by L E May
The fact was that Steven was an excellent worker, he had a lot of potential, and would be snapped up by any of the major games developers and I wanted to keep him, not just because of my attraction to him but because I could see him being a major part of the expansion of Inspired. I was worried that the new staff might not respect him if he was an intern, but as I had grown to trust him a lot I imagined he would be the first person I would approach with new projects, and to discuss new ideas. Would that seem odd to other staff? It certainly put him in a much more vital position than an intern.
Besides which, I was sick of writing monitoring reports for his internship coordinators. I thought if I could give him a promotion, it would relieve me of that added annoyance. There was also the fact that he was good with people and would be a great poster boy for the company, representing us at conferences. I tried not to think too much about a poster of Steven on my wall, smiling down at me while I slept.
He’d shown great initiative so far with the project he had taken over from me, his time management was fantastic, always exceeding his goals, the current app was well ahead of schedule, and the client was very pleased with what he had seen so far. I realised that it was going to be my job to bring in the work and to make decisions about the in-house games and apps we worked on. I needed to make sure that I had someone I could trust to oversee production and someone I could trust with my own ideas. Was Steven too young, too inexperienced to be given such responsibility? Could I really trust him or was my judgement clouded by my attraction too him? I’ve never been very good at sharing my work, getting the opinion of others, I’m always worried it will be dismissed as not good enough. I found it easy to talk to Steven about my ideas. He understood where I was coming from, recognised my vision, and suggested ideas that complemented and developed my original concept. We worked well together, and as this was a huge step for me, taking on staff, handing over my work and my ideas for others to make reality, I needed someone I trusted to work with first. But that almost suggested a management position and I wondered if his age was a problem. But then, I was hardly experienced in management. I had my position purely because I owned the business.
I wondered how other companies operated. They probably had all kinds of departments, lots of different specialists working on their own area. Or they were small like me, working on small apps on their own. I was trying to move us into a larger arena but I still wanted to retain my small-scale operation.
It was an exciting time, I had several ideas in various stages of development that I was keen to work on but client commissions came first. With more staff, I could delegate that work out and concentrate on both bringing in more clients and developing my own apps and games.
My mind wandered to Chris Knight. I hadn’t heard from him since Friday night but I’d certainly thought about him. He was a mystery, I wasn’t even sure what he looked like, although I felt fairly sure he was the guy in the photo with Steven, but I felt an attraction towards him. I knew it was unlikely we would ever meet but I had lost several hours imagining us meeting, falling into each other’s arms and making love, slowly, passionately. I knew he was fit, I assumed as a fitness instructor working in a gym he had to be and I imagined him being tall, muscular like an Olympic swimmer or gymnast.
A commotion outside my office roused me from my thoughts. I heard the door burst open and I recognised Dave’s voice apologising to Steven. I heard a frantic, angry female voice shouting and heard Steven’s voice rising, sounding frustrated. I marched to the door and flung it open. ‘What the fuck is going on?’ I shouted loud enough to drown out all the other raised voices, silencing them, all three faces turned towards me. I surveyed the scene before me, Dave was looking uncomfortable, stood in the doorway of the office. Steven looked tired, his short-sleeved shirt was crumpled and the top buttons were undone revealing a small smattering of chest hair. His hair, normally carefully styled, was flopped across one side of his head obscuring his left eye. His shoulders sagged and he looked deflated and ashamed, his face was already red, angry, but now he was calming and he just seemed embarrassed. Dave looked relieved that someone was taking control of the situation, he was such a nice guy, always supporting everyone, but he found it hard to be assertive and stand up to people. Finally, my eyes fell on the girl – slim, attractive, well dressed. She looked rich, well groomed. She was wearing tight-fitting jeans, high-heeled shoes, and a silk vest. She wore a camel coloured, soft leather jacket and her hair was scooped over on one side and secured with a band, cascading across her right shoulder in a soft curl. Dave had hold of her upper arm, apparently trying to hold her back. Her expression was hard to read. She looked at me and a look of triumph flashed across her eyes. Melissa.
‘Well?’ I demanded. ‘What do you want?’
Her eyes narrowed and she watched me, a small smirk tugging at one corner of her mouth, then her eyes flickered across to Steven and she nodded her head towards him.
‘I came to tell him that I’m pregnant.’ She announced, her eyes flashed with a challenge to me, daring me to argue with her. I couldn’t tell what she was thinking, she didn’t look upset, she looked victorious. Was this a trick? Had this been her plan all along; to tie him to her? Was she really so desperate to be with him that she would resort to such measures? I felt sickened by her actions, but I also felt sorry for her, being content to trick a man into being with her, a man who clearly didn’t want her. I forced myself to look at Steven. His face was ashen, drained of his earlier rage and numb with shock. He was staring at her, defeated, confused, and sad. He glanced at me, and seeing me looking at him, his face flushed. I gestured to Dave and he nodded, releasing his grip on Melissa and backing out of the room. I followed him, closing the door behind me without a backward glance.
I was drained by the time I got home, and decided to treat myself to a takeaway. I convinced myself it wouldn’t hurt for one night and I needed cheering up with comfort food. I didn’t care how many calories pizza cost – I was getting one anyway!
I opened up the laptop and saw Chris Knight was online. Good, I needed distracting after the bombshell Melissa had dropped earlier that day. I still couldn’t believe it. Dave had been really kind; he knew how I felt and I was kicking myself for not heeding Steven’s words about snapping him up before someone else did. I’d missed my chance like an idiot. Dave had said, ‘if someone else is able to snap him up then he wasn’t meant to be yours after all and it’s best to know now before you’re too involved.’ I knew he was right but it felt so disappointing. It was just so frustrating. There was no question of him not doing the right thing, he was too good a guy not to, old fashioned to an extent, but how galling to be forced into a marriage with someone he doesn’t even like. He had been right when he’d said she would never leave him alone. Now she had exactly what she wanted. It wouldn’t have made any difference if I’d snapped him up when he told me to, the damage had already been done. I wondered if he’d have left me to do the right thing by her then and knew deep down he would have to. I wanted him to be that sort of a man, but I didn’t want him to be that sort of a man for her. Dave was right, at least I’d saved myself that heartache.
Olivia Jones: So, you’re pretty frustrating yourself. Leaving me dangling like that, I couldn’t get to sleep at all last night.
Chris Knight: Is that all it takes to excite you Liv? Goodness, you’re in for a treat.
Olivia Jones: I am? But not all men have your prowess surely? I mean wouldn’t I have had some satisfaction by now if it was more common?
Chris Knight: Good point, but maybe you’ve just been unlucky.
Olivia Jones: Or maybe it’s my fault for being a little prudish.
Chris Knight: Well we’ll get you over your fears and then you can enjoy some good sex. ;-)
Olivia Jones: When was the last time you spoke to Steven?
It occurred to me suddenly that Steven might need a friend. It had been difficult when I returned to the office. I watched Melissa leave, lookin
g triumphant in her conquest, happy to be ruining Steven’s life, denying him a life filled with love.
Steven was slumped on the sofa in my office, his arm across his eyes. I’d perched on the edge of the sofa and touched his arm to let him know I was there. He didn’t say anything for a long time until he eventually asked if he could take the rest of the week off. He said he needed some time to think. I flushed with a warm glow when he said;
‘She’s turned me into the type of man I never wanted to be; I’m not the sort of guy that has sex in public toilets, and I’m not the sort of man that doesn’t face up to my responsibilities and do the right thing. She somehow made me do the first point and right now she’s making me want to walk away. I mean fuck her, I hate her. But I don’t know if my conscience will let me just abandon her. But I look at you and I want to, I want to just tell her to go to hell. You know how I feel about you, Ols, but I have to work out what to do for the best, what’s the right thing to do, and I can’t do that around you.’
I had been unsure how he felt, whether he still wanted me and now I knew, now it was too late. I had just nodded and made my way back to my desk, leaving him free to head home.
Chris Knight: Yeah, he emailed me earlier. Fucking Melissa!
Olivia Jones: Did you know her at uni?
Chris Knight: Yeah, she made herself known. She was always hanging around the bar when Steven was working. She had something of an obsession with him. But she’s not to be trusted. There’s more to Melissa than meets the eye. I thought it then and I still think it now.
Olivia Jones: What do you mean?
Chris Knight: I can’t prove anything, it’s just a feeling, maybe it’s wishful thinking, I just think there’s an ulterior motive here. Steven’s a good-looking guy, but he’s a nerd and he’s going to attract a particular type of woman – sure beautiful women might want him until he opens his mouth and starts blinding them with geek speak, then they’ll just lose interest thinking ‘such a shame that someone so handsome is so dull’. Melissa is pretty but she’s after something, her ambitions are much bigger than settling down and playing happy families with Steven.
Olivia Jones: But what else could she be doing?
Chris Knight: I wish I knew.
I tried to reply but for some reason my keyboard stopped responding. I couldn’t believe it, I was just learning something interesting about this whole mess and I couldn’t respond. I restarted the laptop but when I restarted it I got the black screen warning me that the computer hadn’t been shut down properly and asking me to choose whether to start up as normal or in safe mode. The keyboard wouldn’t respond. Completely dead. I couldn’t believe it. I screamed and slammed the lid shut and threw a cushion at it. That’ll show it!
I picked up my phone and left a status on Facebook, hoping Chris would see it and understand my sudden disappearance. Laptop just died, guess I’m going laptop shopping tomorrow.
Chris replied instantly. Get one with a webcam.
Am I finally going to get to see the anonymous Chris Knight? A fizz of excitement jolted through me, followed immediately by butterflies.
Chapter Seventeen
By Wednesday, I was miserable in the office. I stood by the kitchenette waiting for the kettle to boil and stared forlornly at his desk. I missed him. Funny to think only a few weeks ago I was plotting ways to get him out of the office so I could have some peace, and now that he had been away for two days, I was missing him. The office seemed empty and quiet without his usual carefree banter.
As I was stirring my tea, I heard the door open and, turning, I saw Dave pop his head around the door frame.
‘Hi, Dave, how are you?’ I asked warmly. I’d not spoken to Dave since Monday when we had left Steven and Melissa to talk.
‘Hey, Olly, I’m good, just wanted to pass your post in,’ he replied handing me a pile of letters and packages. ‘Popular this week.’ He smiled.
‘Yes, job applications. Advert went out last week.’ I explained, nodding.
‘Any word from Steven?’
I shook my head, my sad smile frozen in place.
‘He’ll be back in on Monday.’
‘Well, what will be, will be. Don’t let it get you down.’ He smiled reassuringly and patted my arm before leaving.
I took my post and my cup of tea into my office and settled on the sofa. I had twelve job applications and three invoices. I piled them neatly on the coffee table and turned my attention to the package. It was addressed for my attention and, after the last parcel, I was relieved I was opening the post.
Inside the envelope was a blank DVD case with a sticky note attached saying:
‘The next lesson of your sex education.’
Inside the case was a blank DVD. There was nothing written on the disc to identify it. I was so curious I contemplated inserting the disc into my computer but I had a feeling it would contain material that should only be viewed in private and although I was alone in the office I didn’t want to risk anyone popping in to visit me. I threw the DVD into my bag and returned to my desk.
That evening I followed my new routine; turned the oven on, changed into my exercise clothes and spent twenty minutes working out. Finally, after I’d showered and eaten I opened up my bag and retrieved the disc.
I don’t know what I was expecting, but as it was from Chris, I knew it would be in some way highly embarrassing. And yet I was still surprised when I selected the first story and found myself watching porn.
The scene opened on a blue door, sunlight bouncing off the glossy paint. A tanned fist knocked on the door and a man was revealed, his dark hair brushed back off his face and few tendrils falling across his forehead. He wore dungarees, with no shirt underneath, showing off his muscles. The door opened to reveal a young woman, blonde hair piled on top of her head with curls escaping and falling down the back of her neck. She had a bath towel wrapped around her body, held in place by her hand. She was lean and tanned.
‘Someone call for a plumber?’ The guy asked smiling, revealing a perfect set of pearly white teeth. She stepped aside to let him in as she moved her eyes across the full length of his body. She led him upstairs to the bathroom, and leaned against the door.
‘I was taking a shower and the water just went cold.’ She explained, her hand still holding the towel fastened at her chest but her fingers idly stroking her breast as she spoke. The plumber glanced at the filled bath.
‘The bath water is hot?’ He asked surprised.
‘No, I boiled some pans of water.’ She moved towards the bath and dropped her towel, ‘You don’t mind if I take a bath while you work do you? I have to get ready.’
He shook his head as she stepped into the bath, moaning as the warm water covered her.
She lathered some soap in her hand and proceeded to wash her breasts. He stopped to watch her for a while, his hand moving to stroke his penis through his clothes. She noticed him watching her and stopped.
‘Why don’t you join me?’ She asked, her voice heavy with longing.
He unclipped his braces, letting his dungarees fall to the floor, and stepped out of them and over to the bath. He sat on the edge, his legs in the water. She turned onto her knees to face him, running her hands up his thighs and her tongue up the length of his considerable erection. She sucked him into her mouth, her lips moving right down to the base and slowly back to the tip, teasing him with her tongue and sucking him back in to the back of her throat. On and on this continued, his hands weaving into her hair, directing the rhythm of her movement.
He pulled out of her mouth, stood up, and lifted her into his arms and carried her out of the bathroom.
The scene changed, she lay on a large bed with black satin sheets, her feet dangling over the edge as he kneeled between her knees, his tongue running slowly up and down her clitoris, she was moaning seductively as he inserted fingers inside her. Fingers – plural!
I couldn’t even imagine that much attention being paid to me down there. I watched fascinat
ed as he flipped her over onto her knees pulling her backside towards him and plunging himself inside her, thrusting deeper and deeper as the volume of her moans increased.
I became aware of a sensation building in my lower belly and a tingling in my crotch. I squirmed in my seat, tensing my thigh muscles and gently rotating my pelvis. My hand moved instinctively inside the waistband of my jeans and I felt a flush creep over my face as I realised what I was doing. But I didn’t care. I was masturbating to porn and it was hot.
On the screen the blonde girl was on her knees looking up at his huge erection as he moved his hand quickly up and down until his orgasm burst forth across her face. She opened her mouth, catching the drops and licking the juice from the tip of his penis as it gushed out.
My own orgasm shuddered through me as I watched, my hand slowing its pace as I squeezed every last bit of sensation out of my body.
I stared at the menu screen on the television, contemplating whether to watch more. I shook my head, bringing me back to my senses.
I couldn’t believe what was happening to me. I’d never been so easily aroused in my life, never so interested in sex, and yet lately it was all I could think about.
Chapter Eighteen
Five p.m. on Friday was welcomed with open arms. I was missing Steven and was worried about him, wondering what he was thinking, how he was feeling, and what he would do. I desperately wanted him to go against his instinct and tell Melissa she was on her own, but part of me wanted to know he was the type of man who did the right thing. I was already convinced he was lost to me, even though a small part of me was still hopeful. One thing I knew for certain was that if by some miracle he was still free when he returned next week I wouldn’t waste any more time wondering what I should do about my feelings for him. If he still wanted me, I was his. But sadly, I knew it was unlikely.
