by Alona Jarden
"What can you tell me about Kate's feelings for him?"
"What feelings? He made her coffee. That's about it."
"Do you think she was uncomfortable around him? Did she ever tell you that she was afraid of him, or that she felt he was a nuisance to her?"
"No. Never."
"Did she ever refer to this game you described they played? Did she like it?"
"That she did," he replied casually. "I don’t think she cared about him, except for the silly game of guessing his name. I have no idea why, but she found it amusing for some reason."
For a few more minutes Officer Swenson explained that all directions of the interrogation were being checked. She assured him that there would be legal consequences if he decided to take the law into his own hands and confronted Mr. Andrew Costa on his own. Honestly, I felt as if she said the words directly to me, for the more she inquired about him, the more I wanted to go to that Starbucks and perform some investigation of my own.
A half an hour later, Officer Swenson apologized to me for not getting any more meaningful results in her investigation, asked me to go back to my apartment and promised that I would be the first she would update if there were any new developments.
The way she’d treated me when I was her main suspect probably left her contrite and I took advantage of my new position to the end.
From the moment she realized she had been wrong and I was actually the knight on the white horse who preferred to present himself as the adoptive father of his biological daughter while relinquishing his ego and prestige of the title in the best interest of his daughter, she changed the way she looked at me. Once she realized that I was doing what was right for Kate, without thinking about the consequences or what it would require on my part, she changed her attitude and did everything in her power to share her attempts to find my daughter, making sure to include me as a full participant in the process.
An hour later, I locked the door of my deserted apartment behind me. Although I was no longer the main suspect in my daughter's kidnapping, my feelings remained unsettled. It was the fifth morning since she'd kissed my forehead and left the house, yet she still hadn’t returned. Another agonizing morning began without Kate and I wondered if I would ever get used to her absence from my life.
Chapter 26
Andrew
I decided to leave Kate alone. I didn’t see the need to insist and demand she continue to talk to me, as that evening was packed with so many emotions as it was.
I picked up the items and pictures I had kept intact for years from the floor, placed them back in the shoebox, and gently left them on the living room table, before going into my room and declaring that day as over. My head rested heavily on the pillow and everything that had happened between me and Katarina played back in my mind, like a low-budget film I didn’t appreciate.
I tried to understand what the reason was for her extreme reaction. Was it because I had hurt her with my refusal to the closeness she was seeking or because it was hard for her to digest the memories we’d revealed? Whatever the reason, I was to blame.
I’d destroyed the perfect plan I had spent my whole life planning and there was no choice but to accept that I wouldn’t be able to restore the pleasant atmosphere between us.
At the end of a sleepless night, I found myself waking up to a morning full of worries.
I got up from bed, long before her, got organized for leaving the house, and prepared a quick breakfast for the both of us.
"Kate! It's time to wake up," I called out as I finished setting the table.
"I'm up."
"In that case, it's time to get out of your room."
"What do you want from me, idiot?"
"I want you to grow up and, once you do that, come out of your cave and have breakfast with me."
"I can’t believe it!" She was more beautiful than ever when she opened the door of her room wildly. "You arrogant prick. I'm the one who needs to grow up?"
"Good morning, Kate," I smiled. No, no, I stretched a victorious grin on my face rather than smiling toward her.
"I'm not the one who stomps her feet and demands that everything happen at her pace like a child, Andrew."
"Shall I pour you some coffee?" I gestured at the kettle I’d prepared like a waiter.
"No, thanks. I'll have some whiskey though."
"Game time is over, Kate. Coffee?"
"Whiskey," she insisted.
"I'll have to leave soon, you know? I won’t be here to keep you standing straight if you get drunk now."
"Why does it matter what I say I want to drink, Andrew? You do whatever you want anyway."
"Kate, enough!"
"Fine," she rolled her eyes and sat down at the table. "I'll have some coffee, but you should know that today is my last day here at the cabin with you."
"Are you leaving?" I didn’t buy her act for one second.
"That's right. So I suggest you cancel your shift at the cover-up job you have or, I swear to God, I won’t be here when you return."
"I'm not going to work today."
"You just said you have to leave soon."
"I'm leaving, but not to work. I was called to the police station this morning, so that's where I'm headed."
"You're going where?" I was glad to see she was worried about me.
"This policewoman I met with asked me to come to the station. She said she had some further questions to ask me."
"Did she say what she's going to ask?"
"I assume that her efforts will revolve around her attempt to find out where you are but, other than that, I have no idea."
"You're not really thinking of going there, Andrew, are you?"
"Of course I am. If I refuse, it will immediately increase her suspicions about me."
"Justified suspicions," she widened her eyes at me. "Do you know how ridiculous this is? Don’t you realize that you can’t go and be interrogated about my kidnapping, while I'm here waiting for you to return?"
"But you won’t be here anymore, will you? You said you're going to leave if I leave you alone so..."
"You're not going anywhere, you idiot. You think you're so well thought out, but you're much easier to read than you want to believe."
"My, my, my… Kate, are you worried about me?" I smiled mischievously.
"Worried? About you? Trust me, psycho, I couldn’t care less about you." She shrugged, "I'm worried about me!
I hate to admit it, but it looks like I need you if I want to know the whole truth. I'm worried that you won’t come back and it’s too soon for you to disappear."
"In terms of the process you're going through, right? Or is there another reason why you would rather I didn’t spend the next years behind bars?"
"Um..." She lingered, but her smile revealed her fear of losing what had begun to evolve between us and I let my question remain without a clear answer.
For a good few minutes, she tried to convince me that it wouldn’t be right for me to go to the police station, but failed. She suggested I go to the hospital or fake a car accident, but when she faced my refusal to each of her ridiculous proposals, she realized that I wasn’t going to try and avoid that terrifying policewoman and begged me to give her the missing details before I left the cabin.
"Then write down everything you haven’t told me in a letter. I promise I won’t open it until you come back, okay?"
"Really? You promise? You won’t open it?"
"I swear. I won’t even look at it."
"Not until I return?" I wondered if she really thought I was serious.
"Yes, I swear. Please, Andrew. Put it all in writing, leave it to me and I'll only open the letter if you don’t come back today."
"You're so naive," I sneered. "But you know what? If you agree that from now on I can call you Katarina, I'm willing to put it all in writing."
"What does that have to do with anything, Andrew? Why is the name I grew up with related to exposing my history?"
"Those
are my conditions, Katarina." I pushed my luck as her face turned red with anger, "Do you accept them or not?"
"Fuck you!" She quickly got up, causing the chair she was sitting in to fall behind her. "I’ve changed my mind. You should go! Go to the police station or straight to hell as far as I'm concerned!" She yelled venomously and slammed the door of her room again, but went on complaining from behind it. "I don’t need you, I don’t want you, and I won’t miss you!"
I climbed onto the marble counter in the kitchen, hid the shoebox back behind the wall of cans on top of the cabinet, and left, on my way to the police station.
I didn’t even have the slightest fear of returning to an empty cabin. All I had was a big smile and the certainty that she would be there when I returned.
About an hour later, I gave my name to the registration clerk, who greeted me at the police station, and followed two officers to an interrogation room like one I had seen in countless police television shows.
"We meet again, Mr. Costa."
"I can’t believe our meeting is a surprise. You called me, so I came, Officer Swenson."
"Do you think this is a joke?" she rushed to address my uplifting mood.
"No, no. I'm just excited."
"What are you excited about?"
"I've never been in a real interrogation room," I adopted the character of an excited barista. "Are there cops behind this mirror? Are they watching us right now?" I waved my hand at my reflection with the clear knowledge that I looked like a complete moron.
"Mr. Costa, you're here because part of our investigation into the disappearance of Ms. Kate Briggs has led us directly to you."
"Is that right?" I returned my gaze to her. "Well, that's weird, but I don’t think there will be any problem. I'll do whatever you ask me to do and answer every question you want me to answer. After all, I have nothing to hide."
"That's good to hear." She opened her notebook, "Tell me, please, where do you live?"
"In town. Not too far from where I work." I gave her the address of the cover apartment I held for my Starbucks barista character.
"Are you staying there alone?"
"Yes."
"Are you currently in a romantic relationship with anyone?"
"No," I faked an embarrassed giggle.
"Was Kate ever in your apartment?"
"Kate? The missing girl you're looking for?"
"The kidnapped girl."
"Of course not. Why would she be in my apartment?"
"Why wouldn’t she be? Did she refuse to go to your apartment?"
"I never offered. She's… She's way out of my league and, also, she has a boyfriend, so…"
"Does she, now?"
"Yeah… That guy… I never caught his name, but he used to meet her there every morning. Did you check and see if he maybe knows where she is?"
"Actually, I did. 'That guy' you're referring to, described the way you were looking at Kate as…" She flipped a few pages back in her notebook and continued after finding the exact quote she was looking for, "Crooked."
"He's not the only one to mention that," I burst out laughing, explaining, "I must have stared, but I don’t remember doing that."
"Who else commented on the way you used to look at Kate?"
"Pretty much every one of my co-workers," I chuckled. "After you guys left, they shared that they had always thought I stared at her. But they claimed my look was one of love, not crooked." I started planting a rational version of my gaze in her mind. "Apparently, they knew before me that she’d succeeded in conquering my heart."
"Conquering your heart?" She pinched her chin, "That's a bit of an overstatement, don’t you think? After all, she was just one more customer who used to come regularly to the coffee shop you work at."
"I thought so too, but your investigation indicates that I looked at her... How did you call it?"
"Crookedly," she smiled at me.
"Yes. A crooked look." I returned her smile. "I hadn’t noticed that I did that, but the facts suggest I probably looked at her in a crooked way," I repeated, laughing for a few moments.
It was important for me to create a personal bond with her, hoping to inspire her sympathy with un-requited love and the embarrassment that accompanies it. I hoped, by doing so, I would get a few more days to work with Katarina in the cabin before my lies were discovered and my time with her came to its unavoidable end.
"So, in other words, you're admitting that you're in love with Kate?"
"I... I don’t know what to call it, but when she walks in and I see her eyes, my day lights up. When she talks to me…sometimes it feels like I hover a few inches in the air."
"Let me help you, Mr. Costa. That’s called being in love."
"Okay," I smiled at her. "So I guess I'm in love with Kate."
"In that case, why did you kidnap her?"
"What?"
"Where are you keeping her?"
"Wait, what?" I didn’t have to act surprised. I really had been sure I had managed to fool her.
"Where is she? Where's Kate?" she slowly repeated her accusations. "Kate? The girl you're in love with? Where are you holding her?"
"I'm not... I'm not..."
"You're not what?"
"I didn’t kidnap her and I'm not holding her anywhere."
"And I don’t believe you, Mr. Costa. If you want to get out of here as a free man, I recommend you do something extreme to convince me otherwise."
"But that's the truth. I shouldn’t need to do anything. The truth will be revealed whether I try to prove it or not, because that's the way truth goes."
This time, I didn’t think my innocent act had succeeded in changing her mind about me but, nevertheless, she wrote a few long lines in her notebook before she looked up and returned to her questions. Questions that indicated my time with Katarina was running out.
"Tell me, Mr. Costa, do you make it a habit to wear jeans and a black T-shirt, like the ones you're wearing now?"
"What?" I took a look at myself, wearing the outfit Katarina had described as my uniform in the cabin, and realized it actually did characterize my apparel in general.
"Do you have a hearing problem, Mr. Costa, or are you just shocked that I know how to put two and two together?"
"None of the options you suggested, Officer Swenson. I just don’t understand how my fashion style is related to your investigation."
"Oh, I'll be glad to explain it to you. The last time we spoke, you were wearing your work uniform, but now when I see how your casual dress style looks like…" She paused and started playing a video showing myself putting Katarina into the backseat of the rental car and looked back at me with her chilling gaze. "Do you recognize yourself in this video?"
"Absolutely not, Ms. Swenson."
"Officer Swenson to you, loser!" she slammed her fists hard on the table.
"Miss... Officer Swenson ... Ma’am... I don’t understand why you're suddenly talking to me that way."
"Mr. Costa, I’ve had enough of your games."
"I'm not playing any games." I tried my best to shed a frightened tear, without any success.
"Son, I don’t know who you think you're talking to, but you'd better start singing."
I sat there for more than two hours. I insisted that I had no hand in the kidnapping, tried to convince Officer Swenson that this wasn’t a case of unrequited love that had become violent, and that I knew nothing about the yellow car I had actually rented from another country especially for the mission I had just renounced.
"Please know that I'm watching you, Mr. Costa."
"Okay, I understand, but I don’t understand why."
"Because I asked you to convince me you were innocent and you failed, that's why."
"I'm not..."
"Oh, but you are and I'll find a way to prove it," she interrupted me. "You're free to go, but know that I'll be there, watching your every step. I'm going to cling to the back of your neck like a painful pimple, patiently waiting for the momen
t when you make a mistake. And you will. In the end, everyone makes mistakes," she completed, and left the interrogation room without waiting for any response from me.
I knew there was a slight chance she had said what she had in order to gauge my reaction to her accusations. I also assumed she had spoken exactly the same way with Aidan and anyone else that she suspected. Never the less, I left the station with a very ominous feeling. I wasn’t so sure it was safe to go back to the cabin and to Katarina at that moment, and so, I didn’t.
As I made my way to the exit away from the city, I saw a squad car following me and realized that I had no choice but to stay away from the woman I was drawn to. At least, for the time being.
It seemed that Katarina had been right. I should have given her a way to know the whole truth before I left.
I should have taken into account the possibility that I wouldn’t be able to fulfill the process I had put in motion.
I could only hope it wasn’t too late. I knew that if our process was interrupted without Mr. Briggs' identity being fully revealed, he would yet again be able to plant a false truth in her.
Chapter 27
Kate
I felt a bit guilty for raising my voice and bursting out so childishly at Andrew, when it wasn’t him I was angry at.
I knew that, sooner or later, our vacation in the forest would come to its end. That's why it was important for me to discover the truth about my life before that.
I’d given him various opportunities to share the details he’d kept for himself. I suggested we do another guided imagery session, I suggested he write the important details for me in a sealed letter, but he insisted that the time had not yet come and I wasn’t prepared to take that risk.
I pretended I was offended when he refused all my stupid suggestions when, in fact, all I was looking for was a good reason to slam the door behind me, so that I could hurry up and look at him through the keyhole.
I hadn’t mentioned it in our brief conversation that morning, but I’d caught the shoebox that kept the last of my secrets on the living-room table out of the corner of my eye. I’d hoped he'd forget it there or, worst case scenario, I hoped to catch him putting it back in its excellent hiding place, and indeed, I saw him climb up on the marble counter and place it over the cupboards.
