Olivier barreled out through the doors, his vision blurring. He swiped at his eyes and took a hard left. He wished he’d driven here. Then at least he could lock himself away in his car, and hide his face.
I trusted Eric.
He headed for the back of the store, stumbling, holding onto the wall so he didn’t fall flat on his face. The sounds of traffic faded the further he got.
When Olivier was far enough from the store entrance, he slowed down, his heart thudding miserably. He shouldn’t have gotten so excited about Eric. Shouldn’t have given himself to Eric last week.
Were you just using me?
Footsteps thumped behind him. They caught up, faster than Olivier could walk. Then strong arms wrapped around him, and Olivier knew who it was, even without smelling him.
“I’m sorry,” Eric murmured, pulling Olivier snug against his chest. “This wasn’t—I didn’t mean for you to find out like that.”
“You didn’t mean for me to find out at all,” Olivier blurted. His face crumpled then, and he hid it in the crook of his arm so Eric wouldn’t see how upset he was. “Just—Just leave me alone. I don’t need you.”
But Eric pulled him closer, sliding his hot palm up Olivier’s chest. “You need someone.”
Then Eric turned him around. Olivier looked down, trying to hide his face. Instead, Eric caught his chin, tipping his face up.
His red-brown eyes bore into Olivier, worried. Olivier cringed, looking away.
“I hurt you,” Eric said.
Olivier blew out a shuddering breath. He didn’t want to be vulnerable to Eric anymore. He couldn’t. Eric had betrayed him. “You didn’t.”
“I did. And I’m sorry, okay?” Eric leaned closer, so their faces were inches apart and his breath was hot on Olivier’s mouth. “But you can’t forget that you’ve hurt me too, Ollie. The day before I left. That night—”
“That night shouldn’t have happened,” Olivier said.
“I kissed you that night,” Eric growled, his eyes dark. “And I meant it when I kissed you. I still think about it.”
You do?
Olivier trembled, closing his eyes. He didn’t want to remember that night. Not when it had been his eighteenth birthday, and Eric had presented as an alpha that very same afternoon. Eric had asked to meet him on the fire escape at their old apartment. Then Eric had kissed him, touched him through his pants, and Olivier had come against him.
That night, Olivier had realized who he wanted his alpha to be. It was Eric.
It was still Eric now, and despite Eric being a manager of Total Sounds, despite him ruining Olivier’s business... Olivier didn’t hate his brother at all. He still loved Eric.
And he wanted to stay in Eric’s arms, except he knew he shouldn’t.
Olivier looked away. “Leave me alone.”
“No. I won’t.” Eric slid his fingers through Olivier’s hair, pulling him closer. Then he dragged his nose against Olivier’s cheek, sniffing at him. “You need someone.”
In his arms, Ollie felt safe again. Eric’s embrace reminded him of last week, when Eric had held him. Kissed him, touched him. Eric felt right.
Except Eric had kept secrets from him. Total Sounds still stood between them like a knife, skinning Olivier a little at a time.
“I need someone other than you,” Olivier said, miserable.
Eric froze. “You... you do?” he asked, his voice strangled.
Olivier swiped at his wet eyes, really looking at him then. Despite his gelled hair and his neat clothes, Eric looked shaken.
“It doesn’t matter to you, does it?” Olivier said. “You’re just my brother.”
“I want to be your alpha,” Eric murmured.
Olivier stopped breathing. You do? “Oh.”
“Yeah.”
It was too much to think about, Eric being his alpha.
“I’ll have nothing else left if my shop closes, Eric,” Olivier mumbled. “Don’t you know that?”
Eric sucked in a shaky breath. “I’ll help you revive your shop.”
Would he, really? When Olivier didn’t even know how he could salvage his business? What if Eric was lying?
“I don’t know how you can.” Olivier wrenched himself out of Eric’s arms, his heart heavy.
“Wait! Ollie.”
“I’m leaving,” Olivier growled, furious at himself for wanting to step back into Eric’s embrace.
“I’ll let you leave if that’s what you want,” Eric said. “But it’s something else. You—you smell sweet. Like honey.”
“That’s got nothing to do with you.”
Except Eric grabbed his arm, pulling him back. Then he buried his nose in Olivier’s hair, sucking in a deep breath. “Yeah. You smell pregnant. I thought you took the morning-after pill.”
Olivier froze, staring blankly at him. “I did. I’m not pregnant.”
“You are.” Eric sniffed at him again, his breath hot against Olivier’s scalp. “I recognize this scent, Ollie. Don’t ask me to spell it out.”
Olivier stared at him. Eric stared back, his gaze unamused.
“You’re joking.”
“I’m not.”
Olivier looked down at himself, at his flat belly. It didn’t seem any different from yesterday, or last week. Then he sniffed at himself, but his skin smelled like carnation and cedar, and the chill of winter. Did it smell sweet? The scents were too confusing for him to pick anything out. I can’t be pregnant.
“It’s mine, isn’t it?” Eric eyed the bonding mark on Olivier’s neck. “You don’t smell like another alpha.”
“I don’t even know if I’m pregnant!”
“You are.”
Olivier flinched. “What if I say it’s not yours?”
Eric narrowed his eyes. “You slept with someone else?”
No. But Olivier had felt ill this whole morning, and he’d thought it was just another side effect of the morning sickness pill. The sensitivity to light, to sound.
If he was carrying Eric’s child... Olivier stopped himself from thinking. He wanted that baby too much to be disappointed again.
“Even if I’m pregnant, it’s not yours,” Olivier mumbled, hiding his face from Eric. “I’m leaving.”
Eric sucked in a sharp breath, his grip growing tight around Olivier’s arm. “You fucked someone else?”
“So what if I did?” Olivier snapped.
Eric growled, baring his teeth. “You’re... You’re...”
“I’m not yours.”
Eric flinched then. Olivier looked away, guilt filling his chest. If Eric didn’t know it was his child, if Eric didn’t have to be responsible... then he wouldn’t get into trouble. He’d get to keep his job, and he’d get along with the rest of their family, too.
You’ll ruin his life, Eric’s mom had told Olivier, a long time ago. Stay away from him.
Slowly, Olivier shuffled away from Eric, his thoughts a mess.
Eric tangled their fingers together. “You drove here?”
Olivier shook his head.
“At least let me send you back.”
And let him see the sad state of Olivier’s shop? “You’re still working.”
“I’m on a fifteen-minute break.”
“Your break’s almost over.”
But Eric was still holding on to him, he was still touching Olivier, watching him.
“Ollie,” Eric murmured.
Then he stepped close and cupped Olivier’s cheeks, brushing Olivier’s tears away. Olivier froze. This close, Eric’s eyes were intent. He raked his gaze down to Olivier’s mouth, and Olivier forgot to breathe.
“You can’t,” Olivier whispered.
When Eric kissed him this time, it was slow, soft. His lips snagged against Olivier’s, and his teeth grazed Olivier’s lower lip. “You’re pregnant,” Eric whispered against his mouth. “I don’t want you to go through this alone. Tell me if you have another alpha.”
Olivier’s heart squeezed. He wanted Eric more than he coul
d say. If he was really pregnant... he wanted Eric to hold him for a little longer.
“I need to go back,” he mumbled instead. “To... to the shop. I’ll have to get a test done. I—”
“Can I visit you? Later,” Eric said, pulling away just far enough to look into his eyes. “Just to make sure you’re okay.”
Olivier gulped. He shouldn’t. And yet... being in Eric’s arms was such a comfort. “Maybe. I don’t close until nine.”
“I’ll be there,” Eric murmured.
Ollie’s heart leaped. “O-okay.”
Eric squeezed his hand, staring into his eyes. Then he left Olivier, striding back into the store.
Olivier sank bonelessly against the wall, touching his mouth. Eric had kissed him. Worse, Eric had said he was pregnant.
Was it true?
An hour later, Ollie paced behind the counter of Olivier’s Strings, his stomach twisting.
He’d done it. He had a pregnancy test sitting on the store’s bathroom counter, and the wait was killing him. Three days of vomiting. Four days of on-and-off dizziness. He’d done an enema, he’d washed out all of Eric’s seed.
He shouldn’t be pregnant.
“Ugh!” Levi stumbled out of the bathroom. “Were you leaving the pregnancy test where I could see it? On purpose?”
Olivier grimaced. “No! I just... I just forgot you might be going in. Is it done?”
“I don’t know.” Levi squinted at the countdown timer on Olivier’s phone. “Is it?”
Olivier groaned. There was a minute left. He stepped into the bathroom, forcing himself to count down along with the phone. Three seconds, two seconds, one second.
And then he was terrified of looking, in case Eric was wrong. Or right.
“Hold my hand, Levi,” Olivier said.
Levi held his hand. With his heart thudding, Olivier peered at the pregnancy test.
There were two blue lines. He was pregnant, and with Eric’s baby, no less.
Disbelief flooded through him. “How...? I thought I... It can’t be.”
“You mean you... Oh, gods, you’re pregnant.”
“Looks like I am.”
“That’s Eric’s, right? You didn’t use protection?” Levi looked incredulously at him. “He’s your stepbrother!”
Olivier groaned, hiding his face.
“I mean, I would recommend condomless fucking,” Levi said. “But not with your stepbrother!”
“I had the morning-after pill,” Olivier mumbled. “I did an enema. I did everything I could.”
All of that fucking had felt right with Eric, and this... Olivier didn’t know if he wanted to laugh, or cry. He was pregnant with Eric’s child.
“The pill does have a possibility of failing,” Levi said, scratching his chin. “I believe it’s a five-percent chance...”
Olivier covered his face. “Do I smell pregnant?”
Levi sniffed. “You do smell kind of sweet.”
Same as what Eric had said.
Olivier whimpered, his relief so thick that it tightened his throat. That was Eric’s baby inside him. Eric’s flesh and blood, and Olivier could never tell him. But oh, to have part of Eric as his to hold, his to cherish...
“I’m sorry.” Levi hugged him.
Olivier sniffled. “I’m not sad.”
Levi frowned, confused.
“I’m just... happy.” Olivier managed a wobbly smile. He touched his belly, imagining the tiny, growing clump of cells there. “This is something I want.”
Levi looked dubious. “If you’re sure.”
“I am.”
“You make questionable decisions, Olivier.”
Olivier laughed, hugging his belly. If he’d been through the pill and enema, and the baby was still here... then he was meant to have Eric’s child, wasn’t he?
A quiet, secret joy bloomed in his chest. When he saw Eric later, he would be vague about the child’s alpha dad. Maybe it wouldn’t look like Eric. Maybe it would look like Olivier, and no one would question its parentage.
But with his failing business, how would Olivier care for his child?
Olivier shoved those doubts away, cradling his belly. He was pregnant. He had someone he could call his family.
Maybe things were finally looking up.
9
Eric
Eric crossed the parking lot to Olivier’s Strings, his stomach twisting.
He’d fucked up again. He hadn’t meant for Ollie to find him at Total Sounds. He’d seen Ollie’s gaze drop to his badge... and that had spelled out all of what Eric had done. Opening the branches, advertising to Ollie’s customers. Stealing Olivier’s livelihood away from him.
Gods, I’ve been such a bastard.
Eric had wanted to explain all his wrongdoings. He’d wanted to apologize, maybe offer some help. Instead, he’d gone and kissed Olivier.
I want to be your alpha, he’d said. Because it felt right. Because a tiny part of his chest had said, We can make things right once more.
Things were never that easy, though.
At least, Olivier hadn’t acknowledged it. What had Eric been thinking, anyway? Did he think Olivier would accept him after today?
Eric needed to fix this mess. Make things up to Ollie. And maybe, if Olivier forgave him... he’d think about the other things. Like the baby in Olivier’s belly that wasn’t Eric’s.
Jealousy gnawed in his gut. So what if he’s slept with someone else? Maybe he doesn’t want that baby. He’s probably trying to abort it right now.
Eric steeled himself when he stepped up to Olivier’s Strings. It was late; the shop’s warm glow poured through the windows. Eric glimpsed Levi in one corner of the shop, and Olivier at the counter, fiddling with something.
His nerves strung tight, Eric pulled open the door. The bells jingled.
Olivier turned; Eric expected him to look miserable.
Instead, Olivier wore a tiny smile on his face. He touched his belly, the look on his face warm and soft, like an expectant omega. Like he wanted the child.
That child wasn’t Eric’s, was it?
Eric stopped at the door, the bells jangling behind him. You want that baby? It felt like a punch in the gut.
Olivier looked up, his smile fading. “Eric?”
“You did a test,” Eric croaked.
“Yeah.” Olivier blushed. “It came out positive.”
“You’re—you’re keeping it.”
Olivier nodded.
“You don’t know who the other dad is, do you?”
Olivier paused, before he shook his head. Eric wanted to growl. You were so keen on getting rid of that baby when you knew it was mine. Do you hate me that much? I thought you cared about me.
Why was he even this upset, when Olivier had only just stepped back in his life? None of this should matter.
An older lady bustled up to the counter, a wide smile on her face. “Oh, Olivier! I didn’t know you were pregnant!”
Olivier tensed, his eyes flickering to her in alarm. “Mrs. Antoinette! I didn’t realize you came back—is something the matter?”
“Oh, no!” She waved and gave a cheery smile, the bells on her shawl jingling. “I was over at Total Sounds and realized they didn’t carry these bronze strings. My nephew was looking for them.”
She set a box of strings on the counter, looking curiously over at Eric. Eric shrugged and turned away. Didn’t know what to do, aside from waiting in the aisles for Olivier.
“Is that your first child?” Mrs. Antoinette asked. “You must be so excited!”
“I am,” Olivier said, a smile in his voice.
Eric closed his eyes, his stomach turning. I thought you didn’t want one.
“Have you decided on a name?” Antoinette asked.
“No, I haven’t.” Olivier beamed. “I only found out today.”
“That’s wonderful news!”
“It sure is.”
Eric almost left the shop. Maybe it was a bald-faced lie. Maybe Olivier didn
’t actually want the baby.
But by the time the transaction was over and Mrs. Antoinette breezed out through the door, Olivier was still smiling.
Eric stared, at a loss for words. Do you even want me here, or would you rather I leave? Clearly you’d rather have some other bastard’s child.
When Olivier met his eyes again, his cheeks were pink. “Sorry. I... realize you’d probably rather not know about that.”
“What, the baby?” Eric growled, stalking up to the counter. “I thought you didn’t want one.”
Olivier glanced around the shop, panic flickering through his eyes. In a mumble, he said, “Can we not talk about this here?”
Eric followed his gaze. There were a few customers in the shop, probably brought in by the new red SALE! sign in the window.
Olivier turned to the backroom, and Eric rounded the counter, following him inside. Then he shut the door.
Olivier breathed out, pausing by his desk. He looked small then, thin and delicate, and Eric kind of regretted being pissed with him.
There were so many things Eric wanted to say. About the baby. About Total Sounds. About... them. Him and Olivier. He didn’t know where to start.
“Look, I’m sorry about your business,” Eric said, so at least he could get that off his chest. “I didn’t even know this was your shop until last week. I’ve been working on the Total Sounds branches for the past three months. Way before any of this happened.”
Olivier glanced at him sidelong. “But you knew when... when you came in here last week. When we, um.”
Olivier blushed, and Eric tried not to think about last week. When he’d had Olivier stripped naked against him, his ass smooth and tight. “Yeah,” Eric said. “I knew then. I should’ve mentioned it to you. Sorry.”
Olivier sighed, but he didn’t look angry at all. “If you’d mentioned it then... things wouldn’t have gotten complicated.”
Was this complicated?
Then Olivier touched his belly, and Eric froze. How did the baby make things complicated?
“That’s my baby,” Eric said.
“N-no, it isn’t.” Olivier gulped, looking away.
Eric stopped breathing. He remembered Olivier saying, I don’t love you, and Olivier’s eyes when he’d looked at Eric, wide and hungry. That had been years ago, when Ollie had lied and shattered their relationship.
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