“Hit me,” Walker said again, and this time their chests did bump, forcefully. But Jack knew he was standing still.
He placed a hand on his younger brother’s shoulder and squeezed. “I think that’s one can too many for you. Sleep it off.”
Walker sniffed and puffed out his chest. “You think I can’t take it? You think I’m not man enough to take what you took on our behalf for five damned years? I don’t need your protection anymore, big brother. I don’t need you to waltz in here and take care of everything like you do—and be reminded of how you took care of everything when we were kids.” He gritted his teeth. “Leave if you’re gonna leave, asshole. Be free of this place. But even the score already and just. Just. Do it.”
Jack pushed him back an arm’s length, but he sure as shit wasn’t going to let this go any further. “There’s no score, Walker. Jesus. You don’t owe me anything, and I sure as hell don’t want to be some twisted Jack Senior surrogate for you so you can deal with whatever it is that’s eating you. Do all of us a favor and sleep it off.” It was like he was eighteen again, trying to coax his father to do the same before getting himself pushed down a flight of wooden stairs.
Walker let out a bitter laugh. “You don’t have it in you, even when I deserve it. You stand there, beer in hand, yet other than one time—after all the hell you took from him for five years—I’ve never seen you out of control once in your goddamn life. It ain’t my kid or my woman. I’d tell them to run as far away from here as they could if it was. It’s you, Jack, the one who always kept it together—who took every fist or boot so we didn’t have to. So don’t tell me they can do better. Don’t make that your reason for leaving us—I mean them—again.”
Walker crumpled his empty can and chucked it forcefully over the railing and into the fire. “Screw this,” he said and stalked off the stairs and toward the open field.
Jack stood there in stunned silence for several long moments.
“He’ll be all right,” Luke finally said. “He just needs to blow off a little steam.”
Jack realized his free hand was balled into a fist, and although he had to force himself to unclench it, he’d never once considered hitting his brother. “You think the same things he does?” he asked. “That you deserve the kind of treatment I tried to keep from you?”
Luke shrugged. “I think it’s a hell of a thing for any kid to watch the brother he looks up to most get abused by the one person who was supposed to protect them all.”
Luke’s ever-present smile was gone, and Jack felt an ache so big it almost rivaled the years of his life he kept trying to forget.
“We all got our demons to dance with, Jack. Walker’s still trying to find his way back to the land of the living.”
“And you?” he asked.
Luke winked, but it was forced. “Everything I do is living, big bro.” He shrugged. “I don’t know. I think you gotta do whatever makes living your life bearable.” He looked around the deck, littered with empty cans. “I’ll get this in the morning,” he said, then left his brother alone with his thoughts and a confused-looking dog.
Jack crouched so he was eye level with Scully. “That was ten years’ worth of unsaid shit that I guess needed saying, huh?”
The dog lapped at his jaw.
“Is that all you have to say?” Jack asked him, and he received another slobbery kiss in return. He gave Scully an affectionate pat on the head and stood. Then he started collecting the empty cans, cleaning up the one mess he knew he could.
Chapter Nineteen
Ava backed into the laundry room off the kitchen as soon as she saw her father’s name pop up on her phone. She’d done so well avoiding any verbal run-ins with him all week, but now that it was Friday, she knew she couldn’t ignore the call and shoot off a quick text. Owen had his first official game the next day, and he’d want to confirm when and where, despite her having emailed her parents the entire season’s schedule.
“Hi, Dad,” she said softly. Owen was taking a shower, and Jack and his brothers were finishing up in the vineyard. The crop was almost ready to do its thing—or at least try. But it would take the better part of a year to see if the grapes would flourish. They were close enough, though, that they didn’t need Ava telling them what to do anymore.
“Hi, Dad?” he said, the hint of teasing in his tone. “You’ve been giving your old man the brush-off all week, and all I get is ‘Hi, Dad’?”
He was trying to make light of the situation, but both of them knew what was brewing beneath the surface, so she decided to dive right in.
“This week’s been good for him—for Owen. You should see how well he clicks not only with Jack but with his uncles and his great-aunt Jenna.”
He was silent for several beats before saying, “Doesn’t mean the Everett boy is good for him. Even if I let slide what happened a decade ago, you can’t know a man’s character after a couple of weeks.”
Ava groaned. “This, Dad. This is why you got the brush-off all week. He doesn’t deserve your judgment—”
But he cut her off before she could reason with him. “The hell he doesn’t, Ava. Who was there for your morning sickness, for monitoring your meals when you got that pregnancy diabetes? Huh? Who was in the delivery room when the epidural wasn’t doing its job and you thought those goddamn contractions would tear you apart?”
“Dad,” she said, trying not to let her voice tremble.
“If he’s such a stand-up guy…If he’s not someone I should worry about entering the lives of my daughter and my grandson, I’m waiting to hear how you’ve come to this grand conclusion. For ten years you hear nothing from him, and the second he waltzes back into town, you take Owen and shack up with this stranger—a stranger with a past full of violence—for a week?”
“Dad!” she cried, and she was shaking now, but she didn’t care. “How dare you judge him without ever taking a second to look past one night—one terrible night—in Jack’s life, and how dare you judge me when everything I’ve ever done has been for the good of those I loved, including Jack Everett. I’m grateful for what you and Mom did for Owen and me. There is no possible way to ever repay you. But enough is enough. Jack made a mistake when he was a scared, messed-up kid. How long does he have to pay for it?”
“It’s more than that,” her father said. “I don’t care if Everett knew nothing about his son. He walked out of your life and only came back by accident, and we’re all supposed to rejoice just so he can leave and hurt you again—hurt the both of you?”
“I gotta go, Dad.” She heard the front door open and slam shut, followed by the not-so-distant grumbling of what she knew were three tired, sweaty men. “The game is at eleven in the elementary school baseball field. We’ll be there by 10:30. Send my love to Mom.”
She ended the call and quickly swiped under her eyes, hoping the three brothers were too exhausted from their longest day of work yet to notice she’d started to cry.
“Something smells good,” she heard Walker say.
“Too bad it ain’t for you!” Luke answered. “You’ll be eating good old-fashioned rodeo fare tonight, my friend.”
By the time the three men made it into the kitchen, Ava had a smile painted on her face as bright as the yellow, pink, and orange flowers on the sundress she was wearing.
Jack stopped short as soon as he saw her, and his brothers had to struggle not to plow right into him.
“Whoa,” he said. “I thought you were heading back here early so Owen could shower and eat a ‘sensible meal’ before he was carted off to the rodeo.”
She let out a nervous laugh. “He’s finishing up in the shower, but I don’t care if he stuffs himself full of nachos and hot pretzels tonight. It’s a special occasion for him—getting to see Luke compete.” Her cheeks grew hot, but she didn’t care if they saw her blush. It would hopefully distract from her glassy eyes. “The—uh—sorta sensible meal is for you.” She turned toward Jack, who still stood there looking mildly stunned.
Luke smacked his brother on the back of the head. “Forget it, asshole. You and Jenna are on Shortstop duty tonight. Now go shower. You smell worse than the stables.”
Walker smacked Luke back, but Ava could tell it was all in good fun. She liked seeing them happy, acting like brothers rather than what she’d overheard the other night. She hadn’t been able to make out what the three of them were saying, but sound carried through a house with the windows open and no one or nothing nearby to drown out the noise.
They’d been arguing—all three of them—yet Jack hadn’t breathed a word of it to her.
Luke and Walker made their way upstairs to rinse their own hard day’s work away. Jack, though, just stared at her.
“What?” she asked, first tightening the halter of her dress and then fidgeting with the long braid that hung over a bare shoulder.
Jack shook his head as if waking himself from a daydream. “Sorry,” he said. “You’re just—I’ve never seen anyone so beautiful.”
She covered her face with her hands, unable to take such a compliment without going completely crimson.
In seconds she felt his rough hands wrap around hers, pulling them free. She bit her bottom lip as his gaze bore into her, so full of heat and—and something she couldn’t name.
Damn it, why was this man so hard to read?
“You made me dinner?” he asked, his voice deep and smooth.
She nodded.
“I thought I was supposed to take you out tonight.” He scrubbed a hand across his deliciously stubbled jaw. “I distinctly remember Jenna saying, ‘Walker and I are taking Owen to the rodeo so you can take that girl on a proper date. Now don’t y’all go and mess it up.’”
She shrugged. “Surprise?”
He grinned. “Was this always the plan?”
She shook her head. “Not until today, actually. But you all worked so hard all week, and I know Jenna had some very specific instructions, but it’s our last night here, and I kinda wanted to stay in. With you.”
Jack’s eyes searched the kitchen and the living room beyond. His Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed. “I never thought of this place as somewhere to take a girl on a date…”
He trailed off, and Ava’s blush changed from one born of flattery to one fueled by utter mortification.
“Shit,” she said softly. “Shit. I wasn’t thinking. Of course this is a terrible idea. I’ll cover the lasagna and leave it for your brothers. I’m sure we can find someplace nice to go without a reservation—”
Jack cut her off with a kiss. Her eyes were still open, wide with the horror of her mistake, until the taste of him registered, until the scent of his sunbaked skin mixed with the musky earth he’d toiled in all day enveloped her, and she sank into this man who could flip off the switch of her worry so that all she could concentrate on was the kiss.
“I need to shower,” he said, pulling away.
She nodded. Words weren’t exactly possible at the moment.
“And then we are going to have our first date in this house because it’s about damn time I make some new memories here. Besides, hell if I’m gonna let Luke and Walker get their hands on a home-cooked meal meant for me.”
“There’s enough for all of you—”
“Red?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m not sharing the lasagna or your company with anyone tonight. Okay?”
She let out a breath and smiled. “Yeah. Okay.”
Chaos erupted as Owen and Scully came running from the guest bedroom where Owen had gotten himself dressed after his shower. Walker lumbered down the stairs in a red and white flannel shirt and jeans—just the right amount of California cowboy—followed by Luke in full rodeo gear, including the boots and the hat.
“No stitches tonight,” Jack said to his daredevil brother, even though he knew it was a pointless request.
“No promises,” Luke countered with a wry grin.
“And you…” Jack pointed at Walker. “You are on Shortstop detail. He comes home in one piece without needing to vomit from all the shit you’re gonna feed him.”
Jenna burst through the front door, and Jack relaxed a little.
“And you’re on Walker detail…which means you’re backup for Shortstop as well.”
Jenna gave him a firm salute. “Sir! Yes sir!”
Jack rolled his eyes but then paused when he noticed a bruise on Jenna’s wrist. “Don’t tell me the chicks attacked again,” he said with concern.
She laughed, but Jack could have sworn the reaction was forced.
“No chicks,” she said. “Banged it on a doorknob. Never said I was graceful.”
Jack held her chin in his hand, turning her head from left to right as he inspected.
“What in the hell are you doing?” she asked.
He dropped his hand, satisfied for the moment. “Seeing if you’ve had any other recent accidents.”
She waved him off. “Who’s the guardian here, huh? Me or you?”
“That isn’t a clear response, Jenna.”
“You didn’t ask a question.”
“Fine,” he said, soft enough that the others—now congregating in the kitchen—couldn’t hear. “Here’s a question for you: Are you still seeing the egg man, and is he hitting you?” His jaw clenched, and his hand balled into a fist at the thought of anyone laying a hand on his aunt—or anyone he loved.
She scoffed, but he could see it. Something was off.
“We went on a few dates. It didn’t work out. So no. I’m not seeing him anymore, and he’s not hitting me.”
“Jenna…”
“Jack…”
“Don’t play games when it comes to this type of shit,” he said. “Because if this guy is hitting you, and I find out who he is…”
“I took care of it,” she snapped under her breath. “I have been looking after myself too long to be accused of not knowing how to do it.”
Jack opened his mouth to ask her one more question, but the two were bombarded by the whole rodeo posse, ready to get on the road.
Ava bent down to give Owen a hug and kiss. “You have my cell phone number, right?”
Owen recited her number back to her.
“And I have it,” Walker said.
“So do I,” added Luke.
“Same here,” Jenna said.
Ava let out a nervous laugh. “Okay, fine. So I worry when I send my son off to a rodeo that’s almost two hours away.”
“Ninety minutes,” Luke said.
“Eighty if we go at least ten miles over the speed limit,” Walker amended.
Jenna groaned. “Which we are not going to do since I’m driving.”
Ava kissed Owen once more on the forehead and stood up. “Well, I guess that’s it, then.”
Owen looked at his mother, then at Jack. “Are you taking my mom on a date?”
Jack gave the boy a single nod. “With your approval, of course. You all right with it?”
Owen looked him up and down. Then he turned his gaze to Ava. “Are you all right with it?” he asked her.
“Yeah. But your opinion counts, too.”
Owen shrugged. “I guess if my dad can’t come back to be with us, Jack’s pretty cool.”
Everyone in the entryway went silent. Ava pressed her thumb to the corner of her eye, and Jack wondered if she was fighting back tears because he felt like he’d been socked in the gut.
But Ava smiled and tousled his hair. “Jack is pretty cool, bud. I’m glad you like him.”
“So…we should head out,” Jenna said, and Jack was grateful for the redirection.
“Okay,” Ava said. “Just don’t feed him too much junk or let him out of your sight, which I know you won’t, but there…I said it. I’m a mom. I can’t help it.”
Luke pursed his lips. “Actually,
I’m worried. Something isn’t right.”
Ava’s eyes widened as Luke slipped out the door and onto the porch. Seconds later he was back inside with a brown cowboy hat that he plopped on Owen’s head.
“Yes!” Owen said, pumping his fist in the air.
Jack laughed, Owen’s glee contagious.
“Now we’re ready to go,” Luke said.
“Good luck, Luke!” Ava said as they started to file out the door. “Or is that bad to say? Is it like theater where you have to say break a leg? Like, maybe it’s break a hoof?”
Luke laughed. “Good luck works fine. Now you kids have a good time.”
Jack and Ava stood at the window and watched Luke, Walker, Owen, and Jenna trail out and into Jenna’s car. Once they were out of sight, he pulled Ava to him and kissed her sweetly on the forehead.
“Tomorrow for sure,” he said. “I don’t want to keep it from him any longer.”
Ava pulled back to look him in the eye. “He’s gonna be upset at first,” she said. “And he’ll want to know how much a part of his life you’ll be after this week.”
He nodded once, slowly. “What about you? What do you want?”
She pressed her lips into a smile and splayed her hand against his chest. “I don’t want to be at the bottom of my priority list anymore. And I want someone in my life who won’t put me there either.”
He didn’t know what to say. She was the one who was good with words. They’d once made him feel loved when he hadn’t felt worthy. But her words had also pushed him away at the one time in his life when something had made him happy. When someone made him happy.
Was she saying he could do that for her? She wasn’t telling him to go this time, but she also hadn’t asked him to stay.
Why wasn’t she asking him to stay? And if she did, would he? She hadn’t given him a choice before, and maybe that’s what this all was—him finally getting to choose. Still, he wanted to know what she wanted, because if she wanted him, did New York really hold a candle?
Her brows furrowed.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
She shook her head. “This isn’t supposed to be how our first date begins. It’s a little heavy-handed, don’t you think?”
Cowboy Brave Page 45
