by Lucy King
‘We do. Because you have no idea of how so sorry I am about the way our affair ended.’
She shrugged as if she’d forgotten all about it and ignored the knives making mincemeat of her heart. ‘Don’t be. Really, it’s nothing. I’ve moved on.’ She waved at the man she’d been sitting next to in the church and shot him a bright smile.
Will frowned as he looked in the direction she was waving in and went still. ‘Have you?’
‘Oh, yes, absolutely,’ she said, nodding and smiling like a lunatic.
She swung her gaze back to him and saw that he’d gone a little pale. ‘And have you found what you’re looking for?’
‘I’m getting there,’ she said breezily, reminding herself it didn’t matter what colour he went.
He shoved his hands in his pockets, the muscle in his jaw hammering as his eyes blazed into hers. ‘So I don’t suppose there’s any point in asking you to marry me.’
‘Absolutely none whatso—’ Bella stopped. Blinked. The blood roared in her ears and for a moment she thought she might be about to pass out. God, how many glasses of champagne had she had? ‘What?’ she croaked.
Will took her arm and Bella let herself be pulled behind an enormous flower arrangement, too stunned to resist. ‘I said, I don’t suppose there’s any point in asking you to marry me.’
She jerked her gaze to his and scoured his expression, but found nothing to indicate that he was anything other than completely serious. ‘That’s what I thought you said.’
The pulse at the base of his neck was hammering. ‘Good. So what do you think?’
What did she think? What did she think? Bella blinked and thought that she didn’t have a clue what she thought about anything any more. Because shouldn’t she be ecstatic? Shouldn’t she be leaping around with joy and delight and happiness? She was being offered everything she’d ever wanted by the man she loved to distraction.
So why wasn’t she jumping into his arms and smothering him in kisses? Why couldn’t she forget the way they’d parted? The flat bleak way he’d looked at her as he told her he’d never let himself love her? Or the fact that he must have known what he was doing to her but had carried on regardless?
Did he really expect her to forget the way he’d hurt her and simply tumble gratefully into his arms as if he was the answer to all her prayers? If he thought that he could think again.
Will watched the emotions play across Bella’s face, his heart racing and a bead of sweat trickling down his spine. This wasn’t going the way he’d imagined. He hadn’t had the time to think it through in great depth, but he’d rather assumed that he’d propose and she’d fling herself into his arms, smile up at him as she pressed herself up close and say yes in that gorgeous breathy way she had. And then they’d go and set about making each other deliriously happy for the rest of their lives.
So what was she doing standing there stock still with a frown creasing her forehead and a wary look in her eye?
‘But you don’t want to marry anyone,’ she said carefully and something in his stomach curdled. ‘You don’t do commitment. You have issues.’
Will went cold at the flat tone of her voice. ‘I know. But I’m working on them.’
‘You said you’d never take the risk on us. You said you couldn’t.’
‘I know,’ he muttered again, the panic flooding back as it dawned on him that he was staggering around on unknown territory in the dark without a torch.
‘Do you have any idea how much that hurt?’
Her eyes flashed with pain, the pain that he’d caused. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said, his throat as rough and dry as sandpaper. ‘I’d do anything to be able to go back and fix things.’
She tilted her head and shrugged as if she couldn’t care less. ‘So what’s changed?’ she asked, arching an eyebrow and shooting him a cool glance, and for the first time in his life Will knew what real fear felt like.
It felt like an icy hand clutching his heart. It felt like a gallon of acid swilling around in his stomach. It felt like the bleakness of a lifetime of loneliness, a future that yawned ahead of him empty and cold.
‘I have,’ he said, clearing his throat in an effort to beat back the bone-chilling dread that he’d screwed things up beyond repair.
‘I see.’
And as he looked at her, clearly deliberating over what decision she was going to make, he realised he was going to have to fight as he’d never had to fight before.
‘I’m sorry I reacted like a jerk when you told me you loved me,’ he said, nearly passing out with the force with which everything he wanted to say slammed into his head. ‘I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you I loved you. I didn’t think I deserved it. I never allowed myself to wish for it. I didn’t think I could have it.’
Bella blinked. ‘You could have had everything,’ she said simply, and his heart wrenched. ‘And you rejected it. Deliberately.’
‘I was terrified.’
Her eyes widened. ‘Terrified?’
Will raked his hands through his hair and dragged in a deep ragged breath. ‘My feelings for you scared the hell out of me. They still do a bit, to be honest.’
Bella frowned. ‘And what feelings would those be?’ she said cautiously.
‘I have so many I barely know where to start.’
‘Well, I’m not going anywhere,’ she said, her frown disappearing as she flashed him the ghost of a smile. A smile that, however faint, warmed his soul and gave him more encouragement than he could have hoped for.
Will swallowed and felt a tremor run through him. ‘I am utterly in awe of you, Bella. The way you don’t let the past dictate your future. The way you’ve always chosen the path you want to take. The way you face your demons head-on and don’t hide behind anything. You are the bravest, most incredible woman I’ve ever met.’
A light flickered in the depths of her eyes and his heart began to thunder. ‘Really?’
He nodded. ‘Really. You are also beautiful and clever and kind and talented and-’
Her smile deepened. ‘Don’t forget my wicked way with a pair of handcuffs.’
‘As if I could ever forget that.’ He gazed at her. ‘I love you, Bella. I love you more than I ever thought possible and I just want to do everything in my power to make you happy. To make your dreams come true.’ He paused. Felt his heart quake a little. ‘If you’ll let me, that is.’
As if she’d ever really had any choice, thought Bella, her whole body shaking with happiness as she looked up at the earnest expression on his face and the promise blazing in his eyes. She’d been utterly lost the minute he’d admitted to being terrified. Ah, who was she kidding? She’d been lost the minute she’d laid eyes on him.
‘That was quite a speech,’ she said, feeling an unstoppable smile spread across her face.
Will frowned. ‘Yes, well, I’ve no doubt it could have been better but I didn’t have much of a chance to practise.’
‘You didn’t need to,’ she said, closing the distance between them and winding her arms around his neck. ‘It was perfect.’
Letting out a deep breath, and with it all the tension that had been gripping his body, Will folded his arms around her and clasped her against him as if he never wanted to let her go. ‘You can’t imagine how delighted I am you think so.’ His eyes blazed into hers and Bella trembled. ‘So will you? Let me try and give you everything you want, I mean.’
‘I think I probably should.’ She lifted her eyebrows and grinned up at him. ‘After all, it sounds like you could learn a lot from me.’
‘I could.’
And then he lowered his head and captured her mouth with his and kissed her with the passion of everything he’d just said. He kissed her until she was melting with desire and happiness and love.
‘Not to mention the fact that I love you too,’ she murmured against his mouth.
He bent back a little and smiled. ‘Despite my many failings?’
‘And because of them.’ She grinned. ‘And I’m not exa
ctly without fault, you know.’
‘You are to me.’
She traced the creases at his eyes with her fingertips and felt him shake. ‘You look like hell.’
‘The last couple of weeks haven’t exactly been my finest.’
‘Nor mine.’
‘You look amazing. You smell amazing.’ He rested his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. ‘God, I’m sorry I was such an idiot. And for so long.’
‘That’s OK. You can spend the rest of your life making it up to me.’
‘I intend to.’ Then he released her, dug in his pocket and drew out a small velvet box and handed it to her. ‘This is for you.’
Bella took the box with shaking fingers, her heart squeezing and her throat tightening.
‘Actually, maybe you shouldn’t open it now,’ he said, his voice sounding a little shaky. ‘Maybe you should open it later. Maybe doing this kind of thing at someone else’s wedding isn’t really all that appropriate.’
‘Nervous, Will?’ she said with a tiny smile.
‘Petrified. I’ve never bought jewellery before. Plus, you’re a jeweller and that makes the whole thing even more nerve-racking.’
Holding her breath, Bella released the catch and slowly opened the box. And there, nestling in a bed of deep purple velvet, was the most beautiful diamond solitaire ring she’d ever seen.
‘Do you like it?’ he said.
Like it? Her breathing was all over the place and her eyes were stinging, because it was everything she’d ever imagined, everything she’d ever hoped for, and so much more. ‘It’s beautiful. I love it. And I love you.’
‘Then please say you’ll marry me,’ he said softly, taking the box from her and sliding the ring onto her finger.
She stared up at him, saw the love blazing in his eyes and wondered if it was possible to be happier. She gave him a dazzling smile and wrapped her arms around his neck, pressed herself against him and breathed, ‘Well, if you absolutely insist … ‘
*
All the characters in this book have no existence outside the imagination of the author, and have no relation whatsoever to anyone bearing the same name or names. They are not even distantly inspired by any individual known or unknown to the author, and all the incidents are pure invention.
All Rights Reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. This edition is published by arrangement with Harlequin Enterprises II BV/S.à.r.l. The text of this publication or any part thereof may not be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, storage in an information retrieval system, or otherwise, without the written permission of the publisher.
This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the prior consent of the publisher in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.
® and TM are trademarks owned and used by the trademark owner and/or its licensee. Trademarks marked with ® are registered with the United Kingdom Patent Office and/or the Office for Harmonisation in the Internal Market and in other countries.
First published in Great Britain 2012 by Mills & Boon, an imprint of Harlequin (UK) Limited. Harlequin (UK) Limited, Eton House, 18-24 Paradise Road, Richmond, Surrey TW9 1SR
© Lucy King 2012
ISBN: 978-1-408-97338-7
Table of Contents
Cover
Title Page
Praise
About the Author
Also by Lucy King
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Copyright
