“It’s almost as though you haven’t seen me before,” Ollie mumbled, his cheeks prickling.
“I can’t get enough of you.” Eric caught Jenn’s hands, clapping them together. “C’mon, Jenn. Let’s cheer for Ollie to get into the tub. Go, Ollie go! You can get in the tub! You can do it!”
“Gods, Eric!” Olivier laughed, stepping into the warm water.
The heat soaked into his skin, drawing him into the tub like a siren’s call. Olivier sank into the water with a sigh. Eric lifted the shower head, testing its spray before he handed it to Ollie. “Here. Water’s warm.”
Olivier let the water patter all over himself, sighing at the welcome heat.
“Good?” Eric rumbled.
“Better if you’re singing to me.” Olivier grinned.
“Then you’d better sing along,” Eric said. “Still remember the lyrics?”
“Just the ones you sang.” Olivier winced. “It’s been a while.”
Years back, when Ollie was sixteen and Eric, fourteen, they’d attended the same music class. It had been somewhere safe, where Ollie could lean into Eric without being judged, and their voices had melded together.
“Let’s start over, then.” Eric met his gaze, his eyes warm with love. Olivier’s insides melted.
“Gi-gigi,” Jenn said, splashing water everywhere. “Dada!”
Eric laughed. “Yeah, yeah. Let’s sing again.”
“Ya-ya,” Jenn said.
Eric grinned, starting the first verse. Slowly, Olivier joined in, singing louder when he felt a little more confident. And as he sang, Eric’s smile grew.
“You sound different now,” Eric said between verses. “A little deeper.”
“Do you like that?” Olivier asked, cradling the shower head against himself.
“Yeah,” Eric growled. He lifted Jenn, moving her over so she could cozy up against Olivier.
On instinct, Ollie shuffled closer to cushion her. Jenn was tiny, and he didn’t want her getting hurt.
Will I ever be worthy of being her dad? Would Alice mind?
When they sang the second verse, Eric lowered his chords. He was trying to harmonize with Ollie—the moment Olivier realized that, his nerves tingled.
It wasn’t easy, harmonizing with someone. You had to alter the notes here and there, experiment a little, practice a number of times to get everything perfect.
Twice, Eric’s voice blended with Olivier’s in spine-tingling perfection. Eric’s smile grew. And as they sang the same verses over and over and Eric hit more perfect notes, Ollie’s pulse quickened.
“I can’t believe we’re doing this again,” he breathed, holding Jenn’s hands.
“Believe it,” Eric said, grinning wide. “About time we were. When’d you last sing with anyone?”
Olivier swallowed. “It’s been a while. Since... since you.”
Eric’s eyes darkened. He was the only person Ollie had ever tried harmonizing with. They’d sung the best duets in music class, and after Eric left, Olivier had turned to violins, unwilling to sing again. It hadn’t been the same with anyone else.
“So sing with me,” Eric murmured, squeezing Olivier’s hand. “Maybe someday we’ll get Jenn and the baby to join in.”
“A singing family?” Olivier grinned.
“Sure. Why not?” Eric smiled back.
Jenn joined in with her own singing. Their voices filled the bathroom, and it felt perfect in that moment, the three of them in the bathtub together.
It was only when the water grew cold that Eric glanced at the towels.
“You haven’t hugged Jenn,” Olivier said, reluctant to leave the tub. “Look at me, Daddy,” he said in a higher pitch, waving Jenn’s hands for effect. “I’m small and tiny, but my snuggles are fierce!”
Ollie scooped Jenn up and deposited her against Eric’s chest, growling like a dog. Jenn giggled.
“Sure you’re fierce,” Eric said, lifting her up.
Then he blew a raspberry against her stomach, and she squealed.
Eric laughed, wrapping his arms around her. He was huge compared to Jenn, his limbs powerful. And yet when he held his daughter, he did it with the utmost care.
Ollie’s heart stumbled. Eric was the perfect alpha; it seemed as though Ollie was falling deeper in love, every time he looked at his brother again.
“You look like you might devour me,” Eric murmured, snorting when Jenn shoved her thumbs into his mouth.
“I’m not going to devour you.” Ollie blushed. He climbed out of the tub and into his bathrobe, grabbing a towel to dry Jenn off.
Eric handed Jenn over carefully. Then he rinsed himself off and stood, water sluicing off his chest, rivulets streaming from his nipples to his abs, and down his strong thighs.
“Shall I stand under the shower for a full minute?” Eric asked, almost smugly.
Olivier flushed, looking away. He hadn’t been aware that he was staring. “You don’t have to.”
“I could, you know.”
Eric replaced the shower head on the wall and turned it on, and Ollie couldn’t help looking back. That was his alpha right there. All his instincts said to step forward and rub up against Eric, so he’d smell like cedar, too.
Eric smirked, stepping out of the bathtub. Ollie sat Jenn on the counter to dry her off, his breath hitching when Eric pulled him into a warm embrace, utterly naked.
Then Eric slipped his hands into Olivier’s bathrobe, dragging his damp wrists down Ollie’s chest.
“Mine,” Eric growled in his ear. He dragged his wrist across Jenn’s forehead, too, leaving his scent on her. “All mine.”
“You sound like one of those possessive grumpy father bears,” Olivier said, his heart fluttering.
“I probably am.” Eric kissed Ollie on the neck. “But you know, this should be my new way of marking you.” Then he blew a ticklish raspberry there, and Jenn shrieked with laughter.
“Eric!” Olivier squawked.
“Eeeic,” Jenn said, kicking her legs.
“Oh, Jenn.” Ollie sighed exasperatedly. “No, that’s not what you call your dad. Say ‘Daddy’.”
“Dada,” Jenn said.
Eric made a soft, delighted sound in his throat. It still hadn’t gotten old for him. Ollie couldn’t help smiling.
“What do you want for breakfast?” Eric asked.
“Raw salmon.”
Eric paused, looking askance at him. “Didn’t you use to hate that?”
“Not right now, I don’t.” Ollie smoothed his hand over his belly, and a smile spread through Eric’s face.
“Do we have salmon?”
Olivier shook his head. “I want soy sauce with it... which means I should probably head out to get some.”
“I’ll do it. Watch Jenn.”
“But you haven’t had breakfast yet!” Olivier frowned.
Eric shrugged, caressing Olivier’s baby bump. “Anything for my omega, right? What else would you like to have?”
Ollie blushed. “I’d... I’d like coffee.”
“I have some going in the kitchen. That’s decaf. But even then, you aren’t supposed to drink too much. There’s still a bit of caffeine in decaf coffee.”
“I know that!” But Eric had made that coffee for him, and Olivier couldn’t help beaming.
Eric grinned, kissing Ollie’s ear. “Be back soon. You’ll have to feed Jenn, though.”
“Will do.” Olivier scooped Jenn into his arms, following Eric to the front door. “C’mon, Jenn. Let’s wave bye-bye to Daddy. Bye-bye!”
Jenn opened and closed her fist, and Eric disappeared through the door with a smile. Jenn babbled.
“Now it’s just me and you,” Olivier said.
Jenn pointed to the door. “Dada!”
“Daddy will be back soon,” Ollie answered, heading to the kitchen.
They had been experimenting with feeding Jenn some finger food over the past few weeks. Ollie sat Jenn in her highchair, then poured out some cereal for her.
She grabbed a few cereal O’s, cramming one into her mouth. A few rolled off her chest, scattering across the high chair tray. One bounced onto the floor.
Ollie sighed. It was so rewarding when Jenn hit her feeding milestones, but before that... there really was so much to clean up.
But this was what he would go through with his own baby, wasn’t it? All of this caring for Jenn... he was learning valuable skills, and he was becoming better so he could be Eric’s equal.
Sometimes, Ollie glimpsed the pride in Eric’s eyes, when Jenn fed herself an entire serving of scrambled eggs.
Then there were the times when Jenn smeared pasta sauce all over her face, before grinning at him.
She was kind of lovable, he had to admit. Her smiles cheered him up.
Olivier filled her sippy cup with water, then filled his own mug with more milk than coffee. Added a heap of sugar, poured himself some cereal. Spooned some into his mouth.
“No!” Jenn said. “No, no, no!”
“No?” Ollie asked. He nudged her cereal bowl closer, only to have her reach out when he ate some cereal. “You want a spoon?”
He pulled out a tiny plastic spoon Eric had bought for her, setting it on the tray. Jenn fumbled with it for a while.
Eventually, she stuck the wrong end of the spoon into her cereal bowl and lifted it up, attempting to scoop cereal into her mouth.
She was copying him. Olivier bit down a smile, flattered.
“You really should be copying your dad,” he said, getting up to crack some eggs into a bowl.
The scrambled eggs for Jenn were easy enough. Olivier smashed the cooked eggs into smaller bits for her, then added salt and pepper to his own portion. He made another batch for Eric, but with more butter and milk—tastier food.
Jenn dropped her spoon on the floor. Ollie picked it up, and Jenn dropped it again, giggling.
“Do you drop spoons with your dad too, or only me?” he asked.
“Dada,” Jenn answered, looking expectantly at him.
What would it feel like to be Jenn’s dad? Eric had offered him the option a couple times, and Ollie had thought about it.
It seemed like such a huge responsibility, caring for Jenn. Even more than his own child, because Jenn was still Alice’s, and Eric had loved his wife. Maybe it was better for Olivier not to think of Jenn as his own. Alice would be mad at him if he did, wouldn’t she?
His heart pattering, Olivier replaced the spoon on Jenn’s tray. Jenn threw it off again.
“Ugh!” Olivier made a face. Jenn laughed.
By the time she dropped her spoon for the tenth time, Ollie had given up. He sat on the floor, waiting until she dropped the spoon again. Then he reached up and set it back on her tray, and Eric stepped into the kitchen.
Eric paused. “What’re you doing on the floor?”
“I’m tired,” Ollie said. “She’s making me exercise.”
Eric laughed. “How?”
“By doing squats.”
As though it was an invitation to demonstrate, Jenn dropped her spoon again.
Olivier groaned. Eric grinned, crossing the kitchen to Ollie’s side. Then he crouched and tipped Olivier’s head back, pressing a soft, damp kiss to his lips. Eric smelled like cedar, and the spring breeze.
“Mm.” Olivier’s eyelids fluttered shut.
Eric kissed him again. “You’re doing great,” Eric murmured. “I brought you salmon. Best I could find. Pigeon’s didn’t have it—I had to go to an Asian market where they had a sushi stand.”
Olivier’s heart skipped. “Thank you.”
“You’re really going to eat it raw?” Eric looked askance at him.
Ollie nodded. “Yeah. I hated it the one time I tried it... but I need to have some now.”
His stomach growled. Eric shook his head, handing the bag over.
The fish was expensive, at twenty-four dollars a pound. Olivier winced at the price tag, then ripped into the foam tray, rinsing the block of pink-orange meat at the sink. He patted it dry and sliced it thin. Dipped a chunk into a ramekin of soy sauce, and popped it into his mouth.
Eric shuddered with disgust.
The fish was cool, firm, almost crunchy with how fresh it was. Ollie savored the sweetness of its flesh, and the salty tang of the soy sauce.
The entire block of fish was gone before he knew it. Eric was still watching, enthralled and revolted.
“It’s just fish,” Ollie said.
“But it’s raw.” Eric made a face. “And you used to hate it.”
“It’s better than I expected.” Olivier licked his lips. “Do you want a kiss? For making the trip to get this.”
Eric hesitated for a long moment. “Think I’ll pass. Maybe if you rinse your mouth.”
Ollie laughed. Eric leaped at him, catching him in a tackle-hug.
“I’m not kissing you,” Eric said. But he dragged his nose up Ollie’s cheek, just sniffing at him. “Well, just your mouth. I can kiss everywhere else.”
That made Olivier smile. Eric kissed down his neck, and Jenn babbled, reaching out for her dad.
Ollie looked at Jenn’s red hair, her green eyes. Blurted, “Were you ever like this with Alice?”
He shouldn’t have asked it. He knew he shouldn’t. The moment the question left his lips, Eric froze.
But Olivier wanted to know. Whether Eric had been this intimate with another omega, whether there was a chance he could do the same with someone else. His heart thumped. “S-sorry.”
Eric shook his head. “Kinda. It isn’t the same, though.”
But he’d held someone else in his arms, he’d kissed Alice. Hell, Eric had slept with Alice, hadn’t he? And Olivier had no right to judge Eric for it, because he’d done worse.
All the same, Olivier couldn’t help feeling envious. He blew out a sigh, trying not to feel that way. “Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”
Eric rolled his shoulders. “It’s fine. You have a right to know.”
Jenn began to cough. Olivier tensed. Eric turned, worry flickering through his eyes. He stopped by Jenn’s side, thumping lightly on her back. Jenn’s face turned red, and she wheezed.
“She’s choking,” Eric said sharply.
Ice slid down Ollie’s spine. What do I do?
He hadn’t the least idea how he could help. What if they couldn’t dislodge the food?
Eric picked her up, turning her onto her front. He balanced her on his forearm, then thumped hard on her back. A piece of egg flew out of her mouth, bouncing off the floor.
Jenn wheezed. Olivier stared at the egg.
She’d been choking on that. He should’ve cut it into smaller pieces, shouldn’t he? Jenn didn’t have enough teeth to chew her food properly.
Ollie’s stomach twisted. He should’ve been watching her. He shouldn’t have distracted Eric. What if Eric hadn’t been here, and Jenn choked to death?
Horrified, Olivier stepped back. Jenn wailed. Eric bobbed her in his arms, murmuring. He looked shaken.
I shouldn’t have thought I could care for her. Olivier pressed himself against the sink, his heart beating too fast. Shouldn’t have thought I could be her dad.
When Eric met his eyes again, Ollie stopped breathing. He couldn’t help being afraid. Eric would say, You fucked up. I shouldn’t have asked you to be my omega.
Instead, Eric asked, “You okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”
Olivier shrugged, his joints stiff. “I messed up.”
Eric frowned. “I did. Should’ve been watching her.”
“I should have.”
“We’re both at fault, then,” Eric said.
Olivier gulped. How many times could he mess up before Eric decided he’d had enough? Olivier had left too soon to find out that very first time, back when they were teenagers.
Eric rubbed Jenn’s back until she calmed down. Then he crossed the kitchen, sliding his arm around Ollie’s waist. Olivier’s belly bumped against his hip; it was an awkward hug.
�
��What’re you worried about?” Eric murmured, stroking his back.
Olivier shrugged.
“Tell me, Ollie.” Eric kissed his forehead, his lips a whisper against Ollie’s skin. “Is it Jenn?”
Olivier hesitated. “Yeah.”
“I should’ve been watching her. She’s my responsibility, you know.”
“You trusted me to watch her. So... it was my fault.”
“Still mine, too.”
“She could’ve died,” Olivier mumbled, burying his face in Eric’s shoulder. His heart squeezed tight. “I just... I’m sorry, Eric. I promise it won’t happen again.”
Because Eric loved his daughter, and if something happened to her, if Ollie fucked up anymore... The blame would fall on his shoulders.
How did you say, I’m afraid you’ll leave me?
“I believe in you,” Eric whispered. “We’ll both learn from this, okay? It’s not just your fault, Ollie. It’s mine, too.”
Eric met his gaze, pressing their foreheads together. This close, Eric’s eyes were red-brown, framed with thick lashes. He was beautiful. So much better than Ollie.
Olivier gulped, twisting his fingers together. “I guess.”
Eric hugged him, and for a long moment, they stood quietly, Jenn babbling to herself.
“It’s okay,” Eric said quietly. “Face the future, yeah? Not the past. We can do this.”
Olivier gulped, breathing in deep. “I’ll try to remember that.”
Eric kissed his forehead. “That’s the way to go.”
“Gogogo,” Jenn said, wiping her egg-smeared hands all over Eric’s shirt.
Eric huffed, leaning away from Jenn. “See, she’s fine now. Don’t worry about it.”
Olivier cracked a smile. “I’ll try not to.”
Then Jenn grabbed Ollie’s hair, patting scrambled eggs all over his cheeks.
Eric sighed. “No, hon. Don’t cover Ollie in egg.”
As he turned her away, Jenn squealed. “Dada! No, no, no!”
“That might become her favorite word,” Olivier said dryly. Eric chuckled.
“She’ll be putting together whole sentences before you know it,” Eric murmured, kissing Ollie’s neck. “And then she’ll say your name, too. Or call you Papa.”
Ollie’s heart squeezed tight. “Maybe,” he said.
“She will.” Eric smiled more widely now, reaching around to stroke Olivier’s belly. “And she’ll play nice with her new brother. Or sister. Have you decided on a name yet?”
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