by B. N. Toler
When I finally emerge, Connor and the kids are cleaning up lunch, minus McKenzie. She still refuses to leave the guest room. Grayson is sitting in his seat repeating “baby dinosaur” over and over again. My heart breaks a little. Something is not right, and I know it’s the last thing Wendy and Jeff will want to hear. But I have to say something. Grayson needs help, and the sooner they get it for him, the better.
“Thanks for handling lunch.” Grabbing the sponge from the back of the sink I start wiping the table down. It doesn’t look like it needs a wipe down, but I’m desperate for a reason to avoid eye contact with him.
“I just wiped it off Demi,” J.J. volunteers.
“Oh, well you did a great job,” I say. “Thought I saw a little spot. Guess my vision is getting bad in my old age.”
“I want to see Mr. Jenson. He said he’d give me candy,” Mary-Anne pipes up.
“Maybe later,” I tell her as I run a hand over her blonde hair. “But don’t go over there without me, okay?”
“Yes, ma’am. Can we go outside and play?” Mary-Anne begs. “I brought sidewalk chalk to draw on your driveway Demi.”
“If Mark will go with you and keep an eye on the three of you, you can go out. And I want to see my entire driveway covered in art. If you do a good job, I’ll have a treat for you.”
“Yay!” The two barrel off to find Mark, arguing who will draw the most or best pictures, and Grayson, noting the commotion, climbs down off his chair and runs after them.
“How many hours until bedtime?” Connor chuckles as he does his signature head rub.
“Approximately nine,” I jest. “You’re saving my life this weekend, ya know? Thank you for all the help. I’m afraid I was incredibly ambitious to think I could handle them by myself.”
“It’s been pretty fun, minus the sibling drama. They’re good kids.”
“Yeah, they are. I love them to pieces. They might be the closest thing I’ll ever have to children.”
Connor cocks his head slightly and looks at me. “Why do you say that?”
The comment was off-handed. I hadn’t meant it to sound like I was throwing myself a pity party. “Who knows if and when I’ll remarry? Maybe children aren’t in the cards for me.”
His mouth quirks up in a smirk, a smirk conveying disbelief. “No way. A woman like you Demi . . . you need babies. Lots of them.”
He always says the kindest things to me. And every time he does I find myself eager to hear another compliment or praise; somehow his opinion of me has come to matter much more than it should.
I laugh a little. “I don’t know about lots of them. I think this weekend has proven an effective method of mental birth control. But one,” I smile faintly at the thought, “one would be nice. But maybe it’s not meant to be, eh? What about you? You want kids?”
He crosses his arms and inhales deeply as he looks off in thought. Then his dark gaze meets mine again. “I always wanted kids. I worry, like you, maybe it’s too late. I mean, I’m thirty-six.”
“Hey, watch it now,” I warn. “Thirty-six isn’t old,” I point out. “You’re only four years older than me.”
“No,” he chuckles. “It’s not that old. But these things take time.”
“That they do,” I agree.
“Well, I haven’t completely let go of the idea. I guess the hardest part for me will be convincing a woman to love a man like me enough to have my child.”
This time, I cock my head and look at him. I know what he means; he’s a convicted felon. But I wish for one second he could see what I see; the kind heart and easy attitude underneath the hard exterior. “Any woman would be lucky to have your child Connor. Never doubt that.” The words left my mouth before I thought of how . . . intense they sounded. Connor’s brows rise at my heartfelt statement and the reality hits me of what I said. Did I just, in some backward way, say I’d be lucky to have his kid? No. No, I didn’t. Did I? Shit. I think I did. Was that what I was thinking?
Before either of us can say another word, J.J. and Grayson come flying back into the kitchen with Mark carrying a giggling Mary-Anne by her ankles.
“Do I have to take them outside?” Mark grumbles. “I was sleeping until Grayson jumped on me and kneed me in the nuts.”
“I’ll make you a deal,” I wager. “How about a nice grilled steak for dinner tonight.”
Mark’s blue gaze jerks to mine. Teenage boys; sex and food. That’s all they think about.
“Macaroni and cheese . . . the homemade shit, I mean stuff?” he corrects himself when I cut him a warning eye.
“Okay, that’s fair,” I agree.
“Let’s go guys.” Mark encourages as he heads toward the back door.
As soon as they’re out the door, Connor adds, “I would’ve taken them outside for steak.”
“Good to know,” I laugh. “Now I know how to get you to be my servant.”
Connor gives an easy smile. “All you have to do is ask.” Then he walks out.
By the grace of the almighty, we survive the weekend. Wendy and Jeff don’t stay long when they return to pick up their children, and although I love her dearly, I’m grateful. I have no idea how they survive on a daily basis. Before they leave, I let Wendy know we need to talk. I want to know why McKenzie believes she knows so much about Connor. I also want to know why she hates my house so much. But it’s a conversation that has to wait. As the Tuffman’s speed away, Lexi pulls in the driveway where Connor and I are standing. I roll my eyes as she climbs out of her car, her hair disheveled and sunglasses covering what I know are ‘leftover from the night before’ makeup smeared eyes.
“Your timing is impeccable, as always Lex,” I mumble as I cross my arms and shake my head.
“I’m here, aren’t I?” she groans in defense as she uses her body to clumsily shut her car door.
“Yeah,” I snort. “And they just left.”
She curls her lip in annoyance as she looks at my street. “Damn,” she murmurs. “I’m sorry.” She shrugs, then, “Do you have any coffee?”
Connor chuckles and pats my shoulder, I’m guessing his way of sympathizing with me even though he finds Lexi humorous. I ignore her question and turn to him with an exhausted grin.
“You saved my life this weekend,” I admit. And he did. I’m not sure I could’ve survived two days of Tuffman kids without him. It was yet again another time that he has shown a part of himself I didn’t think was in him. And looking up at him now, I can feel the way my view of him has changed in the short time he’s been home. There were stereotypes and preconceived notions that skewed my perception of him even before I met him. But slowly and in the most profound way, Connor has proven something I should have known all along—you shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.
“I think I need a nap,” he laughs as he runs a rough hand down his face.
“Me too,” I groan as I reach my hands up to the sky and stretch. “Can I cook you a thank you dinner tonight?”
His smile fades a little, his hand moving to the back of his neck for a rub. “Rain check for tomorrow night? I kind of have something going on.”
“Oh,” I say a little surprised. And a part of me wants to ask if he has a date, but I tamp that down and move on because it isn’t any of my business. “How about Tuesday? I have plans tomorrow night.” I won’t push details on him either.
“Would this be date two with the painter?” Lexi interrupts . . . of course she does. “Maybe he’ll do some kind of Titanic shit where he draws a photo of you in the nude.”
My cheeks heat not only at the thought of that but that she’s saying it in front of Connor. “Pretty sure that isn’t going to happen,” I mumble, awkwardly, as I push some of my hair behind my ear.
“Maybe he’ll finger paint your bare body,” Lexi continues, goading me. She knows she’s humiliating me right now, and she loves every second of it.
“Okay, Lex,” I snap as I hold my hand up. “Let’s get you that coffee.” Looking back to Connor, the easy ex
pression and humor filled eyes seem to have vanished. Now his brow is slightly furrowed, and his mouth is flat. Lexi has obviously made him feel uncomfortable.
Rolling my eyes, I say, “Sorry. Tuesday night? That works for me if it works for you.”
“Yeah, Tuesday is good,” he adds quickly.
“Join us for coffee?” I ask as Lexi tromps up the stairs of my back porch.
“Nah . . . gotta get to work. But thanks.”
“Okay,” I half smile and give a little awkward wave. “Have a good day, neighbor.”
With a chuckle, he waves back. “You too.”
When I make it inside, Lexi is sitting at the table, mug in hand, sunglasses still covering her bloodshot eyes. “I have bad news,” she begins as I dump the cold dregs of my morning coffee in the sink and pour myself a fresh cup.
“Yay,” I mumble. I may not know what the bad news is, but I do know, without a doubt, it has to do with our mother.
“Gladys knows about Vick,” Lexi confesses before sipping her coffee. My shoulders slump with this news. I’d rather have had a chance to get to know Vick without my mother interfering with mindless gossip and boasting me as the sweetest widow this side of the Mississippi.
“That is unfortunate news,” I sigh in defeat, taking a seat next to her.
“Mr. Grenier was at the bar the other night and saw you two together. Called mom and gave her the 411.”
“And . . .” I question. Surely Gladys has given Lexi her in-depth opinion of Vick, a man she barely knows.
“She’s just happy you’re dating someone, and it’s not Connor.”
I frown with her words. It makes me sad my mother thinks so lowly of a man she’s never met. It makes me sadder she doesn’t trust my judgment. And it makes me saddest that Connor is so undeserving of her low opinion.
Lexi, sensing my dismal thoughts, changes the subject. “Damn I’m hungover,” she sighs.
“You’re hungover every day, Lex,” I point out. “Why don’t you take a few nights off from the party scene?”
She snorts. “Gotta party while I can.”
“Are you seeing anyone?” I ask casually. Lexi is no doubt a very sexual woman. That’s not to say she sleeps with everyone, but she isn’t shy about sex.
She blinks a few times, her gaze drifting away for a brief moment as if in thought before moving it back to mine and smirking. “His name is Bob. You’d like him.”
“Bob?” I question, smiling a little, happy to hear my sister is interested in someone. “What’s he like?”
Twisting her mouth to the side she mumbles, “Hmm.” Then leaning forward, she says, “He’s a solid kind of guy and knows how to show a girl a good time.”
“Well, those are both really good traits.” I smile.
“And whenever I need him, no matter what time of day it is, he’s always there.”
“I like him already,” I add.
She smiles at me. “Oh, you’d adore Bob,” she agrees as she picks up her cell phone and starts messing with the screen. “I have a picture of him.”
I sit up straighter, waiting to see this guy that has my sister so enamored. “Is he cute?”
“He looks like Zac Effron.”
“Really?”
She hands me her phone and when I glance at the screen, my brows furrowing in mild confusion, she bursts into laughter. “Your face, Demi!” she bellows out as her hand slaps the table top.
I look up and glare at her. The picture she has pulled up using the internet on her phone is one of a giant vibrator with some weird looking thing that sticks out.
“Demi, meet Bob,” she gasps between laughs. “My battery operated boyfriend.”
I roll my eyes and slide her phone to her as her body jerks while she tries to stop laughing. “I was excited you had a boyfriend that looked like Zac Effron,” I add dryly.
“Well I picture that sexy son-of-a-bitch every time Bob and I have a go at it,” she jests.
“Very funny, Lex,” I say, shaking my head. “You’re an asshole.”
“I know,” she chuckles. “Sorry. I had to do it.”
Seeing the moment has passed, she moves on once again to a different subject. “How was this weekend with the kids?”
I let out a long breath. “Long and exhausting. Thanks for all your help,” I reply snidely.
She smiles saucily. “Looks like you and Connor had it handled anyway. Were they at least good for you?”
I decide not to tell her my concerns about Grayson until I have a chance to discuss it with Wendy. But McKenzie is fair game and being that Lexi was a bit of a wild card herself growing up, maybe she can offer some insight as to what is going on with Kenz. “Mostly well,” I begin. “But McKenzie is going through some major mood swings. She was just . . . angry all weekend,” I try to explain. “And she was even rude to the Jenson’s when they came over to say hi.”
“The old dude across the street?” Lexi questions and I nod. “He’s always given me the heebie-jeebies,” she shutters.
“Really?” I question surprised. “He’s so sweet, though.”
“I’ve just always gotten a weird feeling about him. I don’t know. Must just be me.”
“Well, I doubt he’ll ever come back over after the way McKenzie treated them the other day. Not to mention she told me she hates my house and didn’t want to come over to begin with but Wendy made her.”
“Damn,” Lexi sighs, as her brows furrow. “She used to love spending the night with you. Think it’s because Blake isn’t here anymore?”
That thought hadn’t occurred to me for some reason. But Lexi has a point. Blake was always a part of our sleepovers, and he always made them fun. He’d make fires in the backyard for s’mores and take the kid’s for bike rides. “Maybe,” I admit. “I’m going to talk to Wendy about it. I love those kids, and I’ve been terrible about trying to spend time with them since Blake passed away. Maybe Kenzie and I need some one on one time.”
“Maybe, just don’t make it so obvious. You should include Mary-Anne as well. Otherwise, McKenzie will know you’re just trying to kiss her ass.”
“I’m not trying to kiss her ass,” I defend.
Lexi sips her coffee before saying, “You know what I mean but suit yourself.”
We share another cup before Lexi drags herself out the door and heads home for a nap. I busy myself cleaning up and washing laundry when I remember I never texted Vick back. I find my cell phone and power it on. There are two new texts from Vick.
Vick: Okay, okay . . . it isn’t that small. I don’t want to lie to you anymore.
Then,
All joking aside, I hope we’re still on for Monday. I’ve been thinking about you all week.
I can’t help smiling as I feel a little flutter in my belly. I don’t know where things will go with Vick, but it is nice to feel . . . wanted.
I text him my address and tell him I’m looking forward to seeing him, too. And just as I’m pouring myself a glass of sweet tea with every intention of curling up on my couch for a nap in front of the television, I hear Connor start his bike and take off. As I plop down on my couch, I try hard not to think about where he’s going.
Apparently my little sister thinks I’m an invalid, incapable of dressing myself appropriately for a date. I assume this because she returned, again, tonight to ‘help’ me dress for my date with Vick. After much debate, I let her convince me to wear my best ‘ass showcasing’ jeans, as she calls them, and a flowy, emerald green top that hangs off one shoulder and makes my dark hair and eyes pop. As I stare at myself in my full-length mirror, I have to admit, I look pretty good. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt anywhere near the word sexy, but tonight . . . I do. And the outfit isn’t too much, so I feel confident without feeling over the top.
“Your makeup turned out awesome,” Lexi notes as she sprays me with my favorite perfume, Happy Heart by Clinique. I fan my hand in my face as I cough because she’s sprayed too much.
“That’s to
o much. I don’t want to gag him,” I choke out between coughs.
“It’ll fade in a few minutes,” Lexi argues as she sprays me once more.
“Enough, Lex,” I beg.
“Okay, okay,” she groans as she takes the bottle back to my dresser. “You look hot Demi.”
“Thank you for coming over and helping.” Although I would have never asked her to, I do appreciate her trying to help me.
Before she can respond the doorbell rings. “He’s early,” she giggles. “You’ve got this guy jonesing for a piece.”
I roll my eyes and take a deep breath. “Will you go let him in, and pleeassee don’t embarrass me?”
“Moi?” she asks feigning offense. “When have I ever embarrassed you?”
I snort. “My senior year when Billy Thompson picked me up for prom, and you told him if he was hoping to ‘get some’ he better think again because I was on the rag.”
Lexi cringes as she bites her lip. “Okay,” she gives in. “One time I was kind of an asshole and embarrassed you.”
“Kind of an asshole?” I question.
“Okay,” she nods as she raises her hands in surrender. “I was a giant asshole, but seriously . . . that was only one time.”
“And how about when I graduated from college, and you flashed my professor at the bar that night?”
The doorbell rings again, and Lexi rushes to the door to answer it. “Okay, two times!”
“Don’t embarrass me!” I shout after her.
Staring at myself in the mirror I try to give myself a pep talk. “You can do this Demi. It’s okay to want to be happy.” I wait a few minutes before heading downstairs and find Lexi and Vick in the kitchen each with a cold beer in their hand.
“Hey,” I smile and give an awkward wave. I don’t know if I should hug him or . . . what? And Lexi being here is causing me to overthink it even more. If I hug him, she’ll probably make some obnoxious ‘Aww’ sound. So, I do nothing. I just watch Vick as he runs his eyes up and down me, and I can’t stop the butterflies I feel when he gives me a thoughtful half smile that borders on a look of appreciation.
