by Shyla Colt
I suck his finger harder and tug at his nipple. He breathes harder.
“What are you waiting for, B? Ride your man’s cock.”
“Can you?”
“Feel it? Not the way I used to, but God, I feel something. It’s like the rest of my body has become a conduit to make up for it. Oh yeah, suck it like that.” He cups his base, and I sink down, whimpering as he fills me to the brim. I keep my feet planted as I move up and down, sucking and nibbling his fingers as I play with his nipples.
“Oh shit, it’s…it’s building.”
“Yes. Oh yes.” I move faster, so close to the edge.
He reaches between us and circles my clit. My pussy clamps down and I suck faster and tug his nipples harder. He lets out a roar that sends me over the edge. I shake as I come, hard. Exhausted, I slump against his shoulder.
“I thought I would never experience that with you again,” he admits.
“It was good?” I ask.
“Damn good, Blanche.” He slaps my ass, and I choke on a cry as my giggles turns to sobs.
“What’s wrong?”
“I’m s-s so happy,” I hiccup.
“My sweet girl.” he cups my chin and pulls me in, devouring my mouth as he squeezes the back of my neck, holding me in place. If I wasn’t ready to melt into a puddle, I am now. I want to stay here, but I know too much pressure on his legs for too long is never a good thing. I ease off his limp cock and relish the feel of his seed inside me. We’ve regained our intimacy and survived another blow in the battle to become us once more. I turn off the water, and step out, towel drying and feigning nonchalance as I watch him carefully exit the stall. My heart is bursting with pride and love. Slowly, but surely, he’s coming around.
***
“You want to tell me what’s on your mind?” I ask sitting back on my heels as I lower J’s leg.
“It’s been six months today, since the accident.”
“Is that why you’re only half invested in the workout today?” I ask silently fuming. Physically he’s doing great. His body is strong. He’s got excellent eating habits, a steady bathroom schedule, a plethora of knowledge and enough practice of everyday skills to allow him freedom. Mentally is where he’s lagging in development.
“I still can’t feel anything below the injury, B.”
“You thought you would by now?” I guess.
“I don’t know what I thought. Just not this.”
“What did Dr. Simmons say?” I know, but I like to make him work through the process on his own.
“It’s still early to make a call either way, but I may be at my full capability level feeling wise when it comes to my injury.”
“And does that change the fact that you need to keep your strength up?”
“No.”
“Then get your head into the workout,” I demand.
“You act like this is easy.”
“Have I ever said that, J?”
“No, but you’re unyielding.”
“No, I’m doing my job, and you’re still not ready to admit that this is your life now.”
“How could I ever forget?” He pushes up into a sitting position, and I crack my neck.
“That’s not what I meant, and you know it.”
“Then tell me what my problem is, B, please.”
I ignore the sarcasm dripping from his tongue. “You’re still holding back, waiting for what I don’t know. You have one foot in the present, and the other God knows where. You’re getting in the way of your own progress.”
“It’s so easy to sit on the other side of things and say that.” He becomes defensive.
“You either want to live the best life you can the way you are, or you don’t. I’m not here to force you to do anything. I thought I was trying to give you back your life—”
“How are you going to do that? Do you have a time machine or the cure for paraplegia?”
“And that’s the only way possible?”
He looks away.
“I know you’re disappointed, but lashing out isn’t going to help anything.”
“Lashing out. What you think I’m throwing some sort of tantrum?”
“Aren’t you?” she asks.
“No.”
“Looks suspiciously like a mantrum, but if you say it’s not, I guess you’d know.”
“What the hell do you want from me, woman?”
“For you to realize your life isn’t over just because you’re paralyzed. You’re far more capable than you give yourself credit for. We’ve been training to give you back independence, and believe me in six months you’ve come a long way. A lot further than most could’ve. You need to embrace life as who you are now. You haven’t even been to the club since you got back.”
“It’s not for me anymore.”
“It is, and it’s a huge part of what’s eating you up. You’ve given a massive chunk of your life to the Kings of Chaos, and now you’re acting like none of that matters. You still have a place with them.”
“I can’t ride!”
“And yet, they offered you a place as Treasure. No, you can’t ride, but you’re still a part of them. An important part, one of the inner circle which looks out for the club, keeping their money straight. Yet, you haven’t been there since you got back. I’m not the only one who noticed it either. It’s time you did some things on your own.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means get out of here, call up one of the brothers, and go hang out at the clubhouse by yourself. I’m not helping you with this one. You make the arrangement and deal with everything I spent the past few months teaching you.”
“Just like that?” His voice shakes.
Six months is not just like that. “Consider it homework.” I remain firm. As long as he continues to look to me for all the answers, and constant reassurance. He has to fly on his own and reclaim his identity. I see bits and pieces of him. I refuse to enable him. My next step is to get him a car with hand controls, but he has to get used to being out by himself first. My Spidey senses say it’s time to cut the cord.
“It’s Friday, though.”
“Perfect day to spend with you boys without me.”
“What will you be doing?”
“Bubble bath, wine, and a good book.”
“But—”
“Jagger, it’s time. Okay?”
He clears his throat. “Alright. I’ll ugh. I’ll call Warp and see if he can pick me up.”
I grunt as I push myself up, and hold out my hand. “You do this, and we’ll move on to the next stage.”
“What’s that?”
“Walking with braces.”
“Wait. How?”
“You’ll be using the upper strength we’ve been helping you build up. Why do you think I’ve been pushing you so hard?”
“Because you’re an evil ass woman who gets off on my pain?”
I arch a brow. “Really?”
“You’re two people in my head, My B, and then my Trainer. I will break you.” He mimes the Russian wife from Rocky, and I laugh. He gets off the table and into his wheelchair.
I feel a prickling of anxiety. This is his first time flying solo. But it’s a safe environment. He’s ready. Even Obi-Wan had to let Anakin go. And look at how that turned out. He turned to face me.
“I should go get dressed and put my cut on too.”
“Yes, you should.” The nervous excitement audible in his voice, and sparkle in his eyes warms me from the inside out. He’s going to be just fine. I repeat that to myself in a chant as I leave the room.
An hour later I’m answering the door.
“You finally letting him out?”
“Look. You don’t like me, fine. I really couldn’t care less, but you need to play nice and be the famil
y member Jagger sees you as. This whole event has been traumatic, and he’s trying to find his feet again so to speak. Discord between us will only slow down that process. I’ve spent the past six months teaching him how to live independently with his disability. This is his first trip out. Look after him, or I’ll show you what a bitch I can really be.”
His eyebrows arch up, and he opens his mouth to respond.
“Warp. Man, it’s good to see you.”
Saved by the Old Man. I step back and smile at the sight of him in his jeans, white and black shoes, and his cut.
“Shit man, you about to audition for an action role?”
Jagger laughs. “The Old Lady’a been working my ass off. Believe me, I ain’t been on vacation. You ready to get out of here?”
Warp looks at me with an unreadable expression on his face. “Yeah, we’ll be back tonight, or maybe not. He’s still got his dorm.”
I hold my hands. “I’m off duty. I’m just an Old Lady right now.” I wink at Jagger, bend down and kiss him breathless. The spark burns brightly between us. We also spent the past six months discovering new ways to love one another. I step back and wiggle my fingers.
“Have fun, honey.”
“You too.”
He wheels out behind Warp with confidence that comes from practice. I close the door and peek out the curtain as he puts the seat back, places his transfer car, and uses the handle in the car as leverage to pull his body onto the seat. He places his legs inside and turns to disassemble his bike for Warp to store. I jump up and down doing a silly dance as joy rockets through me. The men have done a great job of stopping by, shooting the shit, and coming to dinner, but this is special. He’s returning to his element.
The car pulls out of the driveway, and I move to turn on cheesy nineties pop music and catch up with Whitney. She choose to attend summer semester. I’ve been so busy with caring for Jagger we’ve taken to scheduling our phone conversations and face time.
I plop onto the couch ready to enjoy some much-needed downtime and avoid worrying about Jagger.
Chapter Sixteen
Freeze
Why the hell didn’t I do this before now? All my concerns about not fitting in seem stupid now that I’m seated at the table with Warp, Shadow, Skull, and Stone.
“It’s damn good to see you here, brother,” Stone said.
“It’s good to be here.”
“That bitch had you holed up.”
I clutch my beer. “You ever disrespect her again, and we’re going to have a problem. I owe that woman everything. We weren’t in the house playing grab ass. She was whipping me back into shape. You have no idea all the things you have to relearn when you lose the use of your legs. I ain’t been the most pleasant person to deal with, and yet, she brushes it off and tells me to suck it up. She’s the reason I’m going to walk again. It won’t be on my own power. It’ll be with leg braces, but I don’t give a shit. When you insult her, you’re pissing on me.”
“Shit man, I’m sorry.” Warp holds his hands up. “I didn’t realize.”
“Now you do.”
Stone places a hand on my shoulder and pinches. “Blanche is good people. I think we can all agree on that.”
“How you doing with…everything?” Shadow asks.
This was the moment I dreaded where my differences become apparent. “I’m as good as I can be. The Doc is happy with my progress, and I have a walking encyclopedia of knowledge with me daily.”
“What kind of things does she have you doing?” Skull asks.
“Think of her as a fitness trainer. Weights, strength building, things like that.”
“Yeah, I can tell. You’re freaking swoll dude,” Skull says gesturing toward my upper body.
I chuckle.
“Hey, Freeze.”
I glance up to see two King chasers in skimpy outfits. The long legs, fake racks, and heavily made up faces do nothing for me.
“Shanna, Emily, good to see you.”
“How about we welcome you back properly?”
I cringe. They wouldn’t find my urine bag very hot.
“I’m good girls.”
They scowl and walk off.
“Really?” Warp says.
“I’m getting everything I need taken care of at home.” I shrug. “Now are we going to play Dominos or what?”
“Oh, you’re eager to lose some money?” Warp asks.
“No, but I’m ready to take yours,” I say.
“Oh, big words. Put your money where your mouth is,” Warp says.
We fall back into the easy rhythm. I’m on my second game when my alarm vibrates on my phone.
“I’ll be back, gotta hit the head.” I unlock the breaks, slip on my gloves, unlock the breaks, and pull away from the table. People wave and nod as I make my way to my old dorm. I unlock the door, hit the light and maneuver my way inside. It smells stale. I lock the door behind me and wheel to the bathroom. I undo my belt and get my boxers and jeans down. Taking care of the urine bag is second nature to me now, but I sure as hell don’t want my brothers knowing about it. I finish up, flush, and wash my hands. So far so good. I’m getting sick of telling B, she’s right, but this was what I needed. I been too dependent on her. Away from the situation, I can see reality for what it is.
The desire to see her flares up inside me. I want to do something special for her. How do you thank the person you owe your life to because I’m sure without B, I would’ve given up. It’s time to make things official. I return to the table and finish my final game.
“Hey, Warp, can I get a ride home?”
“Sure, brother. You don’t want to stay the night?”
“Naw, I got something waiting for me,” I say with a grin.
“Hah, be careful that look landed me with twins,” Skull mumbles.
“Be alright with that. Don’t know about B, since she just sent her oldest to college.” The truth of the words slam into me like a sledgehammer. I want a family with her. I lost a lot, but my vision for the future is clear.
“Starting over after you just reach the out of the house age would be hard,” Stone said.
“I don’t know man. I’ve seen the way she looks at you. I think she’d be alright with it,” Shadow says.
Warp scowls. “He’s got that new parent fever. Thinks everyone else should have them too.”
“Kids are cool, Warp. You’re not too old to have a few yet,” Shadow says.
“Fuck you, don’t you put that curse on me.” Warp flips him off, and I laugh. “Let me get you home, the talk at the table is making me antsy.”
I follow him out to the parking lot, and he pauses.
“I can see your Old Lady’s done right by you. I apologize for insulting her.”
“I appreciate it, brother.”
“Well, she’s family, right?”
“Yeah, the best kind, man. The forever kind.” I get myself into the car and break down the chair.
“You’re pretty good at that, brother.”
“All thanks to B. I hated her guts there for a minute. I really did. It hurt. I wanted to quit and drown in the depression that hit. But she wouldn’t let me.” It’s easier to be open with Warp.
“Damn, dude.” He returns the wheelchair to the trunk.
He slips into the car, and I continue to talk.
“The thought of not riding broke me. She showed me there was more to me than my bike, and then you guys offered me the Treasurer position.”
“When you thinking about taking it? Soon?”
“Yeah, I think so. I think it’s time I took the rest of my life back and returned B’s to her.” In order for this to work long term, we need more separation. I can give that to her now. I feel more like me than I have since the accident. Like past and present are merging and I can see the road ahead of me.
We pull up in front of the house.
“Just pull the chair from the back for me, and I got it from here. I ain’t your date. You don’t have to walk me to the front door.”
“Good to have you back, Freeze.”
“Good to be back.” He sets my chair down, and I quickly assemble, exit, and remove the transfer cloth.
“Thanks for the ride brother, I’ll see you soon.” I quickly wheel up to the front door and unlock it. Even the lock is just the right height for me. Damn my woman put so much into making this house a home. I wheel inside, lock the door, and engage the alarm.
“J?”
Blanch walks into the view clutching the rose covered robe around her. I lick my lips.
“Yeah, B. It’s just me. So you can drop those hands and let me see what’s mine.”
Her mouth forms an o. Her eyes darken, and her chest heaves. She drops her hands and reveals a long sliver of brown skin.
“I been neglecting you, not giving it to you like you’re used to. That stops now. Get your ass on that table,” I whisper.
She shudders and walks over to the kitchen where she splays her beautiful frame.
I wheel down to her and set the break. “You’re a goddess among women. I can’t thank you with words for all you’ve done for me. I’m done thinking about the past and wondering what if. I got everything I want right here.” I slid my hand up her body and marvel at the smooth skin. “So damn beautiful and all mine. I’m ready for you to take my mark. I don’t need a year to know you’re the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. I part her legs, kiss her ankle and work my way up. I linger on her thick thighs.
“Oh, Jagger.”
“That’s right. Daddy’s back, baby, and he’s going to make up for lost time.”
I nibble and lick her sensitive flesh as I inhale her arousal. I pull myself up with my arms, and cage her in, placing an arm on either side of her. She spread her legs wider to fit my shoulders, and I lick a path up her wet slit as I nudge her clit with my nose. She tugs on my braid. The jolt of pain makes me moan as I latch onto her bundle of nerves and drink her nectar. I plunge my tongue inside her and she contracts. I groan. She rides my face, and I fuck her the way I can no longer feel with other parts of me, and it’s enough. To feel our connection as she finds her pleasure and splinters around me is a gift.
