He held the horse for her, and Laura dismounted. Riding a horse was much easier than she’d thought it would be. Then Laura remembered how sweetly Anna had tried to encourage her, and she realized that many people found riding a horse for the first time a challenge. But maybe it had been so easy for her because of how long she’d wanted to try.
Once she dismounted, Laura gave Rascal another pat. “Thank you for being such a good sport. I hope we can do it again soon.”
The girls approached, each of them carrying flowers. Anna held out her bouquet to Laura. “I’m sorry I scared Rascal with you on her. I hope it didn’t upset you too much. I just got so excited that I forgot. I know I need to do a better job of paying attention when I’m around horses.”
With every word, Anna had looked at Lena, who had probably told her word for word what to say. But the little girl truly looked regretful, and Laura knew it wasn’t just because she got in trouble. She accepted the bouquet with a smile, then brought the flowers to her nose to smell. They were every bit as pretty as the ones she’d picked herself the other morning.
“What a lovely apology. Of course I accept. And such beautiful flowers. I love them. I hope we can find a vase or something to put them in. That way everyone can enjoy them.”
Emma held her flowers out to Laura. “You should take these, as well. Anna’s bouquet isn’t very good, but that’s because I stole the best flowers.”
Emma smirked while Anna scowled, and the other two adults just shook their heads. It was sweet to be included in such a normal family routine, but as Laura took the second batch of flowers, her heart ached at the thought that such a cozy family scene would not be in her future.
“Thank you, Emma. Both sets of flowers are quite nice.”
Emma seemed to ignore Laura’s attempt at boosting Anna’s morale, and turned to Lena. Though Anna smiled shyly at Laura as Emma spoke. “Now may we please go on our picnic?”
Lena sighed. “I didn’t hear you invite Laura.”
The girls turned back to Laura. “Would you like to come on a picnic with us?”
Laura had already known that a picnic lunch was on the schedule for today. She didn’t want to admit it, but she’d heard Owen and Lena arguing about it before breakfast. “Of course I would. Thank you for asking.”
The girls smiled, but Owen shook his head.
“No one’s going anywhere until we get this horse put away.”
Anna grabbed the reins and pulled the horse in the direction of the barn. “Come on, Laura. We need to get Rascal unsaddled and brushed so we can get on our picnic. If you ride the horse, you’re supposed to put it away all by yourself. But sometimes, when we’re in a hurry, Papa helps us. I’m going to help you today.”
Once again, Laura’s heart was warmed by the sweet child who felt a sense of empowerment at being able to help Laura and teach her about her horse. Children had always liked her, and she’d always liked children. What a shame this little girl didn’t have a mother. But she did have an aunt who was like one, and Laura admired Lena for the way she loved those two little girls as her own.
Laura followed Anna into the barn and was impressed at the dexterity with which the little girl undid all the fastenings of the saddle.
Then Anna turned to her. “I’m not big enough to take the saddle off all by myself, so you get to do that.”
Laura smiled as she did as the little girl asked, noting that Anna’s eyes were on her the entire time. The saddle was heavy and bulky, but Laura had been expecting that. Owen had made her saddle the horse. He’d given the same explanation about knowing how to care for the animals you used.
She carried the saddle back to the tack room and put it back the way Owen had shown her. Even though Laura had done a good many things for herself since leaving James, this felt like one more victory of claiming her independence. True, she’d done so with the aid of a child, but now Laura knew she could saddle and unsaddle a horse by herself. She didn’t have to ask a man to do it for her. And, even though she wouldn’t be able to ride like Owen, Laura understood the basics of riding, and that was progress.
When she returned home, she’d go down to the livery and ask about getting a horse that she could ride. Owen was right. Riding was one more skill that would strengthen her ability to be on her own.
She turned and saw him standing in the doorway, light filtering around him so that he was merely a shadow. How she longed to run to him and tell him about this amazing discovery. To thank him for giving her one more piece of her dignity back. But he probably wouldn’t value the gesture as much as she would. To him, it was just one more practical aspect of life on the ranch. Just another part of his job.
How could a man mean so much to her when she’d been working so hard at steeling herself against letting him into her heart? And how could he make it into her heart so easily when he’d made it clear that was the last place he wanted to be?
Neither of them had begun this time together with any intention of things getting personal between them, but somehow it seemed to be where they kept falling.
Or was that another sign of Laura’s poor judgment?
Clearly, she needed to be just as focused on the task at hand as Owen was, avoiding these thoughts.
Laura brushed the dust off her skirt and grabbed the comb they used to brush the horses after a ride.
As she passed Owen, she said, “Thank you again for letting me ride Rascal. I truly enjoyed it, and I hope there will be more opportunities for riding.”
Owen gave a jerky nod. “I’m glad. It’s a skill everyone should have, and it’s good you’re finally learning.”
His words confirmed Laura’s previous thoughts. No matter how close she felt to him, or how much she wished for them to be friends, he was just doing his job. All business, no heart.
Chapter Seven
Owen couldn’t have been more proud of Laura as he watched the jubilant expressions dance across her face. He remembered when his uncle had taught him to ride. He’d felt the same way, like he could hold his head in the air and be proud of who he was. There was something about giving people a new skill that they could take with them for the rest of their lives that was so empowering. It’s why he’d taught Laura to shoot in the first place. Too bad more victims couldn’t have the same opportunity.
The excitement in her voice had made him want to hug her and pick her up and twirl her around like he did with his girls. But that was too intimate of a gesture, and he had to keep his distance. It was easy to entertain fantasies of a future, especially with someone as lovely as Laura. She was so good with his girls, and he appreciated the way she treated them with respect. He’d had so many women fawn over the children and talk to them like they were infants or dogs. The girls were smart, and Laura recognized that.
He watched as Laura patiently brushed Rascal, with Anna helping out. Anna chattered to Laura nonstop, something that wouldn’t seem like a big deal to most people, but it always took Anna a while to warm up to someone new. There were still women they knew in town she didn’t speak to at all.
Lena and Emma came toward them, carrying a picnic basket between them. Knowing Lena, it was full of all sorts of tasty treats, and while Owen still wasn’t entirely sure about leaving the safety of the house, the meadow wasn’t far, and there were plenty of places to hide in between should the need arise. Owen’s gun felt heavy at his hip, reminding him that he had one other measure of safety. Though Lena liked to brag about his skill with a gun, Owen took no pleasure in using it. Shooting well was a skill born of necessity, something he’d learned to keep them from starving. A waste of a bullet meant a missed meal, so Owen had quickly learned to make the most of it. The skill translated well to law enforcement.
Anna led the horse over to him. “Is she cool enough yet?”
Owen smiled. Rascal hadn’t been worked hard enough to get too hot, but he was glad that
at least some of his rules were still deeply ingrained within his children. He made a show of feeling the horse’s chest. Then he nodded. “She sure is. Go ahead and put her away.”
Laura didn’t pay much attention to him as she passed by with Anna, intent on fulfilling her duty as Rascal’s rider.
When they’d finished putting the horse away, Owen picked up the basket and led the family down the small path to the meadow.
Ordinarily, he’d have the horses grazing. But it was better to keep the horses close in case they needed to make a hasty exit. As they approached the meadow, something about it didn’t feel right. But as Owen looked around for signs that anything was amiss, he could find none. The ranch was situated in such a way that he’d be able to see anyone coming from miles away. Even here in the meadow, which was the only reason he’d agreed to the silly picnic, he had a good view of the land between the ranch and the town in the distance. He’d seen nothing.
Lena spread the picnic blanket and set the basket on top. As she passed out the sandwiches, she smiled in a way that made Owen even more suspicious.
“I believe I forgot the lemonade,” Lena said. “You all just start eating, and I’ll go get it.”
That’s what had felt off. His sister was trying to matchmake again. True, the girls were still here. But Lena wouldn’t be around to act as a buffer between him and Laura as she’d done at every meal and in the evenings in the parlor. She obviously sensed the attraction that Owen felt for Laura.
Sometimes he caught Laura looking at him in a way that suggested she was developing feelings for him. Had Lena noticed, as well? And thought that there might be something there? But neither Lena nor Laura seemed to understand that these were not the feelings of love. Perhaps Owen needed to remind Lena of how he’d already made that disastrous mistake.
Laura seemed oblivious to Lena’s ploy. She smiled at Lena. “Do you want me to go with you? I could help.”
“Oh, I’ve got it, thanks.”
Before anyone could say anything else, Lena had dashed off in the direction of the house, leaving Owen alone with Laura and the two girls.
“Where’s the rooster?” Laura asked.
Owen looked around. He told the girls that the rooster was their responsibility. But before he could give them a lecture on properly taking care of their animals, Emma piped up.
“He’s in a time out. He wasn’t behaving like a gentleman, so we put him in his basket and left him in the barn.”
Lena had given the girls a large basket with a latch to keep the rooster in at night. If there was going to be a rooster in the house, it wasn’t going to roam around unsupervised.
“What if he gets too hot in there?” Owen looked at the girls firmly. “Did you leave him plenty of water? Is he in the shade?”
The girls looked at each other with the guilty expressions of children who hadn’t considered those things. Sometimes they got mad at him for having so many rules, but this was exactly why.
“Remember what I told you. You should always make sure that every animal under your care has access to plenty of water at all times. You also need to make sure that in the winter you’ve thought about warmth. And in the summer, you’ve thought about keeping them cool.”
He’d told the girls this before, but they were still young, so they couldn’t be expected to remember everything.
“We’re sorry, Papa. We’ll do better next time,” Anna said, looking chagrined.
Next to her, Emma nodded. “We’re very sorry Papa.”
Knowing that rooster, and the ruckus he’d caused already at night when locked in the basket, Lena would probably hear him when she got home. He wasn’t sure if she’d rescue it and bring it back to them or send it to the henhouse. Even though she’d originally agreed to let the rooster in the house, he was starting to think she was getting sick of the bird.
“We’ll see what your aunt decides to do with the rooster when she gets to the house.” Owen gave the girls a firm look.
They knew that whatever Lena decided, he would back her up 100 percent. That was the deal they’d agreed to when Lena had first come to look after the children. They stood behind each other’s decisions, and the rare times when they disagreed, they never let the children know it.
Owen reached into the basket to pass out the cookies Lena had baked.
“These cookies are delicious,” Laura said, sitting on the blanket and looking as pretty as ever.
She looked genuinely happy, and if there was anything Owen could say that he wanted for her, it would be her happiness. He could still remember the scared, miserable woman who was convinced that if she testified against her husband, he would kill her. It had taken a long time to coax a smile out of that fragile exterior. Now here she was full of joy and laughter as she chatted with his daughters.
Moments like this made him wish he’d met Laura under different circumstances. Or that her past had been different. Not that she had anything to be ashamed of, but when a woman was broken as much as Laura had been, she needed so much fixing that Owen wasn’t sure it was possible. Or, when she finally was whole again, she realized that the man responsible for her transformation wasn’t necessary anymore.
Would Laura love him if she didn’t need him? Would she still look at him with those doe eyes of hers once she could do everything for herself?
Maybe, but in Owen’s experience, that wasn’t what happened.
The girls finished the cookies and jumped up. “Papa, may we go pick some flowers?”
“Stay where I can see you.”
As they left, giggling, Laura turned and smiled at him.
“They’re such happy children. And very well behaved. You and Lena have done a remarkable job raising them.”
He let his gaze wander to the girls as they chased each other in the meadow. They had probably invented a game to see who would get the best flowers. Though they were often cooperative, they also had a competitive streak. He supposed they came by that honestly, considering that’s how he and Lena dealt with each other.
“I’m proud of them,” Owen said, his eyes still on the girls.
He couldn’t bear to look at Laura or her expression. It was probably full of sympathy and admiration. Most women thought him extraordinary for raising two girls on his own. And Lena even more so for taking on her brother and his children. But he hated that. Why would a man be so highly regarded for raising his own children?
“May I ask how long their mother has been gone?”
Laura’s curiosity was only natural. And though he’d told her that their mother was off-limits, the question was one that many people asked. He was tempted to give the same answer he always gave—a long time—but out of the corner of his eye, he saw a mixture of fear and sympathy. The sympathy was understandable, but the fear?
She was afraid she’d crossed the line, afraid of how he’d react now that she had. A piece of her abusive past she would never be able to let go of.
As much as he didn’t want to talk about it, he also didn’t want to be that man. Laura needed to know that she didn’t have to fear everyone, especially him.
“They don’t remember their mother. She left when they were babies. She said that she couldn’t handle raising twins on her own with me gone all the time. I tried to be home more, but it wasn’t enough. She was killed a couple years later.”
Sympathy shone in Laura’s eyes. “That must have been very difficult for you. I can see why you brought Lena in. How wonderful that she was willing to take care of them. Didn’t she want a family of her own?”
He should have known that opening up would only invite her to ask more questions. Lena’s life was Lena’s life. He knew why she’d done what she did. And that was enough.
“I suppose Lena had her reasons. It’s not my place to share them. But I will say that for us family is the most important thing. I suppose being an o
nly child, you don’t know what it’s like to have a sibling who cares for you.”
He turned his attention back to the girls. Even in the distance, he could see they’d found a butterfly, and were chasing it. The best thing he’d ever given them was each other.
“It’s good you have twins then,” Laura said as if she knew what he was thinking. “You’re right. It was lonely growing up all alone. My mother had several miscarriages, and I had a brother who was stillborn. My parents were so afraid of losing me, that they put me in a protective bubble where I was never allowed to do anything where I might get hurt. Falling in love with James was the first decision I truly made for myself about my life.”
Laura plucked a blade of grass and stared at it for a moment. Then she looked over at Owen. “I suppose it sounds rather pathetic, but since divorcing him, I’ve become rather good at deciding things for myself. I didn’t like how forceful you were with me that day in the boardinghouse, not giving me a choice. That’s why the way you taught me to ride, giving me choices and letting me make the decisions, felt so good.”
Owen wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say. Was he supposed to apologize for wanting to keep her safe? He supposed that’s what her parents had thought they were doing, too, but they’d gone overboard.
“I can appreciate that,” he finally said. “But you need to understand, there is a time for giving people choices, and there’s a time when you need just to do what you’re told without asking a lot of questions.”
His answer didn’t appear to make Laura very happy, but making her happy wasn’t his job. Her happiness was a bonus, but it was a lot like raising children. Sometimes the right thing wasn’t what made everyone happy, but it was best for everyone in the long run.
“Thank you for telling me about your wife,” Laura said. “I know you don’t like talking about it, so I especially treasure the information, and I’m glad to know. Do the children ever ask about her?”
Sometimes Laura was just like one of the children. What was that saying? You give them an inch, and they take a mile? Owen shook his head. “They know she’s dead. It seems especially cruel to tell them the rest.”
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