by Eve Vaughn
“I’m going to look great tonight. I’m so happy that you were available. I heard you’re hard to book.”
“Well, my schedule has been a bit tight lately, but I’m glad I could fit you in for your special event.”
Sarah preened in front of the mirror. “I’m going to be the best-looking mother at the bar mitzvah tonight. I appreciate you telling me what products you use so I can purchase them myself. The last gal who did my makeup wouldn’t tell me the brands she used. I guess she thought if I knew what she used, I wouldn’t need her, that that’s the very reason I didn’t hire her again. I will definitely be using you again.”
Esther sighed with regret. “I really hope I’ll be able to help you again but for the next month, I’m taking a little time off to move.”
“Oh? Are you leaving the area?”
“Yes, I’m heading up north. In the past several months, I’ve built a sizable clientele which has afforded me the opportunity to travel. I’ve had a lot of work in New York lately but I want to stay somewhere in between here my old place so that I won’t be too far away from my regulars, at least for now.”
“Well good for you, but too bad for the rest of us. What form of payment do you take?”
“I take it all. If you’d like to use credit, I have an electronic card swiper.”
“Sounds great.”
Once Esther accepted payment, Sarah wished her luck and she headed out. She couldn’t help but smile as she slid into her vehicle. Esther was proud of the fact that she’d been able to purchase it outright without getting a loan. It was almost ten years old, but it was still in good condition and quite reliable.
If someone would have told her three years ago that she would be living independently with her own apartment, car and business she wouldn’t have believed them. Her time with Fiona had made her content but she was still dependent on someone else’s goodwill. But now she was completely independent. She finally knew what true freedom.
Esther was thankful that her schedule was busy today; she made sure that she didn’t have any down time so she wouldn’t have the think about things that were better left in the past. It had been exactly three years since she’d last seen Matthias. She didn’t blame him for walking away from her, after all, she’d kept him in the dark about her marriage to Mike. When she’d tried to tell him the truth Mike had painfully dug his fingers into her skin. Mike had a way of hurting her in front of other people without them noticing. It was a technique he’d perfected. So when he produced that picture that of her holding a baby, Esther could tell from the look in Matthias’s eyes that nothing she could say would make him believe her.
In actuality, the children in that picture on Mike’s phone were his sister’s children. Theresa was the only one in Mike’s family who was actually nice to her. Around the time that picture was taken, Theresa had recently had a baby and asked if Esther wanted to hold him. There was no way Esther would turn down the opportunity to hold the precious bundle, so she’d gladly accepted the offer. Theresa had thought she looked cute holding baby Deandre so she’d taken a picture. Just as she was about to snap the picture, Elle Theresa’s three-year-old had come over. And of course, Mike was hovering. Mike must have gotten that picture from his sister.
Mike had always been a smooth operator and a practiced liar. That entire day had been a complete nightmare. Once Matthias had walked away and Fiona had run out of the shop to chase him, Mike had threatened her again. He told her that he had intimated that Fiona might find herself in an accident.
Esther couldn’t have that on her conscience, not after all she’d done for her. So she agreed to go with him. She believed she had nothing to lose after all, Matthias was gone and so was her chance of having a normal relationship.
Esther tried not to shake as they headed back to the home she’d left nearly a year ago. She’d be cooped up in a car with him for at least five hours and she was terrified. Mike didn’t allow her to bring anything with her. The five-hour trip back home had been excruciating. Neither one of them spoke. She could tell that Mike’s brain was working, probably on what punishment he’d inflict on her. The one time he’d stopped for gas, Esther had thought about running, but then Mike pulled up his shirt to reveal a gun in his waistband.
She’d gone from just plain scared to absolutely terrified. Mike wouldn’t allow her to get out of a car to use the restroom because he said he didn’t want her to get any ideas. The remainder of the trip had been excruciating because she had to pee and Mike had warned her that if she urinated in his car he would shoot her.
By the time they got home, Esther managed to get out of the car, but her bladder gave up on her.
Mike sneered. “Look, at you. You disgusting pig. I don’t even know why I bothered to look for you. Get your ass in the house.”
Esther shook uncontrollably as she walking into the house. Mike had barely closed the door before a fist came flying to her face, knocking Esther to the ground.
“Did you fucking think you could leave me, you stupid cunt. I should fucking kill you right now. Who the fuck do you think you are to embarrass me like that?” He punctuated his words with a kick to her stomach.
Esther curled into a ball to minimize the damage. She was expecting another blow, but instead, he grabbed her by the hair and yanked her off the floor. Mike then slammed her against the wall and shoved his gun into her mouth and pulled the trigger.
She didn’t die that night, but Mike had made her wish she had. For days, the beatings and the torture continued, but by some twist of fate, Esther was saved in the form of a drunk driver. The irony of that situation was that Mike had gone out to buy more beer because he’d run out. He never returned. Esther still had nightmares from those days when she was forced to go back with Mike despite going to counseling to help her through her post traumatic stress.
The one good thing that had come out of it was that since they were still legally married, everything was now hers. Esther had sold the house and moved to a small apartment. It was difficult finding work that didn’t involve flipping burgers because at the time she was a twenty-six-year-old woman with very little job experience except for her brief stint at Fiona’s. She had been on a futile job hunt one day when a woman admired her makeup and asked who’d done it. Once Esther confessed that she did it herself the woman had asked Esther if she was willing to do her makeup. That had been the start of her becoming an independent MUA.
Esther was determined to become a master at her craft. She wanted online tutorials and even took courses at the local beauty school. Word soon spread about her skill and professionalism and her client list started to grow. She was doing weddings, local theater, parties, and proms. She’d even been hired to do make up for a small indie film which had opened her up to bigger opportunities.
Since her business had expanded, she searched for more avenues to advance her career and one of those ways was developing her own makeup line. She was excited about her move and the fact that she’d be very close to Fiona who she’d kept in contact with over these past few years.
Her life, though not perfect, was finally hers, and Esther refused to let anyone take it from her again. It crossed her mind that since she was moving back to the area she had been forced to leave three years ago that she might, by some off chance run into Matthias. But it didn’t matter because he was part of her past. And she intended for him to stay there.
Chapter Eight
Matthias hesitated at the door of Fiona’s tea shop. It had been so long since he’d stepped foot inside and the last time he was here, it wasn’t a particularly pleasant experience. Taking a deep breath he walked in. A young brunette was at the counter.
She smiled as he approached. “Welcome to Fiona’s Tea Den. My name is Holly, how may I help you?”
“I was wondering if Fiona is available.”
“She’s in the back but I can go get her for you if you’d like. May I tell her who’s asking for her?”
“Yes, tell her it’s Matthi
as Lang.”
Holly went to the back and returned with Fiona whose hair was even more vivid and red than he remembered.
“It really is you?” Fiona said by way of greeting. There was no smile on her face but it also didn’t seem like she was adverse to his presence either. “What can I do for you today?”
He scratched the back of his head, wondering if he’d made a mistake by coming here. “Actually, I was hoping we could talk, that is if you have a moment.”
“Well, I was in the middle of something…but I guess I can squeeze you in.” She turned to Holly. “Could you please get two cups of Earl Grey and a slice of lemon cake for the gentleman? We’ll just be over there.” She pointed to the table by the window.
“You remembered.” He was surprised that she still recalled this trivial detail about him.
“Just because I’m old doesn’t mean my mind isn’t still sharp. Have a seat, young man.”
Matthias could tell from her tone that his presence wasn’t particularly welcome. “’Young man?’ Is the formality necessary?”
“You set the tone three years ago.”
“I don’t understand the hostility, Fiona. I’m not the one who was lied to.”
“Maybe not but everything isn’t what it seems.” She sighed and gestured toward the table. “Just take a seat.”
Matthias followed her to the table he used to frequent. Seconds later, Holly came out with two cups of tea and his dessert. “Thank you.” He nodded in the girl’s direction before focusing on Fiona. In the three years since he’d last seen her, she hadn’t changed a bit. “How have you been, Fiona?”
She narrowed her eyes and gave him a long accessing stare before answering. “I’ve been well, Matthias, but I’m sure you didn’t stop by just to see how I’m doing. What can I help you with?”
It was clear she wasn’t going to make this easy for him but could he really be faulted under the circumstances? “Three years ago, you told me to come by when I was ready to talk.”
She nodded. “Yes. Three years ago. I didn’t think I’d see you again.”
“To be quite honest, I didn’t think I’d be back here either. I’m not really sure where to begin so I’ll just come right out and say it. The day I last saw you, you said things weren’t as they appeared. I want to know what you meant by that.”
“Why do you want to know after all this time?”
“Because I haven’t stopped thinking about her and trust me, I’ve tried. I loved her but she was lying to me the entire time. I can’t believe I didn’t see it. I let my guard down with her and she betrayed my trust.”
“She didn’t lie to you. Did you ask her if she was married?”
“Come on Fiona, a lie by omission is still a lie. Besides, why would it have occurred to me that she was married when she wore no ring and she lived with you?”
“I suppose you’re right but she had her reasons. Yes, she was still married, but she’d left him. There was a reason she couldn’t get a divorce, however, so the marriage was really just a technicality. Her husband was not a good man.”
Matthias had gotten a weird vibe from Mike that day, but he didn’t dwell on that premonition because he’d been too hurt and angry. It was something he thought about over the years and then he’d remember that she had left with him anyway. Fiona wasn’t aware that he did, in fact, stop by the shop again. He had to see for himself if Esther had left or if it had all been a dream. Fiona had been out according to Chelsea, Fiona’s other worker at the time who’d been behind the counter that day. When he asked for Esther, Chelsea had said Esther no longer worked there. That had been all the confirmation Matthias had needed. “Then why did she leave with him?”
“Because he threatened her.”
“How?”
Fiona leaned forward. “Look, this really isn’t my story to tell but I think you should at least know that Esther had left her husband because things were bad between them. Really bad to the point where she feared for her safety. She’s had a pretty rough life and when I first met her she was so timid and withdrawn. The poor thing was scared of her own shadow. But when you came into the picture, I saw her blossom. It was a beautiful thing. I know you made her happy. She really cared a lot about you. I just don’t want you to judge the situation too harshly.”
Even though Fiona may not have told him much, Matthias could read between the lines. If Esther had really been frightened of her husband there could only have been one reason for it. Mike was abusive. Looking back, things that didn’t make sense then suddenly did. That huge scar on her hip, the excuses she made for not fully disrobing, the way she flinched whenever he made any sudden movement. It reminded him of someone else. His mother.
Before his father had abandoned them, he’d used Eun-hee as a punching bag. It had been a tumultuous time in his life that he’d tried to forget, but now all those buried memories came rushing back. He covered his face with his hands, feeling like a complete idiot for not realizing the truth until now. It didn’t excuse her from not telling him the truth, but he at least understood why she did. “He threatened her, so why didn’t you call the police? Why did you let her leave?” Matthias demanded.
“And what exactly would I have said to the police without any proof? She was determined to go and there was nothing I could do about it. If I could have, I would have made her stay, but as I already stated, he threatened her. I’m not exactly sure what was said, but I can guarantee that it had something to do with you and me. When he showed up, he knew who we were. It was obvious he had her followed before he put in an appearance.”
His heart sank. If Mike was dangerous, it was quite possible that Esther might be dead. What he thought as her betrayal was devastating enough but the possibility of her death was far worse.
She shook her head. “No. She’s alive.”
“How do you know?”
Fiona hesitated again. “I’ve been in contact with her since then. She’s doing well.”
Matthias felt a tightening in his chest. “So I guess things worked out for her and Mike.”
“No. They’re not together anymore.”
“I’m confused. If he’s such a threat then how did she managed to sever their union?”
“He’s dead.”
Matthias didn’t know how he felt about that. He wasn’t sure that it changed anything knowing that Esther was now free. He’d spent the last three years hurting and trying to forget her. Things couldn’t simply fall back to the way they were. Too much time had passed, and he had changed and he was certain that she had as well. But the thought of seeing her again, holding her in his arms, having her beneath him, made his heart skip a beat. Maybe if he could see her one more time, he could get over this obsession that she had become to him. Perhaps then he could move on with his life. He could stop comparing every woman he was with to her and eventually enter into a healthy relationship. “I see,” he finally responded. “So, how often do you speak with her?”
“At least once a week. She’s doing quite well for herself.”
“That’s good to know. Do you think…maybe I could have her number to speak with her?”
“I don’t think I’m at liberty to give that out. Look, Matthias, I have to be honest with you. Three years ago, I was rooting for the two of you. You two were so sweet together. But, Esther isn’t the person she used to be. She’s a lot harder and worldlier.”
“How so?”
“Well, she had a pretty sad past and her time with Mike was no cakewalk before she was with him initially. But when she went back to him, I think something pretty traumatic happened to her. She doesn’t talk about it. She won’t really go into the details of her husband’s death other than the cause. She’s very matter-of-fact about it. She’s definitely changed, but I guess I’ll see how much when she gets up here,” Fiona finished with a sigh.
Matthias stiffened at that last phrase. “What do you mean, when she gets up here?”
“Nothing. I’m just babbling. Look, I have a
delivery coming in soon and I’m working on my inventory so if you’ll excuse me.” She pushed away from the table and attempted to stand but Matthias caught her by the hand.
“Fiona, what aren’t you telling me?”
“Leave it alone, Matthias.”
“I can’t. If I were able to leave anything alone where Esther was concerned, I wouldn’t be here. What did you mean?” Fiona’s face turned red, almost a shade as bright as her hair. “She’s coming back to the area, isn’t she?”
Fiona yanked her hand out of his grip. “Let the past remain where it belongs. I’ve said too much already.”
“Does she ask about me?”
“No.”
“I see. So what you’re saying is that she’s moved on and I shouldn’t bother trying to get in touch with her?”
“You’d be doing yourself a favor.”
It was apparent he wouldn’t be getting any further information from Fiona, but that didn’t mean he couldn’t find out any on his own. “Okay, if you say so.”
“It was nice seeing you again, Matthias. You take care.” She walked away from him then.
Matthias thought that this conversation would give him the closure that he’d sought but instead it only managed to expose his true feelings for Esther. And that truth was, he’d never stopped thinking about or loving her. And now that she was free, he wouldn’t rest until they were reunited.
Chapter Nine
As Esther pulled into Fiona’s driveway, she had mixed feelings returning to the town she was forced to leave three years ago. While she was excited about seeing Fiona again and the opportunity to take her business to the next level, a part of her dreaded being surrounded by memories of what might have been.
Since Mike had died, not only had she spent her time trying to pick up the pieces of her life through meditation and a plethora of self-help books, she had put all her remaining time into building her business. That should have given her little time to think about Matthias. Being parted from him had been devastating. It was in those darkest hours when she hoped that she would see him again. But eventually, as she found a way to rely on herself, she realized she was better off on her own. She had too many demons to fight. She couldn’t involve him in that. He probably wanted nothing to do with her anyway. They hadn’t parted on the best terms.
