by Katie Ashley
She shoved herself so hard away from the person that she ended up elbowing him in the ribs. He groaned. “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you,” she quickly apologized.
“It’s okay, Megan,” he murmured drowsily.
That voice. It took only a second for her to register who she was in bed with. And with that realization, everything from the night before came crashing down on her. She had accidentally gotten drunk off her ass, Pesh had taken her to his house to sober up, and then…oh God, she had come on to him like a brazen floozy. She buried her head in her hands and moaned.
“Hey, how do you feel this morning?” he asked.
“Like I’ve been run over by a truck.”
“Want me to fix you a good hangover cure?”
She peeked at him through her fingers. “You actually know a hangover cure?”
He smiled. “You think someone like me has never been drunk?” When she bobbed her head, he laughed. “I’m sorry to disappoint you, but there have been many, many times I’ve woken up just as you are now.”
“That’s hard to imagine.” She gazed down at the scrubs and T-shirt she was in. Although she doubted it, she couldn’t help but ask. “Did we…”
“No, we didn’t.”
She arched her brows in surprise. “If we didn’t sleep together, then why did you…I mean, why are you in bed with me?”
“Because you begged me to stay.”
She gasped in horror. Wasn’t it enough that she had thrown herself so wantonly at him, but now she’d begged him to stay with her? “I did?”
He nodded. “You said you didn’t want to be alone.”
Vaguely she remembered pleading with him to lie close to her. What a nightmare. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t apologize.” When she started to protest, he held up a hand. “I have to admit it was nice being in bed with someone again—feeling their warmth, the softness of their body as they lay beside you.” He swallowed hard. “I’ve missed that more than I knew.”
Overcome with the emotions threatening to overtake her, Megan didn’t know what to say. All she knew is she needed to get out of there. “I need to get home…or to Emma’s. I can’t let my parents think I stayed out all night with a man I just met.”
“I understand. I wouldn’t dream of compromising your reputation.”
She stared at him for a moment. Sometimes the way he spoke made it seem like he was from a different world or time period. “I, uh, I need to use the bathroom.”
“Go ahead.”
Tumbling out of the covers, she then streaked across the room. Once she closed the door behind her, she exhaled the breath she’d been holding. She made it to the toilet just in time to throw up again. She wondered after doing the same thing the night before how there was anything left in her stomach to empty. Once she finished, she leaned over the sink, pooling water in her hand before bringing it to her mouth. After gargling to rid herself of the nasty taste, she eventually dug under the counter for some mouthwash, and then brushed her teeth.
Without a hairbrush or comb, she did her best to tame her out-of-control hair. Once she surmised that she looked presentable enough to face the firing squad, aka Aidan and Emma, she left the bathroom. Pesh had thrown on some clothes and stood in the middle of the room. He raised his brows expectantly at her.
“I’m ready to go now.”
“Of course.”
When she started for the bedroom door, she abruptly stopped. “Wait, my dress?”
“I’ll send it out to be dry cleaned.”
“Oh,” she murmured. “Thank you.”
In silence, they made their way through the house. Megan tried not to be so obvious as she took in the high ceilings of the living room, the floor to ceiling windows that overlooked a large, spacious yard. Pesh had an amazing house—one that was far too big for just him. It certainly was made for a family—the one he sadly didn’t have.
As he started to open the door leading out to the garage for her, Pesh stopped and turned around. Staring intently at her, he said, “I’d like to see you again.”
Megan couldn’t help the shocked gasp that escaped her lips. She’d made a repeated fool out of herself the night before, and he still wanted to see her? “You can’t be serious.”
“I am.”
She gave a slight jerk of her head. “I don’t think that is a good idea.”
“But why?” he countered sincerely.
With a contemptuous snort, she replied, “Isn’t it obvious?”
“If you’re alluding to the fact you accidentally got drunk last night and then became ill, that has little relevance to me. Accidents happen, and I’m man enough to realize that.” He closed the gap between them. “I liked being with you yesterday.”
Remembering what Emma had said, Megan couldn’t help asking, “You want to date me, don’t you?”
“Yes of course. What else would I want to do?”
When she replied, “Have sex,” a flush entered his cheeks.
“That is not what I meant.”
“And that’s a pity.”
His brows furrowed. “Whatever do you mean?”
“You and I…we want different things. You want to date and get married again, right?”
“Yes, that is something I desire very much.”
She shook her head. “But I don’t want to be in a serious relationship right now with you or anyone for that matter. I’m certainly not ready to get married anytime soon. I just wanted to have some fun with someone.”
Pesh frowned. “I don’t think I understand.”
“What I want from you is the same thing I wanted last night. Just sex,” she answered honestly.
“You don’t want to date me…you only want to have sex with me?”
If the situation hadn’t been so dire, Megan might’ve laughed at the horrified expression on Pesh’s face. He appeared absolutely floored that she could ever think of only using him as a sex toy. Finally, when she gathered herself together, she shook her head. “I’m sorry, but that’s the way I feel.”
She braced herself for some sort of wrath out of him or even a lecture. What he did was even more surprising. He gave her a sad smile. “And I’m sorry you feel that way because I would have really enjoyed getting to know you better.” Without another word, he opened the door. Always the gentleman, he waited for her to go through first.
Tucking her head to her chest, she bypassed him to walk to the car. Once again, he appeared to open the car door for her. “Thank you,” she murmured.
He nodded before walking around the front of the car. Without another word to her, Pesh cranked up, and then began backing down the driveway.
The ride to Aidan and Emma’s was only twenty minutes, but it seemed to take an eternity. The painful silence hung heavy around her. Pesh didn’t look at her. Instead, he kept his gaze firmly on the road ahead of them.
When he pulled into Aidan and Emma’s driveway, Megan felt her stomach clench. She wished there was some way to make things right between them. But she had a feeling she had gone too far and said too much. As he put the car in park, he turned to look at her. “Thank you for the ride,” she said.
“You’re welcome. It was my pleasure.”
“Most of all, I want to thank you for taking care of me last night. You truly went above and beyond. I can never thank you enough.”
“You don’t have to thank me. I’m glad I was able to help you.”
Nibbling on her bottom lip, she finally allowed herself to say what she was holding back on. “I wish things could be different,” she said softly.
When she dared herself to look at him, she found him staring intently at her. “I’m sorry, too. Take care of yourself. Okay?”
She bobbed her head. “The same to you.” With trembling hands, she fumbled for the door handle. When she was finally able to open the door, she stumbled out onto the pavement. As she made her way up the driveway, she could feel Pesh’s eyes on her. The car remained parked as s
he climbed the porch steps and rang the doorbell. She hoped that Noah was already up, and she wasn’t waking the household.
Aidan threw open the door. “Megan? What the hell?” he asked.
His question and concern caused her to burst into tears. “Why are you crying?” Aidan demanded.
“It’s a long story.”
He glanced from her out the door to Pesh’s car. His expression darkened. “Did Pesh hurt you?”
“No! Of course not.”
“If he’s made you cry, I don’t care whether he’s Noah’s godfather or not. I’ll punch his lights out!”
She grabbed his arm. “Stop it, Ankle! It’s not him, it’s me. It’s all my fault. Okay?”
He stared at her in surprise. “What happened?”
“Give me some coffee and a chance to calm down, and then I’ll tell you everything.”
Although his expression was skeptical, Aidan nodded, and then started to close the door. Megan stole one last glance of Pesh as his car started reversing down the driveway. She hoped for her sake and his it was the last time she would have to see him.
Megan nervously tapped her thumbs on the steering wheel of her car. Her clinical placement had come through, and she was now on her way to make her introductions to her preceptor, the nurse who would supervise her. Although she had initially been disappointed in not receiving Grady, she was still excited to be doing the last part of the journey to becoming a nurse. She was also grateful she hadn’t received the night shift that some of her fellow nursing students had. She would have rarely been able to see Mason if she had to sleep during the day and work at night.
She pulled into the parking lot of the Wellstar ER and eased into the first space she found. After turning off the car, she grabbed her folder of paperwork along with her purse and headed inside. She stopped at the front desk. “I’m not a patient. I’m a clinical student here to see Kristi Parkman.”
“Go on through,” the receptionist said, before she buzzed open the Authorized Personnel Only door. Breezing inside the heart of the ER, Megan couldn’t help feeling excited. She couldn’t wait until she got her feet wet by working with patients.
Glancing around, she wasn’t exactly sure how she was going to find the preceptor. She stopped at an area teaming with nurses. “Can I help you?” one of them asked.
“Yes, I’m here to see Kristi Parkman.”
A tall blonde woman in her fifties came over to her with a beaming smile. “You must be Ms. McKenzie?”
“I am.”
“It’s so nice to meet you.”
Megan smiled. “It’s nice meeting you, too.”
“We’re so very glad to have you. I’ve taken a look at your transcript, and it’s quite impressive.”
“Thank you,” Megan replied.
“Why don’t I show you around today? That way you’ll be ready to go with the flow tomorrow.”
“Sounds good.”
With a smile, Kristi led her around the maze of rooms. She pointed out where the medicine room was, the trauma area, and where she would find the break room. Each time they passed a nurse or a doctor, Kristi was quick to introduce Megan.
“Everyone seems very friendly,” Megan mused.
“It really is a great place to work. Now, I’m not going to lie that some of the residents can be real assholes. But we’re so lucky to have a supervisor who is such a sweetheart.”
“That’s wonderful.”
“Yes, everyone loves Dr. Nadeen.”
Megan’s heartbeat slowed to a standstill. Nadeen. No, it couldn’t be. Surely there were more doctors with that last name. Searching her mind, she tried desperately to remember where he said he worked.
“Oh good, he’s just down the hall. Let me introduce you two.”
“No, that’s really isn’t necessary,” Megan protested feebly.
Ignoring her, Kristi called, “Dr. Nadeen, come meet our newest nursing candidate.”
The moment he turned around, Megan felt like she was going to throw up. After spending two months trying hard to forget about her infamous night with Pesh Nadeen, there he was right in front of her. She couldn’t help having the classic line from Casablanca flash in her head, “Out of all the gin joints in all the world, she had to walk into mine.” She certainly felt that way about all the hospitals she could have possibly been assigned to, she had to be assigned to his.
The shock and surprise registered on his face as well. He was quick to mask it by smiling warmly at her. “Hello again, Megan.”
Kristi’s brows shot up at the familiarity of Pesh’s greeting. “You know each other?”
“Um, well,” Megan began. How was she going to explain? The last thing she needed was to get off on the wrong foot with her coworkers.
Pesh nodded. “She and I share a godson.”
“Oh how wonderful.” Kristi patted Megan’s back. “What luck for you then ending up here out of all the hospitals?”
“Yes, what luck,” Megan murmured.
Kristi smiled. “Well, I’ll let you two catch up for a minute or two.”
“No, that’s okay. You don’t have to do that,” Megan protested.
Waving her hand dismissively, Kristi said, “It gives me a chance to go grab a snack and something to drink. Be back in a few, and we’ll finish the tour.”
Megan fought the urge to run after Kristi as she walked off. Instead, she turned back to Pesh who was staring expectantly at her.
“You don’t exactly look happy to see me,” Pesh said.
She shook her head wildly. “How could I be? The man, who I completely made an ass out of myself in front of, is at the hospital where I’m doing my clinicals. That doesn’t exactly make my day.”
“For the last time, you have nothing to be embarrassed about.”
“Sorry, but that does not make me feel any better,” she grumbled.
“What can I do to put you at ease about working with me?”
Rubbing her now aching head, she replied, “I don’t know. If I thought it wouldn’t make me look bad, I’d request a transfer.”
“I offend you that much?” Pesh asked. As she gazed up at him, his expression was wounded.
“No, no, you don’t offend me. It’s just that…” She chewed mercilessly on her bottom lip before she continued. After taking a ragged breath, she replied, “It’s just that for the past two years, I had pretty good control of my life. The night I was with you, I let all that control crumble. By getting drunk, I became someone else—someone I used to be. The girl, or woman, who would do anything to get a man’s attention. I don’t like that person very much, and I don’t ever want to go back there. Seeing you just makes me remember all of that.”
Megan couldn’t help being surprised by how honest she’d been able to be with him. Pesh remained silent for a moment. His dark eyes bore into hers. “I am sorry that you reflect so negatively on the night we were together. For me, it was not marred by drinking or you getting sick. I enjoyed spending time with you and getting to know you.” He swallowed hard. “I enjoyed waking up with you. I would give anything for you to be able to look at me without having to feel bad about yourself.”
“You really enjoyed being with me that night?”
He nodded. “When I told you I wanted to see you again, I was serious.”
She sighed. “That’s very sweet of you, but I haven’t changed my mind about dating.”
“You haven’t?”
With a shake of her head, she replied, “I have too much going on in my life right now to get involved with someone. It wouldn’t be fair to them…to you. Especially since we still want very different things from each other.”
“I see,” he replied.
Megan noticed the sadness that darkened his expression. “I’m sorry,” she murmured.
“You have nothing to regret. Any grief I’m experiencing is once again my fault.” He gave her a rueful smile. “I seem to keep falling for women who aren’t meant for me.”
She sucked in
a harsh breath at his words. “Falling? You are…you were falling for me?”
Pesh opened his mouth to reply, but at the sound of Kristi coming back from the break room, he shut it. Closing the gap between them, he whispered, “Don’t worry about working with me, Megan. We’ll always be friends, and I will respect your wishes and your distance.”
For some reason, his words had the opposite effect they should have, and regret ricocheted through her. Finally, she managed to say, “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
With a smile, he then turned and walked away. She heaved a painful breath as Kristi walked up to her. “Such a sweetheart, isn’t he?”
“Yes, he is,” Megan murmured.
“Not bad on the eyes either.”
A nervous giggle escaped Megan’s lips. “No, he’s not.”
“I swear that half of the women here in the ER act like they’re in heat whenever he comes around.” Kristi fanned herself. “I mean, that body, those eyes, and those dimples. Lord, if I wasn’t a happily married woman, what I wouldn’t want to do to that man!”
Megan knew exactly what Kristi meant. Unfortunately, she was never going to get the chance to experience it for herself. Somehow she’d managed to find the only man left in the world who wouldn’t partake in just a sexual relationship. No, Pesh had to want more than she was willing to give.
“Did you hear what I said?” Kristi asked.
Megan snapped her gaze from Pesh’s retreating form back to face Kristi. “I’m sorry what?”
Kristi laughed. “Oh no, I’m about to lose another one to Dr. Nadeen’s charms, huh?”
Shaking her head wildly, Megan replied, “No, no, we’re just friends—I don’t feel anything like that for him.”
Kristi winked. “Yeah, just keep telling yourself that, honey.”
As Pesh exited one of the exam rooms, he saw Megan sitting on a stool at the counter, working on a chart. When the door shut behind him, she jerked her head up and caught him staring. He cleared his throat and walked over to her. “Hello,” he said, pleasantly.
