It could also potentially cause more problems since she’d learn even more. And I still couldn’t completely trust her. Not yet.
When I’d broached another solution with Beylore, of using Riftborn magic to help with the situation, I’d gotten an earful. I should’ve known better than to bring up such a sensitive subject.
“We only did that once, and you know how I feel about it, Alexander Bane. Even if you do it with the best intentions, who’s to say that it wouldn’t make things worse? I’m not doing it again—unless Winfyre is on the brink of collapse, like it was, before.” Lor’s face had twisted with pain. “Ever think maybe Tiani was supposed to see you? End this silly farce of yours?”
Of ours, I’d wanted to say, but I’d held my tongue and agreed to drop it for now.
Finally, I reached the top of the stairs, built into the steepest part of the climb, and found a place to let Tiani hop down. I tried not to notice how my body missed her warm weight.
“Wow,” she said and came around to eye me. “Not even sweating. Thanks.”
“You’re welcome,” I said with a small nod. “On our way back, you carry me, though.”
Tiani laughed. “Sure.” She turned and faced the house. A rustic log cabin with stone accents, it was sturdy, not too showy, and of adequate size. Hence why Kal had taken it. “Oh, Iris must love this place. You know, I don’t think she’s ever had a home anything close to something like this.”
“She loves it. Kal gave her an entirely empty room to redo a month or so into her living here," I said randomly. “You should have seen how delighted she was. That’s when I knew she wasn’t going anywhere.”
“Wait, what? Why? And why so late?” Tiani asked as we approached the door.
“Ah, that’s right—you don’t know the full story yet,” I said. “Iris will fill you in.”
“Oh, man,” Tiani said and rubbed her palms on her legs. “I’m nervous.” She briefly gripped my arm, and a nerve zinged through me. “Thank you. Both for bringing me here and for coming.”
“I wouldn’t have missed this for the world,” I said. “Although Iris won’t be happy with me.”
“I’ll take care of that,” Tiani said and knocked.
I’d warned Kal that we were coming, and I hoped he’d found a way to calm Iris down a little. Energetic was her middle name. I could hear bounding footsteps inside and, without thinking, rested a hand on Tiani’s shoulder.
Tiani briefly touched my hand, and the muscles under my fingers tensed as the door swung open. Iris was standing there, smiling already, and her curls fell in a bright torrent of honey and amber around her face. Then her smile faded, and her brown eyes widened as she took us in.
“Tia,” she gasped and put her hands out tentatively, as though afraid to dispel the illusion.
When Tiani took them, her own hands shaking, Iris gasped, then shrieked and threw her arms around her friend, almost knocking her over. Only, Tiani clearly was expecting this and had braced herself. Even still, I pressed a hand on her back to steady her, and she gave me a quick smile as she wrapped her arms around Iris.
“Hi, blondie,” Tiani said and rested her cheek on her bright curls. “Missed you.”
“Tiani Elkhadi, where have you been?” Iris demanded, and her voice was choked as she squeezed harder. “Dammit, Tia, I was worried!”
“I know—I’m sorry,” Tiani said, and Iris stepped back, staring up into her friend’s face.
I thought I saw disquiet flash into Iris’s eyes, as though she’d seen something there she’d feared to find. But then Iris was smiling and ushering us in, reaching out to give me a brief hug.
“Wow.”
Tiani was looking around the house, the tall entry wall leading into an airy living room and a giant kitchen off to one side. When Kal had lived alone, the walls had been barren except for one or two pictures of stern, manly nature scenes like waterfalls or bears or something. Now there were cheerful flowers and photos, as well as a few paintings done by Sierra, Tristan’s mate.
Altogether, the place was beautiful, a blend of Iris and Kal, and the life they were starting together. Kal came up, grinning as Iris introduced him and Tiani, flicking his eyes to me. I went to speak, but Tiani beat me to it.
“Oh, we’ve already met,” she said, and there was an impish look in her eyes as she glanced at Kal. Iris turned daggers on Kal, who grimaced and glanced at me.
“You’re early,” he growled.
To my surprise, Iris whirled on me, too. “Xander Bane, I am surprised at you,” Iris said and gave me a narrow look. “You better have had a good reason.”
Raising my eyebrows at her, I said, “It was for Tiani’s safety.”
Iris relaxed a bit even though her eyes were still narrowed. “Hmph.” Then she looked at her friend, before dragging her over to the couch and sitting her down. “Tia, what happened? Did Lind get you? Are you sick? You’re so thin—well, thinner than usual. I know how you like to keep up your muscle tone and proteins, working out and running. When’s the last time you ate?
“Aw, Iris, I missed you,” Tiani said, and there was a knot of emotion in her voice.
Immediately, Iris’s eyes welled up, and I gestured with my head at Kal. We escaped into the kitchen, and Kal reached up into the cabinet, pulling down an old bottle of whiskey.
“Luke said Tiani got ill.” Kal gave me a measured look. “Everything okay?”
I shrugged. “Yeah, it was a bit of a relapse, I think. Kind of reminded me of when Laia got here and was ill.”
“Hopefully, that’s where the comparison ends,” Kal said, a bit darkly.
His cousin's mate had not only been sick when she’d gotten here, but had also been in possession of a crian shard and a secret that had nearly cost Laia her life and Rett his heart.
We lingered in the kitchen a little longer, then Kal brought in glasses of water to the ladies. I followed, wondering uneasily if Iris was going to be upset with me.
Instead, the blonde hopped and threw her arms around me. “Oh, Xander, thank goodness you were up there. Tiani might not have made it.” Iris held my arms as she stepped back and smiled at me. “I’m sorry, I understand you have to make tough choices.”
“Thanks, Iris,” I said warmly, glad to have her as a friend and confidante. She’d found out my secret because of her research into Orion’s notebook. We still weren’t sure whether he knew or had made a shrewd guess, but either way, we were now prepared. “And don’t blame Kal; it was all me.”
“As tempting as it would be,” she said and glanced over at Kal, her face softening and brown eyes shining at him in a way that made Kal smile gruffly and duck his head, “I won’t.”
Kal winked at Iris, then looked at Tiani. “Tiani, you’re welcome here any time.”
“Thanks,” she said, and I saw her look from Kal to Iris. Something crossed Tiani’s face, and she dropped her lashes, hiding her expression. As Iris plopped down next to her, though, she looked up and cheerfully said, “You know, I can’t leave you alone for a second. A few months, and you’re in Winfyre with the Ice Bear as a mate.” A wicked smile spread across her face. “Tell me everything.”
“It’s a good story,” I interjected.
Tiani gave me a quick, indulgent grin as Iris launched into the tale, her hands fluttering as she brought us to a distant corner of forest on a quiet fall day and the wheels that were set in motion to change her life. Glancing over, I saw Kal watching his mate and knew he had to be thinking along those same lines, an affectionate smile tugging at his lips. But his eyes were troubled and flicked briefly to Tiani.
I followed his gaze and saw that Tiani’s posture was alert, her head tilted in a strangely familiar way. It was only as Iris continued to speak that I realized she reminded me of Iris. Of course, they would share mannerisms since they’d lived together since they were teenagers. But I also wondered if someone who didn’t know Iris would be able to pick up on it from Tiani.
Tiani was far more reserved than
Iris, better at schooling her face and hiding her feelings. It was almost like Iris was a prism through which to see Tiani.
And something about Tiani was off. Some shadow lay on her.
I saw it, Kal saw it, and Iris saw it. Yet there was nothing we could do, except wait and hope.
I suddenly recalled the first time I’d met Iris, on the border of Winfyre. Tristan and I had gone to meet them, worried about the terrible storm that had rolled through. Kal had been even more distant than usual, and I’d taken that as a sign of trouble.
Instead, we’d found Kal wasn’t distant; he was distracted. The curly-headed cause had been smiling up at him, and Tristan had gripped my arm, beaming at me as we watched. Kal’s entire body had been alert to that smile and curved towards Iris.
At that moment, I’d known they were mates and had been happy for him.
Still, a small pang had gone through me. One that still ached at times as I came to accept that I had to put some distance between me and my old friends. The rest of the Alphas could only do so much when it came to Winfyre. Though they'd vowed to follow me to hell and back—in reality, they could only follow me so far. Especially with families and mates.
I'd been taking pains to make sure of that, quietly and unobtrusively figuring out ways to absolve them of some of their responsibilities to Winfyre. Their families should come first. I didn't share those obligations. I never would.
But as I looked from Kal to Iris, then to Tiani, whose lips curled up in a bright smile as she let out a bubbling laugh, a deep ache went through me. Almost as though I regretted that I’d never regretted that before.
Pushing that to the side, I focused on enjoying this moment, right here and now.
Because it couldn’t last.
Chapter Eleven
Tiani
This is dangerous.
Tilting my head up to the sky, I watched the play of dark clouds against a deep glow of afternoon sun. The light had a tricky quality, making it seem later than it was, due to the heavy mass of clouds hanging low over the world. But between them were arches of a pale, ephemeral color that I wished I could fade into.
A rueful laugh escaped me. Only I would be in a beautiful place like this, safe, with every potential for happiness and a real home—and want to vanish.
Stretching my arm up, I held it against the sky and then curled my hand into a fist. The bracelet glinted in the sunlight and sent a shudder down my spine.
Five weeks. That’s what I’d decided.
Five weeks to spend time with my best friend, to enjoy this blip of joy, and then I would have to make a break for it. I had no choice.
If I let myself, I would sink into the peace of Winfyre and forget what I’d done.
I wouldn’t, though. All that mattered was that Iris was safe and happy. Over the last week, I’d spent as much time as I could with her. Sometimes Kal joined us. I now knew the lengths that big, silent ice bear would go to for her. Even better, Iris could take care of herself now. Her gifts had awoken, and she was learning how to fight.
Altogether, I was reassured that Iris had a good and safe life in Winfyre. Not only that, but she also helped keep it safe. Now I understood why Orion had feared Iris’s power’s manifesting. So long as she was a sleeping Riftborn, he’d been amicable to our deal.
Pain lodged in my throat. If Iris ever found out…
Found out that I’d kept an eye on her for signs of her gifts, had been in and out of contact with Orion to keep him updated on her, and had signed away my own life for hers.
Clouds piled up and swallowed the light, rendering the metal on my wrist a dull gray.
Fitting, as it was the fetter that turned me from shifter to stasis.
My hand dropped to my side, and I ran a finger over the metal. It was something I tried not to dwell on, even when it seemed that my gifts still hummed deep down. Somewhere, waiting, in the lining of my soul, maybe. A power and a fire that kept me alive and safe on deep winter nights.
Maybe one day, I can be free.
Orion had told me with a wicked, cold laugh that I could take it off at any time.
Don’t say I’m without mercy, my dear. Anytime, anyplace, take it off, and our deal is done.
I was no one’s fool. No, once I’d made a deal with the devil, I knew there was no getting out of it. Jaw gritting, glad I was alone, in this hidden stretch between the forest and the sea, I once again wished I knew why. Even after finding out about how Iris had taken him down, which did fill in some of the sketchy suspicions I’d formed over the years, I still couldn’t be sure why Orion had struck this particular deal with me.
Wear this bracelet, report in when called, and keep tabs on Iris.
Although Orion had sworn he never meant her harm, I didn’t trust him. I never had.
Especially a year and a half ago, when some of my worst fears had been confirmed. Iris and I had discovered that all of the shifters from the Bloodfang had vanished. That was when Iris had pushed the hardest to go to Winfyre, but I’d talked her out of it, thinking it too risky.
Now I wondered if Orion had used me to keep her away from Winfyre. Would Iris and Kal ever have found each other if I hadn't wound up in Lind's clutches? Had I almost prevented my friend from finding her mate? Had that occurred to her? She'd freely forgiven me for the deception and for keeping her away from Lind.
Would she have been so forgiving if she knew the full story? Especially since she could have come here years ago and met Kal sooner…the thought made me sick to my stomach. Here I thought I was protecting Iris, and I may have almost cost her something precious.
Even though there was nothing I could do to change what had happened, I couldn't stop the mental gymnastics. The weight of my lies seemed stark in these mountains. What did I do now?
Well, what if Orion really is gone? Maybe that’s why Lind wasn’t after you—the Northbane have been looking for her, and they haven’t found her. Maybe it’s all over.
Maybe you can start over here.
I wished I could believe that.
But something stopped me every time I went to rip off that bracelet. Some what if in the back of my head. No, I’d stick to my plan. In five weeks, when the weather was warmer, I’d slip out of Winfyre and hopefully dodge whatever murderous creature was lurking on the border. Then I’d head for the Tiselk. Bury myself in the icy desert and eke out a survival.
A dismal plan that made my heart sink a little lower every time I thought about it, but better than putting everyone here in more danger because of my mistakes.
The wind was picking up, and I turned, making my way back to Bane’s house. The bungalow had a hold on my heart I didn’t want to examine too closely. Every time I saw it, my heart leaped and my footsteps quickened. It was the homiest place I’d ever lived.
More than that, I couldn’t repress the eager little leap to see if Bane was home. I didn’t want to like him, yet I also looked forward to running into him. We’d bumped heads a few times, especially when he’d found I was traipsing up to Iris’s house alone. That, and we still weren’t quite sure what to say to each other. Or, no, I didn’t know what to say to him. Calm and enigmatic, with unreadable expressions and rare smiles. I wanted to yank him down to earth and pin him there.
Every time we circled each other, we came a little bit closer, though. Two aloof fools who couldn’t admit they were curious about each other. I in a ravenous and irreverent hunger, Bane in a dutiful and dignified amusement.
However, I also barely saw the man. When I did, our conversations were short and hurried. The longest we spent together was maybe half an hour at most. Then Bane would have to leave.
In another life, I would’ve been a bookish, happy cat lady, alone with my books. Maybe Bane would be the handsome, courteous, and mysterious librarian who’d give me book recommendations I’d fight him on, then later relent. We’d be friends. It was one of my favorite fantasies.
The others were not fit for polite society.
Somet
imes, though, I woke up in the middle of the night and raged at the growing weakness in my heart when it came to him. This would be interrupted by the untimely memory of how Bane had picked me up and taken care of me when I was ill. Or insisted on giving me a ride on his back up that monstrous hill to Iris and Kal’s.
Ugh, why did he have to be so strong and warm? I paused on the trail and leaned against a tree, looking up at the sky again. How many times this week had I caught myself tracing my gaze over the swell of his lats or biceps? Or remembering, with perfect clarity, the strength of those muscles as they flexed to hold me up?
Way too many.
As I started walking again, my neck prickled, and there was a soft hiss through the air behind me. On instinct, I spun around and kicked my foot out, sending a hooded figure sprawling. Before I could get a good glimpse, another came at me. Only instinct had me ducking as a long blade sliced the air where I’d just been. My brain still hadn’t caught up to what was happening.
Not until another sword-wielding hoodlum came at me.
Assassins? I wondered as I dove at the swordsman. In Winfyre?
Were they Northbane who were unhappy with me or—
One of the hoods fell back, and I started in surprise, dropping my guard.
A boy no older than sixteen stared back at me. His cheeks were hollowed out by hunger and rough from exposure. Pale brown hair fell into his eyes, and he nervously bit his chapped lips.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, in both shock and concern. “You’re a kid!”
“So? That’s none of your business,” he said and made another move, but I dodged it.
“How old are you?” I demanded. “And who taught you such crappy swordsmanship?”
“I’m—” His eyes went wide and darted beyond me.
Before I could react, someone landed a kick on my lower spine, and I hit the ground, hard. Breath burst out of me, and I rolled over only to have a sword at my throat.
Dragon's Oath (Northbane Shifters Book 5) Page 10
