by F. G. Adams
Grabbing the tattered photo, I lie back on the bed and stare at the face I have memorized. I’ve formed a kinship with the person in the photo, even though we’ve never met.
Is it possible for someone to walk into your life unknowingly and make you think, this is why it never worked out with anyone else? Every moment in your life was pointing you in this direction?
It excites me and scares me all at the same time. I’m not looking for or even want to have another relationship. Ever. Again. That ship sailed long ago. Yet I can’t help but wonder what the young woman in the photo is like.
I’m a firm believer of things happening for a reason. The encounters and trials in our life help form us into the people we are. The men and women we become.
I learned a long time ago that fate has a nasty way of throwing shit out there and then sitting back to laugh as we scramble around trying to make sense of the craziness. Including my own father and his shenanigans, and losing the one person I loved most in the world.
Will I be the one to help Fallyn come home? Can I talk her into it? How the hell has she survived all these years on her own?
It’s possible she’ll flee the moment she sees me coming. Problems for another day. When I finally catch her, she can answer all my unanswered questions.
I place the photograph on the bedside table, turn off the lights, and roll over to try to sleep. My mind is bombarded with details of the road ahead. However, one thing is for certain. In the next few days, I’ll meet the ghost, Fallyn Blackwood, in person.
Ready or not, here I come.
2
Fallyn
The loss of innocence is the absence of something priceless I cherished, and to this day, the grieving process for that death continues to pull me further into an abyss of nothingness. Staring out into the darkness, I am overwhelmed as heartache consumes me.
I close my eyes, praying to a higher power the journey my mind is on will halt and I won’t go down that path tonight. Even after begging myself not to, I feel the blanket of sorrow wrap around me as the sandman calls my name. His sleepy chant tugging at the corner of my subconscious, pulling me closer and closer to that night so many years ago.
Lost. I'm so lost. I'm so far away from home and family.
Sinking. I'm sinking further into his web of lies and destruction, and I can't stop the spiral roller coaster I’m riding.
Despair. I'm blank and empty of any hope to escape his evil hold. The hold he has on me is suffocating the life from me.
I’ve learned to push these feelings to the wayside, but every year around this time, when the leaves begin to change preparing for the cold of winter, they creep back. I’m thrown into a past I’ve tried time and time again to suppress, but the events float idly to the surface. I relive that night. Every second of the longest one hundred forty-three minutes of my life.
The memories are real, a kaleidoscope of pages from my personal memoir. Haunting me with the vivid details. The night David, no, I mean, Roman Cabricci, changed me forever. I learned of his true name and nature then, too. The never-ending turmoil I brought upon myself.
If only.
Softly, I hear myself whimper. I’m on my family’s ranch. How did I get here? Why am I being forced to go back? I don’t want to remember. Why again?
I toss and turn, but my mind won’t release me from the twilight. I don’t want to be here. I try to force them back into the box in my mind, because like Pandora, opening the box releases the demon. Too late. The box is open.
Stop. Wake up, Fallyn. You don’t want to remember.
I’m involuntarily thrust back.
I’m trapped in the same nightmare.
The nightmare I once lived.
‘Live to see tomorrow’ was the mantra I repeated over and over. One hundred forty-three minutes of a living hell that seemed to last longer than my entire sixteen years of life had.
Random thoughts break the surface. My life had just started. I was only sixteen, for God’s sake! I wanted more than Lakeview had to offer, so when the new kid on the block arrived, I was drawn to him like a moth to the flame. It didn’t hurt that he was gorgeous, wealthy, and my father despised him. Anything to jab the grizzly bear father I lived with, I thrived on.
Trembling, I felt the cold restraints of steel on my wrists as the heaviness settled over my already aching, sore body.
He had been waiting for me when I arrived at our normal make-out spot on the large ranch my family owned. We had been meeting there for months, just to talk and fool around some. Nothing serious. I was a major flirt, but I wasn’t easy. I was saving myself for the one I would marry. For a faint moment in time, I believed it was him.
I thought I knew him. What did I know, right? Shrouded by the events from that horrible night, I continue the journey into the past.
As I walked closer, a quiver shook me. October in Lakeview, Florida, normally isn’t cold, but that night, the chill seeped into the deep marrow of my bones. I was risking so much to meet him. Jo was covering for me, and I didn’t want her to bear the brunt if my father noticed I was gone. We had all been his punching bag too many times to count.
It was pitch dark; only the sliver of the moon illuminated the area when a twig snapped and he stepped forward.
David was beautiful. The blue Henley and low-cut jeans accentuated his finely tuned body. A smirk traced his cupid lips as I continued to follow my line of vision, relishing in the moment.
When our eyes connected, I instantly stepped back, cringing. Something was off. The lustful, possessive gleam in his eyes wasn’t normal. There was something else.
A few seconds later, I recognized a familiar look. The same look Father wore when he was about to fly off on one of his rages. He was mad, but why would he be mad at me?
Clarity washed over me. David wasn’t my father. I wasn’t scared of him. I stepped forward and brushed the fingertips of his extended hand. They clamped down over my wrist immediately, pulling me off-balance.
“You’re late,” he said, dragging me in the direction of a black utility vehicle I hadn’t noticed before.
“You knew I had to wait for the house to settle before I could leave. What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing is wrong. It’s time. My father has blessed our union. Everything is finally clear. Let’s go.”
“Clear? What the hell? Stop, David. Where are we going? I didn’t think we would be—”
“You didn’t think, what? That I wouldn’t get tired of the games you play? Fallyn, you think you’re so smart, but you know nothing. I’ve been patient, because my orders were to wait, but your time’s up.”
What in the world was he talking about? This must be some kind of sick joke, because he had always been such a gentleman with me. I didn’t understand why he acted like a ranting lunatic.
He tugged me closer to the vehicle with ease; he was almost double my body weight. The boots I wore dug into the soft earth, but it didn’t slow his steady pace. I glanced down and the moonlight showed the marks in the dirt from my struggle. What was happening?
He jerked the back hatch up and pushed me in. I gasped when I hit the bottom floorboard hard. There was no give in the hard surface. I tried to turn around, but he was there, straddling my legs. His knees settled on the outside of my body as he grabbed my arms, yanking them backwards. I screamed in protest when cold steel tightly surrounded my wrists.
“Oh, my God, David! Stop it! Let me go right now, you… you asshole! This isn’t funny.”
I was mad and scared to death not knowing what’s wrong.
“Roman. From this day forward, you will address me as Roman. You aren’t going anywhere except where I take you. You belong to me. I’ve waited for this moment for years. I’m a very patient man, and in the end, you were worth the wait. So, you see, I can’t and won’t let you go. Ever. We are going to be so happy together. Enjoy the ride, darling.”
“What? You know I can’t leave the ranch. If I get caught out here, my dad will
kill me. Besides, I don’t want to go anywhere with you. Let me out now!” I screamed, beyond pissed and frightened. I couldn’t believe he was manhandling me. He had never treated me this way.
At this point, I still believed I was in control. Foolish Fallyn.
“My sweet, lovely Fallyn, you aren’t facilitating the chain of events happening. I am. Now, lie back and enjoy the ride,” he countered, his tone dripping with sarcasm.
“Why are you acting this way? This isn’t right. You said you loved me…”
He stood there staring at me, and for a fleeting moment, I thought he would start laughing, saying this was all a really bad joke. Instead, he didn’t answer and pulled the hatch shut, leaving me in complete and utter shock.
A shiver of dread created a heart-pounding fear. I stared at the moon up above from the rear window, praying God would help me get out of this situation.
Jo was bound to realize something was wrong if I didn’t return soon. Would she go for help or try and cover for me? Oh, God! She would cover for me, because getting caught meant involving our father. She wouldn’t give me up, which meant I was all alone. I had to get away from him.
Kidnapped and shackled against my will, I heard a door open and shut. Then the engine ignited with a loud rumble and the jarring ride began. I was thrown into the side wall of the vehicle, hitting the center of my back. The breath whooshed from my lungs. I tried to sit up, but a sharp turn slammed me into the partition, causing black spots in my sight. It was too much. I was overwhelmed by the throbbing pain from the hit and succumbed to the darkness.
Fighting drowsiness like a reel of an old picture show, fading out and into focus, I woke to a piercing bright light shone in my eyes. I tried to rub my balled fists over them but couldn’t. Something was holding them.
I opened my eyes and struggled to take in my surroundings. What was revealed almost stopped the beating of my broken heart.
I was naked on a bed. My arms and legs were spread-eagled and cuffed to the bedposts. I tried to wiggle my right wrist, and a drop of blood dripped onto the dusty-grey quilt below.
“You’re finally awake,” the voice in my nightmares stated.
The back of my head pounded from turning it so fast; a wave of nausea brought bile to the back of my throat, and I gagged.
There was something covering my mouth. Shit, I really must have hit my head hard to have knocked me out for the count like that. I had been thrown from a horse before on the ranch and suffered a concussion; that’s kind of the way I felt now. I took several calming breaths through my nose before I could focus on the voice.
Roman stood at the foot of the bed dressed in a blue, pinstriped business suit. Why was he wearing a suit? There was a vicious smirk painted across his once beautiful lips.
“I’ve been gentle with you, Fallyn,” he said and lifted his upper sleeve to rub his forehead. “I’ve dreamed of you just like this.” He motioned up and down my prone body. “From the moment I was shown your picture, I’ve been obsessed with desire, waiting for you to be mine, like I was promised.”
My panicked eyes widened. Promised? His statement wasn’t lost on me. Something terrible was about to happen.
Who in the hell was the person standing in front of me?
He continued, “Obsessed with how you will feel when I take you for the first time. How loud will you scream? Hmm? How hard will you struggle? How long will you cry out my name? Mmm.”
He paced back and forth in front of the bed I was strapped to like a caged tiger looking for a weakness before pouncing on its prey. His eyes were dark, and there wasn’t a trace of the person I knew anywhere in his piercing gaze.
“You have no idea, do you?”
He paused, waiting for a response, and hauntingly laughed, knowing I couldn’t reply.
“How about I start at the beginning of the sordid tale? The first time I saw you, I knew instantly you would belong to me. I’m a very patient man, my dear. I could wait. My father brought me to this hellhole and explained what he expected from me. I knew I would wait for his blessing. He planted me here with a new identity and the desire to learn all I could about you and your family. You should understand my father rules his family with a firm hand, an iron fist. I couldn’t say no, but then again, I wouldn’t have, especially after seeing you, so beautiful and feisty. I must say, my father is a very brilliant man. The apple didn’t fall far from the tree if I may say so myself, and well, let’s face it, I can. He’s been planning Matilda’s fall from grace for years.”
He moved to the side of the bed and gently wiped my tear-stained cheek with a white handkerchief.
“Don’t cry, sweetheart. Everything will be fine.”
His tone suddenly gentled.
He was crazy. He was destroying my future with every word he spoke. Lazily, his hand roamed further down to my breasts.
“I can’t wait to show you my world. You’ll come around to my way of thinking. We are scheduled to leave for California in a few days. I will resume my role in the family. They can’t wait to meet you, darling. Tonight is only the beginning of our life together. I promise.”
His way of thinking? Wait. Leave? I… I… Please help me, God!
“I’ve wanted you and waited so long. No one could sate my desire. After tonight, you belong to me forever.”
His finger traced the tear rolling down my cheek and continued wispily along the arch of my throat to my chest. He lingered a moment, swirling his forefinger around my breast before his thumb closed around my nipple, causing pain to shoot throughout my body.
I screamed, but it was muffled from the gag. Twisting away from the brutality of his touch, I was only able to move as much as the bindings allowed. Crimson stains and the smell of copper inundated my senses. I ignored what he said, struggling to find a way free.
I was stunned out of my attempts when pain shot across my torso. I focused on the small lines developing in its place, then the pain returned. I jerked my eyes up to see some type of whip in his palm ready to strike. It had a handle with leather strings dangling from the tip. Were those talons hanging on the ends?
With an evil grin, he delivered another round of agony. The whip found its mark again.
I jolt from the phantom torture, trying to get away.
The web of sleep falls away quickly as I spring forward in bed, panting. I scramble on all fours for the light switch. The soft glow overpowers the night’s darkness.
“It’s just a dream. It’s just a dream. He’s not here.”
Panting, I reach for the quilted comforter and lean back, snuggling into the security of my bed.
“I’m safe. She’s safe. He can’t hurt me again,” I chant over and over again, rubbing the faded scars lining my belly.
The repercussions of that night changed me, molded me into who I’ve become today. I’m no longer Fallyn Blackwood. She’s gone. Lost forever.
Sometimes certain decisions cause a rippling effect around you, and before long, the ripples in the water become waves threatening to pull you under. Treading water is never easy, but the alternative is not an option.
For me, the daily struggle is deciding to drown or swim in the shark-infested waters.
3
Oliver
You know the old saying ‘If something can go wrong, it will?’ That’s exactly how my day is going. Fucking Murphy.
I made it to the Seattle airport about thirty minutes before my flight took off.
Piece-of-shit alarm clock didn’t wake me up. Shitty wake-up call didn’t faze me. Probably because they only called once.
I made it through security and to my gate during last call.
Atlanta’s airport was a whole other clusterfuck. Lukas is getting an earful when I talk to him.
My connecting flight to Norfolk was on the other side of the massive airport. Seriously messed up. I had to sprint in order to make my flight. Again, at last call. By the looks I received, I’m sure I resembled a grizzly bear running after its last meal.
She’s in my head and taking up space. This shouldn’t be happening. According to my therapist from years ago, it’s transference or some bullshit like that. With all the stress I’ve been under, it’s no wonder she’s plaguing my dreams, too.
This has got to end soon. Thank God, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel for me. Now that we’ve finally found them.
The one bright spot in my crazy-ass day from hell is the truck I’m driving. Oh, yeah. Keagan would be hog-wild jealous. She’s a jacked-up midnight-blue, almost black Ford four-by-four. A chromed-out four-door beauty, and she purrs like a kitten. The enormous truck provides me comfort and necessity, and I like it, a lot.
Yes, I said she. All great machines are women. Maybe I won’t hurt Lukas too badly after all.
The man in black blares loudly, and I sing along. I’m a tad off-key, because let’s face it, I can’t carry a tune in a bucket. “A Boy named Sue” plays through the speakers of this sweet ride.
I’m going to have to get me one just like this when I get home. Or I might just take her with me. I’ve been considering buying something else for a while. I need something covered for the fickle weather in Florida. Can’t ride Freedom, my beautiful custom vintage Harley, around in the rain all the time.
My attention focuses on the road as I pass by a sign that says ‘Welcome to Smithfield, Virginia.’
I studied the area online during my long flight from Seattle and discovered a local B&B, Smithfield Inn. The inn is a good setup for my operation until I can assess how long I’m going to be around.
Smithfield places me about four miles from the spit-town of Rescue. Literally, you spit and it’s gone. Mega tiny. So, it stands to reason why Matilda would choose this location. It’s also close to some type of water, which is another factor connecting all the places Fallyn and Harper have lived.
