by Day Leclaire
“No, Ana. I didn’t.”
She spared Lander a swift, wary glance that had him freezing up again. “Maybe…maybe all this time I had it backward,” she murmured. “Let’s try it from this direction. Did you ever refuse to do business with Lander unless he and I became involved? No, you wouldn’t have done that. You wouldn’t have settled for anything less than—” She broke off, wide-eyed.
“Ana—”
She stumbled backward toward the door. “Oh, no. Tell me you didn’t do that. Tell me that isn’t one of the conditions of your contract.”
Lander took a step in her direction. “Honey—”
She held up a hand. “I’m so stupid. How could I still be so naive after Stewart?” She shook her head, curls frothing around her face. Her complexion had turned as pale as her ensemble, stretched fragile and translucent across her elegant bone structure. Her heart fluttered at the base of her throat like the wings of a wild bird fighting the bars of her cage. “One plus one always equals two. Always. You’d think I’d remember that.”
Joc frowned in confusion, but Lander instantly understood. He wished he could deny the conclusions she’d reached, but how could he when she was all too right? He’d never before seen such a look of devastation on a woman’s face. The fact that that woman was his wife nearly destroyed him.
“Am I actually written into the contract, Joc?” she asked with amazing composure. “Section C, Subparagraph Four, Line Sixteen. In exchange for my basing X, Y and Z business in Verdonia you will marry my sister. If I read those contracts on the table over there, will I find my name in them?” When neither man twitched so much as a muscle, she swept relentlessly onward. “No? Not there? Then you must have decided my future over brandy and cigars. I’m a gentleman’s handshake, aren’t I? Marry my sister and I’ll do this contract with you.”
“Sweetheart, don’t—”
Her composure shattered, her breath escaping in a sob. “Oh, God. You don’t have to say another word. I get it. I do. My marriage is nothing more than a business deal.” Her laugh was a painful splinter of sound. “Do I have all the details right? Have I missed anything?”
“Listen to me, Juliana,” Lander began.
But she had no intention of listening. Before he’d even gotten the words out, she’d turned and made a beeline for the door. Flinging it open, she darted into the corridor. She heard Lander giving chase behind her. He caught up with her just as she burst into their bedroom suite.
Slamming the door closed behind them, he snagged her arm and spun her around. “Listen to me, damn it!”
“Listen to what?” She could hear the fury in her own voice and fought to modulate it, fought for a measure of restraint. Once upon a time, she might have succeeded. But this hurt went too deep to keep inside, the pain too raw to bottle up. “Whatever you have to say to me will either be a lie or an excuse. Which one were you planning on using?”
“Neither. I was planning on giving you the truth…and an explanation.”
She cut him off with a swipe of her hand. “You don’t need to explain. You did that weeks ago. I just wasn’t paying close enough attention.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” He forked his fingers through his hair, the lion rumpling his mane. “What did I explain to you? Where? When?”
Her breath came far too quickly, her thoughts racing too fast for coherency. “We were in my office. Don’t you remember? You were trying to convince me to continue our relationship after our one-night stand. And when I told you it wouldn’t be in Verdonia’s best interest, you said—” Her eyes fluttered closed as she strove to calm down enough to recollect his exact words. “You said your personal life has never interfered with your duty to your country, that duty takes primary importance over everything. Always.”
Oh, God, why hadn’t she listened? Why hadn’t she understood? She’d been so caught up in the dream, in the fairy tale, that she’d forgotten what reality was all about. Well, she remembered now. It had come crashing down on her with a vengeance, destroying her from the inside out. “But I get it now, Lander. Marrying me meant that Verdonia would be protected from economic ruin. You didn’t marry me because you loved me. You married me to protect Verdonia.”
“You’re right. You’re absolutely right.” Desperation had him pacing, and he ate up the length of the room with long, swift strides. “Joc came to me with his proposition. Said he had a sister he wanted me to marry.”
“Me.”
He swiveled to face her. “No, not you. Ana Arnaud.” He closed in on her and she drew inward, flinching away from him. “I told him to go to hell. I told him I might have considered such an outrageous suggestion the week before, but not then. I’d met someone, I told him. Juliana Rose. But the joke was on me, wasn’t it? Because when he showed me a picture of his sister, damned if Juliana Rose and Ana Arnaud weren’t one and the same person. An interesting coincidence, don’t you think?”
Her eyes narrowed. “Coincidence? You say that like you think—” Her breath escaped in a hiss and her control snapped. “You believe I was in on it?” she demanded, livid. “You think I plotted with Joc to force you to the altar?”
“The possibility occurred to me. You show up at the first ball we’d thrown since my father’s death. You’re using your first and middle name, conveniently omitting your last. Your brother arrives the same evening. We spend one unforgettable night together, and all of the sudden Joc is talking contracts and marriage.”
She shook her head in disbelief, too full of anguish to speak, afraid she might break if she tried. If that happened, all her most private emotions would come spilling out in a hysterical flood. Once loosened from her control, she could no more call those emotions back than she could gather up a single raindrop out of a downpour.
Lander started toward her again. “So, yes. I admit it. I considered the possibility that you and Joc were setting me up. And you know what I decided?” He pursued her until he’d backed her against the bed. “I decided, who cares if that’s how it went down? I wanted you. You wanted me. And then there was Verdonia to consider. With the amethyst mines played out, the country’s on the verge of economic collapse. So, hell yes, Princess. I agreed to marry you. What would you have done?”
“I’d have told you the truth,” she argued bitterly. “Given you a choice.”
“Really?” He cocked an eyebrow, his expression skeptical. “Would you have agreed to marry me if I’d been upfront with you?”
She hesitated. Would she have? “I don’t know,” she conceded.
“At least you’re honest about it.” He lifted a shoulder in a weary shrug. “I suspected that might be your answer, and I couldn’t afford to take the chance you might refuse my proposal. When the press found out about us—Joc’s doing, I assume—I took advantage of the situation and had my ring on your finger before you had an opportunity to react.”
“You put your country first, just as you warned you would.”
He wanted to deny it, she could tell. “Yes. And let me be clear about something else, as long as we’re being so damned honest. I’d do it all over again. The situation is too critical for me to leave anything to chance.”
Resolution took hold, hard and implacable. “I can’t live like that. I wish I could, but I can’t.” She looked around the room, seeking an avenue of escape. “I have to leave.”
He reached for her. Fingers and curls seemed to find each other of their own accord, snaring and tangling. Clinging. Joining. “You’re my wife.”
“Bought and paid for.” Her voice broke on the final words. Helpless tears gathered in her eyes. “That makes me property, not a wife. At least not a real one.”
He snatched a kiss, then another. She remained helpless beneath the onslaught, her body softening, responding, betraying her need. “Stay,” he demanded between kisses. “We’ll find a way to work this out.”
The tears fell then. Hopelessness drove them, a despair so deep and pervasive that nothing he said o
r did could make it right again. After Stewart, she’d thrown up a protective wall and hidden behind it, afraid to allow anyone access in case they hurt her again. Lander had pulled down that wall, brick by brick. He’d set those emotions free and she’d allowed it to happen, because she’d wanted—more than anything—to find love.
A coldness slipped through her veins, stealing the warmth his arms provided. She’d believed this man fulfilled her in every way possible, aligned her, balanced her. She’d thought she’d found her soul mate. And instead it had been an illusion. What he’d offered hadn’t been real. What she’d hoped to find with him hadn’t existed. Now all that remained was an empty shell.
She untangled herself from his embrace. He didn’t want to release her any more than she wanted to go. Fingers and curls fought her, resisting, before being forced to part. No matter what it took, no matter how difficult, she had to walk away. She had to run. She wouldn’t survive the pain if she didn’t.
“I’m sorry, Lander. I can’t stay.” Her voice wobbled, not that there was any way to prevent it. “I’m going to ask Joc to take me back to the States while I consider my options. You two can decide how best to settle any outstanding contractual issues.”
She started to remove her wedding rings and earrings, and he stopped her before the rings left her finger. “Keep them,” he ordered.
Her gaze lifted to lock with his, a desperate, searching look. If only he’d say the words, just three simple words that would make all the difference in the world. But either he didn’t know them, or he didn’t feel for her what she felt for him. Time to concede defeat. It was over, the fairy tale ended before it had even begun. Without another word, she turned and left her husband.
Juliana was already on Joc’s plane when her brother arrived. After shooting her a single look of concern, he gave his full attention to the pilot and attendants, issuing instructions in a low voice. He must have asked for privacy because they were immediately left alone in the spacious cabin.
“Ana, I’m so sorry.” He came to sit on the armrest of the seat across the aisle from her. “I screwed up. I know that. But I swear I was acting in your best interests.”
There had never been any question in her mind about that. Her brother had spent most of his life caring for her. Protecting her. Trying to provide everything she could ever want or need. But this…! “Why did you do it, Joc?” The blistering anger from earlier had gone, leaving behind a cold, bottomless fury. “How could forcing Lander to marry me possibly be in my best interests?”
“Because you deserved to be a princess.” Determination filled his voice. “To be a queen, if that’s what the people of Verdonia decide.”
“How dare you!” she snapped. “What made you think I wanted to be a princess, let alone a queen?”
He stilled, taken aback. It had been a long time since anyone had ever questioned the rightness of his decisions, and having his little sister do it clearly left him unsettled. “Do you think I don’t know how hideous the past seventeen years have been?” he tried to explain. “How you’ve suffered at the hands of the media? For a while I thought you’d come to terms with it. Put it behind you. You seemed to love your job.” His expression darkened. “Until Stewart.”
“And because of that you forced Lander to propose to me? To marry me? Was a contractual marriage supposed to protect me somehow? To ensure I live happily ever after?” Her mouth worked. “How could you do that to either Lander or me?”
“Don’t you see? It’s because I love you so much that I want what’s best for you.”
“You can’t order the world and everyone in it to your convenience.”
His jaw took on a stubborn set. “Why not?”
“Joc!”
He waved that aside. “Listen to me, Ana. There’s something I haven’t told you about my relationship with Montgomery. I owe him. That’s why I came to Verdonia. That’s why I agreed to help him.”
Her brows pulled together. “What are you talking about?”
“We had a rather contentious relationship at Harvard.” His mouth twisted. “I guess that would be a generous description considering how much I hated the man.”
“You hated Lander? But, why?”
Joc’s eyes were black with emotion. “You know why. Because he represented everything we weren’t. He had the name, the heritage, the perfect life. He was the golden child. So I went after him to prove who was better. Grades, women, sports. You name it, I had to beat him. And in the end, I did. I graduated just ahead of him.” He grimaced. “The bastard even had the nerve to shake my hand when he congratulated me.”
Juliana shook her head. “I don’t understand. How does that translate into your owing him?”
“His cronies decided that the only way I could have come out ahead of Montgomery was if I cheated. They beat the snot out of me, determined to get me to confess.”
Understanding struck. “Lander rescued you, didn’t he?”
“Yeah. I’ve never seen anything like it. He mowed through every last one of them and then carted me off to the hospital. I swore to him that day that if he ever needed anything, if it was in my power, I’d give it to him.” His gaze fixed on her. “So, you see, he didn’t have to marry you. If he’d refused, he knew damn well I would still have lived up to my part of our agreement. There’s only one reason he went along with my condition. He loves you. You have to believe that.”
“But I’ll never be one hundred percent certain,” she shot back. “If someday he decides he does love me, I’ll never know if it’s what’s actually in his heart or if it’s part of his contract with you. I’ll suspect every word he says. Every gesture he makes. Every gift he gives me. I’ll never know. Not for sure.”
Her brother stared at her in stunned horror. “No. That’s…that’s not right.”
She bowed her head. “None of this is right.” She pushed herself to her feet. She’d never felt so tired before, nor so defeated. “I’m going into the back to lie down. Please ask the attendants not to disturb me.”
He caught her hand and squeezed it. “I’ll watch out for you.”
“You always do.” She couldn’t bring herself to look at him. “The problem is, I’m all grown up now. It’s time I watched out for myself, even if it means falling down on occasion and skinning my knee. It’s time to let go, Joc. You have your own life to live. Now let me live mine.”
She didn’t wait for his response. It didn’t matter what Joc said or did anymore. Her declaration had been as much for her own benefit as it had been for her brother’s. There had been the ring of truth to her words, a message from herself to herself. It was past time she took charge of her life. Long past time.
Ten
Juliana never did recall those first bleak days back in Dallas. They passed in a blur of pain and confusion, as well as a desperate, bone-deep despair. The minute she landed in Texas, she yearned to turn around and fly right back to her husband. But she couldn’t. Not the way things stood between them. By the end of the first week, she knew she had to follow the advice she’d given herself on that last hideous morning in Verdonia. It was time to take charge of her life. There were decisions to make and a resignation to tender to her brother, something she intended to do that very day.
It didn’t take long to drive into the city. Joc owned a full city block worth of office building in the heart of Dallas, a soaring glass and chrome structure that stabbed skyward in a gradually narrowing column. It was simply labeled Arnaud’s. Security waved her through to Joc’s private elevator, and upon exiting she found his personal assistant, Maggie, sitting in her usual spot outside his office.
The older woman looked up from her typing and smiled at Juliana over the top of her reading glasses. “Hey, there, girl. Or should I say, Your Highness?”
“You should not.” Juliana cast a determined glance at the door leading to Joc’s inner sanctum. “Is he around?”
“Can’t you tell from the growls and snarls coming from in there?”
/> “That bad?”
“The worst I’ve seen him in a long time. Maybe you can snap him out of it.”
“I’ll see what I can do.”
“His employees would be most grateful.”
Taking a deep breath, Juliana entered Joc’s office. She found him standing with his back to the door, staring out of the floor-to-ceiling windows at the Dallas skyline. “Damn it, I want some answers,” he snapped as she slipped into the room. Realizing he was on speaker phone, she remained silent.
“You heard me.” Juliana jumped in shock at the sound of her husband’s voice. “I don’t want her back in the country. I don’t care what you have to do, just keep her with you in Dallas. Is that clear?”
“You don’t give me orders, Montgomery.”
“I do about this. I won’t be changing my mind. If she tries to return, I swear I’ll ban her from the damn country.”
She must have made some small sound because Joc spun around. The words he uttered were some of the coarsest she’d ever heard him use. “Would you care to repeat that for your wife’s benefit, Your Highness? She just walked into my office. Judging by her expression, I’d say she overheard every word you said.”
An endless pause followed. Then the man she loved more than life itself replied, “If she heard, there’s no point in my repeating it. I’ll assume my message has been delivered and we can be done with this nonsense.” He made the statement in a flat, emotionless voice, one so unlike his own, if she hadn’t known it was her husband, she’d have thought she was listening to a stranger.
It took her three tries to answer him. “I’ll have my wedding rings messengered to you first thing tomorrow.”
“Don’t bother. I don’t want them back.” And with that, the connection went dead.
Juliana stared blindly at her brother while she fought to breathe. “I…” She tried again. “I just came by to tender my resignation. If you’ll excuse me—”
“Ana, wait.” He started toward her. “There’s something you don’t know.”
