“I fucking love you, Lydia, more than you will ever know,” he says, bringing his face down towards mine. I glance up into his clear blue eyes and find his gaze meeting mine. “I love you, Ryder,” I tell him. “So much it hurts.” With that, he crushes his lips against mine, putting the pieces of my heart and soul back together. He fills in all the cracks, filling the empty spaces and holding me together.
With the touch of his hands, the kiss of his lips, and the whisper of his soul, he brings me home, putting me back together and making me whole.
EPILOGUE
two years later
RYDER
MY HEAVY FOOTSTEPS ECHO down the quiet, sterile hallways as I walk through the hospital. I pass by the nurses’ station and give a small wave to the older woman sitting at the desk. She looks at me with a proud smile, her eyes filled with joy.
“I was just in there and everyone was still awake,” she whispers, gesturing towards the door across the hall. “Go on now, get in there.”
I nod and smile before walking to the room. It’s quiet when I walk in and I carefully pull the door shut behind me. I pause for a second, listening to the hushed voices around the corner, and then slowly creep towards the sound. As I reach the corner, I see the three of them huddled on the bed together. The three pieces that make me whole. Trent lies sleeping beside his mom, plastered to her side. Her one arm holds him close while the other one cradles a little dark haired baby girl. I watch the three of them in awe.
My wife.
My son.
My daughter.
I couldn’t ask or want for anything more in life. I have it all right here.
Lydia looks up, seeing me, and her face lights up. She summons me with her eyes, and I don’t hesitate. I softly kiss her forehead and sit down on the edge of the bed.
“Did you want to hold her?” Her voice is soothing, soft and quiet.
“Of course,” I nod, holding my arms out for her as she places our little girl in them. She stirs and a hint of a smile forms on her sleeping face.
“I was thinking we could name her after your mom,” Lydia says as she looks at me. “Emily Rayne Owens?”
I look back at her, this beautiful soul—my heart; my wife. I look down at my daughter, beautiful just like her mother, and memorize her little face. “Emily Rayne,” I whisper, my eyes finding Lydia’s again. “It’s perfect,” I smile. A perfect name for a perfect little girl, just like her mother and her brother. She chose to name her in honor and memory of my mother; a beautiful tribute to her.
I hold her for a few more moments before the nurse enters the room, whisking her away to the nursery for a routine blood test. Lydia quickly sits up, and I see her wince from the pain in her abdomen where she was cut open.
“She’ll be right back,” I reassure her, rubbing her arms. She nods and slowly lies back down, clutching her stomach. Today was one of the days I’ll remember for the rest of my life. Lydia had a scheduled c-section with no complications, and it just so happened to be our one year wedding anniversary. It was amazing, being able to witness the birth of our baby girl and to hold her for the first time. My heart grows heavy when I think of the firsts I’ll have with her that I never did with Trent. I wasn’t there when he was born. Hell, I didn’t even know he was alive for two years. I missed all of that time with him and that was time that I would never get back. The only thing I can do is celebrate his life every day and relish in the rest of the firsts I’ll experience in his life.
I stand up from the bed and walk to the opposite side, scooping our boy up and carrying him over to the small couch. I grab a blanket and carefully cover him, tucking the edges around him. He’s almost as bundled up as his sister. Lydia waits for me on the bed with a lazy smile and heavy eyes. She slowly scoots over, and I lay down beside her on the small hospital bed.
“I’m so proud of you,” I whisper into her hair, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her flush against me.
She nuzzles her head against mine. “We’re all so lucky to have you,” she quietly says. “You’re the best husband—the only husband—I could ever want in life. And our kids have the most amazing, devoted dad, and believe me, they’re hard to come by.” Her breathing slowly evens out and it doesn’t take long for her to fall asleep.
Her words ring in my ears, and they’ve never been truer. Two years ago, I never imagined this is where my life would go. I was lost and alone until Lydia and our little boy showed up on my doorstep. That night changed everything for all of us. I had finally gotten her back and we finally found out the truth about Trent. That piece of paper inside the envelope would have never changed anything, but when we finally opened it and read the results, my stomach dropped. It was a match; he was my son. Trent was the miracle that survived the impossible. The both of us held each other and cried tears of joy, but also tears of sorrow for how different things could have been for us. In the end, the only thing that mattered was the two of them and the fact that I had them.
I knew it before and I knew it then; I was going to marry that woman.
One year ago today, we had a small wedding at the lake where we had our first date. We professed our undying love for one another, surrounded by our close friends and family. I don’t care for weddings, but to my girl, it was everything. And that is exactly what I intend to give her for the rest of our days.
A few short months later, after thinking she had a bad stomach virus, we found out that Lydia was pregnant. This time there was no doubt. There were no scares or worries. This time she wasn’t alone. She had me. She’ll always have me.
Suddenly, the door creeps open and the bassinet is pushed in with the nurse behind it. I slowly sit up, careful not to wake Lydia. The nurse pushes Emily over closer to me.
“She did great,” she smiles, picking her up out of the bassinet. “You have quite the special little girl here.” I smile at her as she hands her to me, and she exits the room, pulling the door shut behind her.
I hold her close, smoothing her dark hair back and softly kissing her forehead. Rising to my feet, I slowly sway back and forth, rocking her in my arms. My eyes scan the room, first landing on Trent, taking in his sleeping form cuddled up on the couch. Then my eyes travel to Lydia, lingering on the soft, peaceful expression on her face. I’ll never tire of looking at her. My gaze ends on our newest edition, Emily, with her delicate features, both innocent and pure.
I look around the room at the three of them, feeling my heart growing in my chest.
We’d traveled through the depths of hell and back.
Where once only darkness lingered, a new light now burns, bringing with it a new life.
Acknowledgments
This book took longer for me to write than I intended. I grew attached to Ryder and Lydia and I wasn’t ready to end their story and give them up. They deserved to have a proper happy ending, and I hope you all felt that they got that.
All of my readers and my biggest supporters: I owe you more thanks than I could ever give. You all stood behind me, cheering me on and being on my ass about getting this book done. Sometimes, we all need a good push. So thank you all for the shove!
To my beta-readers: Kayleigh, Terrijo, Talon, Kolleen, Cheri-lee and Mandie- You’re all amazing ladies. Thank you for all your help with your insight and suggestions. Each of you helped in your own way to work out the kinks in this story.
Audrey, my dope ass editor: You’re the bomb.com, no doubt. How you’re able turn shit into a masterpiece blows my mind. You killed it.
Kassi: What would I have done without your critical proofreading skills? I appreciate every little wrong word that you were somehow able to spot. You are awesome.
Every book I write will always be for my little demonic children even though your eyes won’t see these books for many years (but I know they will sometime because you’re both sneaky, nosey little shits). I love you both more than all the stars in the sky.
Jeffrey, my forever: What the hell did I do to deserve you? We’ve
been together for 8 years and I’ll never have an answer to that question. I have dragged your sweet ass through hell and back and you always hold on, never letting me go. You put up with more shit than I knew to be humanly possible. You keep my head afloat when I feel like I’m drowning and my feet on the ground when I feel like I’m flying. There are no words that could ever express my love and appreciation for you, but you better believe I’ll spend the rest of my days trying to show you.
-Spin off duet coming Fall 2018-
Traces of Her
(Ghost Girl, Book One)
Prologue
“You’re kind of fucking creepy, you know that?” Jared gives me a look of disgust.
Like he’s one to talk, fucking psycho.
“Just look at you,” he motions towards me. “You look like a fucking ghost. Your hair’s all white and shit, with your pale ass skin and you’re so tiny, you’re like barely even there. I don’t know what the hell Griffin sees in you.” He gives me a perplexed look. “It’s gotta be the pussy then or something.”
I stay silent, like the ghost that I am. I’ve learned long ago that I’m better off keeping my mouth shut. Especially when you’re stuck in a cabin with someone who is mentally deranged.
Jared strides across the room towards me. “Up you go,” he says, pulling me to my feet. “We’re gonna go for a little walk.” He leads me outside onto the porch, letting the door slam behind us. I look up at the moon that barely lights the outdoors. The woods are almost pitch black, barely making the trees visible. He let’s go of me for a moment, turning on his flashlight. He reaches back out for my arm and I swiftly pull it away.
‘’I can walk on my own,” I tell him.
“Don’t even think about pulling any shit, little girl. I’m not afraid to hurt you,” he smiles. I’ve seen what the man is capable of. I’m not an idiot.
I stare back at him. “Shall we?” I motion towards the woods. He walks down the steps and I follow behind. He leads the way, taking us deeper into the darkness. We walk for what feels like hours, until we reach a rock formation. He shines the light onto what looks like an entrance. “What’s in there?” I ask him.
He looks over at me like I’m stupid. “Obviously they’re caves.”
What the hell are we doing here?
He starts walking towards the entrance and goes into the caves. Reluctantly, I follow behind him. It’s dark and cold inside, with the walkways narrow. It doesn’t take long until we meet a dead end. I peek around him and see a door made from metal bars. Jared messes around with a lock on the door until it’s free. He pushes it open and grabs ahold of me. He presses his body up against the wall and in one swift movement, he shoves me into the small enclosure.
I land against the opposing wall and quickly regain my balance. As I spin around, Jared already has the door shut and is locking the lock.
“What are you doing?” My voice is laced with panic, for the first time in years.
“Well, it appears that I’m locking this lock,” he looks up and smiles, “and trapping you inside there.”
“Don’t do this,” I tell him, “I’ve done nothing wrong.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he nods and rolls his eyes, “I know.”
A sense of terror courses through me.
Not again.
“It’s all up to Griffin now,” he says, giving me one last look. “Fingers crossed he shows up in time.”
With that, he walks away, taking the light further and further away, until I’m alone.
Just a ghost; alone in the dark.
Books by C.M. Radcliff
Duet
When Darkness Consumes
Returned to the Light
-Coming soon-
Ghost Girl Duet
Traces of Her (book one)
About the Author
C.M. Radcliff lives in Amish Country, Pennsylvania with her husband and two kids. She spends most of her time enjoying life with her family. She speaks fluent sarcasm, dark humor, and has the mouth of a sailor. In her free time, she enjoys the beach, canoeing, fishing, and reading (of course). She currently works as a pediatric nurse.
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