held his. “Is something going on with her that I don’t know about?”
“Not with Savannah, exactly,” he said, then looked away, finding her scrutiny uncomfortable. “First off, I was wrong about Laredo Smith.”
That captured her attention, he could tell. She raised her eyebrows but said nothing. Not yet, anyway. Naturally she’d delight in hearing how wrong he’d been.
“I should have accepted Savannah’s assessment of his character,” Grady said, embarrassed that he’d allowed his fears to get in the way. Admitting he’d made a mistake had never come easy. “I...came to some, well, erroneous conclusions about Smith. The result was that he and I got started on the wrong foot.”
“You should tell Savannah this, not me.”
“I have!” he snapped, then took a deep breath in an effort to control his impatience. When he spoke again, he lowered his voice. “I did tell her, but I wanted you to know, as well.”
“Should I be grateful?”
Grady decided to ignore the sarcasm. “Laredo came to me and asked for a loan. Despite what you think, I’m not blind. I knew something wasn’t right. I didn’t want him to leave and I told him so.”
This appeared to surprise Caroline. Her eyebrows rose again. “You did?”
Heart of Texas Series Volume 1: Lonesome CowboyTexas Two-StepCaroline's Child Page 17
