“Please, Xander,” Tiani said, and immediately my body gave in, relaxing into the bed. “Mm, thanks. So nice and warm.”
Tentatively, I wrapped my arms around her and focused on relaxing my body. I was tired enough that soon I drifted off, the stirring of heat and desire muted by the sense of rightness and comfort. Soon I drifted off into deep, pleasant dreams and the best night’s sleep I’d had in weeks.
The next morning, I woke up alone and well after the sun had risen. Rested and rejuvenated, I still felt a sense of trepidation when I came out into the living room. But the scent of coffee and Tiani’s smile greeted me. She came over, pushed a mug of coffee into my hand, and pulled me down for a kiss. My eyebrows were raised when she stepped back.
“You should sleep in more often, dragon-boy,” she said.
“If that’s how I’ll be greeted, I will,” I said.
There was an easy hour of banter and breakfast, with Tiani in higher spirits than she had been in yesterday. I kept up with her since I had the feeling she was putting on a good face for my benefit. But as soon as everything was cleared away, Tiani fell quiet and twisted her fingers together nervously. We'd both been putting this off long enough.
“I’d like for either Rogda or Beylore to take a look at you,” I said.
She nodded and pushed back her hair with shaking hands. “I feel like I should tell you everything first.” Her words were jerky. “You might change your mind after.”
“Give me a little credit,” I snapped, and she flinched. “Tia, no, I’m sorry.” Getting up from the table, I went to the window and looked out across the mountains, watching the sun cast deep rays of light into the sea. The clouds were hanging low on the distant horizon, and I thought, suddenly, of the storm the night Brody had died. “Actually, no. I’m being unfair to you. Again.”
Turning around, I saw Tiani was now perched on the edge of the couch, watching me. She tilted her head at my words and frowned. “How?”
“I haven’t told you everything,” I said. “My regrets, my secrets.” Letting out a long breath, I said, “If you could tell me everything as it pertains to Orion and the threat to Winfyre, that would be more than enough. You don’t have to talk about the rest.” My heart thundered in my chest. “Not until you’re ready.”
Tiani slipped down onto the couch and hugged a pillow to her chest. “Oh, Xander.”
I moved over, slowly and cautiously, sitting down next to her. “I think—no, I know—because of everything that happened between us and who I am…I thought I was owed an explanation from you. All of your history, distilled for me to make sense of.” I rubbed a hand over my face. “That is not how it works between friends, and especially not partners.” I looked at her. “I’d like to earn your trust, Tiani.”
“Did you not hear what I said to you last night?” she asked and whacked me with the pillow. “It’s not that I don’t trust you!” Tiani chewed her cheek. “It’s hard to think about, never mind talk about.”
I looked at my hands and curled them into fists. “There might be another way.”
Tiani pulled in a small gasp, and when I looked up, I saw her looking at my hands, too. When her gaze met mine, I knew she’d understood. She didn’t look afraid to have me peer into her memories, only a bit nervous and perplexed.
“I thought you could only read the memories of the Alphas,” she finally said.
“No, anyone who lets me in,” I said and then I tightened my grip. “Although I could probably break into a mind if I tried. Not that I would. Ever. For anything.”
Tiani laid her hand on my wrist and gave me a searching look. “Are you sure?”
“Are you sure?” I repeated back to her, with emphasis.
In answer, she lifted my wrist, and my fingers uncurled. My eyes never left hers as she held my hand against her cheek. Then her eyes fluttered shut, and I leaned in, my own eyes closing.
Usually, when I read the memories of the other Alphas, there was an impersonal sense underneath the actual sharing of memories. It was almost like a memo, a way to share information quickly and keep Winfyre safe. Only under great duress or in the grip of some intense emotion did it become all too personal. Yet even then, it only strengthened the bonds between us pals.
With Tiani, however, I had the sense of being knitted even more tightly to her. Invisible lines springing up and wrapping around us, tying us in ways that I couldn’t begin to fathom. It gave me a strange and vulnerable sense, so much so I almost pulled away.
But Tiani, sensing that, brought me to the memory of the first time she’d seen me. It was jarring and shocking to see my dragon form outside of my body, especially with the leap of wonder, awe, and envy that colored Tiani’s memory. Followed by a fear of getting caught, not a fear of mortal danger. Not even when I was a belligerent ass to her in the woods.
To my surprise, I sensed a smothered attraction at that moment and laughed, but then sobered as she pulled me back to six years ago, to the time around the Rift.
As always, with memories, I felt time passing in uneven spurts. Emotions shaped how time worked, with the blur of ordinary days and the slowing down of the sweet and sad memories. Iris and Tiani had been living an ordinary life, Tiani as a nurse, going about their days. Yet I sensed Tiani’s dissatisfaction and the way she seemed to sharpen after the Rift.
Filled with purpose, she and Iris had immediately joined the rebels, helping Riftborn and shifters alike. In fact, they briefly met and helped Reagan and her family. I was sure Reagan didn’t remember it, but that would explain why Iris had thought they’d met before.
Soon after, Iris began to manifest her gifts, and Tiani insisted they go north, out of the cities. Here, they encountered the Bloodfang and Orion for the first time. He barely registered at first, but then, as he began to flaunt his power and influence, Tiani became uneasy. She noticed him watching Iris, who was sweetly oblivious.
Before Tiani could act on this, however, she was distracted by the sudden arrival of her own Riftborn gifts. Time and again, she felt the pull to shift, until it became too strong. Out in the woods under a full moon, she shifted into a dragon for the first time. I recognized the same powerful rush of emotions that I’d experienced. Terror and awe, excitement and purpose.
Only the experience was short-lived, cut short by a sound in the woods. She didn’t have a chance to shift again, worried that she’d never heard of other dragon shifters. Worried someone would see. Yet yearning to fly and use her innate powers. The North called to her, too.
She’d also had dreams of coming to Winfyre and carving out a life, of finding a place.
It was short-lived. Before she could try shifting again, she was cornered by Orion.
All you have to do is wear this bracelet, and Iris will be saved. Of course, you won’t be able to shift, my dear. I do have a price.
Enraged, terrified, and with her back against the wall, Tiani had no choice—no matter how much she’d regret it and wonder about it later.
Don’t say I’m without mercy, my dear. Anytime, anyplace, take it off, and our deal is done.
At that moment, I knew Orion would have killed her rather than let her go free.
She either played along or died.
The years after the Rift became a cycle of hope and despair, in which Orion would let Tiani think she’d escaped him only to appear again. He never used her for information—no, she was part of his long game concerning Winfyre.
Oh, my dear Tiani, when it is time, you will help me bring Winfyre and the Northbane to their knees. No one will see it coming. Not Bane or his family of half-breeds.
Not even you.
You, their beautiful doom.
Tiani feared how she could be used against a place she’d never seen, against people who’d by all accounts found peace under an honorable order of shifters.
Her guilt mounting, along with her fears about Iris, she began to try to figure out a way to get Iris and herself to the Tiselk in secret. More and more, she felt trapped. Under a microsc
ope.
Iris went on a trip without telling her, an impromptu one for the Greyclaws. By this point, Tiani suspected that Norson was in Orion’s pocket, but before she could confirm that, she was tricked into a meeting and captured by Lind. Brought to Kizin Mountain and kept a prisoner, she endured Lind’s torments with the comfort of knowing that Iris was safe.
When her friend's life was threatened, however, Tiani broke out. Lind could pretend she’d let Tiani go all she wanted, but I was certain Tiani had gotten the better of her.
Here, her emotions and memories took on a different hue. Hope stole back into her heart, along with longing and joy. I hadn’t been nearly as smooth or reserved as I’d thought, but in a way, that was a relief. And I almost forgot what was coming next.
Tiani tried to dodge the memories of when she’d left, but I caught a glimpse. Her heart had been broken, and she’d walked around the whole house, committing it to memory.
Committing our time together to memory, trying not to forget a single moment.
I’d never experienced that before, and it gave me a sense of sinking deep into her mind, almost as though I were there with her. Watching as she left the note, hesitating on the doorstep and then forcing herself to leave. Holding her head high as tears glittered on her cheeks.
The long, cold days of slogging toward Kizin Mountain. Trying not to think of what she’d left behind or what was ahead of her. The crushing loneliness that would swamp her, followed by anger, leaving her bereft with longing. With missing Iris.
With missing me. Wishing, somehow, things could be different.
As Tiani approached Kizin, her memories became sharper at the edges, like fragments of broken glass, and certain things leaped out. The rough manner of the guards at the door, Lind’s soft, mocking laughter, and the twist in her stomach at seeing Orion.
The conversation was painful, and, while Tiani was confused, I wasn’t.
I’d had a theory about this monster, one I hadn’t shared with anyone and one Iris had inadvertently led me to without her even realizing it. Sometimes I wondered if Lor had come to a similar conclusion, but we hadn’t talked about it. Not since Orion had departed for the Rift.
Now that he was back, though…
Orion reached for the bracelet, and then pain tore through me, so much pain that I was thrown out of Tiani’s memories and let out a cry of anguish.
“Xander!”
I lowered the hands that were clutching my head and looked at her. “I’m going to destroy him.” Rage burst through me, and twisting guilt. “Oh hell, Tiani, I’m so sorry.”
“It is not your fault,” Tiani said.
“But if I wasn’t—”
“That’s what he wants,” Tiani said. “Looking back, I see that now. Anything to disrupt Winfyre and especially the bonds between mates.” She rested a hand on my knee. “But in trying to do that, he gave himself away. He’s afraid of the Alphas and especially their mates.”
“He should be.” I frowned a little. “Although, I have to wonder what he knows that we don’t.”
“I don’t have to. It’s because we can stop him,” she said in a tone of absolute surety. “Somehow. Together.”
Roughly, I pulled her against me and rubbed a hand up her spine. “Still, I’m sorry you went through that. Lor will have to take a look at you—whatever Orion did, it’s a new and messed-up trick in his arsenal.”
“Well, can’t miss something I never had,” Tiani said philosophically, and I growled. “And I did get something I always wanted. A big family and a brilliant, hunky boyfriend.”
We stayed like that for a few minutes until Tiani sat back and gave me a long look.
“What?” I asked.
“What do you think he’s up to?”
“I have some ideas,” I said, hedging.
“So do I,” Tiani said with grim satisfaction. “Let’s hope the bastard showed his hand.”
“Did you figure it out?” Tristan asked. His face was drawn, and he was sitting back, staring up at the ceiling. “I mean, she survived a severing…”
“We don’t know that yet,” Lor said gently. “I haven’t had a chance to look at her.” I met my sister’s gaze. “Either way, we’ll do something to help her. Tiani’s strong. She’ll get through this.”
“What do we do now?” Kal asked bluntly and knotted his big hands together. I knew he had to be thinking of Iris, who was with Tiani and the rest of the Alphas’ mates at his house. He was worried about her and how she’d handle this news. “Xander?”
“Orion will be here in two days,” I said, “if not sooner. We need to start figuring out evacuations and get everyone in Cobalt up to Veda. Either by boat or by tunnels. We increase the patrols and send word to the other territories, as well as the Tiselk.” I hadn’t been able to sit still since I’d gotten to HQ. “And we are careful not to show our hand. This must be done quietly. If possible, I’d like for Orion to think we’re hunkered down here.”
“Why?” Rett asked, frowning.
I hedged. “Don’t worry about that now. What I need you four to do is to keep people calm. Look to Rett—he’s the best when it comes to this stuff, the most patient and charismatic.”
“So are you,” Rett pointed out, and his frown deepened. “What aren’t you telling us?”
“Are you planning on laying out dragon-sized bait?” Luke asked sharply.
“Xander,” Kal growled.
“No way,” Tristan said, and anger filled his face. “No, no, that’s not happening.”
“Not bait,” I said and met Lor’s eyes. “The opposite.”
“A predator lying in wait,” my sister said, and her lips twitched. “Orion is a fool.”
“As Iris and you realized, he chose his name without knowing his myths—that Orion is a warning about the ego of the hunter and the power of a scorpion’s sting.”
“Who’s the scorpion, though?” Luke and Kal demanded at the same time, while Tristan scowled, and Rett’s face creased with concern.
I didn’t answer. I only smiled.
Chapter Thirty-One
Tiani
Even though I was back in Winfyre, I kept being gripped by the terrible feeling that I would have to leave at any moment. Part of me knew it was probably a result of the whirlwind of the last few days. But another part of me was withdrawn and quiet when Xander had brought me back to the mountain cabin about an hour ago. He hadn't pressed me or asked questions, instead shutting himself up in his study when we got back.
I’d taken a nap and then woken up, disoriented and panicked. Internally, I was still in a state of shock and turmoil, although far better today than I had been. I couldn’t stop reliving the conversation that Iris and I had had earlier today. She’d been furious with me, the angriest I’d ever seen, and I couldn’t blame her. In fact, I think she’d been angry that I hadn’t fought back.
We’d had about an hour or so with the two of us, hashing out as much as we could, but then the rest of the ladies had arrived. I’d almost wished Iris would stay mad at me. I deserved it.
But, of course, she’d forgiven me, in front of everyone, and they had as well.
At first, there’d been some awkwardness on my part, but then each of them had regaled me with how they’d personally felt when they’d almost brought Winfyre to its knees.
“But no. Just an Alpha,” Laia had quipped, and we’d all laughed.
By the end of it, Iris had been almost back to normal, and I’d felt bonded in a different kind of solidarity with them. It made me realize that I’d been resisting being part of their friend group.
Hopefully, it's not too late, I thought again, with a touch of my old cynicism.
“What’s wrong?”
My heart leaped, and I looked up to see Xander towering over me, his hands on his hips. Every time I saw him, my heart seemed to grow a little bit bigger and burn a little hotter. I was honestly afraid my chest might not be able to contain it.
“Worrying,” I admitted, reve
ling in the fact that I didn’t have to lie or pretend. “Trying not to. Also, Iris isn’t too happy with me.”
“Yeah,” Xander said. “Earlier, I was infuriated with you again, but it’s passed.” His blue eyes had a mischievous spark. “Comes and goes.”
"I'm glad you're here," I said in a gust of gratitude. Xander had allowed me space and support to fall apart so I could put myself back together. "You have no idea."
“Where else would I be?” he asked.
I shrugged. “Saving the world. Brooding on a mountain. Working.”
“Saving the world is on my to-do list; we are on a mountain, although I don’t feel like brooding; and I’ve done enough work.” He bent over and kissed my forehead. “You hungry?”
“Not really,” I said. “Ate at Iris’s.”
“Yeah, I had an early dinner, too,” Xander said absently. “Dessert?”
“Oh, hell yes,” I said and hopped up.
We went into the kitchen, where Xander had a big piece of pecan pie. Sharing it, chasing each other’s forks, I let myself fall into the trap that this was all normal. I also was now wide awake with a second wind that promised to keep me up for hours.
Fingers drumming on the counter, I hoped Xander would stay up for a while with me. Tell me stories, debate with me, anything. I needed to be distracted.
Suddenly, he pulled me in for a kiss, and I melted against him, tasting the salty-sweetness of his tongue. This works, too. When we broke apart, I let out a long and happy sigh.
“I’m gonna go take a shower,” Xander murmured, and his thumb drifted up my neck. “You gonna go to bed or…?”
“I’m not tired,” I said and attempted a smile. “I was hoping we could hang out, but go ahead. I’ll read or something.”
“All right,” Xander said and kissed me again. “I’ll be quick.”
Sitting down on the couch to wait for him, I thought I'd nod off, but I became more and more antsy. Soon I was pacing around, wondering if there was anything I'd missed, or if I should be doing something. Anything. Helping in some small way.
Going over to the bedroom door, I tapped my fingers on it and poked my head in without waiting for a response. My brain was a thousand miles away, worrying and planning, but then it was back in the present in an eyeblink as I got an eyeful of Xander's bare, muscular chest.
Dragon's Oath (Northbane Shifters Book 5) Page 26
