Praise for Jenn McKinlay’s New York Times Bestselling Cupcake Bakery Mysteries
Sugar and Iced
“Top-notch . . . I absolutely can’t get enough of the Cupcake Bakery Mysteries!”
—Cozy Mystery Book Reviews
Going, Going, Ganache
“Good plotting and carefully placed clues make this an enjoyable, light mystery, made a little sweeter with recipes for the cupcakes Mel’s team creates.”
—The Mystery Reader
Red Velvet Revenge
“You’re in for a real treat with Jenn McKinlay’s Cupcake Bakery Mystery. I gobbled it right up.”
—Julie Hyzy, New York Times bestselling author of the White House Chef mysteries
“Sure as shootin’, Red Velvet Revenge pops with fun and great twists. Wrangle up some time to enjoy the atmosphere of a real rodeo as well as family drama. It’s better than icing on the tastiest cupcake.”
—Avery Aames, Agatha Award–winning author of the Cheese Shop Mysteries
Death by the Dozen
“It’s the best yet, with great characters and a terrific, tightly written plot.”
—Lesa’s Book Critiques
Buttercream Bump Off
“A charmingly entertaining story paired with a luscious assortment of cupcake recipes that, when combined, made for a deliciously thrilling mystery.”
—Fresh Fiction
“Another tasty entry, complete with cupcake recipes, into what is sure to grow into a perennial favorite series.”
—The Mystery Reader
Sprinkle with Murder
“A tender cozy full of warm and likable characters and a refreshingly sympathetic murder victim. Readers will look forward to more of McKinlay’s tasty concoctions.”
—Publishers Weekly (starred review)
“Jenn McKinlay delivers all the ingredients for a winning read. Frost me another!”
—Cleo Coyle, New York Times bestselling author of the Coffeehouse Mysteries
“A delicious new series featuring a spirited heroine, luscious cupcakes, and a clever murder. Jenn McKinlay has baked a sweet read.”
—Krista Davis, New York Times bestselling author of the Domestic Diva Mysteries
Praise for the Library Lover’s Mysteries
Book, Line, and Sinker
“[A] delightfully charming series.”
—Dru’s Book Musings
Due or Die
“[A] terrific addition to an intelligent, fun, and lively series.”
—Miranda James, New York Times bestselling author of the Cat in the Stacks Mysteries
“What a great read! . . . A winning formula.”
—Library Journal
Books Can Be Deceiving
“A sparkling setting, lovely characters, books, knitting, and chowder! What more could any reader ask?”
—Lorna Barrett, New York Times bestselling author of the Booktown Mysteries
“Is sure to charm cozy readers everywhere.”
—Ellery Adams, New York Times bestselling author of the Books by the Bay Mysteries
“Fast-paced and fun . . . An endearing protagonist, delightful characters, a lovely New England setting, and a fascinating murder.”
—Kate Carlisle, New York Times bestselling author of the Bibliophile Mysteries
Praise for the Hat Shop Mysteries
Cloche and Dagger
“A delicious romp through my favorite part of London with a delightful new heroine.”
—Deborah Crombie, New York Times bestselling author of the Kincade/James novels
“Brimming with McKinlay’s trademark wit and snappy one-liners, Anglophiles will love this thoroughly entertaining new murder mystery series. A hat trick of love, laughter, and suspense, and another feather in [Jenn McKinlay’s] cap.”
—Hannah Dennison, author of the Vicky Hill Exclusive! Mysteries
“Fancy hats and British aristocrats make this my sort of delicious cozy read.”
—Rhys Bowen, New York Times bestselling author of the Royal Spyness Mysteries
Berkley Prime Crime titles by Jenn McKinlay
Cupcake Bakery Mysteries
SPRINKLE WITH MURDER
BUTTERCREAM BUMP OFF
DEATH BY THE DOZEN
RED VELVET REVENGE
GOING, GOING, GANACHE
SUGAR AND ICED
DARK CHOCOLATE DEMISE
Library Lover’s Mysteries
BOOKS CAN BE DECEIVING
DUE OR DIE
BOOK, LINE, AND SINKER
READ IT AND WEEP
ON BORROWED TIME
Hat Shop Mysteries
CLOCHE AND DAGGER
DEATH OF A MAD HATTER
AT THE DROP OF A HAT
THE BERKLEY PUBLISHING GROUP
Published by the Penguin Group
Penguin Group (USA) LLC
375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014
USA • Canada • UK • Ireland • Australia • New Zealand • India • South Africa • China
penguin.com
A Penguin Random House Company
DARK CHOCOLATE DEMISE
A Berkley Prime Crime Book / published by arrangement with the author
Copyright © 2015 by Jennifer McKinlay Orf.
Excerpt from A Likely Story by Jenn McKinlay copyright © 2015 by Jennifer McKinlay Orf.
Penguin supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin to continue to publish books for every reader.
Berkley Prime Crime Books are published by The Berkley Publishing Group,
BERKLEY® PRIME CRIME and the PRIME CRIME logo are registered trademarks of Penguin Group (USA) LLC.
For information, address: The Berkley Publishing Group,
a division of Penguin Group (USA) LLC,
375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014.
eBook ISBN: 978-0-698-18653-8
PUBLISHING HISTORY
Berkley Prime Crime mass-market edition / April 2015
Cover illustration by Jeff Fitz-Maurice.
Cover design by Lesley Worrell.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
PUBLISHER’S NOTE: The recipes contained in this book are to be followed exactly as written. The publisher is not responsible for your specific health or allergy needs that may require medical supervision. The publisher is not responsible for any adverse reactions to the recipes contained in this book.
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For two of my favorite dudes, Austin McKinlay and Phoenix McKinlay. It’s a beautiful thing when an aunt gets nephews as wonderful as you. It is a joy to have you in my life. I am so proud of the amazing people you are becoming. Love you always!
Contents
Praise for Jenn McKinlay
Berkley Prime Crime titles by Jenn McKinlay
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Cha
pter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-one
Chapter Twenty-two
Chapter Twenty-three
Chapter Twenty-four
Chapter Twenty-five
Chapter Twenty-six
Chapter Twenty-seven
Chapter Twenty-eight
Chapter Twenty-nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-one
Chapter Thirty-two
Recipes
Preview of A Likely Story
One
“He looks really good in there,” Angie DeLaura said. “Peaceful even.”
“You can’t say that about everyone,” Melanie Cooper agreed.
“It’s all about the casket,” Tate Harper said. “You want to choose a lining that complements your skin tone in the postmortem.”
Mel and Angie turned and gave him concerned looks.
“How could you possibly know that?” Mel asked.
“The funeral director at the mortuary told me,” he said. He threw an arm around Angie. “Since we’re engaged and all, maybe we should pick out a double-wide so we can spend eternity snuggling.”
Angie beamed at him and giggled. Then she kissed him. It did not maintain its PG-13 rating for more than a moment, and Mel felt her upchuck reflex kick in as she turned away.
She was happy for her best friends in their coupledom, really she was, but sometimes, like now, it was just gag worthy.
“Really you two, how about a little decorum, given the gravity of the situation?” she asked. She knew she sounded a bit snippy but honestly, some days they were just too much.
“Of course, you’re right,” Tate said. “Sorry.”
He and Angie untangled themselves from each other. He smoothed the front of his shirt and straightened his jacket while Angie fluffed her hair and shook out her skirt. Duly subdued, the three of them stood beside the casket that held their friend and employee Marty Zelaznik.
Marty looked particularly spiffy in his white dress shirt and his favorite bold blue tie. His suit was black, and Angie had tucked a blue pocket square into his breast pocket so that just the edge of it was visible. His features were relaxed and his bald head was as shiny as if it had been waxed to a high gloss.
“Hey.” Oscar Ruiz, a teen known as Oz, who worked alongside Marty in the bakery Fairy Tale Cupcakes that Mel, Angie, and Tate owned, joined the trio by the casket. “So, we’re going with an open lid, huh?”
“We think it’s for the best,” Mel said.
“His tie is crooked,” Angie said. “We should fix that.”
“Yeah, and his makeup is a little on the heavy side,” Tate said. “He has angry eyebrows.”
“Anyone have a handkerchief?” Mel asked. “A little spit will take care of that.”
At this, Marty’s eyes popped open and he sat up in his coffin and glared. “What am I, five? You are not spit shining me!”
“Ah!” Angie yelped and leaped back with her hand clutching her chest. “Gees, Marty, you scared me to death!”
“Nice one.” Tate laughed as he and Oz high-fived and knuckle-bumped Marty.
“What? Did you think I was really dead?” Marty asked, sounding outraged.
“No!” Angie snapped. “I thought you were napping. You had a little drool in the corner of your mouth.”
“I was, but that doesn’t mean you get to swab my decks,” Marty said as he shifted around and rubbed the dried spittle off his chin. “You know, I have to say it’s pretty comfy in here. I may have to look into putting a deposit on one of these for the future.”
“Way in the future,” Mel said.
Marty glanced at the four of them. “So when do we leave for the zombie walk? I want to catch a few more Z’s. Oh, and by the way, the undead look you’ve all got going, yeah, I don’t want to wake up to that ever again.”
Mel glanced at her friends. Tate and Angie were doing the undead bride and groom. In requisite tux and white wedding gown, they had topped off their look with gray makeup and faux partially rotted flesh. Tate had a fake knife lodged in his skull, while Angie had an axe sticking out of her back. They had already taken bogus wedding photos that Angie was seriously considering making their official wedding portrait.
Being single and thinking this was going to become a permanent state, Mel had decided to go as an undead chef complete with her toque, double-breasted white coat, and checkered pants. She wore her pleated hat back on her head to enhance the amazing latex scar Oz had adhered to her forehead. It was pretty badass.
Oz had decided to wear his chef whites as well, but had changed it up by making the side of his face appear to be rotting off. Every time Mel saw his fake putrid skin flap in the breeze, she had to resist the urge to peel it off.
As the body in the casket, Marty had chosen to be less undead than the rest of them. He was pasty pale and sunken eyed but that was about it. Mel suspected that because he was closer to his actual expiration date than the rest of them, dressing up as a dead man had less appeal for him. Overall, she had to admit, they were fabulously gruesome.
“Sorry, Marty, but no napping,” Mel said. She grabbed him by the elbow and hauled him out of the casket, which was sitting on a trailer on the back of the cupcake van. “We’ve got to load up the van and get over to the Civic Center Park and set up our station before the undead descend upon us.”
“Ooh, that sounded nice and grisly.” Angie shuddered.
“It did, didn’t it?” Mel said. She let go of Marty, ignoring the look of longing he gave the coffin. “Let’s move, people.”
She hurried to the back of the bakery, where she’d left her rolling cart loaded with boxes of cupcakes. She pushed it alongside the service window of the van and began to hand them off to Oz, who was inside.
“What flavors did you create for zombie cupcakes?” Tate asked.
“No new flavors,” Mel said. She flipped open the lid of one of the boxes to show off the cupcakes. “Just new names. In place of the usual suspects we have the Marshmallow Mummy—”
“Hey, you made the frosting look like bandages on a mummy’s head,” Oz said from the window. “Cool.”
“And it has a marshmallow filling,” Mel said. “We also have Vanilla Eyeballs, Strawberry Brains, and Dark Chocolate Demise just to round out the flavors.”
“The eyeball one is staring at me,” Marty said. “I don’t think I could eat that.”
“How about the brains?” Tate said. “How did you pipe the frosting in the shape of a pink brain?”
“Fine pastry tip,” Angie said. “It was fun.”
“Are those little candy coffins on the chocolate ones?” Oz asked. “I dig those. Get it?”
“Aw, man, that stunk worse than rotting flesh,” Marty said. He closed the lid on the box, took it from Mel, and handed it through the window. The others stared at him and he asked, “What? I’m just getting into the spirit of things.”
“Fine, but please keep the rotten flesh remarks to a minimum when selling the cupcakes,” Mel said.
“This from the woman who ruined a perfectly good cupcake by putting a bloodshot eyeball on it,” he said. He shook his head as if he couldn’t fathom what she’d been thinking.
Mel lowered her head to keep from laughing. She didn’t want to offend Marty, as he took his vanilla cupcakes very seriousl
y.
“Melanie!” a voice called from the bakery. Mel glanced up to see her mother, Joyce Cooper, stride out the door. Joyce took three steps and stopped, putting her hand to her throat. “Oh, my!”
“We look amazing, right?” Mel asked. She spread her arms wide to include her entire crew.
“What are you?” Joyce asked.
“The baking dead,” Oz said from the van.
“Niiiice.” Tate nodded.
“Yeah, I’ll give you that one,” Marty agreed and exchanged a complicated handshake with Oz.
Mel approached her mother, who flinched only a little when she drew near. “Thanks for watching the bakery so we could work the zombie walk, Mom.”
“No problem,” Joyce said. “But, honey, really I just have to say that white foundation you have on, well, it’s really not terribly flattering, and now that you’re single, you really might want to consider a little blush and maybe a less prominent eye shadow.”
“I’m supposed to look like a zombie,” Mel said. “I’m pretty sure they don’t wear blush or eye shadow.”
“Lipstick?”
“No,” Mel said.
Joyce heaved a beleaguered sigh, turned and walked back into the bakery.
“Really?” Mel said to Angie. “She’s worried about my pasty foundation, but she blithely ignores the fact that I have a gaping wound on my head.”
“She’s just looking out for you,” Angie said. “Maybe you’ll meet a nice undead lawyer at the zombie walk and she’ll stop worrying.”
“There’s only one lawyer I’m interested in,” Mel said. “And as far as I know he is alive and kicking.”
Angie gave her a half hug as if trying to bolster her spirits. The love of Mel’s life was Joe DeLaura, the middle of Angie’s seven older brothers. A few months ago, Joe had rejected Mel’s proposal of marriage even though he had already proposed to her and she’d said yes. As Mel explained to her mother, it was complicated.
The truth was that Mel had gotten cold feet at the “until death us do part” portion of the whole marriage package, but she had worked through it. Unfortunately, when she had gotten over her case of the wiggins and proposed to Joe, he’d just taken on the trial of a notorious mobster, who was known for wriggling off justice’s barbed hook by murdering anyone who tried to lock him up.
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